In My Place
by ccmaja
Summary: When Bella meets Edward,he is instantly hers...but not fully. Edward is already taken but it doesn't keep him from his desire to keep Bella for himself. All is revealed and their love is damaged, but he fights to get it back. All Human, Lemons ensue!
1. Chapter 1

**Its **_**fanfiction folks....the whole thing is from a story based on charactors someone else wrote...I write things that fit and most times its straight from me. Ido however reference the great great show, Gilmore Girls and Pride and Prejudice... I dont own it, and I aint getting paid to try. Hope you enjoy the story!**_

_

* * *

  
_

I awoke in the morning to pure and utter self loathing and pain. Pain from knowing I had to face an embarrassing round of questions from friends that wouldn't take a simple scowl and arm cross from me as an answer. To be honest I'm not sure its the questions or the answers that bother me more. I wish I could just lay in this bed and pull the cover over my face and just wallow a little longer in my own sorrow. Sure it's not exactly making me feel better, but at least its only myself I have to deal with.

before I could settle on that bright idea my phone started chirping and vibrating next to me on my night stand. I didn't have to look at it to know who it was... its the same person who sent me the last thirteen messages in the hours before I had succumbed to sleep. The same person who called my phone at least twenty three times since the I had left that god forsaken restaurant the night before.

Slowly getting out of bed I decided it was time to get this over with and just let the day begin. Stepping into the bathroom I started my shower and let the water heat up while stripping down from my black lace bra and matching panties that served as my pajamas and also as a humiliating reminder of last night, I had been far too exhausted to even change completely and too lost in the sobs of why I wore the set in the first place. It sure as hell wasn't supposed to be for my benefit, it was for Edward.

I stepped in and let the water run down my face as I tipped my head back so that the it could wash over my back and hair as well. Letting the heat envelop me I started to think back to whole mess and the blow up from last night. How could I be so stupid? Really stupid at that.

**(Last night)**

"Bella, please don't run from me! We cant fix anything this way, please just stay here and talk to me! We can go wherever you want to talk! Just give me ten minutes to tell her something and we can go, just you and me, baby." I stood stock still with an incredulous look on my face I'm sure. I literally felt like I'd been slapped or kicked or spat on...well maybe all three.

"Edward, I cannot even begin to tell you everything that is wrong with that statement, and I'm not even going to attempt to try. I can't do this anymore. I... I thought I could but I cant. You have priorities and responsibilities that you need to take care of. _She_ is your priority and _her_ feelings are the ones you need to focus on. I'm just the person who came along and complicated that." He recoiled into himself when I said that last part, but what they say is true. The truth hurts. I know because my truth just stared me in the face. It had strawberry blond hair and eyes as blue as the sky. She had legs that never ended and the face of a supermodel. The truth had never hurt so bad in all my twenty six years.

"Isabella there is nothing further from the truth!" he seethed at me but softened as he looked me in the eyes. "Bella you know I love you! You have to know that after everything that's happened no one could ever compare to you. Ever." He said it with such conviction I almost caved and flew into his arms. I didn't though. My brain had a stronger hold on me at that moment and everything inside of me was as cold as a stone. I couldn't of moved to him if I wanted to at this point. Turning my back on him I closed my eyes and steeled my self to say the words I knew needed to be said. "Edward" just his name was hard to say and I wasn't sure I could get the rest out. Behind a strangled sob I continued," I know this isn't what you were hoping for, but its the way things are none the less. I'm a girlfriend girl, Edward. I have boyfriends not escorts. I thought I could be different even for just a little bit but I cant. I'm not blaming you, I'm just saying I cant be what you need me to be while you're with another woman...I just can't." And with that I walked forward and opened the door to my car. It took all my will power to just turn the ignition but I did it. I drove my self home the eight blocks and continued to focus on just opening the door as I pulled to the curb of my building before the aching in my chest could take me fully.

I was pulled out of my reverie as the hot water was giving out. I shut the water and grabbed my towel from the hook beside the curtain and toweled off. Stepping from the shower I reached a hand out and rubbed at the fog on my mirror. Even with the steamy room I could see the tired and defeated look on my face. It was the face you see on a person who has finally accepted defeat but still feels cheated. Its the face you wear when you get the news that there is no answer for that age old question your searching for, whatever it may be.

My eyes were puffy and I had smudges of black under my eyes from the make up I never removed last night. The shower only made it worse.

I grabbed my face cleansers and got to work. I might feel like crap but I'll be damned if I have to walk around looking it. When I was finished in the bathroom I padded barefoot in my towel back to my room. As I made it down the hall, I could hear the chirping and vibrating again and it made my stomach lurch. I grabbed my phone to shut it off completely but not before I gave my masochistic side something to dwell on.

Sixteen messages were now visible on text and they all began with, "" _Please Bella" If I__ read them, it would only hurt more and I didn't think my body could survive that much pain. So I simply powered down and dropped to my bed. _

___Towel and all I crawled back under the covers and just let the tears take me. I had no one to blame but myself. I knew better but I simply didn't care. It was the first time I had ever let myself be greedy and god help me I loved every minute of that man in my life, my arms and my mind. I fell back into sleep with thoughts of those moments shared in the past weeks that seemed so far away now._

___*****************************************************************************************_

I awoke what seemed like minutes later to a loud pounding sound on my door. It rattled and shook with the sheer force behind it and it scared me. I grabbed my cell phone from the night stand and powered up again in case in impromptu call to 911 was needed and thre on the nearest thing I could find to replace the towel from my body. When it was over my head I padded down the hall quietly trying to be as stealth as possible. However being me I tripped over my Yoga mat and fell face first onto the hard wood floors. It made a very audible thump and I couldn't help but groan at the pain it had caused my head.

My aggrivation was overwhelming now for whoever it was behind the door knocking. Not only had they woken me from sleep that I desperatly needed, but now they had caused me to fall over and possibly bruise my brain.

As if sensing my irritation, the knocking continued but at a much softer volume than before. I crawled up on my hands and knees and stood. I made my way to the door and looked through the peep hole and audibly groaned while still rubbing my forehead.

I knew this would have to happen sooner or later, but I was hoping for the latter. I decided now was as good a time as any to get this over with as my resolve for the distance was probably as good as it would ever get. With a deep breath and a heavy heart I opened the door to my only heaven and now personal hell.

"Hey" was all I could mutter as Edward stood before me. He looked me up and down for a moment before he stepped forward in a brusque move and enveloped me in his arms while his lips forcefully met mine and my legs wrapped around his body.

Okay so maybe my resolve was shakier than I thought, but god help me I felt whole again.


	2. Chapter 2

**(The Scientist)**

Our lips met and were in a frenzy to get as much from the other as possible. I tightened my hold on his waist with my legs and he groaned at the feel of us coming together in all the ways we needed.

Edward walked forward with me securely wrapped around his body and kicked the door shut behind him. When I heard the door shut something in me snapped back to attention and I forced myself away from his lips and let my legs go slack from his waist.

I slid back to the ground and as my bare feet touched the floor I realized Edward was still holding me tightly to his body and it felt as if he had no plans of letting go**.**

I needed to get a hold of this situation before it got out of hand again.

"Edward, can you please let go of me?" I spoke the words softly so that he would understand I wasn't angry this time.

He held me securely still and shook his head no from side to side then answered,"I don't think I can Bella. I don't want to. I-I'm afraid I'll never be able to."

He held me a little tighter and was rubbing down my back in a slow comforting rhythm. He held me as if I was the most precious thing in the world and it was making my resolve falter stroke by stroke.

I pulled away from him and just stared for a moment before motioning to the living room for him to sit down. With a resigned look on his face he walked towards the couch and sat. I was still in the entry way when he spoke up. "Please come and sit with me Bella, let us figure some things out."

His voice was pained and his eyes were red. I wanted to go to him and place his head in my lap and sooth him to sleep, but it wasn't my place anymore. It never truly was if I was being honest with myself. I made to move forward but then I realized what I was wearing. I had on Edwards T-shirt from three nights before and only his T-shirt. He had left it in my room after changing to go to dinner. I couldn't have this discussion in just a shirt.

"Sure, just give me a moment okay?" I said softly.

He nodded his head and I started down the hall to my bedroom. I removed his shirt and grabbed a set of panties. I slid the pink lace over my hips and moved to my closet and threw on a simple blue cotton strapless sundress.

When I was finished I grabbed his shirt and made my way down the hall into the living room, placing his shirt on the back of the couch as I sat down with my legs next to me on the couch.

Edward was opposite me and had watched intently as I had come into the living room. With all the strength I could muster I began.

"So...what would you like to figure out?"

He ran both hands through his hair and blew out a loud breath. He stared at the floors for a moment then spoke up.

"Bella I know that things got really fucked up, and I cant even begin to imagine the pain you must have been in last night. I wont pretend to even understand...but ...I-I know I have no right to even ask it or hint at it, but I'm essentially a selfish man and I will. Bella, I just need to be with you. Please don't cut me out of your life. I know I made a mistake but I'm trying to do the right thing by everyone. Everything last night only strengthened my resolve to fix this, I don't want to hurt you anymore. I cant stand to know that I'm the one who is causing you pain when all I really want is for you to be happy. I'm choosing you Bella...I want you."

I couldn't let this topic go on much longer. I could feel the tightening in my chest begin when he spoke of last night. I had to keep this conversation on track. To ensure things were ending...not continuing.

I made to speak but my mind couldn't come up with anything to say so I just shook my head no. I looked him in the eyes and saw that the flicker of hope he held while speaking was now replaced with a painful comprehension.

I wouldn't give him false promises, I was better than that. I squared my shoulders and sat up, my posture and words deceiving, because on the inside I had fallen apart by each word he had spoken.

"No" I began.

I took a deep breath and continued.

"I just cant do this. I know you didn't mean for anyone to get hurt and I forgive you for all that has happened, I don't blame you. Truly I don't. But I don't want to be that person anymore. It was a stretch for me in the first place but I tolerated it because I wanted you more than anything I have ever wanted. I wrongfully and foolishly reached out to grab you and I got burned. I have no one to be angry with but myself. But now I'm faced with a decision of continuing or stopping and I need to do the right thing even if it means losing you. I'm choosing my sanity right now and nothing more."

I finished my little speech and kept my head down. I couldn't look at him, not yet. I took a few deep cleansing breaths and found the strength to looked up. He sat there with a look I couldn't quite place, he shifted in his seat and opened his mouth to speak but thought better of it and closed his mouth.

We just sat there staring at each other and not speaking until finally he figured out what he wanted to say. He moved forward to the edge of the couch and leaned forward as to show the intent of his words.

"Bella, I'm sorrier than you can ever imagine. I feel sick to my core knowing that your feeling anything but loved. I'll do whatever you want me to, just tell me how to make this better, anything. Please just tell me what I can do." He pleaded.

Even though I wanted to hate him and be mad, I couldnt. I loved him too much. His pained expression and desperate plea ate at me and as much as I wished I could give him what he needed, I couldn't.

I had nothing for him, absolutely no words of encouragement, because I was resigned to our fate. I had accepted it last night when I walked away, and I needed to make it clear now.

"Edward are you still with Tanya?" I asked quietly and with serious question.

He took in a sharp breath and winced. I knew the answer I just needed for him to say it.

His head hung and his shoulders hunched. "Yes, but..." I cut him off immediately.

"Then, Honey...we are where we are. Accept it."

He stood up and was on the verge of breaking down when he responded.

" I cant accept it! I cant! I don't want her! I _hate_ her....I hate how shes fucking my life up day by day and how she's tainted our love for each other by simply existing!"

I was shocked to say the least but his words didn't change a thing.

I also stood and said the only thing I could. I spoke the words calmly and very quietly.

"Don't hate her Edward. She doesn't know how you feel and therefore she isn't to blame for anything other than wanting you. Even I know that wanting you is something you should never be faulted for."

I turned and started towards the door, pausing before I reached it.

I turned back to the couch and grabbed his shirt that I had placed there.

"Here.... I'm sure you'll be missing this soon." He shook his head and waved his hand away.

"It looks better on you anyway" he said with sadness.

I opened the door and he stood still, just staring at me for a moment before taking steps forward. He paused at the door and I had to mentally scold myself for the longing I felt in that moment. I didn't mean to actually speak the words I said next.

"Maybe we can just be friends." After the words had left my mouth, I regretted them instantly.

Edward looked like he was going to argue but then decided against it. He was thoughtful for a moment and then spoke softly to me.

"Whatever you need me to be Bella, I will be it." And with that he turned and walked out and I shut the door. I sat on the couch and let the last few minutes catch up to me.

I wanted to go back to the start and have a chance to make things right again. I wanted to take back the conversations of that evening and mostly I wanted to keep my distance. But you cant go back in time. If I could have I would have stayed home.

* * *

**(****How we met****)**

It was Saturday afternoon as Alice and I sat outside Caraboo Coffee drinking our delicious iced Chai Tea Lattes. She was currently trying to get me to go with her for dinner and drinks with her brother and his friends. She'd had her eye on a man named Jasper that was a best friend of her brothers. She had spoken of nothing other than that man for the three months I had known her.

Alice and I met at a yoga class we were both taking before work three days a week. Turns out we had a lot more in common than just that. We also lived on the same block and shopped at the same grocery store. All this was realized after running into each other various times after our first meeting in class. And she quickly became one of my best then she had been trying to drag me to outings with her family from time to time but between my deadlines and heavy work load I had yet to be able to make one.

So here we sat in the beautiful Chicago weather that was summer. She decided to pull out all the stops for me to agree to this, because she started pouting and thinking intently. Finally she hit me with her offer. "Okay Bella, if you come tonight then I promise to give you one free pass out of shopping with me at any time you feel like. Hows that sound?"

So not fair. That little pixie was really desperate to offer that. She knew that I hated shopping "Alice Style". It was just plain painful.

With a scowl in place I nodded my head and agreed to the evening. I hated going out of my element and having awkward conversations with strangers. Nothing about the idea was appealing to me because I knew Alice would be too wrapped up in Jasper to really be of help in that department.

I had never met Alice's brother nor had I heard too much about him. Alice usually went on about Jasper mostly, and every now and then she would mention her brother in passing. From what I knew he was in his residency at Michael Reese Hospital and was trying his best to get that finished before he decided to have a life as Alice had so eloquently put it.

By the time eight o'clock rolled around I was primped and polished to Alice's standards. Mostly because she primped and polished me herself. I had on a mini black cocktail dress that was short sleeved style and had a V-neckline and embossed pattern down the front and center of the dress. I had to admit, between the dress and the smoke eyes Alice had created as well as my hair cascading in loose curls down my back. I looked pretty darn hot.

I was starting to feel better about going out but I was trying to push past having to meet a group of strangers. Men strangers at that. I usually don't fare well with the opposite sex. I'd dated and been flirted with but I usually end up not being that interesting or adventurous for it to go beyond a few few drinks or a date if I was really lucky.

We approached The Gage at around 8:25pm. Alice sauntered up to the Hostess and gave the name Cullen. As the hostess searched for our reservation I took note of Alice's confidence. She always carried herself with a sense of worth and made no effort to hide her knowledge of it being inside her. Tonight she wore a champagne lace colored cocktail dress. It was strapless and gave her curves a dangerous appeal. It was obvious as she turned heads while we walked with the hostess to the far corner of the restaurant.

When we approached our table I started to feel uneasy about the outing again. The table was surrounded with four men who were adamantly discussing whether or not a man named Demetri was, as they stated "whooped."

We walked up on the part where a man with blond hair had made his voice louder than the rest and said,"Look Demetri...were just saying that when you have to ask permission to have a drink after work and you don't have children or a wife at home....well its just a bit on the controlled side. So....now that's out of our system we can turn our attention to a better subject at hand. These two gorgeous women standing at our table."

The blond waved his hand over appreciatively towards Alice and myself. I felt the heat rise up into my cheeks as the feel of these four men's eyes were on me. I stared at my shoes appreciating the peep toe pumps Alice had picked out for me as if they were the most interesting thing i had ever seen.

Just as I was about to make up an excuse to find the restrooms, a hand was on my arm and I felt an electric current humming through my body. It startled me from my embarrassment and when I looked up my breath caught as I was met with the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen.

Standing before me was a man around 6'2 he had a strong jaw that was unshaven but not grungy. His hair was brown with hints of red and copper through out the untamed mess. He looked as if he had just stepped out of a GQ photo shoot or better yet like he had just been freshly fucked. Yup.... whoever did that is one lucky bitch I thought to myself.

I found myself hating whoever it was that got to touch this man. He was looking more god like than anything at this moment. I found myself wondering if he was gentle in bed or if he liked rough unbridled passionate sex. I wondered if he whispered in your ear as he was moving in and out of your body. Did he like to watch you cum first or was he selfish in that department?

A throat cleared somewhere in the background and we both blinked our way out of the daze we seemed to be in. I immediately felt like an idiot having been caught ogling whoever this man was and bit my bottom lip as I silently prayed for a hole in the ground to open up and swallow me whole. I chanced a look at Alice and she winked at me. She flipping winked.

Alice's voice chimed in and began her hellos to the table. I was just standing there in the same place with my feet cemented to the ground unable to move any which way." Hey guys!" Alice exclaimed." Its been too long since Ive seen my favorite men of Chicago! Everyone this is my friend Bella."

I willed my self forward to the waiting table of men and began introductions. Felix was the first to greet me. He was about 5'8 with dark hair and strong features. His eyes were blue and I felt a bit uneasy under his gaze. I extended my arm and shook his hand with pressure I knew wouldn't even begin to rival his. Next I met the blond who turns out was Jasper. He had a kind smile and gave me a kiss on the cheek instead of a handshake. His hair was wavy and he was dressed nicer than everyone else at the table. I wondered briefly if he'd done it for Alice.

The man named Demetri was next to greet me, he also kissed my cheek and gave me a warm smile as to welcome me to the group. He looked relieved to have the attention off of his personal life at this given moment and I felt bad for mentally calculating a way to get discussion back to that so that I could just blend into the seating and be forgotten.

I moved to the two empty seats at the end of the table and was stopped by the same electric current as before. I lifted my gaze to meet the eyes of the Adonis again. When I met his face he had a lopsided grin on and looked as if he had just found some long lost item he had been searching for. Alice's voice carried over to us and she said, " Bella this is my brother, Edward. Edward.....this is Bella." I was still staring at him in wonder when he finally opened his mouth. "Hello Bella. I'm Edward....Edward Cullen."

I opened my mouth to say something...anything... but just then the waitress walked up and was asking for mine and Alice's drink orders. I was once again shaken from my reverie and asked for an extra dirty martini. After Alice gave her order she ended up sitting in between Jasper and Felix effectively moving Demetri next to me and Edward.

The three of us sat in silence for a moment and then Demetri's phone began to vibrate. He huffed and rose from his seat to take the call out side. As he retreated from the table he began with "Hey babe....No I'm not done yet..." I heard a chuckle from beside me and turned to see Edward with the sexiest grin on his face. He looked at me while still chuckling and said,"I don't envy him at all!" I started giggling remembering the discussion Alice and I had walked in on.

My drink came and I pulled my card from my clutch to start my tab. Edward immediately pushed my hand down and told the waitress my requests would be on his tab. I started to object but he just shook his head and sent her on her way.

"Thank you, that's very kind of you but very unnecessary... I should pay my own way... you don't even know me..." he cut me off from my speech with a finger over my lip and saying, "No Bella I don't know you, but I would very much like to. Please lets get to know one another so that you wont fret over my spoiling you....because either way I'm going to... I want to." I was speechless.

I was brought from my memory by a faint knock at the door. I rose up from the couch and looked through the peep hole. I opened the door and stepped aside. Alice walked in, shut the door and held her arms out to me. I collapsed into her and let the sobs break through me.... this was gonna be a long road.


	3. Chapter 3

I own none of it! I just like to picture these characters. ;) THanks for reading!

* * *

**_(Lost) EPOV: of Bella's chapter 1 _**

I felt disgusting. I just stood there and watched her get in her car and drive away. I wanted to run to her and hold her to my body, to never let her go from my arms again. But I couldn't. It was as if someone had weighed me down with cement boots on the ocean floor.

Her words hit me hard. They went to a place I had never known existed in my body. When she said that she couldn't do this anymore I saw my life flash before my eyes. It wasn't the life I lived that had flashed to me....it was the life I would never have. I saw Bella in a white gown walking toward me on her fathers arm. I saw Bella resting peacefully in my arms with a full round belly to show as proof of our love. I saw our home and our holidays. I saw our dinner dates and our arguments over buying her nice things.

She had continued to tell me how I had priorities that weren't her. I couldn't wrap my head around that though because to me she was the only person in my life who's feelings meant anything important to me. Then she hit me with Tanya's feelings being my priority. I literally flinched when she said that. I didn't want to be the person responsible for that woman's issues anymore. I literally began hating Tanya with every fiber I had when I saw the defeat in Bella's face. It had never been there before. She always carried the knowledge of my undying love for her as a shield against anything or anyone...well she had for the past six weeks that is.

She said she was the kind of girl who had boyfriends and not escorts. It was in that line I had truly seen how fucked up this whole situation was. I had made her feel less than the goddess I worshiped her to be. She felt cheap and used and toyed with. I made her feel that way. I was so angry at myself that when I spoke it came out much harsher than I intended. I told her how far from the truth that was and that I loved her so much and how no one could ever dare compare to her. It was true. Her beauty was truly unrivaled.

It didn't matter anymore what I said though. Because she stopped listening to me. She wouldn't believe me anymore and I couldn't blame her. I had fucked up...and I fucked up bad.

It was supposed to be an easy night. Bella and I were meeting my family out for a nice dinner at Petterino's and catching a show at the Oriental. I had spoken so much of Bella to my mother and father since I had met her and they wanted to know this amazing woman whom Alice adored as well. I was anxious to say the least, not because she would be meeting my family, but because they would be meeting her. I had never brought a woman to meet my family and It was not lost on my parents the significance of this event.

I had to work that night and had arranged for us to meet at the restaurant after getting off my shift at the hospital. I hated the thought of my love being without me while she undoubtedly looked gorgeous. I wanted to have that moment of walking in with her on my arm for all to see she was mine.

As I was approaching Petterino's I felt my phone vibrating in my jacket pocket. I quickly pulled it out to see who was calling. The screen flashed a name that made me halt my steps. Tanya... ugghhh! I hit ignore for the fourth time today and quickened my pace to get there before Bella. I hadn't even listened to any of the messages Tanya's had left earlier while I was at work. Just as I reached the doors I felt warm arms wrap around my middle. I froze instantly because there was something wrong with the way they felt. I had no urge to hold on. My body wouldn't react.

I turned to see who was enveloping me and when I faced the owner of the arms my stomach fell to my feet. It was Tanya and she was dressed to the nines and obviously attempting to stake a claim to me. I looked at her for a long moment in what I'm sure was shock. I couldn't form a rational thought. What the hell was she doing here? I certainly didn't tell her about it nor would I ever invite her to be near my family...EVER!

When my thoughts finally caught up with my mouth I blurted the first thing that came to my mind." Tanya what the hell are you doing?!" she gave me a puzzled look and stepped back a bit but not enough to release me from her hold. "Eddie baby what do you mean? I'm not late am I?" she looked genuinely concerned for a moment and then spoke again. " Sweetie I've been calling all day to confirm tonight. I wasn't sure what all the evening entailed, but from the note pad by the phone I got the gist. Am I over dressed? Is that why your upset?"

I stood frozen for a moment because I felt like the worlds biggest stupid fuck. She saw the note for dinner tonight and a show at the Oriental. It was vague but looked like any other note I would have scribbled her about a message or reminder of some kind. Fuuuuuck. I hadn't meant for her to see it. I was in such a hurry when I wrote it. It was a reminder to myself as my mother gave me the details to pass onto Bella.

Tanya usually goes to my place after her meetings on Friday afternoons to wait for her sister Irena. My place is just three blocks from the center and she gave me this sob story of not wanting to be in downtown with all the "crazies" as she put it.

Either way I was fucked and I knew it. What do you say? "Oh yeah, shit that note wasn't meant for you. Sorry about the confusion but we'll talk about it later cause I gotta go take the love of my life to meet my family." hmmmm well that would definitely get the message across wouldn't it? Before I could react to her words she breezed past me and entered the restaurant.

I quickly followed suit to stop her but she had already given my family name to the hostess....shit! I grabbed her wrist lightly and stopped her from moving. "Tanya we need to talk" she gave me an exasperated look and pulled back. "Eddie, look I know your worried about us all getting along but don't worry I'll be good. I'm so pleased that you've finally taken this step for our relationship. I was starting to think you were over us." she leaned in and kissed my cheek and turned back quickly to follow where the hostess had gone.

I was at a loss as to what to do. I couldn't let her approach that table in fear of the reaction it would elicit from my family and......Bella, Oh god NO! I quickly glanced over and saw my family watching with confused looks on their faces but I couldn't worry about that I had to find Bella and keep her from this pain. My eyes raced over the table to find her but I only saw a stunned and silenced Jasper looking at me like I had just announced I was going to quit the hospital and join the circus.

Then it happened. Tanya approached my mother and father and began her introduction. "Dr and Mrs. Cullen how good to meet you finally! Ive heard so much about you from my Eddie" when the words were finally said I couldn't do anything but lay back and wait. My mother sat there with a look of utter confusion and my father...well lets just say my dad has a way of speaking volumes with his eyes. Alice quickly rose from her seat and grabbed my arm pulling me to the back of the restaurant. I was scared now.

"Edward Anthony Cullen what the hell is wrong with you?!" she seethed through clenched teeth. I dropped my head and said the only thing I could say. "Alice I can explain..." she cut me off with a gasp and faint "Oh no" because during our little exchange Bella had arrived and was now standing next to my mother with a look of utter confusion on her face. I turned to make my way to her so that I could find a way to fix this enormous mistake but it was too late.

As if right on queue, Tanya chose that moment to make her self not just seen but heard. "Hello! I'm Tanya Denali, I'm Edwards girlfriend." I could see Bella's body stiffen as the words finally settled on her and I had no idea how to even attempt to make this right.

My father was now standing next to Bella with a comforting hand on her shoulder as my mother placed a gentle pat to her back. It tore my heart to see how they had already began their protectiveness over my Bella, just as they would do for Alice and I.

When I reached Bella I placed my hand next to my mothers and said the only thing I could utter."Hey" when she turned to me I could see her eyes were glossy and that she was shaking a little. I cant even begin to imagine what she was feeling in that moment because to be honest I was still feeling the shock of this man made hell myself.

I waited for the wrath. I braced myself for the slap and the embarrassing show my family would have to witness and endure because of my selfishness. It never came.

Instead Bella being the amazing woman that she is turned and squared her shoulders while extending her hand to daintily shake Tanya's. I had never felt less worthy of anything in my entire life. Never.

"Bella....Bella Swan" she stated with the most generic smile that I had ever seen on that lovely face. Immediately after, she turned back to my parents to formally greet them."You must be Dr. and Mrs. Cullen, its truly a pleasure to meet you both. Alice has said so many wonderful things about you. Thank you for inviting me tonight."

Something flickered in my mothers eyes and I can only assume she was taken back by Bella's reaction. My mother prides herself on three things in her life. Her work, her family and her manners. So it wasn't lost on her I'm sure, the amount of class and demure it had taken Bella to behave with such grace. A lesser person would have no doubt caused a scene.

My father exhaled a small breath that sounded like a gasp and looked to Bella with genuine awe and placed a kiss on her forehead. He looked her in the eyes and said, "Please call me Carlisle, Bella." my mother returned the gesture and asked her to call her Esme. If I wasn't in such a shitty situation I would have run to her, taken her into my arms and asked her to marry me right then and there. But I was in a shitty situation and right now my "girlfriend" was looking at me with what could only be described as jealousy over the intimate moment my parents just shared with Bella.

Alice spoke up and welcomed Bella over to sit with her and Jasper. I'm sure it was to keep Bella farther away from the image of myself and Tanya together. Jas looked at me and gave his head a slight shake as to say "sucks to be you" yeah...thanks ass hat. Before Bella could move, my mother grabbed her hand and gave it a gentle pat and said,"Bella dear please sit with me and Carlisle we would love to hear more about you." I smiled weakly at her from where I stood but she just acted as if I wasn't there. she took her seat next to my parents and settled herself in.

Tanya once again was scowling in her direction with pure contempt because I'm sure she thought that this was her big night to be welcomed to the family. How wrong she was. This whole night was for Bella. Everyone but me was seated already and had started talking amongst them selves to distract from the big pink elephant in the room. Tanya called out to me, "Eddie sweetie, are you going to sit with me or are you still nervous?" I shot her a look that I'm sure can only be described as annoyed.

I made my way over to her side and sat down. I was now seated directly across from Bella and my mother with my father to my right. Tanya was clinging to my arm and trying her best to look the part of the doting girlfriend.

My parents began to ask Bella about her job as a staff writer and what her plans for the future were. My mother was thoroughly impressed with Bella's life and accomplishments and my father gave her a proud smile as she regaled them with stories of her years attending Yale. My father having been a Yale Man was truly taken with Bella now. The two laughed and joked sharing stories of their time honored school traditions. One of which they both had been involved in. It had something to do with Mory's and "Cups"

"Bella, who sponsored your membership to Mory's while you were at Yale?" My father asked with a smile while still chuckling.

"Oh, well I was fortunate to have a roommate who's parents were both members and Yale alumni. They insisted on it because when they would visit Cammie...what was my roommate. they would always see me sitting on the lawn of old campus listening to the Whiffenpoofs. I loved hearing them sing." She smiled at the memory.

My father smiled and nodded along and seemed to be lost in his memories as well. He lifted his glass and toasted to "Handsome Dan"

Tanya was getting stiffer and stiffer by the second while Bella and my father talked. She had none of the same In's with my family as Bella did. Tanya was a model from the time she was 17 til about 8 months ago. She had dropped out of school and got her G.E.D so that she was able to keep pace with the demands of her shoots. She didn't have stories of starting from the bottom of the barrel to climbing the mountains of success.

She was patient for a while just waiting for a moment to steal the spotlight from the exquisite Bella, but that moment never came and Bella continued to ignore us and focus on my parents. They did the same.

Alice would chime in with a proud story of Bella here and there as well to egg my parents into asking more questions and getting more stories in return. Finally Tanya had enough and her true colors started to shine.

"So Bella with all your hard work at Yale and now at the Tribune consuming your life. Do you find it hard to be alone? I mean yeah you have your job and your friends but don't you feel like your missing out on the most important aspect? Love is not something you want to miss out on. Is it Eddie?" I tensed the minute this evil woman next to me had spoken. I chanced a look at Bella and her face held a look of pure pity. Not for herself but for Tanya. I knew when she spoke that it would hurt me but I would take it a hundred times over to spare her anymore pain.

"Actually Tanya yes. It is hard to juggle my life sometimes but I'm trying to find a balance that will make it all work out. When I entered Yale I had a firm motto I held to for those four years. You want to know what it was?" Tanya nodded but had a smug look on her face. Bella responded with" My motto was, "I'll have a life after I graduate from Yale with honors". It made turning down parties and dates and spring breaks worth it to have an accomplishment that no one can ever take away from me or diminish. You know, I once used to shy away from telling people I graduated from Yale because I wasn't sure if it would sound as if I were bragging. But I've learned that I've earned the right to be proud. You see my looks with what little they are ...will fade someday. But my degree from Yale will always carry the same prestige no matter how many years go by."

My father wore a smile that would rival the sun for dominance and raised his glass again."To Bella" he toasted. I smiled wide at her conviction. "To Bella" we all toasted back. Tanya harrumphed and scowled again but bit back with,"But still don't you long for love? If Eddie weren't in my life I would be lost." she actually sounded sincere and I had to fight back a groan. Bella smiled demurely and said,"I've had love, but its complicated." I winced and looked down. Tanya couldn't let it drop though, her fuse was lit and she was ready to pounce. "Well I just think that love shouldn't be complicated. You either love someone or you don't. If you do that person is your number one priority and nothing and no one else should matter. Not even family." she said that part I'm sure for my mother and fathers sake. She gripped my arm and joined our hands. "Sounds to me like you need to hold your personal relationships to the same level as your education and career because it seems like you wont settle for anything other than the best for those." I felt like somebody had sucked all the oxygen out of me.

My father looked from me to Tanya with a raised eyebrow and shook his head slightly. My mother always ready to defend her family was now ready to jump in for Bella."Tanya I think Bella's more than capable of finding her way in this world without a man to lead her." Bella took a sip of her drink and held back a grin that was threatening to show on her face.

Alice and Jasper had been in their own little bubble. No doubt Jas was filling Alice in on the Tanya situation and trying to find a way out of this mess. Just then our bill came and my mother gasped,"Oh my! Carlisle the show will be starting soon lets make our way next door and get seated." It hit me then that we didn't have enough tickets for everyone to get into the show, and it was currently sold out. Tanya was now apparently my date. Shit. Bella was going to be the odd man out.

My stomach fell for the hundredth time that night and my breath was tight in my lungs. How much more would she have to endure tonight because of me? I felt sick just imagining the scene that would play out in just a few short moments and I mentally began preparing a way to get rid of Tanya. If it came down to it, I would have the ugly truth out with her right there. I would do anything to keep Bella from hurting any longer.

I stole a glance at Bella, and for the first time that night I saw the pain in her usually carefully composed face. She breathed deep for a moment to compose her self and stood.

Bella passed my father a crisp bill for her share of the evening, but he quickly let her know that her money was no good with him. Bella began to protest but he silenced her by saying it was another Yale tradition called "Old Blue Meets New" and he had now completed the task. She smiled and thanked him again for his kindness as he reached over and patted her arm.

Bella then turned to us all and said good evening to everyone. We all sat shocked for a moment except for Tanya. I knew my mother wanted to ask her to stay with us but I can only assume they wanted to let her escape this mess too. Tanya once again being the banshee she is called her out on it.

"Oh Bella, what a shame you wont be joining the family for the show." she said it as if she were part of the family as well and I saw my mothers eyes tighten.

"No Tanya, unfortunately I wasn't able to secure a ticket in time and the show is sold out. Make sure you enjoy it. I know people who would love to be in there with the Cullen's tonight." she smiled sadly and turned to my parents."Carlise...Esme...thank you so much for a lovely dinner. I hope to see you all again someday."

I knew what she meant by that. She was done and would not be seeing them again, with me as the reason. Fear stared to set in and I stood abruptly. My mother knew what I needed to do and even though I'm sure she wanted to beat me senseless she jumped in as a buffer. "Tanya, you hardly said anything about your self. What is it you do?" hook, line and sinker. I excused myself and quickly sought after Bella.

As I walked outside I saw her waiting for her car at the valet. I moved toward her to with the mission of fixing this now.


	4. Chapter 4

**EPOV:**_**After Bella Left The Restaurant **_

When I walked back in the restaurant everyone was still seated and wore somber expressions. Well except for Tanya. She was still going on and on about how her life was just one big red carpet after another. She made it a point to drive home the fact that even though she didn't go to an ivy league school she was still an example of what a woman can become with the right motivation.

My mother actually agreed with her on this one point. She looked Tanya square in the eye and said, "Your right Tanya, you are exactly what a woman can become with a specific motivation in mind."

Alice started giggling and my father had to pretend to cough into his napkin to save from showing the smile I saw tugging at his cheeks.

Tanya was to say the least confused and took it as a compliment. She held her glass up and said,"here here" I hung my head and closed my eyes. I couldn't believe the most amazing woman I had ever known or wanted to know had walked out of my life and in her place was this shell of a person sitting next to me.

If I thought the entire table wouldn't point and say "that's what you get", I would have been crying right then and there.

I felt a tugging at my arm and cracked an eye open to see if by some miracle the banshee was replaced with an angel named Bella. Sadly I was met with ice blue eyes that reminded me of a wraith.

"Eddie pay this and lets be on our way already!"

Tanya slapped the check in front of me and began gathering her purse and wrap. I grabbed my wallet and took out my credit card. I was hit with a fresh round of pain all over again when I realized I was now technically out on a date with her. This woman had now met my family and would be accompanying us to the theater. I was paying for her meal and pulling out her chair.

I felt like I was in some sick alternate universe where all things good were replaced with your absolute worst nightmare.

I wanted to share these things with Bella. I wanted her to have my coat draped over her shoulders when she got cold or hold my hand when she felt sentimental during the play.

Instead I had Tanya on my arm and when she held my hand I found any reason what so ever to let go and fidget with my playbill or get a drink.

Finally the play ended and I made no effort for small talk. I stood up shook my fathers hand and kissed my mothers head. I hugged Alice and had a silent conversation with my eyes to Jasper.

Tanya waved to my family and turned to leave. She stopped dead in her tracks and turned to my mother. "Esme dear, I hope when we all get together again we'll find time to bond. I know we didn't get much time tonight with Alice's little friend monopolizing you. But maybe for 4Th of July we'll find the time at your family picnic."

My mother stood with a pleasant enough smile on her face to the outsider, but we Cullen's knew what was going on underneath.

"Oh I'm sorry Tanya. See our family picnics are for immediate family only. Our holidays are the only times we get to catch up fully and enjoy being a family together. As tradition stands only Cullen's and their fiances or husband or wife are allowed to attend. Well, we do have a couple of exceptions... like Jasper and Bella, but we've considered them family since the moment we met them."

My mother smiled sadly as if it hurt her to deliver that news. I knew better. So when Tanya gave her an icy look and said,"But you've only met Bella tonight right?" I knew the message my mother was sending.

"Why yes dear we did only meet her tonight, but it feels as if shes belonged with us all always." and with that my mother walked by and patted Tanya's cheek. Match. Set. Point.

I drove Tanya to her home and after walking her to her door she turned to me and pulled me in by my hand. I steeled myself at the door and made to pull away but that didn't deter her. She pulled at my shirt and began kissing and nipping at my neck.

I hadn't been intimate with Tanya for over four months. I barely gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek at most. I had no idea why she hung around and more importantly what she was getting out of this arrangement of hers.

I pulled back and shook my head, I had no desire to play the charade tonight. With that I turned and walked out the door only to hear whimpering as I shut it tightly behind me. I honestly didn't care if she cried for hours or days.

I felt like my world was gone and though I felt that way I could see how life had just gone on ahead without me. I sat in my car and attempted calling Bella again. It rang and went to voice mail. Again. I had been trying to call her since she drove away. I sent texts during the show as well, but none were returned and I was sick with worry.

As I drove off my phone started buzzing I quickly grabbed it and pressed talk hoping to any god that it was Bella."Hello?" I said in a panic.

"Son we need to talk." shit. I knew I was gonna have to face the wrath that was my father sooner or later but I was hoping to have things squared away with Bella first. So much for that plan.

"Hey dad" I said with a heavy breath. "Look I know you and mom must be really upset and I deserve everything that you will give me and more, but please I just need you to be there for me right now" I was starting to break down internally and externally and I needed for someone to tell me things would be alright.

"Oh Edward" my father said in what was a sympathetic tone. "Where are you son?" "I'm on Michigan ave" I said.

"Your mother and I are at your sisters place. Come over and we can talk alright?"

I knew Bella lived on Alice's block and the thought made my heart leap at the chance of being so close to her. "Okay dad I'm on my way"

As I made my way south on Michigan avenue. I thought about stopping by and checking on Bella. I wanted to hold her and tell her how sorry I was. I wanted to kiss her pouty lips and make things right with her again.

As I passed her Loft I slowed to almost a standstill. I sat in my car and looked up to see her lights were off and I briefly wondered if she had come home. The dark image and somber feelings churned my stomach.

With one last look I continued down the block and approached Alice's home. I pulled into the parking garage and found space near my fathers Mercedes.

With one last shaky breath, I stepped out of my car and made my way to the 7th floor. When the ding notified me of the arrival, I made my legs move forward.

I was starting to feel the effects of tonight in a serious way and my body was starting to let me know I had to shut down and recharge. I couldn't even if I wanted to though.

As I let myself in, I saw that my mother and father were standing around the kitchen drinking coffee and talking in whispers. Alice was sitting on the couch with Jasper and flipping through channels.

"Hey everyone" I announced my presence and was rewarded with looks of pity, anger, and disappointment. The pity came from Jasper. The anger from Alice and lastly the disappointment from my parents.

I sat at the dining room table and placed my head in my hands. I deserved the anger and disappointment and I was ready to accept the fallout.

A gentle hand touched my left shoulder and I looked over to see my mother next to me with a sad expression."Edward, honey... how could you do that to her?" It was my undoing and I fell apart right there.

"I didn't mean for this to happen...I...I swear I would rather die a hundred deaths than ever hurt Bella! Its just that things got mixed up and complicated and I didn't face it head on like I should have. I let Bella down tonight!"

I thought I was done but another sob bubbled up bringing with it more words of regret. "She's my entire world! I hate myself more than you could ever know for what's happened...and...I...Ughhh! I don't know how to fix this!"

My mother started patting my back and my father had taken a seat to my right. When I looked up I saw a look on his face that could only mean he was trying to understand my thought process. When he spoke next I was sure I wouldn't be spared anything no matter how hard it was for me to hear.

"Edward, who is Tanya? We've never even heard you mention her before...ever."

Well hell here it goes.

"Well, Tanya and I have technically been dating for eight months, but..." I was cut off by a sharp intake of breath from the corner. When I turned I only saw Jasper's back following my sister to her room. Great.

"Eight months son? How could you let Bella into your life this way if you were already committed to another woman? It shows horrible character and is just wrong anyway you look at it!" I knew he was angry and disappointed and from the sound of it I'd say a bit disgusted.

My mother spoke up next. "Did Bella know about Tanya?" well this would not be easy to explain.

"I never told her Tanya was my girlfriend. I just told her I was helping her through something and that until it was resolved we would have to keep things hushed." I felt like a cad just saying it out loud. I felt ill all over again.

My mother kept her eyes focused but I could see the frustration beginning to leak out of them.

"Bella said she would be whatever I needed her to be right now because she loved me and wanted to support me no matter what the situation...I really took advantage of it. I feel horrible as it is. I just wanted to keep her...I was afraid she would find someone else...she's..well..she's magnificent."

Saying the words out loud made the reality of what I had done even worse. If I had been listening to this conversation as an outsider I would have been revolted by the things that were coming out of my mouth.

I had taken Bella's loved and twisted and bended it to fit into what I needed it to be. I didn't once look at it from her position or question my actions because in doing this my way I got to keep her. I got to keep her from the grasps of other men and leering eyes of her form at clubs and bars around the city. She was mine...and I wasn't fully hers.

My mother took a seat to my left and began.

"Yes Edward, she is amazing to say the least. I couldn't have chosen someone better for you myself, but its all broken now and to be honest it may never be repaired." I knew it was true but I didn't want to hear it.

"Edward" my fathers voice was low and angry. I knew he was beyond disappointed with me.

"You made that girl believe you were hers. She came tonight with the intention of meeting and joining a new part of your life..."

I didn't know who he was talking about so I Iooked up to get a read on his eyes to see if they would give something away.

"You don't know if I'm speaking of Bella or Tanya do you?" he called me out on it. I dropped my head and shook it no.

"That is what's worse to me. I may not like even an iota of Tanya, but she is a person nonetheless who deserves the truth from her partner and lover." I stopped him there.

"She's not my lover!" I spat out. I didn't want my love for Bella sullied any further.

"So your not intimate with her then?" my mother asked skeptically. I shook my head no.

"Not for over four months." my dad released a breath he had been holding and looked relieved.

"look guys, Tanya was in an abusive relationship when we met. I felt bad for her...she was a friend first and we developed feelings for each other over time. But they were never very strong..for me anyway. I tried ending things but she just wouldn't hear of it. She thinks thinks of me as a crutch of sorts. Anytime I tried to end things she becomes frenzied and says things like she'll be lost and have to go back to her ex. I couldn't just turn my back on her to live like that again. I thought I could help her get her life back and maybe her career again...her sister just came back in the picture about two months ago and she moved in with her. I thought it would be the turning point but it didn't change. I've been trying harder since Bella came into my life to get Tanya out completely. But its done nothing. I want her gone but I just don't know how to do it."

My dad immediately chimed in with an aggravated tone.

"It's not your job to take care of her Edward! You've done the best thing for her you could. Its her turn to take the reigns of her life."

Coming from my father I knew it was the truth. Jasper had been saying it for months, but I just ignored him. I didn't have a Bella to live for then.

I heard my mothers pain in her voice when she added her opinion.

"From the display I saw tonight Edward, her confidence is more than intact and her priorities are for a life of wealth and fine things. I saw the way she threw the check at you... like you were there to cater to her. There was no thank you, no concern as to if you wanted anything else...just "pay this already!" No she's holding out for the life you can give her...well for the life you already do give her." my mother finished by shaking her head and left the table.

"Its late and we must be going, but can I say one last thing?" my dad asked.

I nodded to him.

"Bella is nothing like Tanya...I...well I know that's obvious but I want you to understand the difference and what it means for you." I nodded in encouragement for him to continue.

"Tanya told us all that if she didn't have you she would be lost...I don't doubt the sincerity in those words. But on the flip coin, your mother hit the nail on the head...Bella doesn't need a man to lead her in this world. She wont wait for you this way Edward. Her life has doors open to her and if she's smart she'll take them." tears started again in my eyes and I couldn't stop them anymore.

"I'm not saying shes better off without you son. I can see you care for her. But having met the girl and speaking with her... well I'm just saying a girl like that wont be alone for long. She has her life together and is ready to take big steps when they arise. I hope you find the happiness you want Edward, but please don't do it at her expense. She should be happy too. Certainly you wouldn't begrudge her that."

"Dad I love her. I cant be without her." I whispered

He was silent for a moment and made no move to leave. Finally he spoke,

"You don't love her Edward."

I was angry now. What did he know of what was in my heart?

I was about to say these very words aloud when he hit me with, "Love places the person its directed to at the top of your priority list... Just hear me out okay?

As much as I wanted to say no, I couldn't. My father had never once given me advice that wasn't sound, and that fact had my stomach in knots as to what his words would carry. I didn't want to even imagine a world in which Bella would not be by my side. Reluctantly, I nodded my head yes for him to continue.

"What I mean is, there isn't anything I wouldn't do for your mother,nothing. I would break laws, defy nature, search for anything and be anything for that woman. I love her. Its that simple. And never in the worst of circumstances would I be able to humiliate her the way you did Bella tonight. Especially in front of my family. I...well...I just could never do it. And that means I could never ask her to put herself in that situation for me no matter how greedy a man I may be for her love. Her happiness is all I crave. Its been that way for twenty four years now. I suppose it always will be."

He finished his speech and knelt down to me.

"Love like that is given freely. Its not really a choice at all. Tonight Bella showed that love for you son. She could have made a scene. She could have made an excuse to leave...but she endured that humiliation because I'm sure she didn't want to embarrass you. She loves you and though I may be baffled as to why after all I have heard tonight, she loves you anyway. Earn that son."

I was stunned into silence. He was right, I was so busy focusing on being in hell that I had forgotten to ask myself why she would endure it all. She sacrificed her pride. She put up with snide comments about her job and her education, she put up with another woman in her place by my side. To top it off she was replaced for the evening plans with my new date, and when it was all said and done, she held her head up and honorably went away to endure her humiliation alone.

A fresh wave of hate hit me hard like a brick wall. I thought I would die from it. It was so painful I wasnt sure anyone else could survive it.

I hated myself.

My parents had left and I was sitting at the table alone when Jasper came out of the room.

"Hey man" he said.

He sat down next to me and I nodded.

"I'm sorry about tonight man" his voice low and pained.

Jasper was the kind of friend that when you hurt, he hurt.

"You have nothing to be sorry about Jas. There was nothing you could have done tonight to make it better."

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

That was the million dollar question. I knew I needed to end things with Tanya but first I needed to make amends with Bella.

I hoped she would still want me after all that had happened... when I fixed the Tanya aspect. I should have done this six weeks ago..hell four months ago.

"I need to see Bella first to know that"

He had a look of confusion then asked, "Are you going to stay with Tanya if Bella wont have you?"

Oh I see what he meant.

"No. I'm done either way, it's over tomorrow morning. But as far as Bella is concerned, I want to make things right. If we can talk through things tomorrow then I will make it my new life's goal to secure her hand by six months time. If we cant then I will need to work just as hard to secure her love again."

Jasper smiled at me and nodded. I gave him a weak smile in return as he stood to return to Alice and tell her the revelation I'm sure.

It was approaching two o'clock in the morning, and I couldn't wait for the sun to rise. I needed to get to Bella and see if we could fix this mess and start fresh. I was counting down the hours as I made my way to Alice's couch.

I just lay there and think of how good and pure Bella was. I thought of everything my father had said to me and how many mistakes I had made along the way since the moment I had met her.

I didn't sleep...I just rehearsed everything I needed to say over and over again until it was time to make my way to my life, my love, my Bella.


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own the characters, they are SM's

* * *

**_(someday you will be loved)EPOV: After she couldn't..._**

As Bella rose to her feet to show me my way out I couldn't help but wonder if she would kiss me back again the way she had when I took her into my arms when I'd first arrived. I was mentally calculating the outcome of just grabbing her and putting my lips to hers once more.

When she made to hand me the shirt she had been wearing I knew there was no way I could take it back. That shirt would torture me for eternity knowing it had been nestled up to those milky breasts and bare lips below her naval that I longed to tease, nip and kiss again.

No I would not be taking that shirt. Because I was fucking jealous of it. Yes I Edward Cullen was jealous of cotton. I waved it off and met her at the door.

Again I wanted to take her in my arms one last time but thought better of it. She had endured more than enough from me. Then she hit me with the friends statement and that went ahead and nailed the coffin shut.

I wasn't lying when I told her I would be whatever she needed me to be, because the words my father said to me last night had hurt me as bad as the look on Bella's face when she realized who Tanya was.

With my fathers words replaying in my head on a continuous loop, I left her building.

I began the drive home and was even more committed to the decision of ridding myself of Tanya.

When I arrived home. I sprinted out of the garage and through the front lobby of my building. I wanted this done and I wanted it done now.

When I reached my door I quickly made my way inside and grabbed everything and anything that looked like it belonged to Tanya. I took a Neiman Marcus Big Brown Bag and placed all the items inside. Hell I think I threw in a few movies that were mine but that she had liked because I didn't want any reminders here.

Once that was completed I did a last walk through and grabbed my phone. I quickly dialed Tanya's number and waited for her to pick up.

"Hey lover!_" _Her annoying voice came across the line as she picked up. I recoiled at the endearment.

"Tanya, I need to see you._"_ I said it in such a hurried tone that it sounded desperate.

"Well you know you don't need to ask sweetie your welcome here any time, baby." She said it with a low throaty voice which led me to believe she was attempting to be sexy. I rolled my eyes and realized she misunderstood the urgency.

"Look Tanya its not like that. I just need to see you okay? Can you meet me in 20 minutes?" I knew I sounded stressed and agitated so she had to know this was serious.

"O...okay?"she said it like a question because I'm sure she was trying to place the direction of the discussion we would have. I wasn't about to waste time so I continued.

"Great... I'll meet you you at Ricochets," And with that my plan was in motion. I grabbed the bag and headed down stairs.

When I arrived at the tavern, I was in logistics mode. I put the bag in my trunk so that she wouldn't have to actually _get in_ my car. The last thing I needed was a hysterical Tanya trying to give me a blow job in an effort to keep me. Yeah it's happened before.

I made my way to the back patio to sit while I waited for her to arrive. I kept replaying the evening in my head as to motivate me on why I had to do this now with no more excuses.

I didn't exactly hate Tanya...well okay I did. But I hadn't always. She used to be nice and attentive. I had seen her many times while out with a mutual friend. She would often look as if she were trying to place me from somewhere, so one night I decided to strike up a conversation and see where it would lead.

She told me about her modeling shoots and all the people she had met. She seemed to be interested in my family, my likes and dislikes from the start and I appreciated the attentiveness she had shown me. Most women were too busy wondering how much I made or what I drove and where I lived. But she hadn't asked once.

As weeks went on we continued meeting up with friends and talking. One evening we were all out and she seemed to be in a whole other place. I asked her if anything was wrong or if she had wanted to talk about anything. I expected a bad day...or a bad shoot maybe even a fight with a friend. But she told me about James and how he treated her when he was upset.

I hadn't known there was anyone in her life. She'd never mentioned anyone before so I assumed she was single. I didn't dwell on that though, because she went into telling me how he would hit her or slap her and degrade her around the house when he was angry.

I cared for her and truly didn't want to be someone with knowledge of abuse and turn my back. I had seen too many women in the E.R in situations like that and many of them didn't live to ever get the help they needed.

I offered her to stay with me until she was able to move on her own. She was hesitant at first but I assured her I wanted to help her so she accepted.

She moved into a guest room and all was well for about a month or so. It was easier than I had thought it would be. She kept to her room and would usually have a small meal made for me in the oven when I returned home from the end of my shift.

To be honest I had never had a woman take care of me other than my mother. I was more of the one ride kinda guy. I didn't want more or at least I didn't think I did. But having someone to talk to at the end of the day or pick up something from the store or run an errand was nice. And soon Tanya wasn't sleeping in the guest room anymore.

About three months into it things started to change though. Tanya became rude and insistent on my time with her. She no longer wanted to talk or help out. Often times I would come home to find Tanya dressed and ready to leave. She wanted to go out for dinner and drinks most nights even when I had just worked thirty two hours straight.

Jasper and Felix said things about it on more than one occasion and I began to take notice of other things. She was no longer sweet or caring. She was rude and judgmental toward any woman that joined our evenings with friends. Even if they were paired with Jas or Felix. Before long I was asked to leave her at home if I were to come out. I was embarrassed by her behavior to say the least and kept my distance from friends as well.

I had tried to end things around the fourth month but when I started the conversation she began weeping and telling me how sorry she was for everything. She said she would do better to make things right again and used the excuse of just being afraid of what we had because of James and that she must have unconsciously began pulling away.

I bought it and we attempted to salvage our relationship. It never got better and soon I was working my schedule so that I didn't have to be in bed with her at night.

When Irena moved to Chicago I convinced Tanya that she needed to help her sister with the transition to the city. I payed for her to have new furniture moved in their new apartment and even went as far as giving her some extra cash for decorating if she wanted. I was basically paying her to get the hell out now that I think about it.

I had felt guilty for putting her in this situation and wanted to at least make her comfortable somewhere else. I figured after having that independence and new start she would see it was best for us to be apart, but it never happened. I approached the subject of breaking up and she went crazy! She started bawling and begging me not to make her the woman she was. She said I was her salvation and that she needed me in her life because I made her strong and better than the shell she used to be. Tanya started saying things like she knew she was destined to just be with men like James and I should have just left her with him if I was just going to throw her away.

I felt like a dick. So I took it all back and the charade continued. Two weeks later...I met Bella.

I spotted Tanya and stood and waved a bit so that she could see me. Her face lit up and she waved back. I noticed her earning appreciative stares from the men around me and the only emotion it invoked was hope that maybe one of them would approach her and something would grow. I just wanted her out of my life.

She attempted to kiss me but I moved my face just in time. She ended up giving the corner of my jaw a kiss and immediately pulled back.

"Whats wrong?" she asked in a grave tone.

Siting down, I took a deep breath and began with the obvious

"This has gone on long enough Tanya... I wanted to see you today to tell you that I no longer wish to after this moment." I felt better already. I didn't know such words could be so freeing.

She stared blankly at me for a moment then spoke up.

_"_Eddie don't do this...we had such a wonderful evening with your family last night and I'm sure this is just nerves talking because of the step that comes next...don't worry, I'm not in a hurry to get married so there's no reason to feel like this. Its completely normal for a man to get shaken up after taking such a big step like last night."

My brow furrowed and I'm sure the expression I wore would gain a few laughs from an onlooker. I was beyond irritated now. And the only way to get this across would be to lay it all on the table.

"Tanya, your not understanding. I had really hoped to keep this last part out, because I wanted to give you that much peace, but you really are leaving me no choice."

I raised an eyebrow as to ask if she really wanted to hear this. She gave me a look back that said..."yeeeees...continue." So I did.

"Last night wasn't meant for you Tanya. I've been seeing Bella for six weeks now and last night she was to meet my family. The "note" you found was actually just details I had jotted down to tell her when I called her. You crashed her dinner and the show but she felt bad and didn't want to embarrass anyone so she went along with everything."

It wasn't the entire truth but it hit the highlights. Everything except Bella's reaction was in place and it served its purpose. I knew from the menacing look I was currently receiving from Tanya that she believed me.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me Eddie! That mousy little plain Jane is what you are choosing over me!? I cant believe you! How dare you sit there with no emotion and say such things to me!"

I took this moment to note the fact that Tanya was now standing and creating a scene. The same scene I waited for last night...the same scene that never came. I grinned as I recalled my fathers words from last night_, _"A lesser person would have thrown a scene".

My father was spot on. Bravo.

l stood and made to leave but nails were suddenly digging into the skin of my right hand a painful sting had just hit the side of my face. I didn't care. I didn't even acknowledge the fact that people were staring. I didn't chance a glance back at Tanya. I just made my way to the exit.

When I was outside I heard her chuckling from behind me. I decided to end this show and be done already. I popped the trunk and placed the brown bag on the sidewalk. I turned to leave just as she spoke.

"You know what, Eddie I have given you eight months....Eight! I even put up with your crazy work schedules. I've gone without sex and dates and lots of things that are required in a relationship. I can't just let things end like this." she said the last part with a wicked grin and it intimidated me for a moment.

I didn't get a chance to comment because what she said next had me mute.

"I was never in a bad relationship Edward. I've never been hit or yelled at or kicked or any of the other things you think may have happened to me."

I had no words. To say I was confused was putting it lightly.

_"You see Edward you have this flaw about you...its not something that's intolerable, its actually something you cant resist."_

I was totally lost now. All I knew now is that she was saying she'd never been abused. She'd never needed my help.

_"_You have a need to save people. Women in general if you ask me. Its called rescue syndrome. Oh you know it...your a Doctor." she sneered.

I just stood there while realization dawned on me. She kept speaking and all I could do was follow along and connect the dots.

"I had to have you. I didn't want to wait anymore for you to talk yourself out of it again. I made the whole thing up and you bought it." She was smiling widely and then something changed in her eyes and her smile faded. She had a thoughtful look on her face now as she began again.

"I did love you, Eddie. I still do. I knew that if I could just have you with me long enough you would see that we would be good together. Rose had told me how you were with women...I didn't want to be a casual bed call. I wanted you...and for the most part we were good, weren't we?"

I was livid now. I saw red and my head was light. My arms and legs had some kind of trance set over them because I couldn't move. My head was spinning faster and faster by the second. Three seconds had just gone by but it felt like hours.

I made myself move to my door because I was almost positive I needed to hit something and she would be my most likely target. I pulled the handle to open the door and she stared talking again. The last thing I heard before shutting the door were the words, _"weak" _and "_sorry"._

I pulled out and headed for my parents house.

* * *

**BPOV: _After Edward had left..._**

After crying a good half hour all over Alice's shirt, I had finally composed myself enough to pull back and begin the round of questions I needed answers to.

First things first. I needed to know that Alice hadn't left me hanging in the dark closet that was Edward Cullen. I didn't think she was the kind of person that would let a friend walk into the lions den like that without as much as a chair, but at this point what the hell did I really know about what a person is or isn't capable of?

I steadied my breath and steeled myself to ask the first question that I needed to have an answer to.

"Alice, did you know about her?" I closed my eyes and awaited the response that would make or break this friendship I had learned to depend on.

Alice lifted my chin and looked me square in the eye, "No Bella, I had no idea about that wretched woman. If I had I can promise you I would have stepped in the moment I felt something growing between you and Edward."

I released a breath I didn't know I had been holding. I felt the first bit of weight off of me and it gave me hope that with each question answered my heart might feel less weighed down.

"Oh thank god Alice. I didn't know what to think of anything last night. I'm still trying to wrap my head around what's happened in the last twelve hours. Its just so unreal."

She sighed and dropped her eyes to the floor before she began again.

"Bella I'm so sorry you had to go through that..." Her words were becoming tighter and higher pitched as she was battling her own tears. "I cant imagine what that must have felt like to have to sit there and go through the charade as you did. I-I'm certain I wouldn't have been able to do it."

I nodded to her as to acknowledge the fact that it was indeed difficult to endure.

"Alice, I need some answers and I know that I'm going to have to speak to Edward again to get most of these but could you please help me piece this puzzle together so that I can speak to him later rather than sooner?

Alice sat back and grabbed a pillow to get comfortable. Once she was nestled into the crook of the couch I began.

"Did Edward invite her last night to send me a message I wasn't receiving before last night?"

"No Bella, I know that it must have seemed that way but from what Jas told me Tanya saw something written down at Edwards and assumed it was details for her to follow." Her eyes were closed and she was slowly shaking her had back and forth as to drive home the big misunderstanding.

The answer should have helped but it didn't. In fact it brought on a whole new round of questions I hadn't even thought to ask before. Did she live with him? Were they engaged? It would certainly solve the mystery of why I had never been to his home or invited for that fact.

I was becoming overwhelmed by the volume of questions that began to flood my mind. My body felt heavy again and I could feel the knots in my stomach making a special guest appearance for my mental melt down.

I hadn't realized I was breathing so hard because suddenly the room was spinning and I couldn't see or hear anything around me.

The last thing I remember was the feel of something cool touching my cheek. I didn't fight the pull anymore. I just let the dark take me.


	6. Chapter 6

**BPOV:_ Awaking from the darkness._**

I was sleeping. It was in the type of sleep where you can hear whats going on around you, but your vision is black. I heard whispers of apologies...and promises? Hmm that's weird. I kept trying to open my eyes but I couldn't do it.

All of a sudden there was this horrible smell surrounding me and my eyes popped open. This was certainly one of the most random dreams I'd ever had, because was kneeling over my body with a kind smile and a tiny little vile.

I began to stir and he helped me sit up. I leaned back against the couch and waited for the dream to end. It didn't.

"How are you feeling Bella?" his voice was calm and soothing.

"Um...well I don't really know. What happened?"

He smiled and began to check me over with his medical eye ready to detect anything else wrong.

"Well, from what I gather, I believe you fainted."

"Oh...yeah I guess I did." Before the blush could completely settle I decided to experiment with standing.

He chuckled lightly and helped me to my feet. Embarrassment began to seep into my body as I realized he must have come at Alice's request. I certainly knew how to pick my moments of grace didn't I ?

"Did Alice call you over? Oh my goodness........I'm so sorry for being such a klutz! Please Carlisle, I'm sure you have things you need to do...don't let me keep you." I was talking fast from the embarrassment.

"Bella, really its no inconvenience, I'm glad to help you. Its my job." I was comforted by his warm smile.

"Thank you Dr. Cullen. I really do appreciate all your help."

Alice had just come around the corner with pillows and some water in her hands. She was so focused that she didn't see me standing. Her head was down and she was juggling her phone as she attempted to do more than her little body would let her.

"Daddy, I just got off the phone with mom and she said you need to call her as soon as you get a free moment." her head was still down and she was now spreading a blanket and pillow on the lounger.

"Okay sweetie, but lets get Bella settled first okay?"

Her head snapped up and the worried brow she wore melted away into a relieved smile.

"Oh Bella, how are you feeling sweetie?" She began to smooth away my hair and check me for signs of injury.

"I feel better now Ali, thanks for calling your dad. I'm sure I gave you a scare there. I'm sorry."

"Oh please don't apologies Bella, you have nothing to feel sorry about. I'm just glad your okay." Her voice was gentle and soothing to me. And I could see her eyes glossing over with tears. Before they could spill over she turned back to what she had been doing.

"Well girls, I'm going to head out now. Bella, if you have any more spells like that I want you to come see me okay? But as long as your staying vertical I think its safe to say it was just nerves."

Carlisle gave my cheek a pat and went to hug Alice. He was just about to walk out the door when he stopped and turned to me.

"Bella, I want you to know that Esme and I are very happy to know you. I'm sure the last thing you want right now are reminders... but as _Alice's_ parents, I just want you to know that you are always welcome in our home and our family. I know our meeting wasn't ideal, but it was truly a joy getting to know you. I hope we get more chances in the future. It would be nice to have another bulldog around."

I could feel the tears starting in my eyes. His words seemed sincere and from the heart.

I walked to him and hugged him tightly to say thank you. He hugged me back and whispered, "You have many wonderful things to offer this world as well as a partner Bella. Anyone who doesn't see that or treasure it is an idiot. Don't ever feel otherwise." With that he turned and shut the door behind him.

They were words I didn't know I needed to hear until I'd heard them.

I walked back to Alice and she also was crying. We hugged for a moment before she pulled back to ask me, "Are you done talking for the day?" I nodded and reached for the water and took a long drink.

"Okay, well I have some things I need to take care of, but if you need anything please call and I will be back here in a flash okay? I know you probably want to be alone anyway right?"

I could tell she was giving me the option of declining but I truly did just want to be alone. I had so many things I needed to think about. I also had to get my head straight before I could move forward and on from this nightmare.

"Thanks Alice, I'll call you if anything." She gathered her things and reminded me to rest and stay hydrated.

All too soon I was sitting alone again and my mind began to wonder.

Usually I dive into cleaning or work as a distraction but I knew that I needed this out of my system and no amount of work or Clorox would distract me. I needed to end this chapter and start a new book.

The good thing is that it had only been six weeks. Granted they were six amazing weeks that I had experienced feelings I didn't know I could posses, but they were six weeks nonetheless.

I do believe in love at first sight. I do now anyway. But I'm a sensible woman and a smart one at that. I knew what I needed to do. I needed to move past it like any other obstacle or challenge in the past, and I would. Because that's what I do and I do it well.

I gave myself permission to wonder back one last time to Edward.

**(more of how we met...)**

_"No Bella I don't know you. But I would very much like to. Please lets get to know one another so that you wont fret over my spoiling you....because either way I'm going to... I want to." I was speechless._

I stared at him with wonder for a moment and did something I still to this day cannot believe I had the courage to do. I placed my hands on both his cheeks and moved my lips to his in a soft and gentle kiss. I didn't linger, I simply kissed lightly and pulled away slowly. It was a simple kiss but I felt emotions run so deep in my body that I had never felt. Never. I felt a slow burn settle over me as our hypnotic moment settled over us.

I smiled to him, "Thank you, Edward. I appreciate that."

I made to remove my hands from his face and slowly withdrew them from him at a slow and feather light manner. His eyes were closed and his lips were parted. When my hands were back in my lap he opened his eyes slowly and I saw they were boring straight into my soul.

The intensity of his gaze was intimidating but I kept my eyes on him. Suddenly a euphoric grin spread throughout his face. I gently smiled back and dropped my gaze to the table.

The reality of what I had just done was catching up to me and I felt the blush creep up my chest and even out over my face. I cannot tell you what made me do it. I don't even know if I had actual control over it. But it was done.

I wanted to apologize for my forwardness so I turned my gaze to him again and saw he was still looking at me with that stupid grin.

"Edward, I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me, that was absolutely uncalled for and I didn't mean to just kiss you like that without permission...I can move if it would make you more comfor......" he placed a finger over my lips to silence me. I sat in my state of blush and embarrassment waiting for him to respond.

"Isabella, please don't apologize. I'm certainly not sorry and you shouldn't be either. And no I don't want you to move from me, because that would make me uncomfortable." As he finished he pulled my chair closer to his and draped an arm over my shoulder.

"There. Now I feel a lot more comfortable. How about you?" I smiled and nodded to him. Our faces began moving toward each other and just as he was about to kiss me, Demetri was suddenly at our side again.

"Hey you two... none of that! I leave for five minutes and your already trying to consummate it!"

I tried pulling away from Edwards arm, but he held me in my place with a firm hand and rubbed the length of my arm with his palm. His body had tensed and I could feel the shift in the energy from playful to protective.

I looked to him and saw he was glaring in Demetri's direction. His jaw was set in a firm manner and his eyes were in slits. Jasper chose that moment to chime in and break the tension.

"Oh don't mind Demetri, Bella. He's just trying to get us all to focus on something other than the fact that his warden just revoked his bail and that at any given moment a bounty Hunter will come running through that door and drag him back for sentencing!" The whole table erupted into a fit of laughter and I even giggled at the fact that Jasper was probably right. About the distraction at least.

Edwards body relaxed instantly and decided to throw another shrimp on the barbie.

"Hell Demetri, if that's the case go on ahead and take cracks at us all night! But if it happens next time were out... Bella and I are gonna have a field day with you!" He had the most care free smile on his face and he held me closer and kissed my head while he continued to poke fun at Demetri.

"Alright! Alright! I'll stop picking on you two! Geese...your already a dangerous duo. I ain't messing with you guys any more." Demetri said while chuckling and took a drink of his beer.

It wasn't lost on me that Edward had said "next time" and "Bella and I". I chanced a glance toward Alice hoping she wasn't upset by the development on this side of the table.

She had a bright smile and was holding Jasper's arm with both hands while he ran his fingers over her clasped ones. They looked so relaxed and comfortable with each other. Every touch they gave seemed to be unconsciously done and looked as if it were second nature for them to be together like that. I smiled to her and she smiled back and I knew she was happy for me too.

When it was time to order I was becoming self conscious of what to get. Edward must have noticed because his lips were at my ear, "Is there nothing you like on the menu? We can go somewhere else if you'd like." his face was thoughtful as if it was his fault that I wasn't taken with anything to order yet.

However it wasn't the food that was the problem. It was the fact he was paying for my dinner now and I didn't want to come off as if he were a meal ticket. This place wasn't cheap.

I shook my head no and leaned into him. "Its not that, its just that...well...I..Im.." he jumped in now.

"What is it Bella?" He turned his body to me and placed a hand on my shoulder and one on my cheek.

"Well its just that...oh this is gonna sound so stupid." I mumbled that last part and closed my eyes.

"No Bella, you can say anything to me. What is it?" his voice was concerned. So I decided to just get it over with and clear the air.

"Well you said you were paying for me tonight and I guess I'm just a little self conscious. I don't want you thinking I'm using you as a meal ticket or anything...cause...well I'm an eater, Edward. I eat. I'm not talking about salads or soups either. I like food and I often get carried away I guess. Can I just go back to paying my own way tonight? I'd feel so much better."

I looked down after I finished and exhaled a heavy breath.

"Oh Bella, please don't worry about that. I promise you those will be the furthest thoughts from my mind! Besides... I demanded to treat you tonight and I meant it when I said I want to spoil you. So just get what you want and don't think about anything else okay? Just please don't order a salad." He was sporting a grin now and leaned in to kiss my cheek.

I smiled and relaxed into his side. I felt so comfortable with him. It didn't matter that we had just met. I felt like we had known each other for years and that this was just any other Saturday evening for us.

When it came time to leave. Edward held my hand and led us out of the restaurant. Everyone was going on their own way now so I began to walk to Alice's side.

"Bella, Jas and I are gonna catch a movie so do you mind getting a ride with Edward?" I looked to Edward to see if it was a problem but he was already waving Alice and Jasper off.

"Yeah, no problem. Have fun and tell me if the movie is any good okay?" I said to her.

Alice and Jasper were walking arm and arm and taking in the evening air. I smiled after them and then looked back to Edward.

He was staring at me with a small smile and thoughtful gaze. I smiled back to him and he led us in the direction of the parking garage. As we walked he closed the distance between us and wrapped an arm over me protectively as a group of men had passed us.

I leaned into him and he ran his thumb gently over the top of my arm in slow strokes. We'd been walking in step together sharing a comfortable silence.

"So Bella, where do you live?" he asked as we reached the garage.

"I live in the Atrium building...south on Michigan. It's on the same block as Alice's building. Its not going to be too far out of your way is it? Cause I can just catch a cab." I didn't want to have him going out of his way just for me. I really would have been fine with a cab.

He stopped and turned to me. His brow was furrowed and his eyes were confused. He held my face just as I had held his earlier and leaned in to kiss my lips fully. It was slow and gentle. His lips were so soft and warm over mine. I felt my body molding to his posture as he gently ran his thumbs over my cheek bones. The kiss never intensified but it did gain emotion. I felt as if he were fusing to my core with the electricity his hold and lips had on me.

As we slowed, he gently pulled back to see my face. He placed his forehead to mine and whispered,"You could never be anything other than a priority, Bella. I can't explain it and I wont even try, but I just feel very...protective of you."

He closed his eyes and began the kiss again. This time I decided to deepen it. I wrapped my arms around his waist and began making long, slow circuits the length of his back. He moaned into my mouth and it only fueled me further. I began lightly scratching his back with my nails. Not hard, but just enough pressure to evoke another moan.

He took my bottom lip between his and gently slid his warm tongue over it, silently asking for permission to enter. I opened my mouth slowly and he began making gentle strokes on my tongue with his.

I was instantly wet. I was beyond turned on with the man currently attached to my lips. I don't know how I stayed standing because I felt my legs begin to waver. I couldn't think, I could only kiss.

He gently ran his right hand from my cheek to my neck. He tilted my neck to give him better access and started to move from my lips to my jaw and working his way to my neck. I was breathing heavily now and so was he. I pulled my self even closer to him so that we had no space between anymore. I exhaled slowly as I felt his arousal along my stomach. My panties got a new wave of wetness at that point.

Just as I was moving my arm from his back I felt a vibration. I was so clouded with lust that I wasn't certain if it was us or something else. But before I could question it he sighed heavily and pulled away.

I immediately felt the loss of his body and touch, but I let him be. He looked at me apologetically and reached into his coat pocket for his phone. I watched as his brow furrowed and he mumbled something to him self that I couldn't make out.

He shut his eyes tightly and held the bridge of his nose. I immediately thought he was regretting what we had just done and dropped my head.

"Edward, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I..well...I'm so embarrassed." I turned to leave. I figured I could just grab a cab and leave him to be on his way.

I started walking away from him with my gaze firmly in place on the concrete when I felt a pair of arms wrap around me. I audibly gasped as I was turned around.

Edward was staring down at me with a serious expression. I was sure he was going to ask me not to say anything to Alice, so not to upset her. I was preparing to keep my emotions in check and to not make a bigger fool of myself than I already had.

I dropped my gaze again and waited for the blow to my ego to come barreling down.

"Bella, please don't go. I don't want to be away from you...stay. Please." He said it with such tenderness, my heart nearly melted.

"Really?" I asked unbelieving. I was certainly not expecting those words and was finding it difficult to believe what he had just said.

"Really, Bella. I just need you with me. I cant explain it... I don't want to freak you out or anything but I just need to be with you. Please lets just stay together okay?"

At this point I wasn't sure if he meant for the ride home or for the night, but right then I realized I didn't care. He could have either.

I closed my eyes and leaned into his chest. He ran his hands through my hair and kissed my head tenderly. I exhaled and leaned further into him.

"I thought you were upset with me because of the kiss." I murmured.

He hugged me tighter and placed his cheek on my head. I could feel him shaking his head no.

"Never, Bella. It was the greatest feeling to have your lips on mine." He breathed the words low and then whispered into my ear, "I'm sorry I made you feel that way."

He kissed my earlobe gently, then started to suck on it lightly. I shuddered and unconsciously began panting. All of a sudden I was lifted of both feet and being carried bridal style through the garage.

I was giggling as he made his way through different rows of cars.

"Bella, your absolutely amazing." He said with awe. I looked up to him and smiled at what I saw. His face held a tint of pink and his eyes were shining with happiness. I reached up and pecked his lips gently. He looked at me and smiled even wider.

"Your so adorable, Bella. I had no idea it could be like this for me. If I had known I would of combed the earth for you." He kissed me hard and started walking again.

When we stopped he pulled his keys from his pocket and I heard a chirp. I was still in his arms as he opened the passenger door and knelt down to set me inside. I was reaching for the seat belt at the same time he was. I looked up at him smiling and rolled my eyes.

"I can buckle myself, Edward." He had a shy smile and nodded. I buckled in as he made his way around to the drivers side.

I took in the vehicle I was in. It had such soft leather seats and it smelled of Edward. I breathed in greedily as I admired the sleekness of the design. The dash, console, doors and armrests were swathed in leather. I saw the Mercedes symbol in the center of the steering wheel. I knew this was easily the most expensive car I'd ever been in.

I leaned back into my sports seat and the leather surrounding me fit like a glove.

Edward got in and started the engine. He looked over to me appreciatively and grinned. I smiled back as he buckled up.

"Edward, this is a beautiful car." He looked back to me with a thoughtful expression and said,"Its value just went up with you sitting inside." I couldn't help the eye roll that escaped me. I shook my head and began to giggle. "Edward, I'm already taken with you. There's no need to break out the smooth lines anymore."

He shook his head and held a serious expression. I just continued to giggle.

"Bella, you really are gorgeous. It wasn't a line. I really do believe that you make everything you touch more beautiful." And with that we made our way out of the garage and onto the road leading to my home."


	7. Chapter 7

**_(You had me at hello)EPOV: On The Drive Home._**

I hit the gas pedal to accelerate further. I was vaguely aware of the horns blaring around me as I drove like a mad man. I didn't care at this point if I got a ticket or arrested for speeding. The only thing running through my mind was the big reveal Tanya had made to me as I looked at her for what I can only hope to God would be the last time.

She had never needed me. Our entire relationship was a lie...every second and every touch. I could feel my stomach twisting and churning with the bile I was fighting down. I was physically sick from the knowledge of being used and being so stupid for having believed every second of it. And worse for having been robbed of eight months! If I hadn't had that wench in my life I would have been with my family... Alice...who would of led me to Bella.

I was thoroughly pissed now that I had thought of it that way.

The further away I got the more I found it easier to breath. I tried a few cleansing breaths but was assaulted by the scent of Chanel no.5, I gripped the steering wheel harder and clenched my jaw. I was sick all over again. I hated that smell! I hated the woman who wore it and all she stood for. I didn't want her scent invading my space.

I hit the button for my window and allowed the outside air to wash over my face. However I didn't give the desired effect I was hoping for. Instead, her scent was blowing into my face harder now. It must have been all over my shirt from her hug. I nearly wrecked the car trying to shake the memory of her arms anywhere near my body.

I pulled off at the next exit and parked at a gas station. I went to my trunk and grabbed my gym bag. I tore open the zipper and grabbed whatever marathon momento was in there. I took the shirt I had on previously and slammed it in the garbage can nearest me.

When I turned back to my car, I noticed a blond woman in her early twenties giving me an appreciative stare. I returned her stare with disgust and she quickly turned to walk in the store. What the hell is wrong with people?! I began to think I was surrounded by a bunch of nymphos but then I pieced together where I was and what I had done. I guess stripping down in a gas station parking lot may have been a bit forward.

When I got back on the road I decided to keep the windows down. I didn't want to chance that wretched smell lingering in my seats.

When I arrived at my parents home I was hit with a sense of calm. This is why I wanted to be here right now. Something about being able to come home and just be, was comforting.

I let myself in, calling for my mother and father. The house was quiet as I walked from the foyer to the kitchen. I looked out to the patio and saw my mother was painting by herself out there.

"Hey mom, can I sit with you for a bit?" she turned to me with a sad smile on her face and nodded. I knew she was still upset with me but I wanted to let her know about my day and all the new developments that had come about.

I went to her and hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek. I took in a deep breath as she squeezed my shoulders as to get me to relax.

I sat at the patio table adjacent to her and began fingering the design of the wraught iron table. It was quiet for a few minutes while she went back to her art and I went back to my thoughts. I was just at the part where Bella had asked me if I was still with Tanya when my mother broke the silence.

"Edward, how are you feeling about things today?" She kept her eyes on her painting but had stopped adding to the canvas. She was nervous but why I'm not sure. Maybe she was nervous I hadn't done anything since my break down last night or maybe she was nervous I had and that I had stayed with Tanya.

"I'm not so good mom. I've made a real mess of things and I'm lost at how to make them right. I spoke with both Bella and Tanya this morning. Neither went as I had hoped...but Tanya is gone at least."

I ran my hands through my hair and took a deep breath. I wanted to tell her everything that had happened that morning, but I knew how angry she would become once she heard all of the Tanya debacle.

"hmmm....I cant imagine Bella being too thrilled to see you after that little show you put on last night with Tanya. It couldn't have been easy for her Edward. I'm sure you got what you deserved from her. But tell me why the discomfort from speaking with Tanya? Did she demand a ring from you now that she's met us all?"

I grimaced as I heard the sarcasm dripping from my mother. If there was one thing about her you could count on, it was that she would always give it to you straight when it mattered most.

She rose from her stool and went inside for a couple of minutes. I didn't have the guts to follow her, so when she came out with a glass of wine and what I hoped was a scotch for me, I knew she was gonna dive in.

She sat down with me at the table and placed our drinks neatly in front of us.

"I think we both need to calm our nerves if were going to have this conversation, Edward." I took a sip of my scotch, inhaled a deep breath and began.

"This morning I went to see Bella. We talked briefly about our situation and I tried assuring her I wanted her and only her. I knew it was going to take more than just an apology and I was _**and still am **_willing to do whatever she needs me to do to prove my faithfulness to her. But...she...well she said she couldn't do it."

I could feel the pain threatening to rip from my chest and devour me whole. I felt empty. Like I had no life force at all. I deserved it. I'd caused it.

"Edward, did you really think that just mere hours after that horrid display last night she would be willing to take you back with open arms? Really?" My mother gave me a look that was that of both shock and frustration. I could feel myself shrinking in my seat.

"No I didn't think that, I just wanted her to know that I wanted her. That despite my mistake I still came for her. I figured it was better than staying away." I said the words quietly defeated.

"Edward, I want you to listen to everything I have to say to you. Please don't interrupt, just please focus." I nodded to her and sat back.

"I don't know how things came to be for you and Tanya and quite frankly I don't care. I consider myself a good judge of character and...sweetie you really dropped the ball on that one. She is everything wrong I have ever told you about. I've raised you and Alice to be conscious of the people you surround yourself with. And I know I raised you to be a better man than the one who showed up to dinner last night." She took a deep breath to continue.

That hurt. I kept my eyes on the ground. I wasn't able to look her in the eye. She just continued on anyway.

"We've seen so little of you over the last year. Your father told me it was the hours and for the most part I believed it. I remembered the early years of when we first were married and he was so drained from the work, but then when we did see you...you had no excitement...no fire in your eyes. I figured maybe the stress was taking a toll on you and that you needed a break from the stress. I was wrong."

She leaned fore ward and grabbed my hand.

"Sweetheart you were so lost. I could tell, I'm your mother. No one wants to see the people they love most hurting...but there you were...in pain. But something changed in you a few weeks ago.

You came home without us having to beg...you had that fire in your eyes and you were constantly day dreaming. I knew you had found what was evading you."

I listened to my mothers description of me and was numb. She wasn't saying anything I hadn't known but it was still hard to hear.

"Mom, I know all that you just said is true. I wont deny that I dropped the ball with Tanya...and I know that Bella's altered me from the man I was. But it doesn't change the fact that she doesn't want me anymore."

She took a deep breath and nodded.

"Maybe your right. But maybe your wrong." My head popped up and I could see the look on her face was holding something back.

"Mom...do you know something that I don't? Is there something your not telling me?"

I watched her face carefully now to see if I could get a read on her eyes. She had a careful expression and then began again.

"I'm just saying that you wont know unless you exhaust all your options. Pride cannot be an issue when it comes to love, Edward. Sometimes we have to swallow it and thank God that he gave us a big enough throat to do it."

I took those words for what they were. Wisdom. I grinned lazily to her and nodded. I would do it. I would lay it all on the line to get her back in my arms and me in her heart. I would spare nothing to do it.

"Where's dad at? I want to speak to him and apologize again." Her eyes went wide for a second and then she grabbed her wine and took a drink. Immediately little red warning flags went off all around me.

"Where is he mom? Whats going on?" she closed her eyes and exhaled.

"Well he went into the city for some last minute supplies we needed for our picnic celebration, but ended up getting a house call for a friend of the family." It sounded true...but it also sounded forced. So I decided to dig a bit further.

"Who needed him to come by?"

Now she just looked worried. She began to fidget with her paint shirt and move around the flowers on the patio table.

"Mom...what happened?" I could feel my nerves tightening in every muscle of my body.

"Alice called him...I think...that...well Bella fainted."

"WHAT!?" I felt as if somebody had a strong hold on my lungs and was pulling tighter and tighter in the opposite direction I was going. My Bella was hurt. She did look off this morning but I just assumed it was after all that had happened last night. Shit...last night.

She must have been so stressed and tired. That's never a good combination.

I jumped up and headed toward the door to leave. My mothers hand stopped me by pulling my shoulder.

"Oh no you don't. You may very well have been the cause of her little mishap this morning and I wont have you going over there upsetting her further. Your father has been to see her and said she is fine. She's resting and taking it easy and I don't want you to disturb her, understand?

I exhaled loudly and nodded in agreement. She was right. I probably was the reason she fainted...but there were multiple reasons one could faint and they were all currently running through my head as I stood on that patio with my mother.

"I'm going to go lay down in my old room for a bit." She was hesitant at first like she didn't believe me but went ahead and turned back to her painting as I headed up stairs.

I lay down in my old room and closed my eyes. I was exhausted but I couldn't sleep. Thoughts and images of Bella assaulted me behind my eyes.

I let my memories go back to our first night together...our first time together.

* * *

**_(How we Met part II)_**

After dinner and our parking garage moment, I drove Bella home. I stole glances of her out of the corner of my eye. She was beautiful.

Her eyes were shut and she had a slight smile hinting at her lips. I wanted to kiss her again and see if I could get her to smile fully for me.

I knew it was wrong for me to want her, but I wanted her anyway. I had never been in a situation like this and I had certainly never entertained the idea of cheating with or on anyone. But the way Bella had come into my world tonight I couldn't deny the way I felt. I would break all my rules for her.

I saw the Atrium building on my left and silently cursed the short ride I had given her. I needed more time.

"You can park in the garage here. I have two spots."

I nodded and saw that I had an opportunity to dig in and find a little bit more about her.

"So you live alone then? I mean if you have the extra spot I mean."

I felt stupid already. Great. Since when do I get nervous?

"Yeah, it's just me here. I'm not too big on living with roommates. I had my share in college. I grew up alone and I found that I really missed the peace in it."

I knew all too much about that. I cringed mentally at the thought of having _her_ back in my home again. Whoa bad train of thought back to Bella.

"Yeah I know what you mean. I'm relieved to be alone again myself." SHIT! Why the hell did that come out of my mouth. I just opened a door and now I had to hope she wouldn't walk in.

But she just wiped her fee and walked right through.

"So you live alone too? No roommates?" I knew where she was going with this. I Needed to find a way around it without lying

I had every intention of making things right once I got home so that I wouldn't have to worry about anything other than just simply being with Bella. Always.

"Umm no....I had one a few months ago, but they moved out. So now its back to just me again."

It was vague, I didn't give her the knowledge of male or female and I didn't want her to ask. Either way they were gone now and that's what mattered. Right?

Her brow furrowed slightly and she seemed to be dissecting what I had said but she eventually pushed past it. I could only guess it made sense or appeased her either way.

"Here ...that's my car. Park to the right of it." I saw she was pointing at a small silver Volvo C30. I grinned widely to her and winked. She blushed and looked down at her lap and bit her bottom lip.

Everything Bella did captivated me. I had never met or been around any woman who could make me mad with need by just simply biting her lip. I shook my head and reached for her cheek.

"Why are you shy all of a sudden?" She opened her mouth to speak but shut it and shook her head smiling a little.

"Nothing, come on lets go up." I jumped out of the car so that I could get to her side before she opened the door. She was just undoing her seat belt as I made my way to her.

I walked beside her and grabbed her hand. I felt the electric hum again and relished it. The burn in my body was back and It was making the feat of walking nearly impossible.

We made our way into the elevator and as the doors closed I felt the hum turn into a full fledged tingling sensation. I swallowed hard trying to fight the urge to take her again in my arms and assault her lips with my own.

It was as if our bodies were pulling together without direction or knowledge. I wanted to feel bad about the way I felt toward her, but I couldn't find it anywhere in me to be repentant. All the same I needed to behave better. I didn't want to end up going too far and having to do damage control later. I wanted better for Bella. She deserved the best of everything. Especially from me.

When we reached her floor I ushered her out of the elevator first and kept my hand on the small of her back. It felt so good there...like it was made especially for my hand to be placed. I started wondering if there were any other places on her body that would feel that way for me.

I bit back a groan and shook my self out of that thought. I needed to focus.

As she approached her door I was in the middle of an internal crisis. I wanted to go in...I wanted to leave. I wasn't sure if I could handle being in her home surrounded by her lovely scent...near a bed...couch...closed door...counter...table...well anything that would allow me to take her and claim her in peace and away from prying eyes.

She opened the door and turned to me. I was about to excuse myself for the evening and high tail it out of there when she turned the power of those beautiful brown eyes on me. I was still drowning in them when she spoke.

"Thank you for dinner, Edward. I had such a great time getting to know you." I felt a pull to her just like when we were in the elevator. Except this time I knew I wouldn't have to stop unless she wanted to.

I started to close the small distance in between our bodies and reached out to cup her face. I meant for it to stop there, but my body was moving on its own accord right now. I was just a vessel.

She looked from my eyes to my lips and then bit her bottom lip into her mouth. If I thought it had turned me on before...it was nothing compared to seeing it within the distance of a bed.

I pulled her face to meet mine in the middle and then unleashed the fury of passion that had been building all night. I kissed her and thought of her beautiful face as she walked up to our table. I traced her bottom lip with my tongue and thought of the beautiful way she thanked me for wanting to know her. I kissed her with every emotion I had that evening and it was still not enough.

I wanted more. I needed more.

When our tongues began to taste and tease each other I knew that this wouldn't be enough either. I craved more. So I began to search for it.

My hands moved from her face to her hips. I began stroking her hip bones in small tender circles and earned a moan from her. It was my greatest reward to date. I was about to see if I could elicit another moan but I was stilled by her actions.

She reached on her tip toes and searched for my ear. She found it and began licking and nipping just below the lobe. My eyes were clamped so tightly shut and my mouth was hanging open like a Venus fly trap...but I could have cared less. I was so turned on by this woman I would have gladly made that face forever as long as it meant she kept on nipping and licking.

I thought I was in heaven. I was wrong, I'd simply been strolling up the walk way to reach the gates.

She was still on her tip toes when she whispered so low into my ear that I had to lean in to hear her fully.

"Edward, I don't think I can let you just leave like this." lick. "I think I would rather you stay with me a while." suck. "Can you stay a while Edward?" She took my lobe in between her lips and began to gently bite and suck. I could hear her mouth working on me and as goose bumps erupted over my skin. I was more than enjoying every second of it.

I was so entranced with this woman before me that I couldn't remember why I had wanted to go. So I didn't.

I scooped her up into my arms and she wrapped her legs around me tightly. I felt like a dying man being granted life again. I wanted more.

I gently kicked the door closed with my foot and locked it behind me. Bella was secure in my grasp and was now working on my other lobe. I was on the verge of orgasm already and we hadn't even gotten undressed yet.

I had gone too long without this feeling. Actually just without sex. Because what I was feeling now was foreign to me. I had never felt so intense with a woman, I needed to feel more of her.

I didn't know where to go and Bella must have realized it because she let her legs go slack from my waist and was now leading me down the hall with her hands. The apartment was still dark but the large windows that held a view of the city lights allowed us to navigate without harm.

When we reached her bedroom, she began pushing me back toward her bed. I complied and sat down. She bent down as if to take her shoes off but I reached out to stopped her.

Wordlessly I picked her up and placed her on the center of the bed. The room held the same large paneled windows and the city lights once again were helping illuminate the view before me.

Her eyes were heavy lidded and lust filled. She was too beautiful. I pulled her leg onto my shoulders and removed her shoe. I repeated the action to her other leg as well. Her toes were pointed and they looked so fragile. I placed gentle kisses on her ankles and began to move up her thighs.

When I reached the hem of her stalkings I gently peeled them from her body. She seemed to be getting anxious after that and so was I. slightly turning her, I unzipped her dress and she rose to her knees so that I could pull it over her head. I flung it through the air with little interest for it anymore.

The view before me left me breathless. Bella was wearing the sexiest lingerie my eyes had ever seen. Her bra was a very thin black lace strapless number that had dainty pink bows where her nipples would be. I grew harder just looking at the bows and imagining her nipples that exact color pink.

As she remained kneeling on the bed, my eyes began roaming her body and I saw the rest of her magic piece. The panties were matching black string lace that barely covered her most delicate lips. She began to pull them off but stopped right before her pubic bone was fully visible.

"Edward, could you help me take these off ?" she said in the most innocent way. I nearly came right there.

I gulped down the saliva that was building and nodded. I was already positioned in front of her and reaching to her waist when she began again.

"Do you like my panties, Edward?" My mouth was hanging open again as she said it. "I could keep them on if you do..."

Before I could filter my words they just came out, "I fucking love them, but I want to see you more than your pretty little panties, Bella. I need to see you. "

With her little question she had unlocked a man that was feaning for her body and to claim each part as my own. I pulled her to me and ripped her panties straight off her hips. She gave a little squeak and a giggle as I worked on undoing her bra.

When she was finally laid bare before me I made quick work of my clothes. I picked her up by her hips and she wrapped her legs around my body again...but this time I could feel the moisture that had pooled during our teasing.

I brought my mouth to hers forcefully and she moaned over the action. I felt dainty hands roaming over my body and shivered from the feel of contact that was so innocent.

We were both hungry for the other as we continued to caress and lick everything that we could get at. I still needed more and was now ready to take what she willingly had offered. I gently pulled her down to the mattress and smoothed her hair from her face while looking into her beautiful brown eyes. She seemed to be so content to lay there in my arms and I was more than willing to let her. Always.

"You Isabella, have bewitched me...body and soul. I can't begin to tell you what you do to me but I want to show you...can I show you what you've done to me?" I had whispered it gently to her while gazing into her eyes. I saw they were glossy now. I understood...I too was filling the effects of this moment that had been building all evening since I had laid eyes on her.

With a gentle nod I entered her slowly. As I did I kept my eyes locked on hers. When I was fully in her I dropped my head to the crook of her neck so that I could gather composure from the sensation. She was so warm and wet. I could feel myself throbbing in her core. She began to rock her hips up to build friction and I gladly returned the gesture.

"Oh god....mmm, Edward. You feel so good in me." she breathed the words out in a gentle tone as she lifted her hips off the mattress to meet each thrust. I was now deeper than before and I could feel her warm, wet walls surrounding my cock. I felt like I was being caressed by her body with each thrust of my hips.

I had definitely never been here before. My lips had made their way from her neck to her lips and I couldn't help the urgent way I kissed her and nibbled at her mouth. She was perfection to me, and this moment we were sharing was making it abundantly clear that I could not be without her.

"Oh God, Bella. So good....so fucking good." It was all I could get out of my mouth at the moment. But what came next was straight from my heart.

"Bella, oh god.....I need you, only you. I want only you. Your mine now." I thrust deeper and deeper feeling her walls begin to tighten around my cock. "Say It Bella! I need to hear you say it!" I was so tightly wound from emotion and lust that I was teetering on the edge of an explosion.

"Ugh! .....Edward!...... Oh God!!!.... Yes, Yours.....Only yours! I was pounding into her now and bringing it home. I wanted to hear more sweet moans from her pretty lips but I couldn't hold off anymore. I brought my hand down to where we were joined and began furiously rubbing her. I felt her body spasm and her walls contract as she milked my body for all it had.

I spilt into her beautiful body and shook with the intensity of it all. I was in heaven as I collapsed on her chest. My breathing so hard and stained from our joining. I peppered her chest with gentle kisses and caressed her body with as much tenderness I could muster.

"I'm yours, Edward. I'm whatever you want me to be. Only yours." I felt pure and utter bliss at the thought of no one else having her like this but me from now on and I replied with a deep passionate kiss to her lips as I cradled her face.

**knock knock knock**

I was startled from my memory with the knocking on my bedroom door. I sat up and shook myself from the memory.

"Come in." I was still rubbing my eyes, trying to purge the thoughts so not to torture myself but stilled when I heard my fathers voice.

"Son, we need to talk."


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, so I have written these last eight chapters now with the motivation I got from my four reviews! In all honesty I want sure if I should continue...but for you four I will gladly do it! I've named the chapters after songs thats I listened to while writing the chapters for insperation. This Chapter was Sara Barraleis and its called Bottle it up. I heard this song over an over as I completed the chapter...try it out, it may help give you some insight to Bella's emotions at this time. with out any more delay...here's chapter eight. -CCMAJ

**Songs:_Bottle It Up- Sara Barraleis_**

**_ Heal over- K.T Tunstall_**

* * *

**_BPOV (Bottle It Up)_**

Work. That's what I had done to fill the hours in the days and weeks that followed that horrible dinner fiasco and the emotionally draining weekend that accompanied it. But when I had cried my last tear and said my final peace over a bottle of wine that Sunday, I left it where it needed to stay. In the past.

I was no stranger to disappointment. In fact I prided myself on my rebound abilities. This wasn't the first time I had wanted something and didn't get it. Hell this wasn't even the first time I had wanted a guy and didn't get him. I was used to the feeling of disappointment that lingered after.

This was different though. If I was being completely honest with myself then I had to admit that I had fallen very hard for Edward Cullen. Fallen and crash landed that is.

So I did what I always do when something doesn't work out. I worked even harder at the things I did have and was good at. My days and evenings were now full of story layouts and ideas. Brainstorming and focus groups. I woke up, I went to yoga three times a week and then I worked. Hard.

Just over five weeks had gone by now and It was the end of July. Between the late hours and the actual avoidance of home, I hadn't seen Alice very often outside of Yoga. I had taken to staying in the office late and going home around nine at night. By this time Alice had plans to be with Jasper and that left me clear of the hovering and emotional questions she was sure to try and hit me with. I didn't want it.

I wasn't avoiding the pain, I had simply made my peace and put it behind me. There were bigger things to look forward to in my life and I wasn't going to be sidetracked from my goals because of a guy. It just wasn't me.

When I walked in my apartment that Friday night from a grueling fourteen hour day, I went straight to my kitchen and opened a bottle of wine. I went to the fridge and pulled out some cheese and crackers to make a light snack to nibble on while I unwound.

I saw a flash of red from the corner of my eye and turned to see that my phones cradle was signaling I had a message. I went to the phone and hit the button to retrieve it.

"You have one new message" the electronic voice called to me.

I went back to my snack and began slicing cheese and arranging a plate when a familiar voice came across the machine. I stilled myself to listen.

"Bella! This is Carlise Cullen. Sorry to bother you, but I got you number from Alice, I hope you don't mind. I was calling to invite you to a Yale Alumni event coming up. I've been singing your praises to a lot of the members and I think it would be a great opportunity for you to make some wonderful and helpful contacts with your career ambitions. Please give me a call back when you have a free moment. The house number is 847-256-0100. I'm home all this weekend and will be happy to tell you all about it! Til then."

I was standing there eating a piece of cheese and smiling. I hadn't spoken to Carlisle since I had fainted. I was flattered that he would think of me for an event like that and even more touched that he was singing my praises. I didn't know Esme and Carlisle very well, but when I had spoken with them I was left with a very paternal feeling emanating from them. I knew that I didn't want to embarrass or be a source of discomfort in their lives because beyond their kindness they were also extremely loving people.

I took my plate and wine to the living room and sat down on my overstuffed couches. I curled my legs up and reached for my stereo remote. I turned it on and hit shuffle. As the sounds of K.T Tunstall's Heal Over came through the surround sound I couldn't help but smile.

I sat there and sipped my wine and ate my snack. It was odd to me that this song would come on at this moment. It felt like a message or a reminder of sorts that things would keep getting better.

Deep down I still longed for Edward, I think subconsciously I always would. We had gone from nothing to _something_ _major_ after that first night together. And we also went from Major to nothing at the same speed, It wasn't healthy. I had to remind myself of that sometimes when I got weak. It wasn't often but it did happen on occasion.

**********************

The next morning I was pulled from my sleep by a loud knocking on my door. I was fighting against the sound and hoping whoever it was would go away. They didn't.

With a scowl on my face I yanked my covers away and slid on my robe. I made my way down the hall grumpily and with a furrowed brow. I reached the door and looked through the peep hole.

Grrrrr!

It was Alice. I pulled open the door and stared evilly at the chipper pixie in front of me. She just danced on in and smiled brightly.

"Good morning, Bella! I brought you some coffee and a cream cheese danish!" Yeah well she better have if she wanted to live after waking me from the early morning peaceful slumber.

"Alice, what are you doing here so early? I was still sleeping while you were knocking ya know." I still wore a scowl but reached for my coffee anyway.

"Bella, its eleven in the morning. Noon is only an hour away! You should be thanking me for waking you so you wouldn't miss this gorgeous day!

I glanced at the time on the wall and realized she was right. I had been doing this a lot lately. I took a sip of my coffee and reached for my danish. Alice was sitting at the island and picking at her danish as well.

"Thanks for the coffee Ali, I guess I've just been burning the midnight oil too much and its finally catching up with me." I yawned again and that seemed to trigger Alice's need for an outing.

"Okay, now that your up, go and get showered and dressed. Were going to have lunch and catch up a little." She wore a smile and winked at me. I could see in here face that there was nothing else she was planning. I appreciated that. She must have just missed our time together as much as I had.

She didn't even pick clothes for me. And because she didn't demand it, I went ahead and wore a summer dress that she had selected for me weeks before.

With my soft antique style floral print dress on and sandals, we stepped out into the beautiful Chicago summer. It was hot but glorious. I let the sun settle over my skin and took in the serene images around me. Families were out at the parks and enjoying each other. I smiled for them. It is a beautiful feeling to share this...well anything with someone you love.

I wanted to eat at _Rhapsody_ because the Tribune had just given it a fantastic review. We both wanted to sit outside since the weather was just too beautiful to pass up. As we approached the yellow umbrella's outside I smiled wider at the scenery before me. The patio was surrounded by a lush flower garden.

Just as we were about to be seated I heard Alice intake a sharp breath. I turned to her to see what the problem was and quickly found it. Her body was slightly turned and facing a table with two men. One was Jasper and the other was Edward.

Jasper was staring wide eyed toward Alice and I, but Edward was still concentrating on the menu and hadn't seen us. Alice turned to me with a look of shock and horror but I was actually okay. Under any other circumstances I would of assumed she set this up and was trying to fix things but the fact is that I chose the restaurant and she clearly hadn't known they would be here.

"Aren't you going to go say hello to your boyfriend and your brother?" I asked with a gentle smile. I didn't want her to feel like she had to ignore either of them. Edward was her brother after all and Jasper was her boyfriend...I didn't want to ever be a person who drove a wedge through people for my own petty pride.

On top of that, I wasn't sad and I wasn't hurt. To be honest I was fine, there were no tears or stomach aches. When I had told Edward that I forgave him that morning in my living room, I had meant it. I truly didn't blame him. It just simply didn't work out.

"Bella, we don't have to...we can just go if you'd like. Really! I don't mind!" Alice's face was a cross of panic and pain now and it hurt me that she felt that way. I shook my head no and gently pushed her toward Jasper.

"It's fine, Ali. Really it is. We'll both say hello." She smiled at me and grabbed my hand. When we were no more than four feet away Edwards head popped up with a confused look as he took in Jasper's face then turned in the direction he was gawking.

He looked at me in disbelief for a moment and then to Alice. He suddenly snapped back to Jasper looking for some kind of answers. He was just as surprised by our sudden appearance at lunch as well. Several emotions flickered across his face as he looked back to me. Surprise, sadness and relief. I returned his expression with a tender smile.

He was on his feet now and Jasper wasn't far behind him.

"Hey you two, what brings you here!?" Jasper asked the burning question that they all besides myself seemed to be sharing.

I decided to put everyone out of their misery and answered that one myself.

"Well the Tribune just did a review on this place and having read it, I was anxious to have a meal here. So when Ali picked me up, I suggested it." I said it with excitement and contentment in my voice. I wasn't even trying to. I was pleased that I could make this less awkward for us all.

Jasper and Alice seemed to relax with that and Edward was just smiling and nodding. I turned to Jasper to greet him.

"Jasper, how are you? It's been a while hasn't it?" He smiled to me brightly and pulled me into a gentle embrace and kissed my cheek like he had when we first met.

"You've been a busy woman lately, Bella. I'm just glad you remember my name!" He was chuckling and smiling brightly and I could feel the mood lighten fully now.

"Would you two like to join us? We haven't ordered yet and we do have room." Edward asked the question with a hint of hesitation and I smiled at the fact he was trying to be relaxed when he was clearly uncomfortable. I realized that everyone was looking only to me for an answer so I nodded yes again with enthusiasm.

We all sat down and settled our selves from the tense moment we had just pushed through. I decided that I wasn't going to let anyone feel awkward because of me or the past, so I spoke up for every ones benefit to get the conversation rolling.

"I read great things about the grilled cheese here!" They all popped their heads up from their menus to look at me as I kept going, "I know it sounds childish but its made with three different cheeses and sauteed onions...I think I'm gonna try it. It comes with a cup of soup too!"

Edward was smiling widely again and chimed in. "I think that's a great choice! Sounds just like what I need as well. I'm gonna try it too." I laughed and went back to the menu to peruse again. The waitress came and asked for our drink orders and as she took our meal selections we were faced with now another awkward moment. Well I was anyway.

"So there will be two separate checks correct?" She gestured to Jasper and Alice as one check and then to Edward and myself. Jasper nodded yes for him and Alice but Edward and I spoke at the same time. "No" I said, just as Edward stated, "Yes"

I shook my head no again to the waitress so that she would see my request clearly. "No, I'll be separate from everyone at the table. Thank you." She turned to Edward with a raised eyebrow in question to my response. I turned to him as well and gave a tight smile. He exhaled loudly and nodded, sending her on her way without any objection.

I wasn't trying to hurt his feelings but I just wouldn't of felt comfortable with it. Especially since the conversation about him paying the first time we went out together. It was suddenly too intimate a thing to share with him.

He didn't say anything else about it and we all went back to our light conversations. Jasper and Alice were both curious as to what I had been up to lately seeing as they hadn't seen much of me over the past five weeks.

I told them about the paper and how I had been working long hours. I turned to Edward to make sure he felt included in the conversation but when I did there was worry etched on his face. I kept on about the long days and mounds of work I had been buried in and his expression became worse.

I hoped he wasn't feeling left out because I really was making all the effort to include him so I decided to turn the conversation to Jasper. I hadn't learned about him much outside of what Alice had told me and I wanted to get to know him better.

I found out that Jasper is a lawyer for an elite firm here in Chicago and was doing his best to earn a position as a partner one day. He didn't speak much of his family and I didn't ask. I figured if anyone was interested in talking about their families they would and if they didn't they wouldn't. Well that's how I was anyway.

When our food came we all compared meals. Edward, gave me a high praise on suggesting the grilled cheese and I giggled at the sight of him attacking it like a last meal. For the rest of the hour it was back and forth banter between Jasper and Edward. I couldn't help laughing at everything these two threw at each other.

All was going so well and I was relieved to be in such a good place with everything that had happened. I was even more relieved to have such a comfortable relationship as friends with Edward. Well at least the hopes of a friendship with him. It was only a group lunch after all.

As the checks came out the laughter came to an end. We all reached in for our bill to settle payment. When I reached for my purse, I was surprised to feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Isabella Swan?" My brow was furrowed and confusion was clearly written all over my face as I sought to locate that familiar voice. When I finally saw the face I was stunned to say the least.

"Oh my goodness! Paul!" I jumped from my seat and wrapped my arms around him. He was still tall and just as muscular as I had remembered. His handsome face was just as sculpted as the day I had last seen him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me off my feet into a tight embrace.

"How are you sweetheart!? I cant believe I found you again after all this time." He was clearly as happy to see me as I was to see him. I heard the longing in his voice in that last statement and it hit a place in me that I had closed off weeks ago. I hadn't realized how good it felt to know I was missed and longed for.

Tears were welling in my eyes as he placed me on my meet and I was fighting to keep them back, but It was a losing battle.

"Paul, It's really you. What are you doing here? Where did you come from?" Tears were running down my face freely now and he cradled my face to wipe them away with his thumbs. His face was lit with a warm genuine smile as he attempted to keep pace with my tears.

"Well, after graduation I was offered a job in Alaska. I was out there not even a full week from the day I received my diploma. I tried to email you and call but none of the information I had for you was valid anymore. I even went as far as contacting the Alumni Association to see if you were listed with them, but no one had anything tangible for me. I literally looked for like four months...but nothing."

I was totally shocked and silent now. He tried to find me. He searched for a way to contact me for four months. I was lost for words.

"Look at me monopolizing you from your company. How rude of me." He turned toward the table and addressed Edward, Jasper and Alice. "I'm sorry for interrupting your meal and time with her, but when I saw her I just had to come and say hello. Please forgive me." His words were sincere and he seemed to be a little embarrassed as he looked at Edward. He must have thought we were together.

Alice spoke up with a smile on her face. "That's okay, Paul was it?" He nodded his head yes and made his way around the table to greet her. I realized how awkward everyone looked and I felt horrible for not introducing everyone myself. Heat made it's way to my face as I went to Paul's side.

"Paul let me introduce you to my friends. This is Alice, her boyfriend Jasper and her brother Edward. Everyone, this is my friend Paul." Paul greeted them and shook hands with the guys. As he went for Edwards hand I noticed the expression on Edwards face. He seemed to be sick or something because his face was pained and resigned.

Jasper seemed torn between talking to Paul or tending to Edward because his face kept shooting back from Paul to Edward in slow and calculated moments but finally settled on speaking to Paul.

"So how is it you two know each other? " Jasper and Alice both seemed to be curious as to that and Paul stared chuckling.

"Well that is a long story, but the cliff notes are that we attended Yale together." Everyone was still as interested as they were when they didn't know that... so I decided to take the reigns.

"Paul have a seat, were just settling the bill's here but I'm sure we can tell the short version by the time the waitress has everything squared away." I moved over my chair as he grabbed one from an empty table near by and sat next to me. The table was only meant for four so it was a tight squeeze.

Paul Began, "Well Bella and I both attended Yale obviously, but we didn't have any classes together. Actually we didn't even live near each other. However we both used the same library and every day I would see her in there reading or writing with her headphones on. I used to get a kick out the way she would scold a page or scowl at a question she couldn't figure out. One day we were both studying late and we literally closed the place down. When we were both told it was time to leave, we made our way out together... That day I met the one girl who would end up haunting my very young life."

He turned to me with a bright smile and squeezed my arm before continuing.

"Anyway, I was obviously taken with her from the moment I spoke with her. I mean what's not to love right? But she wouldn't hear of it. She had it in her head that dating and fun of any kind was to be put aside until she had that degree in her hand. So basically I stalked her. For four years."

I rolled my eyes and slapped his arm.

"Paul, you goof! You did not stalk me...annoy me yes, but stalk....no. I would have definitely had you arrested." I winked at him and picked up the story.

"So we became friends who met at the library daily and studied. Except that night we had met, I was walking to my dorm and was stopped by some random group of guys. They were frat guys and were drunk of course. Anyway they weren't leaving me alone so when Paul came up to run interference I was more than appreciative of his help. He walked me home and from then on continued to every night until we graduated."

I nodded my head in finality. But now Paul was rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

"Bella, really? Is that really how you remember it? I'm hurt!" He feigned a heart pain and bit his lip.

"Bells, I asked you out everyday for four years. And you turned me down every time, every single time."

I chuckled now.

"Paul, I had goals and was not about to mess them up with dating the resident playboy of Yale University."

He hugged me again and kissed my temple. I was very aware of all the eyes on us at that moment and realized we had been talking non stop. I blushed again at the spectacle I must have made and dropped my gaze to the table.

Just then the waitress came for our checks and upon seeing my holder as the only one with cash went to grab it first. She was stopped short by Paul though.

"Bella, is that yours?" His hand was on the holder now too. I wore a weary face and nodded.

"Oh no you don't!" He scolded and shook his head. "I told you years ago that when in my presence you will not be paying for anything." He handed the waitress a larger bill and stated no change. She didn't even wait to see if I was okay with it and grabbed everyone Else's to close.

My mouth was hanging open and my face was in shock. Paul, turned to me and winked with a cocky grin plastered on his face and I couldn't help the grin that escaped me. I shook my head and let it go.

The waitress returned and we all stood to leave. I went to gather my things and caught sight of Edward. He was sitting still with his hands in his hair and his eyes closed.

"Edward?" I asked gently. I made to touch his shoulder as he looked up and opened his eyes to me.

"Are you okay?" I was concerned now. He truly looked sick to his core and I worried about him getting home.

"Not right now okay, Bella?" His voice was low and gentle and his eyes were sad. The words weren't mean or angry, but low and pained. I nodded to him and turned to face the rest.

"Bella, are you living here in Chicago?" Paul looked as if he were about to jump out of his skin as he waited for my reply and I couldn't help but chuckle at his expression.

"Yeah, I'm not too far from here, I work at the Tribune." He smiled brightly again and pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back with just as much force. It was great to see him again, we had shared so many wonderful things together.

"Well, I just moved here not even three weeks ago. I'm brand new and need some help getting settled. What do you say I make you my new tour guide?" His face was shining brightly and he was almost giddy with excitement.

"Sure, Paul. What are friends for?" I winked at him and chuckled again.

"Great! Well...here's my card. My cell's on the bottom there so don't lose it! What do you say to dinner and a show this Friday? _Wicked_ is playing and I remember you reading and loving the book... well that is if you haven't seen it a hundred times already!

He was sounding nervous now but I just didn't get why. He never had a hard time just talking to me before.

"Sure, that sounds like fun! I'll call you later today okay?" I reached out and hugged him again and he kissed my temple once more.

"Perfect! Now I do have to go...I'm meeting my colleague here and I want to make sure I'm sitting there being intimidating when he walks in! I'll be waiting for your call, Bella!" And with that he turned and walked away to his table.

I felt like I had just taken a ride in a time machine. My head was light and I couldn't seem to focus very well. For one thing, Paul had just waltzed back into my life and I couldn't have been more thrilled! He was always so wonderful to me and I didn't realize how much I had missed him until I saw him just now.

When I turned back to tuck my chair in, I saw that Jasper and Alice were both quiet and wore polite smiles. It was odd...we had all just been laughing and joking and now if felt like everyone was so tense. I became uneasy for the first time that afternoon and I didn't want it to continue.

"Well, I'm going to go now. It was great seeing you Jasper...and you too Edward." I had turned to face him and saw that his eyes were focused on the table. He looked horrible. I had a feeling my presence was making him uncomfortable so I wasn't about to linger.

"Alice, I'm gonna head home now. Thanks for dragging me away to have a life! I'd probably still be sleeping right now if it weren't for you."

I gave her a big smile and she gave a big one back and nodded, "Your welcome, Bella. Don't be a stranger to me...I miss you. I'll call you later okay? I'll help you pick out something to wear for the show."

I rolled my eyes, laughed and waved to them as I turned to exit the patio. Half way to the gate I saw Paul with his colleague and couldn't help the big smile that spread through my face as he winked at me and motioned with his hands for me to call him.


	9. Chapter 9

_****Notes****_

_Okay, so I had a good time writing this chapter. I don't want people to get upset with this one because it's a little more low key than the other's however, I felt it was time for Edward to have some redemption. This in no way has him out of the woods but at least he's found out how to make fire. Anyone who's seen Cast Away know's how important that is. ;)_

_Enjoy! And if you have some ideas for these two...drop a line._

_-CC_

**EPOV (The Hardest Part)**

I sat in my car with my head in my hands. I was torn on what my next move should be.

Currently I was sitting in front of Bella's building. I wanted to go to her right now and just pour my heart out, but only one thing was running through my mind as I sat there.

I hate Paul. That pretty much sums it up.

Not that difficult to comprehend if your me. He'd sat next to her, touched her, kissed her and then asked her out on a date all within a matter of minutes.

The worst part was sitting there silently and enduring it all. I watched her jump into his arms. I saw him cradle her face and wipe her tears. I was literally on the verge of my own when he had kissed her precious temple.

_Mine_, I thought to myself. That was my temple and my face to hold...those were my tears to soothe.

Yes that was the worst part.

But the hardest part...well...that had to be Bella's reaction to it all. A beautiful blush had crept up her creamy chest and blanketed her lovely face. She cried tears of joy when he had held her. She held him back and stayed by his side.

I couldn't even hide my pain. It had to be clearly written all over my face, because right now I was literally falling to pieces on the inside. My stomach was in knots and I could actually feel the food trying to make its way back up my throat.

It didn't help that he wanted to shake my hand. I had to force myself to do it. What I wanted to do was rip it off his body and let it stand as a representative of what would happen to any other man who attempted to touch her again.

But I couldn't. This was all a repercussion of my deceit and selfishness. I needed to endure this much for her, it was the least I could do.

Just sit here and shut up, I thought. I kept my eyes on my plate and found that if I was very careful with my breaths I could actually stay calm. I could feel Jasper's eyes on me and I glanced to him for some kind of comfort.

Unlike mine, his face was smooth and showed no emotion. I silently begged him with my eyes to please make this all end. I needed to get the hell out of there before I lost it. I didn't think Bella would appreciate me hitting "Paul".

Jasper seemed torn as to what to do. I knew he liked Bella and thought highly of her. He knew just as much about her as I did because of Alice. When I saw him look back to Alice I knew I was alone. He was my best friend, but Alice was his world.

Alice had not been very forgiving about the incident with Bella. I couldn't blame her. She was her best friend and had introduced us. She was just as invested in Bella's happiness as much as Bella herself was and I had betrayed them both. It had been five weeks and Alice had only ever spoken to me out of courtesy and obligation at family gatherings. Our relationship was strained to say the least.

As I'd sat there and listened to _their_ story, I took stock of just how strong a person Bella actually was. I mean I had always known that she was strong, but the depths of it were never clearer to me than at that moment.

Now having been face to face with this Paul character I realized just how much pain she must have been in that night. It killed me all over again now that I had experienced just a small fraction of the wretched feelings she must have felt. This man was simply a friend. Granted he was a friend who harbored romantic feelings for her, but still he was just a friend nonetheless.

Every touch or glance he gave her felt like a lick of wet leather to flesh. I wanted to stand up and scream or yell for it to end. There was no price or bargain I wouldn't make with God or Satan himself at that moment.

It couldn't get any worse in my mind. But again...I was wrong.

Paul grabbed Bella's bill and replaced her cash with a larger bill. Before she could protest he told the waitress no change. Any person who's ever served knows you don't turn down a large tip, so it didn't surprise me when she grabbed the rest of our checks and fled the table.

But what _did_ surprise me was Bella's reaction. She didn't protest or even pout. No, she grinned at him and let it go.

Now I was really sick. Hadn't I just offered to pay for her when we arrived? She shut me down faster than I could form a response. Why would she let this Paul treat her and not me?

Instantly I was angered with the idea that she preferred his attention to mine. I couldn't breath anymore and the air trapped in my lungs seemed to be fighting release. I clamped my eyes shut from the scenes before me. when suddenly I felt a hum of electricity run through my body and I let myself look up.

Bella was standing beside me with her hand on my shoulder. She asked me if something was wrong and I instantly felt sicker. Did she really not know that I was dying there while she carried on with that man? How could she not know?

Which brings me back here to the front of her building. I had been here many times over the last few weeks, but I had only made it as far as the elevator before I would turn around and leave.

I kept showing up with the intention of seeing her and making her understand, but every time I got to that elevator I would become sick with worry that she wouldn't want to hear it and that I would have to concede defeat.

At least this way I got to float down that lonely river called, Denial. But it had run its course and I had reached the end. Today's impromptu lunch date had made that abundantly clear. If I were to have any chance at a future with Bella then I needed to act on it, because there were plenty of men out there just like Paul ready to stake a claim on her themselves.

So this was it, I stepped into the elevator and hit the big white five that seemed to be mocking me. As the ding announced my arrival I took one last deep breath and stepped forward. While I approached her door the queasiness began to build deeper and deeper in my stomach.

_Get it together Cullen_! I mentally scolded myself for acting like such a coward. Behind that door was Bella and if I was sure of anything in this world it was that she was supposed to be with me. With that thought firmly in place I lifted my fist to knock.

I could hear steps moving toward me on the other side of the door and I knew it was Bella. The hum of electricity was beginning to make it's presence known as the steps grew nearer and nearer. When the door opened I not only saw but heard her breath hitch. She looked as if she had just seen a ghost.

"Edward?" Her brow was furrowed with confusion written plain across her face.

"Bella, I-I uh was hoping we could talk for a minute if that's okay? I promise it wont take long."

She blinked her eyes a few times before nodding slowly and stepping aside for me to enter. To say I was nervous was an understatement. My entire future depended on whether or not I could get across the facts to her, if I did we could begin fresh and if I didn't...well I didn't have a plan for that outcome.

She was still wearing what she had on at lunch except she was barefoot now and her hair was thrown up into a messy bun. She looked even more beautiful to me because it was moments like this when she was vulnerable that made her sexiest.

The door shut behind me as I stood in place waiting for her to dictate where to go.

"Edward, is everything okay? Are you alright? You didn't seem like you were feeling well at lunch." She moved to step toward me and then stopped herself. She bit her bottom lip and dropped her gaze to the floor.

I was feeling better already. She cared...she didn't hate me. And to top it off, she bit her lip. I love both her lips, but that bottom one will always have a special place in my heart. I was instantly longing to run my tongue across it once more.

_FOCUS_! I needed to get this out. Then I needed to make sure she understood.

"Um, well that's actually why I'm here, Bella. I wanted to talk with you about everything that happened a while ago and explain my behavior. I just wanted to do this in person, because I don't want there to be any misunderstandings on anything."

She took a deep breath to exhale loudly. Her cheeks were puffy with air as she nodded her head in agreement.

"Can I get you something to drink? Water, soda, juice? I have that lemonade you like..." She trailed off and her blush crept up her face. I couldn't help but smile at that. Was she embarrassed for having the juice I liked here or for remembering the juice I liked? Either way worked for me...It made the heartache that had consumed me moments ago that much lesser.

"Lemonade sounds perfect...thank you." I gave her a big smile as she went to the kitchen. I followed after her because for one I was drawn to her like a magnet. Secondly I couldn't bare to be away from her a second longer.

I sat down at the Island and watched her move about the kitchen for a Glass and then the juice. She looked so beautiful. Even doing mundane tasks she took my breath away. I knew that I needed this to work because the thought of having to go through a life without seeing these things everyday would surely kill me.

I looked around the room as I waited for her to sit with me and noticed that she had moved some things around. Her laptop that usually sat on her bed was now looking to have found a permanent home in the center island where I sat.

I felt her hand graze my own as she placed my drink in front of me. I inhaled sharply from the shock that accompanied it. I had gone five weeks without the magic of her touch and to be given even just a taste of what that was like made my heart ache harder.

"What's this about, Edward?" She wouldn't meet my eyes and her words were gentle and curious. I watched her face for any signs of emotion but could only see that the grain of the wood on her island where we sat had become the most intriguing thing she had ever seen.

I couldn't help but smile at that. I took a drink and a deep breath and began.

"Bella, seeing you this afternoon was wonderful. I've missed you so much...I can't give the emotions I've had justice. But seeing you today like that...just out of nowhere...It filled my heart.

She remained staring at the wood but her brows were knitted together in confusion. I needed to keep going to make her understand my visit.

"I want you to know that I heard you loud and clear when I was here last. I was listening to everything you said...actually I'm sure I can say it back to you verbatim. It's all I think about. Your all I think about."

"I'm over it, Edward. Its fine." She said it so low that I almost missed it...almost.

Her eye's met mine for the first time and they looked weary. I grabbed on to their hold and used them as a life line to get through what came next.

"These last five weeks have been the worst of my existence. I haven't slept or eaten...when I do dream I dream of you. You haunt me, Bella."

"I want you to know that the morning I left here, I went to Tanya and told her everything. I told her that I had been seeing you for those last six weeks and that she had crashed your dinner and date. I explained how I had no desire to see her again and that was the last moment I ever saw her."

Bella was still staring at me skeptically and with her mouth open slightly. This was good, she was listening at least. I had to keep going though, there was so much more that she needed to know. Before I could pick up again she finally spoke.

"When you left that morning Alice came over. I was still in shock from everything that had happened the night before and from our talk that morning. I had told her that I wanted some answers and that I couldn't speak with you about them yet. But when we sat down to talk about it I couldn't deal with it. I had thought that if I could just hear some answers then I would be at peace...but I wasn't. I fainted from the thoughts and questions I didn't have answers to and I decided after that I didn't want to know."

She said it all in the tone of a whisper. Her gaze had settled upon the wood again and the defeated look I had seen on her face that night was back. I couldn't sit there and let her feel like that again. I wanted her to have her peace.

Suddenly my needs weren't important. The reasons I had come today were no longer valid. All that mattered was taking that pain away and giving her some closure. If that meant I had to live without her by myside then so be it. I would gladly take her friendship and peace rather than force my greedy desires on her.

I had finally understood what my father had told me that night. When he'd spoken of love and how to show it I thought I understood. No, I only comprehended his words. The power behind those feelings were what I was missing at the time and because of it, I had failed to do that next morning what I was setting out to do now. I would now search for and be anything this woman needed me to be as long as she was happy.

"Bella, I will answer all your questions right now. I wont lie or water down my answers. I owe you that and so much more for what you went through. Ask me anything."

I prepared myself. I reached deep down within and grabbed the pair that were hanging beneath Edward Jr. Then she began.

"Well first off, were you sleeping with both of us at the same time?" She looked me square in the eye and braced herself for the worst.

"No" This question was the easiest to answer. I answered immediately and with conviction

"I hadn't been intimate with her in over four months from the time I had met you." I saw her brow furrow at the answer I had given. Her eye's began to tighten and she was starting to shake her head no.

"Bella, I'm telling you the truth. In order to believe it let me tell you the whole story upfront and you can ask all the questions that are left unanswered or that your not satisfied with after... would that be okay with you?"

I figured this would help clear a lot of the questions she would have. She nodded yes but then held up her hand to stop me from continuing.

"Can we go sit on the couch? My back is killing me." She was rubbing her lower back now and making a face that echoed her sentiment.

"Where ever you want, Bella." I stood to follow her to the living room. She continued rubbing at her back at an awkward angle so I moved to her and replaced her hand with mine. I began with firm little circles and kneading the area she was holding before.

I was happy to say the least that she hadn't protested my touch. I just wanted her to feel better.

She went to lay on the long over stuffed white couch near the wall and I grabbed some extra goose downs from the lounger for her. When she was all settled in I took a seat on the floor in front of her.

I told her about Tanya and how we met. I told her what she had "gone through" with James and how I wanted to help her. She heard how I moved her into my home and then into my bed and eventually out with her sister.

Bella, lay quietly on the long couch listening intently to my story. She never interrupted and she wore the same careful face. When I had finally gotten to our meeting each other she closed her eyes. I saw a single tear escape her left eye and trickle to the corner of her cheek.

Without asking or thinking I swept it away. I felt her lean into my touch just a whisper, but I stilled myself to keep my distance. This was about her, not me.

I ended my tale at the Tavern that I had met Tanya to break up at. Bella's eyes were wide now and showing the first real reaction besides the tear to the entire story. She sat straight up and held a look of horror across her face.

"Oh, Edward" She gasped, "That's absolutely horrible!"

I nodded my head in agreement. It was horrible but at the same time how much better was I from Tanya? Didn't I lie to Bella so that she wouldn't leave me?

I had manipulated the trust and no questions asked attitude that Bella had given me and lied to her. Yes, I could no longer deny that I lied to her. Even though she never dug deeper into the excuse I gave her about "helping out a friend" I still kept the fact that "friend" was in fact my girlfriend.

When it was all said and done we sat there in silence. Bella reached out to me and grabbed my hand.

"I'm sorry you had to find out that way." She was whispering it and her voice was strained.

I looked at her and saw that her eye's were holding tears. I couldn't comprehend why she felt bad for me. If she were any other person I would of expected her to say something like Karma's a bitch, but this was Bella. When did she ever do what I expected her to do?

"Bella, your not the one who lied to me. Please don't cry."

She nodded her head and wiped her eye's. When she released my hand I instantly ached for her touch again.

"Where do we go from here, Edward?" I brought my gaze back to hers and took a deep breath.

This is what I had come to do. To find out what our next step would be and if we even had a step left to take. But now faced with the question I was afraid to uncover her answer.

Before I could respond Bella's phone was ringing. She stood to find it and continued rubbing her back as before with a scowl. I couldn't help but smile at how cute she looked when irritated.

"Hello" I heard from the kitchen. I didn't want to eavesdrop so I sat down where she had left and brought her pillow to my face.

I had to fight very hard to keep from groaning out loud. My body began to release tension I didn't know It held. Just breathing in her scent and being in her presence was calming me all over.

Soon the three hours of sleep my body was getting sporadically was wearing off. I closed my eyes and lay back with my feet off to the side. I didn't want to get her white couch dirty.

I figured I would just let her finish her conversation and then we could continue back where we left off...

I awoke to a dark room. I sat up and tried to take in my surroundings but the only lighting I was getting came from the large paneled windows bringing in the city lights.

Oh!

The day came back to me in a rush. I had fallen asleep on Bella's couch waiting for her to get off the phone.

Where was she? I went to stand up and felt that my feet were bare. I looked around and saw my shoes and socks tucked next to the couch by my side.

I smiled to myself. She must have taken them off so I could sleep without getting the couch dirty. I made my way toward the hall to see if she was asleep but I stopped when I heard the faint sounds of a keyboard.

I remembered seeing the laptop and docking console on the island earlier so I figured it was coming from there. I went around the corner and saw that it was indeed a computer and that Bella was there typing away at the island in the dark.

She was wearing a white cotton camisole and what looked to be light blue pajama bottoms. Her hair was visibly wet and up in a messy bun again. She wore her glasses and had a pencil between her teeth. I couldn't help the smile that lit up my face.

"Hey" I said it low so not to frighten her. Her eye's popped up and she let a smile light up her face.

"Hey yourself" She teased

"How's sleeping beauty doing? I was about to go out and find a prince to come break the spell." She was chuckling at me from her stool and leaning on the island while she did it.

I chuckled a little my self. It was a little funny that I had passed out like that, but I was still a bit embarrassed for having done it.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean to crash like that. I just put my head back for a minute so that you could talk in private and I guess my schedule just caught up with me." I shook my head a little trying to play it off but I was more than a little embarrassed now.

"Edward, you work like a mad man most of the time. Don't apologize for being tired. Your a Doctor...it's part of the package ya know? I'm just glad it was here and not in a cab!"

We both laughed freely now and the embarrassment wore off. If she wasn't going to make a big deal about it then neither was I.

"What time is it?" I was rubbing my neck a little while I leaned against the doorway for support.

"It's just after one am. You crashed around four thirty."

Geese, Cullen. Why not bring a suitcase and your toiletries over while your at it. I was back to mentally beating myself again.

"You must be hungry. I made you some dinner...I thought you might wake up while I was cooking, but you didn't. I saved your plate for you in case you might want it." She got up from her stool and turned on the lights.

I flinched from their brightness but she already had the dimmer controls going.

"I don't want to disrupt you, Bella. I know your probably working right now."

She kept moving around the kitchen and turning on the oven while she answered.

"It's no problem, Edward. I really don't mind at all."

I don't know if it was how she said it or if it was the way she was moving around the kitchen, but it was in that instant that I knew no other woman would ever touch my heart the way she did.

I watched her arrange a place for me right next to her on the island instead of at the dining room table in the other room. I was silently praising God that she wanted me near her, even if it was just to eat my dinner. To me the fact was that she had chose to keep me near.

I went to help her but she shooed me away and said that I needed to sit down before I made her klutzy alter ego come out. I laughed a little at the truth in that as I made my way to my seat.

Bella placed a plate with an over sized mushroom and shredded Italian sausage stuffed inside. There was a side salad and some rolls with it. I smiled big at the meal she had prepared. I didn't need to ask if she made it. Bella loves to cook and often made meals like this for the two of us everyday.

My stomach thanked her by growling at that moment. She started laughing again and rubbed my stomach. I automatically tightened up from the feel of her soft hands on me. Even separated by my shirt I could feel the heat of her hand on my skin.

"Eat or that things gonna sing all night!" She said as she went back to her stool.

I ate while she worked. We would occasionally catch each other glancing but neither of us made a comment. When I was finished I stood and made my way to the sink. I rinsed my plate and loaded it in the dishwasher.

When I turned back to Bella, I saw that her laptop was closed and she was watching me intently. I went back to my stool to sit next to her and mirrored her body language.

I didn't know what to say, I wanted to pick up our conversation again but the moment we had been in had passed and getting back to that comfort was going to take work. It was already approaching two am and Bella needed to rest.

"I guess I should be going now..." I let it hang out there to see what she would say. She opened her mouth twice and closed it both times with out having said anything.

I gave a small smile and made to get up.

"Can we talk about things again....sometime soon?" She lightly placed her hand over mine as she asked it. I looked down at our joined hands and smiled.

"Whenever you're ready, Bella. Just let me know and I'll come right over. Do you still have my number?"

She nodded her head yes and I went to the living room to get my shoes.

After I had shoe's and my key's I slowly went to leave. Bella was leaning against her couch, and as I reached the door she called out to me.

"Thank you for telling me everything you did today, Edward. I didn't think it was anything I needed to know but now that I do, I feel truly at peace with everything...just...I...well thank you."

Her voice had dropped to a hush and her gaze once again fell to the floor.

I had given her the closure she needed and now she was at peace. That alone would of made my visit a success but what happened next filled my heart with hope.

Bella closed our distance in two strides and kissed me. It wasn't hungry or frenzied but it held forgiveness and patience and I didn't seek anything more than she would give me. From now on that would be my rule when it came to all things Bella. I would work to give her what she needed from me and when she was ready she would give me what she was comfortable with.

She pulled back and looked me in the eye's. I gave her a gentle smile and said all I could think of, "Thank you".

I was halfway out the door when I heard her say in a steady tone, "And apparently I'm not over it".

I nodded to her and smiled before I shut the door behind me.


	10. Chapter 10

(BPOV)

Two weeks had gone by since I had watched Edward leave my home. I hadn't talked to him or made contact since that night.

I couldn't tell you why I kissed him before he left. Beside the fact that I wanted to and that it felt right was enough to send me into more than one sleepless night. But now I was feeling anxious.

I still wasn't sure what it was I actually wanted. I'm not a grudge holder and I don't like to watch people squirm, so having this huge motza ball out there was a little unsettling.

I had told him before he left that I wasn't over it. It was technically more of a thought spoken aloud than anything else and I was really surprised to hear myself come to that conclusion after weeks of denial set firmly in place.

I had conviced myself that I was over it. I honestly believed that I was. I succeeded in convincing myself, because I didn't try facing it or even talking about it again after that weekend had passed. I threw myself into work and stayed away from the people who would ask anything about it. For the most part it worked.

On the flip side to that coin, I was no longer hiding or deflecting from the past. I felt free now that I had my answers and it made going back to my daily routine that much easier. I no longer avoided home and I managed to get out of my office everyday around five o'clock.

Alice, had come back in the picture in a big way. Being my best friend, she wanted to be able to help me figure out what it was that I wanted. Even though she was still angry with Edward, she assured me of his feelings and even played devils advocate and brought up, Paul.

Paul. Well there was another factor to this mess to consider. Of course it had been years since we had been those confused and stressed out college students who relied on each other. But it was nice to have him back in his old role of friend and jester.

I hadn't been out with Paul yet, aside from a quick lunch during the week. He had some last minute business meetings that kept him busy during the week and on the weekends he was swamped with work to catch up on.

Tonight however, Paul would be accompanying me to the Yale Alumni event that Carlisle had invited me to.

When I had spoken to him about the details, Carlisle insisted I bring either a date or a friend.

"These things can get a little overwhelming, Bella. My suggestion is that you bring someone who you can signal to rescue you if necessary. Esme usually accompanies me...she's a natural at things like that."

I didn't really know what it was I would be facing, so when I had spoken with Paul that day I went ahead and asked him if he wanted to be my wing man. He was more than happy to come along, and was even looking for membership.

Paul was easily the most social person I had ever met. He had always been so outgoing and never had a hard time striking up a conversation with a stranger. We were polar opposites when we had met eight years ago.

That played a huge part in the decision for me not to accept his offers of a date...back then. However, these days I wasn't exactly sure if I woudn't go if he asked me. I was by no means a social butterfly, but I did have a job that required I get information on a personal level at times. I found that being around Paul, even just on our occasional lunch...had opened me up considerably.

With Paul I didn't giggle, I laughed freely. He made me feel sexy and desired. Most days when we met for lunch, I could not only feel but see the difference in my demeanor. He was like a hall pass that excused me from having to answer to authority and just be. I hadn't felt that way, ever.

Paul had become my distraction. A beautiful distratcion, but only a distraction nonetheless.

We made our way into the _Citizen Bar _and went straight to the table with the Yale banner. A young blond woman who looked to be in her early twenties or very late teens was sitting behind it with a bright, happy smile.

"_Welcome! Are you here for the Alumni Mixer?" _I heard Paul chuckling next to me and I elbowed him in the ribs to shut up.

We got our name tags and made our way in. I spotted Carlisle and Esme within seconds. The two were surrounded by a large group of older gentlemen dressed in work suits and jackets. They must have just come straight from the office.

I led the way straight to the two familiar faces with Paul directly beside me.

"Carlisle, Esme! How are you?" I greeted the two just as they were free from the clutches of one of the business dressed men. Esme turned to me and smiled happily.

"Bella Dear, Im so happy to see you!" She gave me a loving squeeze and pulled back to see my face. She had a smile that semed to make her glow.

Carlise embraced me next and kissed my forehead. "Bella, Im so glad you could make it." He gave me a gentle smile and leaned in with a serious look,"You should be able to walk away from this with some very good contacts"

After they had both greeted me, I saw them both turn simultaniously to the man currently smiling down at me with his arm around my waist.

No problem, I just had to make the introduction and make sure it was clear we were only friends.

"Carlisle, Esme...this is my friend Paul. Paul is one of my best friends from Yale." There, that should sate any thoughts of romance.

Carlisle and Esme both had the same welcoming smiles on. I could see that neither was upset by his presence or in any way feeling awkward.

My nerves calmed considerably. Carlisle shook his hand, and Esme gave a gentle kiss on his cheek after introductions.

"Paul, you actually met both their son and daughter the day we ran into each other. Do you remember Alice and Edward?"

Paul had a happy smile as well now. "Oh! yes, I do!" He was nodding earnstly while looking down at me.

"Bella, what do you say we get you introduced to some of the people that are anxious to meet you." Carlisle smiled and led me to a group a few feet away.

I looked back to Paul to make sure he was okay with being alone, but he and Esme were already chatting it up and mingling with a few younger girls that made their way to him. I smiled and turned back to Carlise.

The evening was a success. I had managed to meet many influential people in my line of work, and even got a few offers to come work elsewhere. To say that It was helpful was an understatement. I now had job security and options like never before.

I hadn't realized how prominant a man Dr. Cullen was. He was not only a well sought after surgeon, but his work around the city was extraordinary. He and Esme both gave so much back to the city in donations and scholarships.

By the time Paul and I had walked away from _CitizenBar_ we were ready to call it a night. Socilaizing was actually very tiring work.

Paul drove me home and walked me up stairs. We were both still sharing our stories and comparing contacts when we came around the corner to my door. I was looking up at Paul and describing one of the offers I had gotten, but he had stopped walking and had a worried look on his face. Actually it was a cross from worried to awkward.

I turned to see what the problem was and saw that Edward was standing at my door. He was dressed in scrubs and holding a bouquet of daisies.

I was standing still just like Paul now, except I had a look of shock on my face. Edwards expression mirrored my own.

His face fell, and his head hung.

"I-I'm sorry...I should of called. I'll just um...go" He started to walk away and my face scrunched up in pain.

Paul must of seen it and that's when he spoke up and shocked the hell out of me.

"Um hey man...I-uh...I'm actually gonna go." Paul was looking from me to Edward now, trying to read our faces for a hint as to if that was what we wanted.

I honestly did want to speak with Edward. So I nodded and looked to Edward.

His mouth was hanging open a little as he looked from Paul to me. I could see some very strong emotions running over his face, but I had no idea what they were.

Edward stepped to Paul and extended his hand to shake it. Paul's face was calm and he bunched his lips up nodded as he shook Edwards extended hand.

"Thank you" Edward said as Paul had turned to leave.

Paul nodded with a smile and made his way down the hall.

_And then there were two_

We both stood in the hall for a moment, neither making any effort to end the silence.

I spent the time examining his face, he looked so tired and sad. I had no idea what was going on in his head, he seemed to be taking me in as much as well.

"These are for you." He extended the daisies to me with a sad smile.

I reached for them and smiled gently to him. The bouquet was all white daisies and they were wrapped in a light yellow paper with a white ribbon wrapped around it.

I remembered that the morning after we had first spent the night together we were laying in bed still and playing twenty questions. He had asked me what my favorite flower was.

"Daisies, they just seem so friendly." That's what I had said as I lay in his arms totally enamoured with him.

I was smiling at the flowers still when he spoke again.

"He seems like a nice guy, Bella. I'm sorry for interrupting your evening, I guess I just wasn't thinking very clearly when I decided to show up here unannounced."

He was shaking his head and looking at the floor. I could tell he was embarassed about being found at my door while I was with another man.

Granted it was only Paul, but Edward didn't know that I wasn't seeing him or even out on a date. I decided to end his suffering.

"You didn't interrupt anything, Edward. We were actually just coming back from an Alumni mixer that your dad invited me to. Since Paul is new here and a fellow Yalee, I figured it would be good for him too. Plus your dad implied I needed a wing man."

I smiled a little bigger now at the fact that Paul was the worst wingman in the history of the word.

Edward's face was curious now. He cocked his head to the side a little implying he was questioning something.

"My father invited you huh?" He was smiling a little now and at least looking at my face.

"Would you like to come in?" I asked him. I said it so low I wasn't sure if he had heard me. But when I looked at his eyes I could see they were glossy.

"Edward are you okay? What's the matter?" I took a step toward him but he just shook his head no. I didn't know if he was saying he wasn't okay or if he was telling me not to touch him, so I just stood there and watched him with worry on my face.

He stood there with his eyes shut and held the bridge of his nose with his fingers. I saw that there were a few tears running down his cheeks now. I couldn't take it, he was hurting and I could do nothing but stand there and watch.

I wanted to go to him and wrap my arms around him but I wasn't sure he would let me. Instead I just watched in pain as his careful composure slipped away. Each second that passed another piece from him fell away and pain and guilt began to pour out of him.

"Edward, please come inside....please, just for a little bit...you don't have to even talk to me if you don't want to...just please."

I was pleading now, I couldn't stand to see him in so much pain. I hated the thought of him hurting so much, I had never seen this before. Edward was always so composed and careful.

It scared me to be honest. I wasn't even sure what was wrong to begin with, I just knew he needed somebody right now and I wanted to be whatever it was he was searching for at this point.

I went to the door and unlocked it. I stepped inside and waved him through to follow me. I didn't bother turning the lights on, I just shut the door and locked it behind me.

I took his hand in mine and pulled him to the couch, once he was seated I sat down beside him. I was still holding his hand and rubbing my thumb over his fingers.

I sat with him like that for a few minutes while he continued to silently shake tears from his body. When I couldnt take it anymore I broke the silence.

"Edward..." I whispered it and reached for his face. He kept his eye's shut but seemed to be calming down.

I turned his face to me and waited until he opened his eye's. When they finally met my own I brought my other hand to his other cheek and held his face gently.

"Please talk to me...I don't know how to help you unless you talk to me."

He nodded his head and squeezed his eye's tightly. Before he spoke he took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"I screwed up, Bella. I-I'm so...I'm lost. I don't even know what the hell Im doing most of the time. It feels like Im missing a part of me."

He just continued shaking his head and spilling his thoughts.

"Tonight when I was making rounds, I just kept replaying our past over and over again...I was trying to picture all the good things in my head, but everytime I tried I only saw your face at dinner. I couldn't take it anymore...when my shift ended I just sat there in the oncall room. I didn't want to go to my place...I wanted to come to you...to come _home_ to you."

His voice broke at the end, and he pulled me to him and held me tightly. I could feel his body trying to break free of his reclaimed control.

I held him to me just as tightly. My own eyes spilling tears quietly now, as I began rubbing his back slowly up and down to soothe him.

His face was tucked into my hair and I could feel him running is fingers through a few pieces sitting on my shoulder.

So there we sat. Neither of us said another word, we just embraced and each other as tear by tear we released our pain that had built up with my denial and his guilt.

A significant amount of time had now passed us by. My body was begining to ache from the awkward position I was situated in. I slowly peeled my body away from him and sat back.

He watched silently as I bent over and removed my heels. I hooked them with two fingers on my right hand and stood. I turned to him and extended my left for him to take. Wordlessly he grabbed it and stood.

I walked us down the hall to my room and quietly shut the door to the hallway.


	11. Chapter 11

**Songs for chapter 11**

**Just like Heaven- Katie Melua**

**The Blowers Daughter (Acoustic)-Damien Rice**

**Cannon ball- Damien Rice**

Thank you for the reviews. I usually send a message right back through PM's with a teaser of the next chapter. I enjoy reading what makes you like this story and I take every suggestion back into the story. If you sent a review and didn't get a teaser...pm' me and I'll resend it.

This is going to bring us into the thick of it from here on out.. the story should be 22-25 chapters so. A few peeps have asked.

Enjoy Chpt.11~CC

* * *

**(EPOV)**

When I had left Bella's home after my impromptu nap, I had been euphoric. We had finally gotten the air cleared, and she now knew the whole ugly truth that was Tanya.

Before I had left she kissed me and it made my heart soar. It gave me hope that maybe there would be a way out of the hell I had created solely for me.

The hope was enough to fill me for a few days, but after a week I began to worry. I hadn't heard from her since that night and I was debating with myself as to call her or not. I talked myself out of it though, because I remember telling her that when she was ready that she needed to call me and I would come to her.

Her silence to me, meant that she wasn't ready to answer the question we both hadn't answered yet.

"Where do we go from here?"

To me the answer was, back to the beginning. I knew that no matter what, the betrayal would always be there, lingering in the background but with time and maybe even some counseling we could begin fresh and build a new start.

I was fully prepared to take my mothers advice and swallow every bit of pride inside my body. Hell If Bella suggested anything even remotely outrageous I wouldn't hesitate to fulfill the demand. There wasn't anything I wouldn't do for her to be happy.

The other side to that meant that if she decided I wasn't what made her happy, I would need to step aside and let her live her life.

I really believed I could do it. I truly had thought myself able to let her go if I thought it would make her happy.

So when the second week came around and I still hadn't heard from her, I came to the conclusion that _that_ is what I needed to do. She had already let me pour my heart to her and explain my reasons for betraying her. However, sometimes apologies and begging aren't enough to fix what's broken. At some point you have to call a spade a spade.

I had spent that first week trying to make amends with my family. Although my parents had already said that the past was the past, I could still see the disappointment in their eye's from time to time.

The day after I had spoken with Bella, I went to see my parents. I sat them down and spoke about what had transpired the evening and afternoon before.

My mother was supportive of my endeavours, but my father seemed to be a bit weary. Before I had gone home that evening he pulled me aside to tell me something in private.

"Son, I wanted to ask you to do me a favor." He had a serious face on and it seemed like he was trying to decide how to word it.

I nodded to him a yes.

"I know that you have had some time to think about your actions and god knows you've learned from those mistakes, but just be careful okay?" His face was thoughtful when he said it.

"What do you mean dad?" I was lost as to what he was implying.

"Just that I can see now how much you lover her son. You've really done some growing in these last weeks and if it doesn't work out the way you hope, I just want to make sure you'll be alright too."

Now I understood. He was a realist where as my mother was a romantic. He had the vision of not only Bella as a daughter but the very real option of her as just Alice's friend. When I was faced with that option I could feel the pain in my chest tighten.

Alice was the next to focus on. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but with Jasper's help I was able to get her to at least sit for lunch and speak with me.

I had invited her to my home and made her food myself. I set our lunch on the patio and proceeded to tell her exactly what I had told Bella. Instead of the tears Bella had for me, Alice gave rage. She was disgusted to say the least when I told her what Tanya had confessed to me that day.

Her anger toward my lie to Bella was still in place, but at least she understood the length of what I had thought I was facing at the time. We had a truce now and she told me that she would not stand in my way if I did attempt to win Bella back.

With my family in the know and their forgiveness on the horizon, I was now free to focus all my energy on Bella. I did just that too.

Everyday I would make sure to check my answering machine at home as well as my cell phone through shifts. But my confidence was slipping with each passing day and I was finding it harder and harder to make it through my normal routine.

I was constantly in a state of worry, every phone I heard made my heart rate quicken and I would shuffle through my pockets in haste.

Today I had even walked out on a patient mid consult because I thought I heard the faint sound of a chirp.

My shift had ended now and I found myself in the on call room. I had no desire to go to my place anymore, It was driving me mad, I needed to go to her and face this head on. Whatever she told me tonight I would have to respect.

I didn't bother changing from my scrubs, I fled the hospital and made my was to Bella. I stopped at a little market along the way to get her some flowers, I didn't want to show up to her empty handed again.

I ran inside and was prepared to buy the first thing that caught my eye, except what caught my eye was a bundle of white daisies. It felt like a sign, I took them in my hands to pay and smiled.

This was going to work out. It just had to.

When I arrived at Bella's door I was a nervous wreck. I wasn't sure I could handle a negative reaction but I would just have to find out.

I had just knocked on her door when I heard her voice coming down the hall. I turned to see her but when I did my heart fell to my feet. She was with Paul, they were both dressed up and obviously coming back from a date. I wanted to die right then and there, I would have too, but it actually felt like that took more strength than I had left.

Paul's face held an expression of confusion and awkwardness. Who could blame him? There was some random guy with a bundle of daisies at his dates door. Couldn't get more uncomfortable than that If I say so myself.

All of a sudden the air was gone from my body. I was too late, her silence had meant exactly what I had expected it to mean. I had done too much for her to move forward from and now she was trying to move on with her life.

I apologized and began to walk away. Bella looked as if she were going to cry, once again I had caused her pain. I was devastated about this being not only our last moment, but of the way it would be played back in her mind. If it had to be the end than I had wished it would of been in private and for us to have said our peace. That would not be happening.

Before I could get away, Paul spoke up.

He was looking from me to Bella and making a spontaneous decision.

"Um hey man...I-uh...I'm actually gonna go." He said to me.

I stopped dead in my tracks with my mouth agape. There it was, the moment that defines a mans character. My father had raised me to be that man, but somewhere along the road I went in a different direction.

I was now fully aware that Paul was indeed a better man for her than me, and that reality hit me like a wrecking ball. He had to of loved her greatly to be able to step away with that trust and put her needs first.

It was now time for me to take a page from his book, I needed to follow his example and step away from Bella so that she could move forward with this man in front of me. He could be what she needed and I would certainly not begrudge her that a moment longer.

First I needed to acknowledge Paul and let him know I appreciated his gesture. I shook his hand with respect for the first time since I had met him and thanked him sincerely.

That left Bella and I alone. Neither of us spoke for a long moment, I appreciated the silence. I used it to memorize her beauty for the last time before I walked away forever.

When I was sure I could remember every line and tender curve of her body I broke the silence.

"These are for you." I handed her the daisies I had brought for her and she smiled sweetly in return.

I watched her admire them with a careful eye but she seemed to be somewhere else. Hopefully it was where my mind had gone when I picked them out for her.

I let my mind go back to that beautiful morning after I made love to her. I could physically feel her in my arms again, the memory was so strong. I pulled my self away from it, she was no longer mine to dream about that way, she was his to love now, and I needed to respect that.

"He seems like a nice guy, Bella. I'm sorry for interrupting your evening, I guess I just wasn't thinking very clearly when I decided to show up here unannounced."

It was true, I hadn't even fathomed the idea that she would have been out or on a date. Why hadn't I? She was lovely and any man would be lucky to have her on their arm. The pain from that thought was crushing me as I continued to stand there before her. But then she spoke.

"You didn't interrupt anything, Edward. We were actually just coming back from an Alumni mixer that your dad invited me to. Since Paul is new here and a fellow Yaleie, I figured it would be good for him too. Plus your dad implied I needed a wing man."

She hadn't been on a date...did that mean she wasn't dating Paul? The weight these questions carried was enormous. Suddenly I couldn't even form a sentence, all I could do was multiply each question into a plethora of more questions.

I had a sensce of calm wash over me as I realized Bella had spent the evening with my parents. I was hit with love, joy and finally back to pain. I knew there wouldn't be a day that I wouldn't ache for her.

The reality of the situation was upon me now and I couldn't fight back the tears that were in my eyes. When she had asked me in, I didn't know if I could physically leave if she asked me to once I stepped inside the door. That thought brought on a whole new round of silent tears and I could only shake my head no.

I was so lost in my thoughts that when she had stepped in the door I didn't know if she had intended for me to follow. I was relieved when she waved me in behind her. All I could do was follow after her...I think even if it were a negative answer tonight, I always would.

She left the room dark with only the city lights to lead us. I was grateful for it, at least this way I could hide the tears that were leaking from my shaking body as she held my hand for what I was imagining would be the last time. I was trying to calm myself, but the longer she rubbed my fingers and sent the hum through my body the harder it was to imagine leaving her.

She pleaded for me to talk to her about this and I wanted to, but a bigger part of me had no desire to give her up for anything in the world. Finally though I had composed myself enough to answer her.

"I screwed up, Bella. I-I'm so...I'm lost. I don't even know what the hell I'm doing most of the time. It feels like I'm missing a part of me."

I willed myself to keep going while she was still listening.

"Tonight when I was making rounds, I just kept replaying our past over and over again...I was trying to picture all the good things in my head, but every time I tried I only saw your face at dinner. I couldn't take it anymore...when my shift ended I just sat there in the on call room and just sat. I didn't want to go to my place...I wanted to come to you...to come home to you."

With my confession out, I pulled her to me and held onto her like a life line. She was after all the very foundation of my soul. Without her I could not survive.

She held me in return and ran her hands down my back just like she had the first time she held me. It was a beautiful pain that ran through my center that allowed me to greedily breath her in and stroke the luscious locks of hair that caressed her shoulders.

After what could have been hours she slowly pulled away from me. My body ached for her to come back to my arms again, but I sat still and watched her remove her shoes and stand.

She held her free hand out for me to take and greedily I accepted. I had no idea where she was leading me and I didn't care if it was off to the roof to die...I would gladly follow her to the end of time as long as it meant we could be together.

Soon we were in her room and she shut the door behind us. I was hit with the smell of Freesia and chamomile while I stood at the door and watched her make her way around in the dark.

I wanted to scoop her up and hold her to me, but something kept me from doing just that. Bella disappeared behind the bathroom door and I stayed where I was. My body began to react to her room and delicious smell on it's own accord, I was so tightly strung that It felt like my skin would tear if I moved even the slightest.

Bella came out of the bathroom and back into the dark room. I could barely make our her form in the shadows, but then she stepped in front of the illuminated window and took my breath away.

She was wearing my shirt, my white button up shirt. Her hair was cascading down her back and over her shoulder. When she spoke her voice was barely above a whisper.

"You must be tired...how long was your shift? While she made her way to the bed I just stood in the same place and watched her still.

"Um-I-Uh I honestly don't remember..." I really didn't. I was lost right now, the way Bella looked in my shirt right now made me glad I still remembered my name.

When she turned to face me, her face turned up into a smile...and then she started laughing.

I was lost on why, so I just stood there like a dufus and continued to watch as she doubled over in laughter. When it was all out of her system, she sat on the bed and called to me.

"Edward, come here..." she patted the mattress next to her and I moved forward as fast as my legs would take me.

I sat down on the edge of the mattress so that she wouldn't feel uncomfortable, but she grabbed my hand and pulled me further over to the center. Again, I obliged.

"Why did you stay over there in the corner? Did you think I would walk you all the way back here so that you could watch me sleep? I'm not that mean am I?"

She was serious now and her brow was furrowed with worry. I was already shaking my head no before she finished her sentence and brought my hands up to smooth her brow.

"No, Bella. Your a person of great heart and great character...that combination will always keep you in my highest praise." I kissed her forehead and continued to caress from her temple to her jaw. She closed her eye's and leaned into my hand.

After a few seconds, she opened her eyes up to me and smiled gently. I dropped my hand and my gaze to the comforter. I was just about to sit up and excuse myself so she could rest but she poke again.

" Are you ready for bed?" She said it so low it was almost a whisper. I looked over to her and saw that her eye's were soft and a smile was on her lips. She pulled her legs under the comforter and turned her body so it was facing mine. I sat mesmerized by her and nodded yes.

"You don't have to wear that...I know you don't like to sleep with clothes..." She had the same gentle eye's as she said it, but when she said it she dropped her gaze to my pants and bit her bottom lip. I gulped and felt myself twitch. I just nodded again and stared into her hypnotic eyes while I stood to undress.

I could see her chest rising and falling faster and her mouth was agape as I stood before her bare chested. I made quick work of the string that held my scrubs to my waist and released it. I stood before her now with just myself to offer her, I let her take me in fully for a few seconds and then carefully slid into the bed with her.

I was facing her and we lay staring at each other for a few more minutes in silence. I could feel her body heat radiating toward me almost like a magnet. I thought I would burst from the need that was coursing through my body for her. As if she could read my mind, she scooted forward and draped her leg between my thighs and hooked it. Our bodies were aligned perfectly and she felt so right in this intimate position.

I draped my arm over her hip and drew her even closer. Again we tested the restraint for a few minutes before she broke the silence.

"I'm lost too...even now while you here next to me and I can see and feel you...I feel lost." She was whispering into my chest as I caressed her back with my fingers. I wanted her to be able to tell me what she wanted me to know. I didn't want her to feel like this was her burden to carry alone...it was mine to take away from her.

I nodded against her head to encourage her to keep going and she did.

"I'm scared to love you with everything again...I gave myself to you so completely and with no reservations. It hurt, Edward. It hurt so much." I could hear her voice breaking and it felt like a thousand pins were in my heart. I held her closer and nodded to acknowledge her. I didn't trust my voice.

" I'd never been in a relationship like that before...I've never... given myself to anyone so fully like I did you. I can see now all the things we did wrong...how we jumped with out looking below. How I took without asking."

I had tears now as did she. I kept silent though, I knew how hard it was for her to say these things and how much she needed to release the words...how I needed to hear them.

"I want you to know...that your the man I want to want...I just...feel like I'm spinning on an edge when I'm with you. I don't want to fall so hard that I can't ever get up. I need to be able to get up, and know that I won't drown with you."

My chest was wet and cold from the tears that her beautiful face had released. Her voice had been breaking the entire time. I just lay there in the silence with her in my arms, it was the most intimate moment I had ever shared with person.

Bella stopped talking at that point and gently began kissing me from my neck to my jaw. I could feel the tears on her cheeks as I caressed her with my thumbs.

She continued to give soft and gentle kisses from my neck to my jaw and then whispered into my ear.

"Do you love me, Edward?" She rested her head on my shoulder and snuggled into the crook of my neck as I held her body to mine.

I didn't hesitate to answer I pressed my cheek over her head while she snuggled in tighter and I secured her body to mine again with more firmness.

"God, Bella. Yes. So much my love...so much it physically hurts." I flipped us so that I was kneeling over her body and staring into her beautiful brown eyes.

"I won't let you drown, Bella." They were the only words I could get out. Before I could attempt anymore words Bella was shaking with tears beneath me. Her face was etched in pain as her body continued to shake with sobs.

"Oh God, Bella. No...Please, no. My love, don't cry" I peppered her with kisses and held her to me harder. I wanted to take her in my body and shield her from the pain.

My stomach was in knots as I listened to her release her sobbs. She held on to my neck and then brought her tear streaked face to my own and began kissing me. I didn't have the strength to stop her when she pushed up and made me sit back.

I was lost in her kiss when she lowered her body over me and slowly sat on my length. We both released a heavy gust of air at the feeling. She felt so good like this, I wrapped my arms under her own and hooked onto her shoulders to feel her fully over me.

"Bella...oh god...are you...ung!...sure...mmmmmm, god baby....about....fuck...this?" I had to drag the words out over the delicious feel of her hips rocking against my own. She responded by breathing into my ear with, "I love you, Edward".

In that moment I needed her like that just as much she had needed me. Bella began to pull my shirt off he body but I stopped her.

"I'm gonna make love to you in that shirt, Bella. And every time you wear it, I want you to think of this moment and how much I love you. How much I need you. How perfect we fit together."

We stayed in that position and just held on to one another as we rocked each other into euphoria.

All too soon I could feel the tighening in my stomach coil. I could hear her panting and crying out my name with each stroke of our hips.

"Oh god, Edward! Unggggh! I-I.... unghhh! .....Please don't stop baby! .....Unggh!... I need you to make me feel better!

Tonight we weren't having sex, we were bringing each other comfort and peace from the hell we had been enduring.

I felt her body tighten over me and I could feel her wetness spill over my cock as I followed her right over and remained nestled in and around her body while we came down.

Bella, gently caressed my jaw and looked down into my eyes and whispered, "I love you, Edward".

I lay her back and returned the sentiment as I kissed her face. She smiled up to me and asked if I had to work in the morning. In all actuality I needed to return to the hospital in nine more hours, so I nodded yes and she nodded her understanding.

"Bella, I know that I still have a lot to prove to you, and I will....but thank you for loving me."

I held her in my arms until she fell asleep. Once she did, I was already worrying what the repercussions from this night would mean for our already unsure future.


	12. Chapter 12

I appreciate all the great things you have all said about the story. I'm going to be on the road from FL to AZ starting Tuesday, so Im going to try and finish the next chapter by Monday afternoon. After that It will be Friday before I can update next. But I will make the next chapter 13 longer so to make up for that. Enjoy!

* * *

**(EPOV)**

I could feel gentle strokes on my face, I was dreaming. I kept trying to fight the urge to wake up, but then I heard a voice that even death couldn't keep me from. Bella.

She was whispering to me, but I was still in a dream state so the words weren't fully making sensce. I kept my eye's closed and committed myself to hearing what it was she was saying.

As the tender strokes from my temple to jaw continued, so did my concentration. Finally I could now understand what it was she had been saying.

Bella was telling me about what she felt the first time she had met me. I listened now with my eyes still shut about how she was jealous from the moment she looked at me about any woman who had ever been with me. She said that I made her feel brave and drunk with passion. I listened to her explain the way her body ached for mine when we kissed while walking. How my body had made her yearn for release when we made love.

I was aroused to the fullest when I had opened my eyes to her, but then saw she had been silently crying while telling me that. When she saw that I was awake, she dropped her head down to my chest and held on to me.

The sky was still dark so I knew it wasn't near time for my shift yet. I looked to the clock on her side table and saw it was just after 2am. I kissed her forehead gently and then maneuvered so that she was beneath me. Her eyes were closed and her breathing was even, but I knew she wasn't sleeping. I kissed her from her wet jaw back to her eyes while taking her tears into me as I went along.

When her tears had stopped running and there were no more to be collected I spoke.

"Bella...love, look at me baby." I kept my voice low, it was too peaceful a moment for anything more.

She opened her eyes and met my gaze. I just stared into her soul for a moment longer before I kissed her gently on the lips. She kissed me slowly and tenderly as well, but I could feel her pain through the passion, it was just as strong.

I didn't want her to regret what had happend between us, and I had no idea what it had meant to her nor did I know how to ask.

I realized then that when she had confessed her pain earlier that night, she was leading me in the direction I needed to head if I wanted her back.

Bella needed me to be as vulnerable as she felt. If I wasn't then we werent on equal footing and our balance was non existent.

I needed to put myself out on her dizzy edge. She said that she felt as if she were spinning and looking for balance. I needed to be on that edge with her.

I continued kissing her, but the new realisation was clouding my ability to convey my emotions. So I stopped and pulled back from her.

I sat up, pulled her with me and she draped her legs over my hips to be closer. She showed no signs of concern and followed my lead with blind faith. It was one small victory for me while the war still continued.

I gazed into her eyes and held her face as I kissed her one more time on the tip of her nose and began.

"I love you." I took another deep breath and locked her eyes with mine.

"I'm here until you send me away,until you tell me there is no hope and that your only desire is to be free of me....until that moment, I am yours. Even then, I am still yours."

I kissed her lips before she could respond.

Again, I didn't deepen the kiss or seek anything more from her, I let her lead me where she wanted to go.

After a few minutes, Bella pulled back and lay her head on my shoulder. She ran her hands from my chest to my shoulders and down my arms.

Her gentle touch made me shudder with need with each passing circuit, but still I was weary of seeking more.

Instead I settled for rubbing gentle stokes on her thighs and placing small kisses to her forehead.

It felt like eternity as I waited for her to acknowledge my words, but I endured it with patience as I held her to me longer.

"How do we move forward if I cant forget the past." She said it as a statement, not a question. She continued rubbing my body with her dainty hands while waiting for my response.

Suddenly my naive thought of time and counseling sounded ridiculous. I didn't have a realistic answer for her that wasnt filled with my selfish hope of just having her forgive me. I felt defeated all over again.

"It's just that...even with as much as I love you, I don't know how to look at you this way and see past that pain. You had so many opportunities to tell me the truth and you didn't, you didn't trust me to understand or to wait for you until you resolved it. I would have waited..."

If I could do anything different in our past, it would have been that. I wish to every god and spirit that I could take back the decision to lie to her. This lie could very well cost me my future and I willfully had let the words spill from my lips. Nobody had forced me to do it, there was no gun to my head.

No, I made a poor and selfish choice and now Karma had come to collect.

I could feel the ache in my chest that had been sated just hours before come back to the surface. It was such a consuming force that I wasn't sure I would be able to stand if I needed to.

I pulled her to me closer as if she were an anesthetic for my pain and just held on. I wasnt above begging or pleading, I would put it all out there for her.

"Bella, I can't be without you...I lied and I'm so sorry. I have no real reason other than I was affraid you would turn away from me and never let me in. I was selfish and wanted you only for me...I thought I would loose you just as I had found you and that was the driving force behind my betrayal. I just wanted to keep you."

There, not only was I telling her the truth, but she was able to see the extent of my selfishness that consumed me involving all things her.

She was quiet for a while but her gentle caresses continued. After a few more minutes she lifted her head from my chest and kissed my lips. She met my eyes briefly and then stared down at my chest. I braced myself for the pain of her dismissal, but was pulled from the concentration when I felt her begin to gently stoke my length.

"Bella? What are you doing baby?" I couldn't of stopped her if I wanted to at this point but I wasn't sure what her mind set was. My mind was all over the place and I couldn't make heads or tails of any of it.

"I only know that I want you, all of you, the good and the bad, but I just need time. For now I need to feel your love, and the best way to do that is to actually _feel_ your love inside me. I cant explain it...but I can always feel your love when we come together like this."

She pulled her self forward so that my tip was settled between her beautiful bare lips. I shuddered from her warmth and exhaled heavily as I placed my forehead to hers.

"I just want you to feel good, Bella. I dont want you to hurt anymore. You can take from me anything you want as long as it's mine to give. I'll give you all the time you need and anything else you want from me, it's yours."

With that said, she hooked her legs around my back from where they had lay while we spoke and pushed herself onto me. We were in the same position we had been in earlier but somehow this seemed so right for us. I couldn't bring myself to move us from it.

I kissed her with fervor but calmed myself to the tone she was set at.

By some miracle this woman was giving herself to me and I wasn't about to rush it, I wanted to savor every moment of this gift and I did.

We moved together in a rythm that was all our own. I kissed at ever part of her I could find. When I had gotten to every piece of skin that was bare to me, I sought out more.

I began to open the buttons from my shirt on her body and kissed and nipped at everything that was revealed along the way.

When I had undone the final button, Bella tried to shake it off from her shoulders but I stopped her.

I just shook my head no and grabbed the two open sides and pulled her down to my mouth for a searing kiss. She whimpered as I gave her everything I could stir up in my body. I released from her mouth and made my way down her body everytime she would lift up. I caressed her nipples with my tongue and rubbed her back gently.

I could feel her shake and whimper, calling my name as I continued loving on her body with my own. I felt her tighten with each new stroke until she couldnt take anymore and bit down on my shoulder and her walls convulsed around my length.

It triggered my own impending orgasm and I released into her with joy. I was home.

We both just stay in each others arms coming down from our high and enjoying our passion. Eventually Bella broke the silence.

"I know that I can't be without you anymore, just please give me time...."

I could give her time. I could give her anything she desired...anything. I could only nod my head and hold her tighter as I gave her my word.

"I'll earn your trust back if it's the last thing I do." I kissed her firmly and lay her back to rest in my arms.

**************************

When I woke again, it was to the bed shifting in weight. The sky was light grey and the room was quiet. I turned to the bathroom and saw Bella disappear behind the door. I sat up and prepared to fully wake and go to work. I heard the shower going and I assumed Bella was taking one, but then the door opened and she was still in my shirt with only two buttons keeping it together. I smiled to her and she came to my side.

"You need to get up or you'll be late for your shift. I dont know much about hospitals outside of being a patient, but I bet they frown upon that." She had a tender smile for me and continued.

"The shower should be ready for you, so go get in. Come find me when your done, okay?"

I nodded my head and kissed her cheek. I went to the bathroom and saw that she had folded my scrubs and sat them on the counter next to a new toothbrush that looked to be from a dentist visit. I smiled at the gesture and got in.

When I was dressed and ready for the day to begin, I went to find Bella. She was in the kitchen with the music softly playing in the background while standing over the stove. I went to her and wrapped my arms around her waist and rested my cheek against her lovely hair.

"What are you still doing up this early on a Saturday, hmmm?" She rested her head against my chest as she continued with her cooking and just shrugged her shoulders.

"I didn't want you to be hungry when you left so I figured I would just make you some breakfast. Then I realized you probably weren't going to have a lunch either since you didn't go home, so I made you one to take."

The smile on my face must have made me look ridiculous, but I didnt care. The love of my life was standing in my arms, in my shirt and doing what she could to take care of me. I was euphoric.

"You didn't have to do that, Bella. But thank you for wanting to....I really do appreciate it." I kissed her neck and rubbed my nose along her jaw. She shuddered and exhaled in contentment.

I sat at the island with her and ate the omelet she had prepared for us. We both had smiles as we talked about the weekend and what we had planned to do. Bella would be going to brunch with my parents and both Alice and Jasper. They had invited her to go last night at the mixer

I however, was going to be working thirty two hours at the hospital, so I was bummed that I wouldn't be able to at least see her again, even if I would have had to share her attention with my family.

With a final lingering kiss on her lips, I walked out the door to head for the hospital. I had just closed the door behind me when I heard it open again.

Bella, poked her head out the door and her gorgeous hair spilled over with her.

"Hey!" she whispered to me as if in secret.

I turned and the biggest grin came over my face at the sight of her. I walked back and kissed her lips. She pulled back with a wink and handed me a gray thermal pack.

"You forgot your lunch..." I couldn't help but grab her body from behind the door and bring her to me one more time.

If this was to be that last time I would see her until she decided what she wanted, I was going to get as much from this time as I could.

She must have realized that was what I was thinking, and pulled back to see my eyes.

"I just need time...but I don't want to be away from you...can we take it one day at a time? Just see what were feeling day by day?"

Her voice was hopeful and my heart was once again filled with hope.

"Whatever you need, it's yours. You just have to tell me, okay? We will do this whichever way makes you comfortable."

She exhaled and nodded with a smile. I kissed her head and turned to leave with my lunch now in hand.

"Can I call you?" She said a little louder.

"Please do....." We both nodded and I made my way down the hall.


	13. Chapter 13

Songs for this chapter are : Warning sign-Coldplay

Green Eyes- Cold play

So I bet you are all anxious to see if it will fall apart as easily as it was found again...but this is Bella and when does she ever do what we expect her to? ;) This is chapter 13...enjoy.

~CC

* * *

**BPOV (Warning Sign)**

I sat at the kitchen island in a daze after Edward had left. I was trying to remember what it had felt like to not have him in my arms...I couldn't get it in my head anymore. I didn't want to.

I wore a smile all morning as I went about my day. I had missed him so much that it was killing me to be in his arms last night. I had cried at the most intimate moments because it was too much...he was too much.

I couldn't stop replaying the evening in my head over and over again. He was everything I needed and wanted. He caressed me and held me. He kissed me with love and abandon while I ached for him to show me a way to move forward. We still didn't have an answer for how to do that, but I was now willing to find one.

I had cleaned up the kitchen and checked my email by the time the sun was up completely. I was putting off a shower until it was absolutely necessary. I could still smell Edward all over me and I wasn't ready not to. I still hadnt bothered changing from my night shirt that was once Edwards...he had accomplished the goal he'd set last night of making me think of him and everything he did to me while I wore it.

I finally forced myself to get in the shower, brunch was in an hour and a half and I was on the verge of calling him and telling him I needed him again. It was like he had awoken me with his love and touch. I feand him now like a drug.

I was dressed and ready to head out the door when my cell rang. I looked at the caller id and saw it was Paul. I knew I needed to thank him for leaving us last night to talk, but I also knew that Paul was about as nosey as a gossiping old woman...this call was for the juicy information he had not been informed of.

I rolled my eyes and hit talk.

"Hello"

"Okay, I know you have either had sex or have at least had someone arrested...either way I don't want to hear about it over the phone! We are having lunch, so get your butt out of your sex induced coma or sleep deprived bed because I did you a favor and now I want to know why."

It took me a second to process that, then I started laughing.

"Paul, I cant have lunch with you right now. I'm having brunch with the Cullen's today remember?"

"Ahhh, meeting the inlaws! So tell me Bella, is it gonna be a white wedding?"

I was rolling over with laughter now. It took me a few seconds to get composed.

"Gosh, you are worse than a woman! I tell you what, the Cullen's get me for brunch and you get me for dinner...will that work?

"Okay, I'll take it...but when I walk you back up am I allowed to speak to the delivery man about his intentions? Because last night I was too shocked to be in that frame of mind."

"We'll talk at dinner. Call you later and we'll figure out details. Bye"

I called Alice on my way down stairs to see if she had left yet, and luckily she hadn't so I hitched a ride with her. She kept giving me this wierd look the whole way up there, and finally I couldn't take it anymore.

"What!?" I shouted

"Bella, you went to the mixer with Paul last night right?"

I nodded with a skeptical look on my face.

"You guys had some _other_ _mixing_ going on last night didn't you? She had a look that was somewhat amused and the other part nauseous.

"No, Alice. Paul and I did not have sex or kiss or hold hands or do anything romantic of the sorts. We did however make some great contact thanks to your dad."

I nodded in finality and kept my eyes straight ahead.

"Bella, your glowing...if you didn't sleep with Paul, then what the hell were you up to last night? Maybe I'm asking the question the wrong way...let me rephrase...Who did you sleep with last night?"

My mouth was hanging open, and I can only assume my face held a sign of guilt because Alice's mouth was puckered up in a grin and her head was nodding in victory.

I wasn't really ready for her or anyone else to know about what Edward and I had decided upon this morning, but really did it matter if they knew now or next week? Either way everyone was going to have mixed emotions on the subject, so I decided to be an adult and just let her know.

"Actually Alice, I do have something I want to tell you about. But when I do, I don't want you to say anything about it." I gave her a look that said I was serious.

"Why not?" she asked in offense.

"Because I don't want to hear it." I replied in the same tone.

"Well how do you know what I'm gonna say?"

"Actually I don't, but it could go one of two ways only and I would rather have only my opinion in my mind. It's hard enough trying to sort through the mixed messages and emotions that are me...I don't need anyone else trying to cloud my judgement. okay?"

She let out a huge puff of air and shook her head like she was aggravated.

"Fine...what is it?"

I exhaled just as she had and just let the cat out of the bag.

"I saw Edward last night..."

She turned to face me with a look of shock but made no effort to speak, so I continued.

"It was actually a rather emotional night. He had come by to see me after his shift but Paul and I were just returning from the mixer."

Alice had turned her attention back to the road but was nodding as to keep me talking.

"He was outside my door with Daisies and in his scrubs...he thought Paul and I were on a date and went all Kurt Cobain on me. Paul excused himself and Edward and I talked for a while..."

Alice's face looked like she were about to find out who killed JFK so I got to the highlights faster.

"We spent the night together...and we talked, Alice. I mean we really talked. I didn't sugar coat and neither did he. I guess we had just reached our limit, because the words and actions were just flowing from the both of us. It was beautiful."

Alice hadn't said anything just like I asked, but suddenly her silence was scaring me...I wanted to know what she thought of what I had told her at least.

I looked over to her and saw that she was crying. Silent tears, but tears all the same.

"Ali, what's wrong? You think this is stupid of me don't you?" I was defeated...I felt my stomach turn to knots as I waited for her to say anything.

"No, Bella. It's not that...it's just that, well you two haven't had it very easy. I'm just glad that your giving yourself a chance to find out if this is what you want. I mean I love Edward...He's my brother, but I wont deny that you would have had every right to never speak to him again...but I'm glad that you are."

I could feel the knots dissappear just as quickly as they had appeared. She was happy for me and my decision. I was hit with a sensce of calm while we drove, I knew it was only mine and Edwards opinions that counted, but it was nice to know we were supported either way.

We didn't speak of it the rest of the drive, and Alice didn't really seem to want to push the subject. I can only assume that she understood the severity of this decision and understood how I needed to work through this myself.

Brunch was amazing. We were at a wonderful restaurant in the city called _Bongo room _It was delicious and just amazing. Jasper and Alice were talking with Esme about a vacation they were planning and Carlisle kept me in good company.

I was speaking intently with Carlisle about some of the people I had met at the mixer when I was suddenly hit with a splash of cold against my face. I gasped from the shock of it and tried to understand what was happening.

Before I could fully comprehend what had just happened, there was a loud smack accompanied by a sharp sting on my face. I tried to understand what was going on, but I was being pulled from my chair and there was yelling and screaming following behind me. I didnt have a reaction, for all I knew I was being kidnapped or killed. I looked to my right and saw that Carlisle was the one who had ushered me from my seat in haste.

Next thing I knew I was being placed in a car by Carlisle and soon Esme was at my side. I still had no reaction...I just sat there trying to process what had just happened but I was at a loss for words. Blood was rushing through my head and I could barely make out the hushes coming from Esme as she held me to her body trying to soothe me. I was trying to speak but could only hear sobs escaping my body. I wasn't in control of it. I didn't know how to stop it.

The car was moving now and I started to panic. What the hell had just happened? What was all over my face and cloths? Why was my face in pain?

I was about to ask these very questions aloud when the car stopped and the door had opened. A tall and intimidating man helped me from my seat and ushered me into a house that looked as if it belonged on the cover or _Modern Homes_.

Esme was by my side now with a warm rag in her right hand and a cell in her left. She was speaking to somebody but I was still lost in what had just gone down to care about what she was saying.

I heard Carlisle's voice now and then realized he was sitting in front of me trying to get my attention.

"Bella....Bella, can you hear me?"

I nodded my understanding and he continued.

"Sweetheart I need you to go with Alice upstairs and change into something warm. I'll be up in a minute, I need to grab my bag and then I'll take care of your face alright?"

What the hell was wrong with my face? I could feel myself shaking but I couldn't find words to ask what had happened. I tried to stand but couldn't. I heard Alice call to a man named Garrett and soon I was being carried up three flights of stairs by the same man who had helped me from the car. I felt warmth and softness beneath me and realized he had placed me on a bed.

Alice was rummaging through drawers and a closet and returned to me with cloths. I felt her tugging at my blouse and skirt understood that she was trying to change me. I was still shaking and now realized that my cloths were sopping wet and cold. I stood and began to undress as Alice helped me into yoga pants and a pull over sweater.

I was warming up now and the shaking began to slow. I found my words and asked the burning question.

"Alice, what happened?"

She was shaking her head fast and mumbling to herself but wouldn't answer me. Before I could push it, Carlisle walked knocked on the door.

"Is she ready for me to come in?" He asked anxiously.

"Yes, come in" Alice replied.

"Bella, I need to clean your face and see if any stitches are needed alright? Just sit still and I'll try to be quick."

I was shaking my head no. I needed to know what had just happened before anyone did anything else to me or for me.

"I want to know what just happened...please, Carlisle." He nodded his head and sat down next to me. Alice was at the door whispering to Jasper about making a phone call right away.

"Tanya threw a pitcher of ice water at you and then backhanded you while we were speaking. I think she had rings on, because your face is bleeding and looks to be opened up at certain spots. We didn't even see her come up to you or notice her around the table, but somehow she got past us and then began her show."

He said it all with acid in his tone. I could see where Edward got his anger from. I couldnt believe that once again Tanya had managed to cause me pain. The girl was only responsible for this incident, but the fact that she was now the center of the most pain and humiliation I had ever endured was making me feel less than bad for the girl.

Now that I had my answers, I let Carlisle get to work. He was quick and efficient, a very skilled doctor. The whole thing was painless after he gave me some numbing cream and a light pain medication to rest with.

I stayed in the bed and felt myself floating off into sleep. The last thing I remembered was wishing I had thought to call Edward. Even though Tanya was now affecting my life in an all apparent way, my heart and body was sad that he wasn't here with me.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

* * *

**EPOV (Don't Panic)**

I had been running around all morning making rounds and doing paperwork. I was still in the world of an all consuming Bella by the time my morning had come to an end. I looked at my watch and thought of how Bella was sitting down with my family having brunch.

Just the thought of her being loved and accepted so easily by my family made my heart skip. She was meant to be with me...she just had to of been made especially for me. I liked the idea of Bella with my family even when I wasn't able to join her. It showed me how comfortable with them she truly was.

I started to let my imagination get away from me as I thought of how nice it would be once we were married and Bella was carrying our baby. She would want for nothing and would be taken care of to the fullest. My mother would be there to help her adjust to being the wife of a surgeon as well as finding the balance to her own successful career.

My mother was the master of that balance. She had only taken mine and Alice's first five years off from her architecture so that she could be with us. After we started school, she and dad did everything in equal balance as parents and spouses. Yes...she would be able to help both Bella and I reach that same level.

Ahhh, Bella as my wife...Isabella Cullen. It sounded like a dream come true. I wanted it more and more as I thought about it. I just needed to give her time and prove my love then we could be all those things and more. I was pulled from that thought by my cells chirping.

Jasper was calling. I walked into the on-call room where I would be sleeping that night and hit talk.

"Hey man, how was brunch? Bella was there right?"

I wanted him to tell me how she had been and what her emotions seemed like, but I didnt get that far. Jasper's voice was in a state of panic as he responded.

"Edwared, man....some real bad shit just went down and I dont know if you can, but your gonna want to make it to your parents house once you are able to."

I was in panic mode now. What had happened to my parents? Were they okay? Did they get in an accident? My brain couldn't process enough to ask the questions but lucky for me Jasper just kept going.

"Tanya attacked Bella...she threw water on her and hit her in the face while she was talking to your dad. Bella's seems to be in shock and her face might need stitches...but I'm not sure , your dad is taking care of it right now."

I was seething. I was almost sure that my body was purple...I could just feel it. That disguisting excuse for a woman had now crossed my line. I could take a high road when it was my life she had screwed with, but not my Bella. No, not her. I was pacing the room now and my fists were balled up. I wanted to end that _thing _named Tanya.

Jasper kept going and I appreciated it. I still hadn't found words.

"Your mom needs you to call her, she called the police and were filing assault charges but need Tanya's address so that the cops can pick her up.

I couldn't move. I wanted to, but my brain was on some delayed reaction that just wouldn't catch up to real time.

"Edward? Did you hear anything Ive said?" Jasper must have realized now that I hadn't said any words since I answered the phone.

"Yeah, I heard everything...Im just processing still. Is she okay Jasper? How bad is it?"

I knew Tanya was an evil minx of a person, but to attack somebody in a public place for no good reason? That was just disgusting! I needed to get to Bella and be there for her, and I needed to contact my mother so that we could get Tanya to the police.

"Im leaving now Jasper, it shouldnt take me too long to get there...please tell Bella im on my way to her...please."

I didnt wait for a reply, I hung up and made my way to the attending to notify him of the emergency. I had covered endless shifts over the last four months. I went without sleep and never once had I asked whats in it for me...but now I was coming to collect.

He told me to go and that they would get the shift covered. My father was not just a well known man and surgeon, he was respected and appreciated. So when I said family emergency nobody gave me any crap about it.

I sprinted from the hospital and made my way to my car. I raced to my parents house and was almost there by the time my cell phone had rang.

"Hello?"

"Edward...I need to speak with you."

It was a woman's voice on the other line, but not one that I was familiar with.

"Who is this!?" I was not in a patient mood nor was I wanting to speak with anyone unless there name was Isabella, or Esme. That's it. Everyone else could just wait til the sun came up tomorrow.

The woman seemed to be irritated by my tone and snapped back.

"This whole mess is your fault! Don't you dare dismiss me or my sisters needs right now! I cant believe you would drive her to this...this ...jealousy! She loves you and you cheated on her with that woman! How did you expect her to react to that? Huh?!? Tell me!"

Oh! I knew who this was now. Bad choice in calling me...real bad choice.

"Irena? That's your name isn't it? Well let me tell you some thing about your precious sister Tanya...She is a fucking nut job! Just flat out insane! You call her a woman? Ha! You have some audacity to even dial my number after the lies your sister told."

She tried to interrupt but I just got louder to drown her out and shut her up.

"And you know what!? If either you or that banshee you call a sister ever come anywhere near my Bella again...I will make sure that you not only be charged with harassment but I will take it to the press. I will drag you through the mud. I swear to you I will do it."

I hung up and threw my phone out the window I was so pissed! I needed to change my number anyway...so who the hell cares?

I pulled up the drive to my parents house and parked. I ran inside and was met by my family. Jasper was on the phone with what it seemed like was the police. I went straight to them to see what needed to be done.

My dad saw me and exhaled in relief. Everyone else seemed to follow suite and bombarded me with questions of Tanya and her sister.

My dad quieted everyone and began again.

"Son, we need her address and a description for the police. Her sister was calling out names and harassing Bella as I took her out of the restaurant. So we will be pressing charges against them both."

His face was calm, but his eyes were angry. I didnt know if it was directed to me or just the situation, but all of a sudden my bravado was wearing off. I needed to see Bella. I needed to know if this was it. I needed to do what she wanted.

I gave my father the address and the description of Tanya. Once the necessary was done, I asked the question I needed answered.

"Where is Bella? How is she? Is it bad?"

I was sick now. The anger had worn off and all that was left were nerves twisting and contorting through out my body. I thought I was going to throw up from it.

"She's asleep in Alice's room...I gave her some pain medication but she didnt need stitches. Its gonna bruise Edward. Its gonna bruise bad. But other than that she will be alright."

I was shaking with anger and sadness. Why couldn't she of come after me? I would have gladly let her beat the crap out of me rather than her cause Bella any pain...ever.

"I need to see her dad...I'll be back down in a bit...and thank you for taking care of her."

He just nodded and sat down with my mother. Alice stood to follow me, I knew that she wanted to tell me more than my father had. So I nodded for her to follow me.

"Edward...I didn't even see her there...we had no idea where she came from. If we had seen her we would've left. I'm sorry."

Why was Alice apologising to me? She didn't do this...she hadn't caused this scenario by a lie she told months ago...I did. If anything I figured she would be angry with me for this. I didn't understand.

"Alice, why are you sorry? You didn't do this and you had no idea what Tanya was going to do even if you had seen her. Please don't feel like you did anything wrong."

"I _know_ Edward..."

I gave her a look of confusion. Knew what?

"Alice, I don't know what you mean"

"Bella told me you and she are working on things. She told me about last night...she seemed so happy today Edward. She seemed so hopeful about you two. I just hope this doesn't change that."

I was shaking again. I was shaking with emotion from what Alice had just said.

Bella was hopeful. She was happy and hopeful from our night together. She really did want this as much as I did...I just needed to make sure that she still did. I would do anything. Anything she asked of me. I needed to see her.

"Alice, please just give us some privacy for a while? Don't let anyone disturb us ...please? "

I asked her. I just wanted my time with Bella to be private with no one coming and going. My family was notorious for that. She nodded her head with a half smile as I made my way through the door.

I walked in and saw Bella in my Dartmouth sweater and some comfy cotton bottoms. Her dainty little form was curled up on her side facing me and her precious feet were curled up beneath her. I smiled at her sleeping form and went to her side.

As soon as I was within ranger of her face I was filled with hate again. Her right cheek was red and swollen. She had scrapes and small punctures on her cheek bone. I was shaking from the need to make Tanya pay for that.

I took a deep breath and leaned down to kiss her head. I rubbed my cheek against her forehead and continued to leave lingering kisses. I heard her take a deep breath and moan as her body stretched out. I couldn't help but smile at how cute she looked when she woke up.

Her brown eyes fluttered open and seemed to be taking my presence in. I smiled sadly to her and dropped my head to the mattress beside her. I felt her little fingers running through my hair and down my neck. I was instantly relaxed again as she soothed me with just her touch.

I sat up quickly after I realized she was soothing me. No! I was here to soothe her not the other way around!

I stood from where I was kneeling and smiled to her softly. I picked her up in my arms and kissed her lips gently.

"Edward, what are you doing?" she asked me with confusion in her voice.

I squeezed her a little tighter to me and kissed her forehead before walking down the hall with her to my room.

I set her on my bed and tucked her in. I walked around and took my shoes and socks off. I wanted to be whatever she needed, so I went to my drawers and got a change of clothes from my gym drawer. I always had extra from when dad and I would play ball outside.

I changed out of my scrubs and into my shorts and t shirt and climbed into bed with her. She curled her little body up to mine and I held her tightly to me.

"So...I take it you heard?" She asked in a comical tone.

I rolled my eyes because she was making a dang joke of it. I didn't understand her anger sometimes or lack there of to better put it.

"Here I was preparred for your wrath that would put grizzlies to shame...and your making jokes." I was shaking my head with very little humor.

"I'm just glad your here with me...maybe later okay?" She teased.

I just pulled her closer and tucked her good cheek against my chest. Then I began.

"Baby, I don't even know what to say...I'm so sorry you got hurt. That vile woman hurt you because of me. I wish I could take away your pain."

I kissed her head and rubbed her back as I waited for her to tell me how she was feeling.

"Well, I guess it is because of that lie that this happened... but I don't blame you for what she did today. That was all her...unless..."

She trailed off and it sounded uneasy. I was nervous now.

"Unless what baby?"

"Well... you have been honest with me right? You haven't seen her since you told her about us that day? Because if its still the same way it was before then..."

Her voice was in hysterics as she sat up and trailed off again. I was shaking my head no to her so that she understood that I hadn't lied to her and that Tanya had indeed been out of the picture.

"No baby, no more secrets remember? I haven't seen of heard from her since I told her I didn't want to. I told her the truth and then left her there after her little reveal to me. I didn't make any move to contact her, and neither did she.

Bella seemed to relax a little as the words settled over her and nodded. She exhaled loudly and collapsed against the mattress. I leaned over her with concern, I had no idea what she was thinking and it was killing me. I didn't know what she needed me to assure her of more...was it my love or my faithfulness? I was panicking now.

"Love, are you alright? Do you need anything?"

She just shook her head and kept looking straight ahead toward the ceiling.

"This is just going to be one more thing to get past is all."

I felt like I was just sucker punched in the gut...all the air I thought I owned was bagged and sold from right under me.

Suddenly I couldn't think straight, I felt pain prickling in my eyes. She didn't deserve this...this kind of thing shouldn't happen to a girl like Bella. She was too good, too pure and good for people like Tanya to taint with their existence.

I grabbed on to her torso and dropped my head to her chest. I held her with everything I had and just let the emotions wash over me.

"I'm so sorry Bella. Your right...this is too much, I cant let you do any of this...it's too much! I'm sorry."

I felt Bella sit up and move away from me. I looked up with pain clearly all over me to see her once more, but her face was angry now. She looked so angry.

"And what the hell does that mean?" She spat at me

I sat there dumbfounded by her reaction and just stared.

"You deciding what I can and cant handle is exactly what got us into this mess. Stop trying to make decisions for me Edward. I'm a grown woman, a college graduate and very logical person. I am capable of choosing the correct path for myself! It's how Ive gotten to be where I am today, and every time you try to choose my path you diminish my opinion and degrade my self respect. So Stop!"

My mouth was hanging open, I felt like an idiot. She was right, I had attempted to make decisions for her and by doing that, I took away her freedom to choose. I just nodded my head to her with my eyes shut.

"Im sorry, Bella. Your right. I did do all those things...I've just never cared so much for anyone and I try to protect you from everything but it just keeps blowing up in my face...tell me, what do you want to do?"

Her breathing was still heavy but her face was relaxed. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"I just want to go home and get in my shirt and lay in my bed...I don't like being the center of attention, and I have a feeling that if I stay here that is exactly what I will be."

She said it with finality in her tone and I nodded my understanding.

"Okay...would you like me to drive you or would you prefer Garrette to do it?"

I would give her options...I would let her choose.

"I would like it if you would take me...if you can...are you going back to the hospital?"

Her voice was small now and she seemed to be embarassed about something.

"No, Bella. I want very much to stay with you if you'll let me...I want to be with you."

I moved to her and embraced her tightly. She held on to my neck and nestled her good cheek to my chest again and said, "Of course I want you to stay with me Edward...I always want you..."

I kissed her forehead and released her from my body.

"I need to go tell my family that were going..."

She nodded her head and came to my side and grabbed my hand.

"We'll both go and tell them...okay?"

I smiled and nodded my agreement.

When we arrived down stairs my family all popped their heads up from the table. My mother came to Bella and hugged her tightly. My father began his examinations of her face from his seat but made no effort to coddle her like me or my mother.

As I was approaching my father Bella grabbed onto my hand again but was still talking to my mother. It seemed like she did it unconsciously and my father noticed. He raised his eye brow slightly and looked to our joined hands with humor on his face but said nothing of it.

I explained to them Bella's wishes and thanked them for everything. My mother was still on the war path and determined to go after Tanya with the law. Bella took some time and went over her statement with Garrett to give the police. Bella was more than happy to cooperate with him and make sure that this was not just swept under the rug.

Our family was not just average upper class in Chicago. We were old money...which meant that our name had been a big part of the citys development. My father had most of the connections and used them to his advantage for the situation with Bella.

All she needed to do was give her statement and then we could handle the rest. I actually tried to even pitty Tanya...I tried. She had not just assulted an innocent woman in public, but she also just offended my family. My parents dont take to kindly to either offenses, but the fact that it was Bella just increased their ire and distaste for that woman.

When we finally got out of there and onto the road it was five o'clock in the evening. Our ride was quiet and we didnt make any move to speak. I would occasionaly run my fingers through Bella's hair as I drove, it was more for my comfort than hers, but she never made any complaints.

When we finally arrived, she had me park in the extra space just like the first time. I smiled at the memory and helped her out of the car. We made our way up stairs and luckily had the elevator to ourselves. Bella was becoming self conscious of the way her face was swelling and changing colors and she didnt want anyone to stare.

Once inside she headed straight for her room. I almost didnt follow, but decided to because she hadnt asked me otherwise. I sat at the foot of her bed as she made her way into the bathroom and shut the door. I was emotionally exhausted from this day and lay my head back while my legs stayed planted to the floor.

I heard the door open and sat up. Bella was in my shirt again and walking to her side of the bed. I smiled to her while she did it and she just gave me a half smile and rolled her eyes. Before she pulled back the covers she in took a breath and yelped.

"What is it?" I asked her.

"Oh god! I forgot I was supposed to have dinner with Paul tonight. He called me this morning and wanted _the juice_ as he so eloquently put it, about what we did last night." She finished and was rolling her eyes. She started walking around the room looking for something as she continued.

"Anyway, he wanted to do brunch but I was having that with your family so I told him we would talk about it at dinner." She found her purse and reached in for her cell.

"Yep, four missed calls...all from Paul. Great! He's gonna think I blew him off". It looked as if she were trying to call him back but was getting aggravated after two attempts and threw the phone on the bed.

"Bella, just rest okay? He'll understand once he hears why you didnt answer." I dropped my head and let the reality of it hit me again.

"Edward, I know your blaming your self and maybe what happened today is because of the past, but I don't blame you for her actions. You don't control those more than you do the weather."

She said it low and then came to me and kissed my head. I just nodded and held her back. I was just about to go into a deeper apology when we were both startled by the door. I could her the knocking coming all the way down the hall and Bella jumped back startled.

I was in protector mode now and kissed her head.

"Baby, stay in her and lock the door alright?" She nodded her head but she looked so scared.

I gave her a reassuring smile and made my way down the hall. If if was anyone that was attempting to even as much as hint at a threat to Bella, I would annihilate them. I approached the door and the pounding continued. I looked through the peep hole and laughed in relief.

I opened the door and it was Paul, he was carrying daisies and wearing scrubs over his clothes when he saw it was me who answered, his face broke into the biggest grin and then hunched over laughing. I joined him.

"Oh god! I swear Im not making fun of you, I was just gonna give Bella a hard time! I promise!"

He was cracking up the entire time he said it and so was I. He walked in and I led him into the living room. We sat for a moment and let the laughter die out.

"She was trying to call you man, she had one hell of a brunch today and it ended with police. She's resting right now, so you'll have to get _the juice_ another time!" I laughed harder now and so did he.

"Police? Bella and police have never gone hand in hand with each other unless your talking about the Chief...did he show up or something?"

Now I wanted the juice. Who was the Chief? Hmmmm....

"You know what Paul, I'm kind of hungry and I need to get Bella some dinner. Since she doesn't want to go out we could grab a quick bite and I'll fill you in...sound good?"

His eyes lit up at the thought of hearing the story a day earlier and nodded his agreement.

"I'm just gonna go tell Bella."

I made my way to the room and knocked.

"Baby its just me...can I come in?"

The door popped open and she stood behind it with only her head visible. I walked in and shut it. She wasn't in my shirt anymore, but had on my sweater and a pair of jeans. I furrowed my brow in confusion and she bit her lip in embarassment.

"I uh didnt want to have to run for it in only your shirt..." she trailed off. I Just smiled at her logic and kissed her hard.

"It's just Paul. He and I are going to run and get you some dinner, do you have any requests?"

She just looked at me incredulously for a moment and then shook her head no.

I eagerly helped her undress and slip back into my shirt and tucked her in. She asked me to bring her the laptop and I happily obliged. After she was all settled and comfortable I locked up with her keys and set off to dinner with Paul.


	14. Chapter 14

Okay, sorry for the delay, but the road from FL to AZ is long! Anywho...here is chapter 14. I will have fifteen done in an hour or so, so I hope it makes up for the wait. By the way I need a Beta...does anyone who reads this do that?

Thanks! CC

* * *

**EPOV (9 crimes)**

We were sitting at a table in Geno's waiting on Bella's calzone. Paul didn't disappoint with the questions he was dying to ask. I sat with him for that twenty minutes drinking our beers and telling him the story that was now Bella and mine.

"Wow...you're one boiling rabbitt away from a fatal attraction." He said, shaking his head and chugging his beer. Only Paul could find any humor in this twisted web I had spun.

Although I was mentally thinking the same thought. Tanya had defiantly proved that she was the kind of person who took the low road at any cost even if it meant her self respect. I tried to push past her and think of my Bella, but every time I did I saw the marks and bruise on her beautiful cheek left by that animal.

I had thought I hated Tanya before. Truly I did...but now, no now I really hated her. I wished her absolutely no happiness and even went as far as hoping that any and everything she ever wanted was taken from her. I was lost in my anger when Paul interrupted my thoughts.

"You love her" He said it as a statement.

I could only nod yes to him. Any words on the subject wouldn't do my feelings for Bella justice. Paul just stared hard at me for a long moment with out speaking. It seemed as if he were trying to decide if I was being honest or not. I just stared back with the most honest look I could give.

Luckily the waitress came over with the calzone in a to go box. Paul and I finished our beer and made our way out of _Geno's_. I just wanted to get back to my love.

When we reached my car, Paul's phone rang. He checked the ID and his brow furrowed. Immediately my heart rate accelerated. I didn't have a phone...I threw it out the window.

If Bella needed me she wouldnt be able to get a hold of me. I was already in the car with the engine on when Paul came to my window. I lowered it so he could speak to me.

"I uh-um need to head off on my own man. I'm just gonna catch a cab, so give Bella my love." He had turned to leave then stopped in his tracks before turning back to me.

"Edward...she doesn't deserve what she's putting up with...so please find a way to make this right without causing her any more trouble." His face was serious and it held an edge to it. I felt like crap already about what had happened to her, but now Paul drove it home. He loved her too...maybe not the way I loved her, but his intentions were honorable. He just wanted her happy and right now she was paying a price that she didnt deserve. I set off for Bella's going 80 mph.

When I arrived back to her place, I opened the door and noticed all the lights were off now. I crept my way to the kitchen and placed her calzone in the fridge.

When I was walking down the hall, I saw that there was a faint light coming from under her door so I just let myself in without knocking. When I did, I saw Bella laying on her side asleep with her bruised cheek face up. I cringed as I leaned over her to kiss her head.

It never failed to piss me off to no end that she had been the one to once again be hurt. With a clenched jaw and balled up fists I made my way around the bed and stripped down. It was only seven o'clock, but I didn't want to go home. I couldn't leave her here alone...I just couldn't leave her.

I shut the lamp and slid in next to her curling my body around her. I exhaled a deep breath as I felt the tension leave me. Just holding her and breathing her in was enough to tame my anger for the time being.

I could feel her shifting closer to me in her sleep and relaxing into my form. I smiled at the thought of her finding comfort in my embrace and kissed her shoulder gently. Bella then rubbed her firm bottom closer and harder against me. I was instantly hard from the gesture as I felt a silky soft fabric rub up against my bare length. I couldn't hold back the groan that escaped my lips and ended up right in her ear.

I tried to calm myself, I didnt want to wake her for my selfish needs. She had been through a lot that day and the last thing I wanted was for her to think I expected anything other than for her to let me take care of her.

My efforts were useless though. The harder I fought my urges, the more insistent her maneuvers became. Soon she was whimpering and saying my name in a hushed tone in her sleep. I gulped down a big amount of saliva that had collected in my throat.

The woman who lay beside me was perfect...well perfect for me. I had never been brave enough to even dream of anything close to what she was...and I couldn't help but be thankful to whatever god was out there that she had chosen to love me as well.

I stopped fighting my instincts and began making my way up and around her neck with lingering open mouthed kisses. Her skin was delicious and if I thought it would be appropriate I would leave marks all over her body so that I could taste it all fully.

I had just began nibbling on her shoulder when she stirred and stretched her body along my own.

"Edward...? When did you get back?"

I just continued kissing and rubbing up against her as I spoke between each new kiss.

"About_(kiss)_ten_(kiss)_minutes_(kiss)_ago_(kiss)"._

"mmmmm" she breathed out and pushed further into me.

I was never happier than when I was showing Bella love. The feel of her soft skin beneath my fingers made me ache with need for her and always drove me further over the edge of loving her.

She pulled my hands from around her thighs to her chest and held them in her own tightly.

I dove my head into her neck and just let out a breath. Being this close to her was just as good as being in her. I was just thankful that she still wanted me.

"Kiss me, Edward."

She asked it so low and I couldn't deny that request for anything or anyone so I turned her to lay on her back and brought my mouth to hers for a deep kiss. But before I could reach her lips, she was shaking her head no.

I was worried that I had hurt her and began to pull away with worry on my face.

"What is is baby? Whats wrong?"

She bit her lip and brought her right leg up the length of my own to my hip.

"Not on those lips..."

She was biting her lip again but I could see the lust that glazed over her as I met her stare. The sound that escaped me was almost feral. I dropped my mouth to hers anyway for a long intense kiss before I started to move my body lower down hers.

I kissed and nibbled at her skin as I lifted her night shirt higher and higher. FInally I met the edge of her silky thin panties and ran my tongue from side to side at the waist. Bella was rubbing her legs slowly over my body in an effort to drive me to where she wanted me, but I was taking my time enjoying her beautiful body beneath me.

"Please baby..." She asked it so sweetly and the fact that she used that endearment drove me over the edge. I kissed her over her panties first then dropped the waist down to give her what she really wanted. Just as I had made two passes over her core a phone began chirping loudly.

Bella groaned and her body tensed. I tried to keep going in an effort to get her to ignore it, but she wouldn't.

"Just call em back love...let me taste you for now." I continued dropping my tongue to her clit and dipping it into her and was rewarded with a breathy "_okay"._

My love was whimpering and running her fingers through my hair as I continued to lick suck and nip at her. She would hold me to where she wanted me longer and I happily gave into her needs. I wanted to do anything for her that would make her happy so I lavished her with all my attention to whatever and wherever she wanted me.

Her phone was going off again and now so was her house phone. We both stilled for a moment as the thought of it being an emergency hit us both. I sat up and Bella did the same.

She threw me her cell and she grabbed her cordless. I saw that it was Alice on her cell and answered it just as Bella stated her hello on the house line.

"Alice? Whats wrong?"

"Edward...? You're still with Bella?"

She sounded nervous and a little on edge.

"Yes, why whats wrong?"

"Well Tanya is apparently still out and about, because she showed up at the hospital earlier causing a scene demanding to see you or dad. They called us to let us know she was in hysterics and threatening the nurses if they didn't tell her where you were. Dad's been trying to call you and so has the hospital. We were worried that something may of happened to you...the girl is more than unstable, Edward."

I was in shock. My head was trying to make sense of what Alice was saying but I couldnt get it to make any sense. I looked to Bella and her face held the same shocked look as mine. I heard her say a quick good bye and then watched as her face went from shocked to angered.

"I'm fine Alice. I don't have my phone anymore, Im gonna get a new one tomorrow...uh does dad need to talk to me?"

"No...he's out right now. But make sure you get a new phone! Just go now...its open for another hour or so and what if the hospital needs you? You cant be without it Edward."

"Your right...I'll go right now...sorry for the scare Alice. I'll call you in a bit when I get the phone, okay?"

"Alright, just be safe...god knows what that _thing _is capable of."

I hung up with Alice and turned my attention back to Bella. I didn't realize I had been rubbing her leg the entire conversation but when I looked down I could see that I still was. She still looked angry and I could only imagine why.

"Baby, who was that?" I asked her.

"Your mom...she was telling me about what happened at the hospital today."

I just nodded my head yes and kept my eyes on her. She was breathing deep trying to calm herself and then spoke up.

"Edward, I need to know whats going to happen...I cant be in the middle of something like this. Tanya seems to be adamant about speaking with you and if things happened the way you said they happened, then I don't know what she needs to talk to you about. Do you know or have any idea why she would hit me then cause a scene at the hospital?"

She looked as if she were ready for her heart to be trampled on. Her words had started out strong and had now become low and pained. I could only imagine the horrible things she must of been thinking and imagining in her head as reasons Tanya would need to speak with me and be so angry.

I was shaking my head no and trying to find the words that would end her doubt.

"Bella, I don't know why she did anything she did today...I have no idea. My only thought is that it's anger for being dumped. It sounds shitty to say it that way, but I don't really care about how shes feeling or why she thinks that it was unjustified...I dont love her. I never did. All I did was set things right and I'm not sorry for that."

She was staring at the covers now but if looked like her mind was turning the words over in her head. I waited patiently for her to say something.

"Edward...we haven't been using condoms...we never have. We both know Im on birth control, but given the situation and all that's come about it in the last few days I'd like to know about your past. I mean I know this is a bit late since we have been with each other many times but I guess I never really thought about you with anyone else...it was naive I know, but true all the same."

Her voice was low and guarded. I was in a state of fear now, this was the conversation I had been dreading. I was less than an angel when I met her and I had only one serious relationship in all my life, and currently she was hitting Bella and causing scenes at my work place for my father and myself. Not the best way to convince the love of your life that your responsible.

I took a deep breath and began.

I've been with a lot of women Bella. I've always been safe and used condoms and I've been tested...in fact your the only woman I have ever been with that I havent used a condom with...ever. Tanya was the only person I've had any kind of relationship with. I'm ashamed to say the least, but its the truth."

I looked up and saw her face was expressionless. She sat there and let my words sink into her head before she spoke up.

"How many is a lot?" Her face was still set in concentration and her voice held no emotion.

I could feel my stomach turning now. I didn't want to give her a number and watch her turn disgusted. But I couldn't lie to her either, so I dug deep one more time and gave her the truth.

"About twenty...maybe more."

Her mask had fallen now and her jaw was dropped. She looked like I had just slapped her other cheek and told her I hated her.

I felt my chest tighten as the stinging was in my eyes now. I was scared this would be too much and she would walk away, I didnt want this to be why she left for good.

"Bella...please tell me what your thinking."

I needed to know. I needed to hear her say the words out loud so that we could work past this together. If she kept this inside there was no way of knowing that she wouldn't talk herself out of us.

"I have now words...I just...none."

She got up from her bed and made her way to her dresser, she pulled some things out and walked into the bathroom shutting the door and locking it behind her.

I sat in the same place in shock. I hadn't expected her to be thrilled or okay with it, but I expected some kind of anger. I was at a loss of what to think, but then I heard the shower running. I dropped my head to the bed and covered my face with my hands.

She was showering, no doubt trying to clean herself from what I had been doing to her earlier. I was sick now at the thought of her finding me detesting. I got up and put my shorts and shirt on. I didn't want her to come out and find me still naked in her bed, so when I was dressed I made my way to the bench at the end of her bed and waited for her to come out.

When the door opened, Bella emerged wearing her light blue pajama pants and her white camisole. She didnt meet my eyes and went straight to the hall. When she walked in she had new sheets and pillow cases.

I got up to help her strip the bed even though it felt like she had just kicked me in the gut, but she held her hand up for me to stop and sit again.

I complied and watched as she stripped away our memories from the last evening and just minutes before. I sat with my eyes closed now and hung my head while I waited for my dismissal.

"Baby, please talk to me love..." I pleaded

"Is that what you called them too, Edward? Were they _baby _and _love _as well?" Her tone was angry and pained.

My jaw had fallen now and the churning turned into a full fledged storm inside me. I could only shake my head in denial because my voice was lost.

"Did you fuck them in your shirts too? Did you make them cry out to you that they was yours?

I stood and walked to her, but she turned her back on me. But I said the words to her anyway.

"Bella, you are the only woman I have ever been with in that way. I wasn't a saint when we met...far from it. Sex was always just that...sex...I didn't know I would ever feel like this with another person, please don't ever compare what we have done and made each other feel to _that_ever again. Please."

I dropped my head and kept my eyes closed. I needed her to understand that I loved her and that it had never been like this before for me. Never.

"Bella...I've only ever touched _you_ the way I do." I came up behind her and ran the back of my fingers down the side of her right arm. She took in a sharp breath but said no other words to me.

I brought my lips to her ears and whispered, "You are the only woman I have called _love and baby._..you are the only one who I've demanded be mine and mine alone...I. Don't. Want. Anyone. Else." I said with finality into her ear.

She stepped away from me and continued to face the window

"Maybe you should be going now, Edward. It's late and you have to work." I was shaking my head no slowly with my eyes still closed as she said the words.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" I knew the answer, but I needed to ask her all the same.

"I have a lot of work to do Edward...I'll call you when I get some down time."

All the oxygen was gone now and blood had rushed to my head making me dizzy, I didn't want to leave her here to think of all the reasons to never see me again.

"I dont have a phone anymore Bella. I um...well I dont have it anymore and I wont have time to get a new one for a while...so...."

"Then I guess I'll see you when I see you."

I stood stock-still for what seemed like hours just waiting for her to turn to me...but she didn't.

Eventually I had to turn away and leave her room. When I shut the bedroom door I let the tears fall. I was in pain and I didn't know how to make myself feel better. Bella was all I could or would ever want to take my pain, but now I had done too much. She couldn't deal with it and I couldn't blame her.

I walked out of her home and made my way to my own.


	15. Chapter 15

Loved the reviews for 14! Laughed when I read a few cause I had answered their questions before I had read them in this chapter...enjoy....16 is almost done...It may go up today.

* * *

**BPOV (Lie Detector)**

I couldn't really move. I stayed facing that window until I heard the faint sound of a door closing from the front room.

He didn't just have a sex life, he had an entire slew of women and had shared with them the things we had. I didn't want to think of how many ways he touched me and had possibly done the same to them.

When he said that he only touched me that way and then proceeded to caress my arm, I took a sharp breath. It wasn't from the feel, it was from the thoughts that came along with that touch. He had been with many people and I hadn't. I truly was a bit of a prude if I was being honest.

In college I was too preoccupied with school and keeping my scholarship to even think about getting any kind of action. Outside of Paul no guys really even showed interest in me. When I graduated and came to Chicago I had two relationships...one was short lived of maybe three months and the other was a year long. It was filled with lots of sleepless nights playing and touching, but nothing like the way Edward made me feel.

"_twenty...maybe more." _Just the way he said it made me sick. It didn't seem like he was bragging or anything, but to be non emotional about it. I must have looked like an idiot with my mouth hanging open and I was aware of it so I did what I could.

I jumped up and took a shower to calm my nerves. I wanted to be open minded. He was older than I was, and definitely better looking...but that was a large number for any person outside of a gigolo or a hooker.

I didnt understand it...he had grown up seeing Esme and Carlisle. They had a great marriage and always seemed so happy...you would think that after being exposed to that for so long one would seek the same thing for them selves. Surely they would instill those values in him as they would any others right?

I went to my bed and tried closing my eyes. I wanted this god forsaken day to end already. Too much had happened since the early hours of midnight to now and I could feel the weight of those actions settling them selves over me.

I couldn't sleep though...I had been with him countless times over our six week relationship and then just within the last many hours. I had been careless....again. I couldn't reason with myself why I always threw my careful rules away when it involved Edward. Something about him just drove me to be another person. I never thought things through when he was around...I just let my emotions take me on a joy ride.

But now, in the light of everything that had happened and been shed, I knew that I could no longer let myself get sucked in like that. I needed to be an adult again and stop thinking like a teenage girl. I had a career and future to think about and if I continued to let myself fall the way I did, then I would truly never be able to get up.

With my new resolve in place, I got up to pick up my laptop from the floor. I wanted to do something...anything that would keep my mind off of what had just happened, so I began some final touches in a story I had been writing.

I was just past the middle when my cell started chirping. I looked at the ID and saw it was a new number that I didn't know of. I answered it just in case it was one of the Cullens, and it was.

"Hello?"

"Bella...this is Edward...I uh-I ...just picked up a new phone...I wanted to make sure you had the number in case you needed anything or wanted to talk."

I had tears in my eyes already. As much as I wanted to stay mean and hateful toward him I just couldnt. I wanted to so badly.

"Um, yeah okay. I got it...I'll save it."

We were both quiet for a moment and then he broke the silence.

"Bella...I don't want to make you feel like your pressured into anything. I'm gonna give you your space, and when you're ready to see me I'd like it very much if you'd call me so we can."

He sounded pained. I wished with everything I had that I could just move past everything and tell him it was all okay now, but I couldn't. We needed some time...for what I don't know. I guess to heal or think or even to just let this Tanya business pass us by, but either way we did need some distance.

"Thank you...I will call...just...I...well I'll call okay?"

I heard him clear his throat a little and then say, "Okay"

I hung up and sat in my bed with my head in my hands. I loved him...that much was clear. So if this was to be, then we would have to wait and see what played out.

I was smart enough to know that sometimes love isn't enough...you have to be able to trust your partner and if you dont, then your setting yourself up for failure. The truth is that I didn't trust Edward. I wanted to but I just couldn't. He knew it and eventually the constant need for reassurance would of worn on him as well. This was for the best...we needed to just breath**.**

**

* * *

  
**

The next morning I awoke to the sun high in the sky and an empty bed. I lay perfectly still and let the quiet wash over me. After about ten minutes I sat up and made my way to the shower.

When I was dressed and ready to start my day, I made my way into the kitchen. I made a light brunch for myself and ate alone. My phone was amazingly quiet and my place was clean. I walked to the fridge for some juice and saw a pizza box sitting on the shelf. I looked at the brown box and took it into my hands.

It was from _Geno's. _I smiled and took a deep breath from the memory. Edward went to Geno's for me last night. He brought me dinner so I wouldn't have to make anything. He came back and stayed in bed with me and lavished me with attention and caresses. I was crying a little now.

Why couldn't it be that easy? Why couldn't that be enough for me? I hated that our relationship had become so twisted and backwards when all along it was set on a foundation of love. It was...he loved me...and I truly loved him too. How I longed to go back to the start and just make a fresh begining. I wondered where we would of been right now had he been honest from the start.

I was pulled from that thought with a knock at the door. I went to answer it and there before me was Paul. He was all smiles until he stared intently at my cheek for what seemed like hours. I became self conscious and dropped my head.

"Its rude to stare you know." I said defensively

"Sorry Bells, I just didn't realize it was so bad." His jaw was tight and his eyes were angry.

I waved him in and he followed me into the kitchen

When he sat down and started picking at the cold calzone, his face was lighter and he seemed to be over the anger.

"Where's Edward? Did you wear him out last night when he got back? Is that why this is uneaten?

He took a big chunk from it and bit down while still sporting a smile. Mine however had not returned and the tears were falling forcefully now.

"Bella...what happened?" He was by myside now and hugging my shoulders. I couldn't get myself under control so I just gave up trying and relaxed into his arms.

I told him everything...most he already knew he said but then I told him of the hospital and the numbers talk I had with Edward.

His expression remained attentive and understanding as I told him how I had felt. When it was all out on the table Paul spoke.

"Bella...I know you have been dealing with a great amount of crap since this guy walked in your life and then out..then back in. But can I tell you something without you thinking Im taking sides?"

I just nodded and wiped my eyes with Kleenex as he started.

"I'm a guy Bella...a very _active _guy, if you know what I mean."

I just rolled my eyes at that...it was an understatement.

"I sat with him yesterday as he told me all that you just did...minus the numbers cause it hadnt happened yet. But he told me how much he wanted you and why he did the things he did. Now I know that a lie is a lie and all that good stuff, but as a man who has been around the block and played a lot of games, I can tell he is serious when he Say's he loves you."

I sat in my stool just staring at Paul. I wanted to believe that was true so I just kept holding on to the hope he was giving me like a life line.

"Guy's like me don't just think about getting serious, Bell's. We either go all in or keep playing the game. He left the game when he found you and to be honest I think he should have a little more credit...he was honest and he could of lied...he could of lied to keep you but chose for you to know the whole truth instead."

I was nodding in agreement. He was right...Edward was honest when he could of lied. He really was trying to be what was expected in a relationship and I wasn't giving him the chance to do it with out fear of me leaving him for it.

I was so angry at myself. I looked at Paul and saw he had a grin across his face and I was curious to why it was there.

"What...?" I asked him

He shrugged his shoulders and grinned wider.

"Just that my number is higher and if I told you then Edward would look like a boy scout and you wouldnt ever feel the need to complain again."

I cringed and made a gagging noise to him as a reflection of my thoughts. He stood laughing and kissed my head.

"Call him...give him a chance before you write him off like that."

I nodded and walked him to the door. When I was alone again I grabbed my cell and dialed Edwards new number.


	16. Chapter 16

**EPOV (Lucky Man)**

I was still laying in my bed when my phone rang. I jumped to find it, only about a handful of people and the hospital had my number and one of them was Bella. I saw the gray Blackberry jumping around on my dresser and reached for it.

"Hello"

"Edward...It's Bella..."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I wanted it to be her so bad, but wasn't planning on it actually being her. I sat on my bed to talk to her.

"Hey, is everything okay?"

I didn't know what her reason for calling was and I didn't want to assume that it was to talk about what I admitted to yesterday. I was just glad she had my number and was using it.

"Yeah, um are you working today by chance?" She sounded so hesitant and unsure of herself and I felt bad for being the reason she did. I just wanted to hold her to me once again and make this nightmare go away.

"No, Ba...I mean Bella. I took today off as well in case you wanted to do anything...um well I did it before last night actually."

Just one more reminder of the fucked up scenario that was my life.

"Actually, that's why I was calling you...would you like to get together today...to talk?"

I felt my heart again and I took a deep cleansing breath and breathed out a longing yes. I wanted nothing more than to make sense of this and start new again. She and I had a lot to work through and I was willing to make the effort.

We made plans to meet in the park in an hour and just relax while we had our conversation.

Almost immediately after I got off the phone with Bella, I had a plan forming in my head. I took a quick shower and dressed in haste. I grabbed my wallet and keys and headed for the market. I bought an entire lunch and basket filled with all the necessities I would need for my grand gesture. After a quick call to Alice and forty minutes to spare, I pulled up to _Tiffany's._

I stepped from my car and made my way in. Alice was waiting for me with an attendant ready with three trays in front of her on the counter. I kissed her head quickly and looked to the rings in front of me. I looked at them intently but only one popped out at me.

I had it boxed and paid for with in minutes and headed to the park. I was there setting out our lunch when I heard a soft _hello_ from behind me.

I turned and saw Bella standing there, she was so beautiful it actually hurt. She was wearing a blue summer dress that stopped mid calf and hugged her body carefully. She was holding her sandals in her hand and standing before me barefoot and gorgeous.

I stepped to her to embrace her and stopped short. I didn't know if she would want me to, so I just held still where I was. I went to say something but was stopped when she flew into my arms and clutched onto my neck. I held her back tightly to me and just breathed her in.

"I'm sorry Edward...I was so stupid last night...I was jealous." She was sniffling and holding me tighter.

I ran my hands through her hair and pulled back to kiss her. We stayed that way for minutes and then finally pulled away from one another.

"Bella, let's sit and talk okay?" I had a small smile on my lips now because I was relieved that she had wanted to be here with me as much as I had her. I never released her hand and helped her to sit on the blanket.

She took in our surroundings and huffed air out with a smile. She turned to me and started crying again.

"I'm being horrible and taking all my insecurities out on you...and your trying so hard still...why do you even put up with it?"

I was shaking my head now and leaned my forehead into hers. Her logic was backwards...I had done the messing up and she had been the one sticking around.

"No Bella...its all justified, we just haven't done a great job communicating to each other. I'm sorry you felt that way last night, but I truly did mean everything I said when I told you that the way I am with you is a first. No one has ever touched my heart like you have...no ones even come close..."

I kissed her lightly and sat back.

"Are you hungry?" I gestured toward the basket and she nodded with a bright smile as she saw I had brought food.

We sat and ate our lunch together on our blanket and watched the people come and go around us. I had champagne and juice to make us mimosas while we took in the summers afternoon greedily and shared our silence.

When our food was done we lay back and watched the clouds over our heads. I wanted to start, but where to begin was my question. I just waited patiently until I felt the right moment over take me.

"I never longed for what my parents had...I don't know why, but I never wanted it. At least I didn't think I did. I dated around in college, but had nothing serious. I liked it that way...I was always surrounded by girls looking for their future husband with a great career and the thought of being part of someones game plan wasn't very appealing."

I didn't chance a look at her, but I could feel her eye's on me as I continued.

When I started my residency, I had very little time for anything, I didn't even see my family. I would meet my friends out and on occasion end up with someone for the night. I didn't want more and neither did they...I figured it was harmless as long as it continued that way...so it did. I'm not proud of it, Bella. And you know what happened with Tanya."

I closed my eyes when I said her name. It invoked anger in me like I had never known and I wanted nothing more than to yell or throw something because of it. I felt Bella's hand on my cheek and I opened my eyes to her. She leaned down and kissed my eyes then my lips and sat back.

She knew I was angry and she did that to calm me. I loved her more for it...

"Can I ask you a personal question...?" Her voice was low and it was kind. I nodded yes for her to ask.

"When we met that night, did you plan on having the same kind of night with me as the others?"

Her face was curious but not angry anymore. She just simply wanted to know.

"No, Bella...when I saw you standing there my breath literally stopped and I had to touch you...not in some sick way, but it was stronger than the part of me that wanted anything else...I was drawn to you and I knew that I wanted to know you forever..."

I kept my eyes locked on hers as I told her more.

"When you kissed me Bella...God, I could feel my life shifting. I knew that I wanted you for more than just that...it was always more than that with you. I just couldn't help myself that night when we sat with each other. I held you and touched you as if you were mine because in my head I could see it all so clearly and I wanted it so badly."

She had tears in her eyes as she nodded her head in agreement.

"I never meant for it to go so far, but it did...and I don't regret it. What I do regret was not being honest with you about my situation...I wish with everything I am that I could change it, but at the same time I wouldn't want to change that night or the morning after when I woke up with you in my arms...it was everything I didn't know I wanted and more."

Bella was crying silent tears as I continued and I wiped them away with my thumbs.

"I'd never stayed all night with a woman Bella...that was something very new. I wanted it like a drug after that one time...I knew I would never be able to let you go."

I wanted to know more from her now...I wanted to know what it was she was working toward someday.

"Bella, what is it you want from life?" It was a vague question I'm sure, but I needed to know if we had wanted the same things from each other.

I turned my head to look at her and saw a smile playing at her lips with her tears.

"I want to be married and have a baby...maybe two. I want to vacation twice a year and eat out every Sunday." She said it all so longingly like she didn't think it would happen...her stare was on the sky but her head was elsewhere. I reached over and grabbed her hand in my own. I kissed it and just stared at her form.

"Where do you want to live?"

She thought about it for a moment then said something unexpected.

"Wherever our family is..." I felt my chest tighten at her insinuation. She said _our_ family...she dreamed of us having and being those things to each other and my heart almost burst from the joy it brought me.

I sat up and looked down at her. She was staring off into the sky still when I asked her what she wanted from me.

"I'm done fighting us Edward...I love you. I haven't been very fair to you and through it all you have been trying your hardest to make me happy, I wont do that to you anymore..."

I wanted to take her right then and make love to her, but I couldn't...we were in public. Instead I settled for pulling her to me and having her sit between my legs.

I pressed my cheek to her hair as she nestled her back against my chest.

"I'm the one screwing up here Bella...I don't know whats going on with me...but I want to fix it...for you, for us, for all the things you want."

I kissed her cheek and she brought her hands to my own and joined them with hers in her lap. I was in heaven when I whispered into her ear.

"I can be all those things you want, love...I can give you all those things and more...I want to."

She turned to me and took a deep breath.

"I would like that someday, Edward...very much"

I kissed her tears and then her lips before asking her, "Bella...would you like some desert?"

She kissed my cheek before saying "_yes."_

I reached over with her still in my arms and pulled a little blue box from the basket and placed it in her hands.

She turned her body so she was facing me between my legs and just stared for a moment with question in her eyes. I smiled to her and kissed her forehead.

"Open it, baby..."

Her little hands were shaking as she unwrapped the box and pulled the lid off. I saw her pop her head up and stare at me when she saw the little box inside.

I took this moment to tell her exactly what I wanted.

"Bella, I love you baby...your it...I know that we have things to get past and if you'll let me I want to do it with a commitment to you...to us. Its not an engagement ring, but it holds the same purpose in my eyes. I just want you to know that we belong only to each other and that were working toward the same goal _together_."

It was a Blue Sapphire princess cut ring with diamonds surrounding the stone and lining the band.

I pulled the ring from the box and placed it on her left hand. "It's another first love...I've never given a woman jewelry or a diamond...your the only one who will ever get these things from me."

She let me slide it on her hand and just sat admiring it on her finger before she spoke up.

"Edward...it's beautiful...it looks so expensive though...I love the gesture...but the ring is too much money, I-I cant accept this."

She was worried about the money of course. It's just one small reason I loved her so much...she didn't need expensive things as symbols for love and I anticipated her reaction as one of two ways. Happiness but reluctance to take it because of price, or anger at my thinking she would want me anymore. In the case of an alternative I was happy to accept her reluctance.

I smiled at her and shook my head no.

"This is just your commitment ring love...wait to complain until I give you your engagement band."

I winked and she looked at me with a smile and her mouth open. I just laughed and kissed her nose.

"So will you wear my ring, Bella? Will you be mine love?"

She smiled and nodded to me as she threw her arms around my neck and kissed me hard.

When we had finished the picnic and ate all the dessert, we packed up and headed for my place. I needed to get clothes for tomorrow so I could leave from Bella's and go to the hospital. When we were in the car and on the road, Bella asked a question.

"Was it because of Tanya you never invited me to your place?" She didn't sound angry, just curious.

I furrowed my brow as I thought about it for a moment. I didn't realize she had never been over and that thought had never occurred to me before. I looked at her and noticed her watching me with curiosity toward my expression, so I answered honestly.

"Bella, I guess I never realized it but it had never crossed my mind...I always enjoyed coming to you because we made really great memories at your place." I winked and continued.

"Tanya wasn't the problem, at least I don't think that was it...I just always felt so at home with you that I figured where you were was where I needed to be, not the other way around."

She smirked and stared at her ring for a moment before she spoke up again.

"Um...can I ask why you never thought to use protection with me...?" she trailed off and had a grin on her face. I felt the heat rise to my face at having to admit to why.

"Well...honestly? I didn't want anything between me feeling you completely around me...and....well I just wanted to let fate be...honestly Bella if you told me right now you were pregnant I would be elated."

Her mouth was open and her eyes were wide as she stared at me. I just kept my eyes on the road but grabbed her hand and rubbed her ring. It was the truth...I would have been over the moon to have Bella carrying our baby. It would give me a reason to make her mine fully and sooner.

I heard her laughing and she started shaking her head.

When we pulled in to the building I parked and walked around to help her out. We made our way through the lobby and I introduced her to the door man so he would know to just let her up whenever...even if I was out.

We were making out like teenagers in the elevator until we heard the ding announcing my floor and exited. I was in a hurry to take her in my room or wherever she wanted and show her just how much I loved her.

As I went to unlock my door I noticed it was already open. I guess I forgot to lock up before I left in haste. When we entered we both stood completely still, because in my home was Tanya.

It hit me then that I had never gotten her key back.

Immediately I started yelling for her to get the hell out.

"What the fuck are you doing in here?! Get the hell out of here!" I didn't trust myself not to hit her...I didn't believe in that kind of thing, but when it came to what she did to Bella, I wasn't sure I would have the restraint to hold back.

Before I could say anything else, Bella was in front of me and squaring off with Tanya. I grabbed her hand to pull her back, but she stayed where she was.

"Tanya, I think its best if you leave. _Now._" Bella's tone was calm and held no anger, she simply made her statement and waited.

"_This_ is non of your business you little tramp! Edward and I have a relationship to salvage and we don't need you here getting in our way!"

She moved to Bella and went to grab her arms, but I stepped in now. I didnt care if I was arrested or sent to jail, I slapped her hands away and glared at her. I went to stand in front of Bella but she was just as determined.

She stood her ground and moved up further to Tanya.

"Look here...I'm sorry you feel like you were cheated and that your owed something here but _this_ is ridiculous!"

Bella was gesturing from me to her and Tanya again.

"Pride is free Tanya...get some!"

"Fuck you! You think your so much better than me do you? Just wait until he replaces you with whatever trash he finds after he's done with you...then you'll be no better than me."

Tanya had a grin in her face and I had already dialed the police. I was ready to tell her off but Bella spoke up in a sweet but deadly tone.

"Aww Tanya, I'm already better than you...I have a ring to prove it."

She held her hand out and dangled her ring in front of her face. If I thought I had seen Tanya pissed before, then it was nothing compared to what she was now.

She looked from me to Bella and her eyes went wide.

"See Tanya, I don't have to pretend to be some victim to get a man...and just so you know the whole "_desperate" _act sets us women back like fifty years...just...please find some self respect when you leave here...because I'm embarrassed for you."

Tanya pulled back to slap her, but Bella was faster. She slapped her first and then screamed in her face.

"Get the hell out of my home and out of our lives!"

Just at that moment a nice young man in uniform came in and took her away from us for what I could only hope was the final time.

* * *

When the statements were written and the cops had left, I sat on my couch and pulled Bella into my arms.

She came willingly and rested her head against my chest.

"I love you.." She said.

I kissed her head and held her ringed finger before whispering into her ear, "I love you too, baby."

We sat in silence as we let the drama settle. I felt her body shaking and I thought she was crying. I pulled her up and sat facing her.

"Baby, what is it? Are you okay?"

I was kissing her head and running my hands through her hair. I didn't want her to be going back in her mind and regretting our declaration. But when she looked into my eyes, I saw she had been laughing and her tears were happy.

She was trying to talk between gasps for air.

"Did you see her face when I showed her my ring?! It was priceless...Oh my gosh... I wish I had a picture of it!"

I was laughing with her now too...it was more out of relief that she wasn't re-thinking everything, but then I thought of Tanya's face while she saw the ring and couldn't help but laugh too.

We continued on that way for a bit longer and then the laughter died down. I pulled her face to mine and kissed her slowly. I wanted her more now that she was in the mind set of being mine forever.

I pulled back and went to pull her with me, but she stopped me and shook her head.

"Not here...just...not here okay? Her face was worried and I tried to understand why she changed her mood all of a sudden. I didn't have to wait long to find out.

"It's just that...well she's been in that bed in my place...lets just go to my home okay?"

I kissed her face and nodded but a grin came across me before we left.

"What?" she asked with humor

"Nothing...just that you told her to get out of _your home _and _our _life. I liked that you claimed this as your home..."

She smiled and pulled herself close to my body and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"Well...my home is where you are..."

I smiled and kissed her passionately before leaving for her place in hast to make love all night long.


	17. Chapter 17

**BPOV (One Fine Wire)**

I woke up sometime in the night to find Edward sitting on the edge of the bed. I sat up and called out to him to come back to me.

I watched him stand and walk around the bed. When he was next to me, he leaned down and kissed me, but something was off about it.

"Go back to sleep, Bella. I am getting ready to head to the hospital, love. They just called me."

I was still groggy from the sleep, but I was steeling myself to wake up quicker so I could make him something to eat before he left. He was watching me with a furrowed brow as I fought the sleep that was threatening to take me over.

I sat up and pushed the covers off me, but he stopped me from standing.

"Baby, what are you doing? Go back to bed...you gotta work in the morning." He was pulling the covers over me before I could protest, but then my reflexes woke up and I was aware again.

"No, Edward...I'm not going to the office until my bruise fades...the last thing I need is rumors going around that you're beating me."

He huffed out a deep breath and brought his hand gently to my cheek. He was shaking his head as he examined the bruise and cuts Tanya left me as a memento from our encounter.

"I'm sorry baby...I hate that you have to hide like this from your job. Are they going to give you a hard time about it? Do you need a doctor's note?"

He had a grin when he said that last part. I just giggled and shook my head.

"No, we all usually come and go from the office anyway. So working from home is something that's the norm in my industry."

Edward was nodding his understanding and his hand had begun wondering from my cheek to my neck and was slowly dipping lower to my chest.

I could not help the breathy way I asked him, "What time does your shift start...?"

I did not get an answer, however I did get a kiss to my lips and before I knew it Edward was laying me back gently and his body was aligned with mine.

I did not fight it...I wanted him again and if he was willing to give me himself then I was not about to protest.

I felt him enter me in one smooth motion and I gasped at the sensation of him filling me so completely. I was lost in the rocking motions when I heard him talking low into my ear.

"God baby, I can't get enough of you...I don't know how to tame it." He pushed harder into me and was gripping my left thigh while his free arm was hooked around my shoulder pulling me deeper with each thrust.

I could only hold him tighter and wrap my free leg around him to encourage it. I did not ever want him to tame the way he loved me. I ached for his touch even when I was being ridiculous and trying to push him away.

I tried to tell him that but my words were lost in the moans and cries that were coming from this moment of passion.

"Come here baby..." He pulled me up, while we were still joined, and sat me on his lap. This was becoming our position very quickly and I could not have been more pleased. I could feel him deep in me and the way his hips would angle, allowed him to touch my g-spot with every stroke. It felt so good that it made my toes curl. I gripped on to his shoulders and rocked harder and faster with him. I needed my release so badly it was almost painful.

I felt my body tightening and then with a last deep thrust and a long kiss I came with force over him. He gripped on to me as well and released into me as I nibbled on his lips.

We both just sat there, still connected, kissing and nipping at each other's mouths while we came down. All too soon, Edward was laying me back and kissing my mouth one last time.

"I want you to rest, love." He kissed me and pulled back to look at me in the eyes again

"I don't want to leave you but I have to start getting ready...just relax love. That's all you need to do now."

He kissed me softly and I felt him slowly pull out of me and then made his way to the bathroom, when he shut the door I shut my eyes.

I woke up to the sun shining and an empty bed. I sat up quickly and nervous, I was beginning to wonder if it was a dream that I had.

I looked around and saw no sign of Edward, but then I brought my left hand up to my face and saw the shining sapphire and diamonds sitting there and I instantly relaxed. It was real...we talked and made love...he gave me his word and his commitment.

I flopped back on the bed with a smile plastered to my face. I held my hand up again to admire the shimmers in the sunlight. It was beautiful...I was on cloud nine, as I lay there looking at my ring and remembering all the ways, he brought me to the pleasure and back repeatedly last night.

I rolled over to smell his pillow and my face was met with a rustling sound. I looked to see what it was and then saw a paper folded with my name written in beautiful script.

_Bella,_

_I have to work about thirty-two hours straight. I'm sorry I wont be there with you in the morning to hold and kiss you...just know that I want to be and that I will be thinking of you the entire time I am away. I will call you later my love._

_All my love,_

_Edward_

I smiled as I re-read it over and over again. I was a fool to think that I could really walk away from him. I still felt a little small about his past, but he was young, good looking and a doctor. He was bound to have a past.

I shook my head from the thoughts before I could get depressed. I got up to take a shower and start some work.

I started the water and went to grab some fresh towels, when I walked back in the bathroom, it was filled with fog and the glass to the shower was clouded. I stepped forward to get in, but words caught my eye as I went to grab the handle

There on the door written with fingertips were the words, _I love you Bella_. Edward must have done it this morning while he was showering. I was giddy with passion and joy while I admired it in the shower. He loved me, and he wanted me...no matter who he had in the past, he had given _me_ a ring and committed himself to _this_ relationship. It was enough to calm my jealous nerves.

When I had stepped from my shower and into my room, I began to see it all differently. I imagined waking up with Edward every morning and finding little notes or reminders of him through out the place. I wanted it, more than I had really expected myself to at this point.

Finally, I was dressed and I forced myself to snap out of my dream like state to get some work done.

I settled into my desk and opened up my laptop. When I did, I found another few pieces of paper folded up nicely on the keyboard. My name was written across the middle so I opened it.

It was filled with pictures and details of house listing in Chicago. I was confused for a moment while I tried to make sense of it, but then I reached the bottom of the third page and saw that Edward had written me some notes.

_Bella,_

_The first page has listings of condos still in the area, but are close to your office and only about twenty minutes further for me._

_The second page has listings of houses that are closer to the hospital but farther for you._

_The third page has listings of houses in neighborhoods that are closest to the best schools. Neither of us gets a break in the drive._

_You pick the one you like...or if you find something completely different, let me know. The choice is all yours love._

_Edward_

I sat there holding the papers with my jaw open. I couldn't believe he did that...when did he do that? I wanted to cry and laugh. Was he serious? Was he asking me to move in with him? I had about forty different questions running through my head when I heard my phone chirp.

I looked at the screen and saw that Edward had sent me a message.

_are you up love?_

I typed a quick yes... and waited for his response.

As I was staring at the screen, Edwards name popped up while it started shaking in my hand. It startled me and I almost dropped it... I hit talk.

"Hey!"

I was excited and nervous at the same time. I wasn't sure how to ask what this all meant, but luckily I didn't have to.

"Hey love, have you found my notes?" He sounded hopeful and a little nervous too, and it made me feel better that he was feeling just like I was.

"Uh yeah...so tell me, what exactly do you want me to pick?" I was teasing him now. My voice was obvious and I had a grin on my face that I had no idea where it came from.

"Well..." He exhaled a big puff of air and began.

"I know you don't feel comfortable staying or being at my place right now, and I certainly wont be able to not have you with me whenever humanly possible...so I figured I could find a new place...for us."

I was quiet for a minute while I let his words settle.

"You want a new house for us to live in together, or by yourself?" I was still a bit confused, he had not really asked me to live with him, and I did not want to just assume...there is the whole saying that goes with that.

"I want you with me always, Bella. I want you to live with me if you want to, I want you to stay the night whenever you want if that's easier for you...I just want you."

I could feel the tears in my eyes pooling over the edges, I had to fight hard to keep them from falling, but he continued.

"I want you to pick it Bella...because when we get married, I want you to be at home already. I want you to love that house and make it your own with me. It will be ours and ours alone, and no one will have ever been in your place there."

That did it. The tears were falling over with a fury and I did not know how to stop it.

"Oh Edward...I don't want you to feel like you have to get a new place...I'm sure with time I'll get over it and I'll be fine with being there. You don't have to do this."

He was quick with his response.

"Yes Bella. I do. I want to, I want us to work and the best way to make that happen is to ensure that you always feel comfortable and relaxed when you are with me. You will not be if you are constantly looking around a home that was occupied by someone who had hurt us both so much. I need this as much as you...It all goes...furniture and all! I'm starting fresh and I would really like it if you did this with me...please say yes."

I was overwhelmed. He was right; I would always feel uncomfortable being in that place knowing that Tanya had cooked in that kitchen. Moreover, the bed...well I would not be able to sleep in that bed. It was probably immature and stupid, but it was part of who I was and the truth of the matter is that I would have been uncomfortable and it would of caused us problems in the long run.

"Let me think about this...okay? Either way I want to help you find your new home but whether or not I live there is going to take me some time to figure out. Okay?"

He was quiet for a moment but when he answered, he sounded excited.

"Okay, Love! No pressure...I'll be here waiting as long as you need!"

"I love you Edward...I missed you this morning when I woke up...I almost thought I had dreamt yesterday, but then I saw this ring...and...I was happy again."

I wanted him to know how much yesterday had meant to me. I loved the ring, but even without it, I would have been over the moon. He was doing everything he could to prove to me his love and I was now willing to let him without judgment.

"I love you to baby...I miss you so much... I can't wait to hold you again..."

I was about to get just as mushy, but he said he had to go and it sounded urgent, so I did not put up a fight.

When we hung up I began pulling up all the listings and taking virtual tours...Immediately I was put off by the prices of these homes and I stopped where I was. I knew this would be his home, but if I were to live there then I would need to pay half and I was not in the position to do it. I felt my heart break a little at the fact that money would now be the deciding factor in my decision...and not what I wanted.

This was something I had not really thought of, but it was a reality for me. Edward had money and it did not seem to be a problem for him to pull up these listings and have them as options for a future home, but I was not that way. In fact, I was the exact opposite. I worked hard through high school to get good grades that would get me into Yale; once I was there, I took endless amounts of student loans and grant money. I was always working odd jobs and whatever the school would get me for work-study.

When I graduated, I was able to live with a family friend to get on my feet and I saved all my money from the tribune to get my place. I lived comfortably, but not luxuriously. I was not ashamed, but I did not really know how to broach the subject with Edward and not make it sound pathetic.

I did not get much searching done after that and my newfound excitement was now gone. I was not sure that Edward would be interested in looking for something more in my range if I decided to move in with him, but that was a completely different worry. I first had to decide if this was the best move for us or not.

It felt too soon, and I could tell that he was not really thinking this through fully. I mean look what happened with Tanya. I did not want us to end up hating each other and being spiteful...I like what we had going and the fact that we were just now finding it meant something too. I was thinking way too much and not working, so I got up and put the papers away so I could focus on my story.

This would have to wait until we could talk it through together.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter song theme: Lucky- Jason Mraz**

Thanks to my wonderful Beta Tina (rangernstephfan) I have got this chapter where it needed to be. If your not liking it at this point and see it going a different way..let me know! I enjoy ALL the reviews I get and try to put in whats given to me!

Thanks again Tina!

CC

* * *

**EPOV (Lucky)**

After we had arrived at Bella's, I made love to her over and over until the early hours of the morning. We would fall asleep after and then one of us would wake the other to get started again.

I had needed her so much. Every time had gotten better than the last and I could not be sated.

The other thing is that the more we came together, the more I realized that I did not ever want to part from her again.

I was realistic though, I knew we both had jobs and that with mine; it would be especially hard to keep any kind of steady schedule. I instantly regretted deciding to be a surgeon. I actually was entertaining the thoughts of switching fields, but stopped as soon as I realized I would have to start my residency over.

I could stick this out...I only had until the end of the year, and it would be done. September was rolling around the corner in just a week and the next few months would fly by too, hopefully.

Bella was stirring in my arms and I kissed her head to calm her. She relaxed into my arms and mumbled something that sounded like pens.

I just chuckled and held her closer.

I tried getting back to sleep, but I could not. I started thinking about the next thirty-two hours that I would be away from Bella and it triggered me thinking of all the other times I would need to be away from her as well.

She was not comfortable at my place, which meant she would not be coming over to stay with me after those long shifts. I wanted her with me...but how to get her to see past _my past _and make herself at home there was beyond me.

Short of buying a new place, I was at a loss of what to do. I sat there and held her closer to me again, but when I did, she brought her hand up to my chest and rubbed it gently with her hand. When I smiled down at her, her ring caught my eye.

It was all real. She was wearing my ring, which meant she made a commitment to me, just as I had to her. She did not argue about the ring and she was happy.

I knew then that buying a new place was exactly what I needed to do. I owed her that much after she had forgiven me. I would spare nothing to make her happy and comfortable, the way it was supposed to be. I gave her a Ring and my word and this was the first chance I had to prove it was all true.

I kissed her forehead one last time and slid carefully out of bed. I grabbed my shorts and made my way down the hall to the kitchen. I opened up her laptop and began my search at that moment.

I found dozens of places that were nice enough for Bella, I did not care how far I had to drive to get to the hospital, and it would be worth it to know she was happy and comfortable waiting for me back home.

_Whoa, I just thought of her living with me...I had only meant for her to be comfortable while visiting, but now I realized what it was I was actually looking for._

These were homes not condos or lofts. They had yards and land and bar-b-q pits. This was what my parents lived in when we grew up and what they had built once we settled on a school and dad at a hospital.

I suddenly found myself aching for all the things my parents had for the first time in my life. I guess it is the fact that it was Bella, I had to imagine these things with now, that I did, and I wanted it.

I wanted to live near the good schools and have the nicest yard on the block. Suddenly I did not want my sports car or any of the things that occupied my home right now. I wanted to start new...and I wanted to start with Bella.

I grabbed the laptop and carried it into her office. I printed the pages I thought she would most like to see, and then left her some notes. If she did not want any of these then I was fine with whatever she did see and like. I would happily live in a shanty if it meant that she was with me.

I folded up the papers and placed them on the keyboard of her laptop. I figured I would let her find them when she got around to opening up her laptop that evening.

The fact that I was a bit of a coward was a factor too, but at least the gesture was there. Just as I had closed the laptop, I heard my phone ringing down the hall. I ran in and grabbed it before it could wake Bella.

It was the hospital and they needed me to come in within the next two hours. A surgery had been moved up, that I was to assist with. I hung up and prepared myself to leave Bella.

When I sat down on the edge of the bed, I felt my nerves getting the best of me.

What will happen if she did not want all this right now? What if I scared the hell out of her with this instead of pleased her. I was just thankful she accepted the ring for what it was and did not run from me...but was I pushing my luck with this move? When it came to Bella, was I ever right? I did not think so.

I was pondering all these things when I heard her call out to me to come back to her.

I did not hesitate to make my way to her. I kissed her lightly because I was scared my desperation for her would pour out of anything more.

I told her I had to leave for the hospital soon and that I was just waking up. She kept trying to get out of bed but I stopped her and made her lay back down.

Knowing Bella she was trying to be up to see me off, as much as it filled my heart that she wanted to be with me I could not let her. She had a job too and she needed to sleep...we hadn't exactly been resting all too much that night and she would need what little she did get.

When she looked back in my eyes, I could see she had regained her consciousness and was alert now. She told me, she was not going in the office until her bruise faded because she did not want people thinking she had been abused.

I was angry all over again as I looked at her beautiful cheek marred by that cu...I mean sick person.

I could not help that my hands were beginning to wonder over her and when she asked me what time I had to be at the hospital in her breathy voice, I knew that we were on the same page.

I needed her again like a drug. She was the only thing that mattered to me and I only felt whole when I was with her.

I laid her back and made my way back home. I told her how I needed her and how I did not know how to control it...I didn't. She was exactly, what my body had craved and ached for, having her in my arms made everything wrong in my life, right.

I thought I was alone in the feeling, but she held me tighter as I pushed us further toward the edge. She draped her long leg around my hip and squeezed me to her more firmly as if she could not get close enough. I understood, because as close as we were...I needed more.

I would always need her, but in that moment, I was desperate to feel her love all around me. I pulled her onto my lap and instantly rewarded with the depths of her body engulfing me. I could not talk, I could only move.

Bella clutched me tighter and held my head to her face as she began to tighten around me. I knew she was close and so was I. We were the same...we were meant to be joined this way. The rightness of it all came crashing down on me again as I kissed her with all the emotions I had been trying to understand earlier and I felt her release over my length.

She shook with the force of it and I was sent over the edge right after her. I felt euphoric as she nibbled and caressed my lips while I came. It was the most amazing feeling, it felt as if she had been consuming me and now was relishing the taste of me.

I continued to kiss her and then knew I needed to part from her. I was reluctant to do it but I lay her back and gently pulled myself away from her body. I felt empty immediately after.

I asked her to rest and sleep...I wanted her to focus on that and nothing else.

I reluctantly left her side and made my way into the bathroom to take a shower. When the water was ready, I stepped in and let the heat take me. I was happiest when I was near Bella, and right now, I could still feel the heat from her body all over me. I must have looked like a fool with the grin plastered on my face, but I did not care.

I was still day dreaming of all the ways we had made love earlier when the water started giving out. I shut the tap and went to reach for the door, when I saw it was fogged over I smiled and wrote, I love you Bella. I hoped that when she awoke she would see it when she got in the shower.

I dressed and made my way out to her bedroom and when I did my heart almost stopped. Bella was draped over my side of the bed and clutching my pillow to her body. She was naked and glorious. Her body looked as gorgeous as the dim light of the bathroom shined out to her, and once again, he ring sparkled and shined.

I did not want to leave...I wanted to be next to her and clutched to her body, but I had to go. I grabbed a piece of paper and wrote her a note. I wanted her to know, I had not just left without thinking to tell her, when in all actuality I had wanted to strip back down and lay beside her again.

With one final look, I made my way off to work. I did not trust kissing her, in the chance she would wake up and I would not be able to stop from taking her again.

My morning was long. I kept looking at the clock while I was in surgery hoping that by some miracle Bella would call or send a text. It had only been five hours, but I was missing her again. I needed to at least, talk to her.

I made myself focus on what was going on around me and then helped close up. When I finished surgery, I made my way to clean-up and then outside for a quick break. I grabbed my phone from my coat and hit 2 for Bella.

"Hey" she said excitedly.

My heart did a summersault at her happiness to hear from me and I wore that stupid smile again. Suddenly my patience had worn out and I blurted out what had been eating at me all morning.

"Hey love, have you found my notes?" I instantly regretted the words when I had said them, but then I heard her teasing me.

"Uh yeah...so tell me, what exactly do you want me to pick?"

She was being smart and I loved it. I did not care at this point if I sounded desperate or stupid, the fact is that I had been hiding my true feelings long enough when it concerned Bella, and I was not about to let myself do that anymore.

I said everything that was in my mind and heart.

"Well...I know you don't feel comfortable staying or being at my place right now, and I certainly won't be able to not have you with me whenever humanly possible...so I figured I could find a new place...for us."

There it was all on the table now, what she felt about it, would be revealed soon.

She was quiet for a moment and then she said, "You want a new house for _us_ to live in_ together_, or by yourself?"

She sounded unsure of what my words had meant, so I decided to spell it out for her.

"I want you with me always, Bella. I want you to live with me if you want, I want you to stay the night whenever you want if that's easier for you...I just want you..."

I had to keep going so she would understand fully.

"I want you to pick it Bella...because when we get married, I want you to be at home already. I want you to love that house and make it your own with me. It will be ours and ours alone, and no one will have ever been in your place there."

This was our new beginning. It is what I had been praying for and wishing to everything holy, that she would let me give her. It would be our home...even if she did not live with me now, I intended to make her a Cullen and then it would truly be hers one day.

She tried to assure me that she would be fine over time, but I did not want to hear it. The more I thought of having a new place and Bella picking it as our new home...the better it sounded. I really did need a place that had no reminders of the past and I was anxious to make it a reality.

She agreed to think seriously about it, and that was enough for now.

We went on about how much we missed each other, but we were interrupted when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned and saw my father behind me with a smirk on his face.

"I gotta go baby, I'll call you later okay, love?"

"Okay, Edward. Bye"

I hung up and put the phone back in my coat. I looked up and saw my dad was still there waiting to speak with me so I gave him my attention.

"Hey dad..." I tried egging him into his talk, but he was still just standing there grinning at me.

"What?" I asked laughing a little.

"Just couldn't help overhear a little of your conversation there...so that was Bella right?"

His smile faded and he had a look of concern.

"Yes...it was. I am not screwing this up again dad. I promise."

He smiled again and nodded his head in agreement.

"Good. I'm really happy that you two have been able to get over the troubles that were plaguing you."

His brow furrowed and then he asked, "By the way...what was the deal with Tanya coming down here demanding to speak with either of us? Please tell me she isn't in any trouble that concerns you, Edward...that would kill Bella now."

I answered back quickly.

"Absolutely not...I have no idea why she came here, but she won't be a problem anymore. The police picked her up yesterday when she showed up in my condo."

I was rolling my eyes and my voice was dripping with sarcasm. My dads face was shocked but he did not ask. I just raised my hand as to motion for the topic to end and he dropped it.

"Well...as long as everyone's okay and doing well, then that's really all that matters I guess."

I wanted to talk to him though, I wanted to tell him of all the developments with Bella and get his advice. I just did not want to do it here.

"Dad, um could we get together this week? I have some things I'd like to share with you and get your advice on."

My dad looked at me as if I told him I won the lottery. He recovered quickly and nodded yes enthusiastically.

"Absolutely...when are you off next?" He asked.

"Well, I have twelve hours off on Wednesday and Bella should be working most of the day, so could we grab some lunch?"

"Wednesday it is then."

He smiled and slapped my back before walking back into the hospital. I stood there for a minute just taking in the latest developments and just being thankful. I was happier than I had ever been and I never wanted this feeling to end.

I made my way back into the hospital and began to chip away at the remaining twenty-seven hours I had left in this shift.

__________________________________________________________________________

When it was finally over, I grabbed my things and headed for my place. I did not want to, but it was just after three am and I did not want to wake Bella to ask if I could be with her at her place. I knew she had been working on lots of different things and was tired, so I made my way towards home.

I had just pulled on the freeway when my phone chirped. I looked and saw Bella had just text me.

Is your shift over now, love?

I smiled at the endearment and hit 2 to call her. I had my Bluetooth in and waited for her to answer.

"There you are...is your shift over now?" She sounded sleepy but hopeful.

"Yes baby...I'm finally done. Were you sleeping?"

I heard her yawn and then answer.

"Yeah, but I set an alarm to wake me when your shift would be ending so I could talk to you."

My heart almost burst with love for this woman.

"Baby, go to sleep. I'll talk to you in the morning...okay?"

I did not want to hang up, but I was not going to be selfish and keep her on the phone at this hour.

"Um...I was hoping you would come over and sleep here...I miss you."

I had already pulled off the nearest exit before I responded.

"I'm on my way to you love...I'll be there soon."

We hung up and I made my way to her place. When I pulled into the garage, I parked next to her car and hit the code for her elevator.

I was on her floor and walking down the hall to her door when I saw her peak her head out. I smiled and stepped faster in her direction.

I picked her up bridal style and locked the door behind me then carried her to bed.


	19. Chapter 19

**Songs for this chapter:**

**The Pogues- Love You Til The End**

Thanks Tina for being the Beta to this story! I like how you let me bounce ideas off your head...its very much appreciated! everyone else...thanks for reading. There are still about 6 or 7 chapters left... the ending has various different options and they are all written...I'll base it off the thoughts and requests I get. Thanks again for reading!

* * *

**EPOV (Love You Til The End)**

We were too exhausted to do anything but hold each other and sleep. We kissed for a while and then Bella placed her head on my chest and fell into a peaceful slumber. I followed right after with the entrancing scent that was she.

When I had woken later that morning, I saw that the clock read 11:26am. I yawned and stretched before sitting up to look for Bella. I grabbed my shorts and made my way onto the kitchen to look for her.

It was empty. I walked around the entire place and found all the rooms the same. I figured she must have gone into the office that day since her bruise was fading and at least coverable with make up, so I made my way to the shower to prepare for lunch with my dad.

When I walked in the bathroom I found a post it note on the mirror

_In the field today for an interview. I did not want to wake you, but I will miss you all day._

_Love, Bella_

I grabbed my note and smiled while I placed it in my wallet. It was the little things she did that made my heart ache for her. I always wanted her physically, but the love she showed me throughout the day is what really made my heart beat. I got in the shower and took my time. Since Bella was not here and I would not be spending time with her before I had to go to the hospital, I did not feel the need to rush.

When I was dressed and ready to leave, I made the bed and left her a note on her pillow. I wanted her to know that I missed her just as much. I exited the apartment and made sure the bottom lock was in place and then made my way to my car.

I was in a daze the whole drive to my place. I was lost in thoughts of Bella and I in our new home. I was imagining what it would be like to come home to her always and know we would be in the same place every day and night. There was something so fulfilling about just the thought and it only solidified my desire to have that vision as a reality.

I was pulled from the idea when I found myself parked in my garage. With a deep breath, I made my way upstairs to change. When I entered my place, I was hit with a wave of sadness.

I had never realized how empty it felt, but here in the light of day and fresh from Bella's warm and inviting home, suddenly my place did not feel all that great.

It was designed with minimalist taste. My taste. It had clean lines and looked like it really had not been _lived in._ There were no books out or notes and reminders. My place looked more like a museum than a home.

I decided then that I wanted Bella to pick every piece of furniture that would go in our home. I would be happy with how she decorated and feel at home instantly.

With that thought, I realized I had become my father. I started laughing to myself about the irony in all of this. I told Bella how I had never wanted what my parents had, and at the time it was true...but now, I sounded just like my dad.

My mother was more than just an architect and his wife she was his other half. The Ying to his Yang and most importantly the piece that completed him. Without her, he would be lost. Sure, he was smart and able to make good decisions, but he did everything for her. Therefore, if she were to no longer exist, his choices and thoughts would be filled with a void blank. I knew that feeling now. I had never understood it before, but now it made perfect sense.

I was dressed and ready to leave again, but I packed a bag this time in case Bella asked me to be with her again after this next 18 hours I had to face.

Just as I was getting in my car, my phone rang and I saw it was my dad calling.

"Hey dad, I'm just heading out...where do you want to eat?"

"Oh good, how about we go to _Expression_ on the top of the Hancock building? I like it and I haven't been there in a while..."

"Sounds good I'll see you in about thirty."

We hung up and I made my way to meet him. I was getting nervous about what I wanted to ask my dad, I did not think he would be upset. He obviously loved Bella and thought the world of her, but I was concerned he would not take _me_ seriously. I could not blame him though, after the crap I had pulled and the webs of hell I had put us _all_ through, it is easy to understand how he would not be able to take me seriously.

I arrived and made my way to the top. When I walked in I saw my dad in a secluded corner waiting for me and I went to join him.

I sat down and faced the only man whose opinion I greatly valued. I wanted him to be supportive, but I knew that whatever he gave me today as far as advice would be given from the heart and for all our best interest.

"Son..."

I took a deep breath and let a smile spread across my face. I could not help it, I was thinking of my Bella and it was a reflex action.

My dad started laughing and shaking his head with amusement then took a sip of his tea.

"You are a man in love aren't you?" He said in a knowing tone.

I just nodded and started laughing. Was it really that obvious to everyone? I did not care if it was; I just hoped Bella saw the same thing when she looked at me too.

"Dad, It's more than that...I can't explain it. She is my whole world and I cannot imagine her not in my life...Is there more than love out there? Cause if so, that's what I am."

My dad's eyes were wide and his eyebrows high while he wore my matching smile.

"Well if there is, son. Then that's what your mother and I have..."

I took a deep breath and prepared myself to begin.

"Dad, I have some things I'd like to share with you."

He just smiled and nodded his head in encouragement for me to continue.

"Well first off, Bella and I have had some very deep discussions recently. I've told her everything and she still by some miracle loves me."

He sat back to get comfortable and nodded again.

"And well...I gave her a ring dad."

My father sat up now and his face was shocked. Not angry or nervous, just shocked.

"Did she accept your proposal son?" He was on the edge of his seat and his voice sounded concerned.

"It wasn't an engagement ring...it was a commitment ring."

I saw his face fall a little and it made my nerves calm considerably. He loved Bella. We all did, and everyone would welcome having her in our family. I realized then how much she had affected our family with her presence.

"I want to propose dad...that's why I asked you here today."

My dad relaxed in his seat again; the smile he wore earlier was back in place. He just looked to me for a moment than began.

"Marriage is a big step, Edward. Do you think you are ready for that kind of commitment with Bella? Have you really thought that through?"

I just nodded as he went through the motions with me.

"I know it's a big step and we havent been together very long, but honestly dad, I cannot be without her...first, let me tell you the rest. I need your opinion on something just as big."

"Don't tell me I'm going to be a grandpa, Edward...if so...lets go to the house so your mom won't be angry she heard second."

There was no sign of anger, he actually sounded excited. I started laughing and shaking my head no.

"No, Dad. Not yet...but soon I hope."

He was laughing now. I had to sit back and wait for him to get composed. I was getting a little offended that he would laugh at that, and I was frowning at him the whole time.

"I'm sorry! Just that, I never thought this day would come...you have been so determined to keep people at bay while you did your residency and now your dreaming of marriage and babies...I'm just happy, Edward...not making fun of you."

I let out a breath I was holding and chuckled along with him. It was a bit funny when he put it that way. I did not care though...Bella is what I wanted and she made me happy; I wanted to give her all the things she told me she wanted.

Finally, my dad calmed down and I was able to continue.

"Okay, so first off I wanted to tell you I'm selling my place."

"Wow, what brought this on? You loved that place and the location..."

I laughed now. I was really throwing myself into this and I could not be happier.

"Well, _I did_ like it...before. Now, I cannot stand it. In addition, Bella does not feel comfortable staying with me there. So it has to go."

My dad was wearing that smile and looked amused at what I was telling him.

"And...I am going to buy a house. Where, I do not know yet, but it is going to be a home that Bella and I will share one day together. Somewhere close by, because Bella wants to be near the family."

My dad was on his seats edge again as he processed my words.

"Okay, so you and Bella are getting a house together? It sounds like you already did propose son...is she aware that it was not an engagement ring. Because if not, then I hate to break the news to you, but you're engaged."

He looked like he wanted to shake me, but not out of anger...out of frustration. He was worried I had led Bella to believe something other than my intention, so I had to make him understand.

"No, Dad. Bella knows it's a commitment ring...I told her that the engagement ring would be what follows."

He looked relieved and then relaxed instantly.

"So you want a house eh? Tell me Edward, why a house?"

I looked him square in the eye and confessed my desires.

"I asked her to move in with me...and she said she would think about it. Initially I just wanted to make her comfortable when she stayed over with me, That's why I was gonna move. But then I started looking at places and I found myself looking at _homes, _not condos. I had unconsciously been thinking of this avenue even before I realized it. I want this, Dad. So I went out on a limb and asked her to move in with me. When she agreed to think about it, I instantly wanted more. I feel like an addict who cant get enough of a drug."

I took another deep breath and continued.

"I gave her pages of homes to look at and I asked her to pick whichever one she liked. I don't care what she picks to be honest...I just want her with me in it."

"No, you care son." He smirked and then added, " You gave her pages of _houses _to look at, so I think she may get the hint. Can I ask why you want her to pick the house herself?"

I didn't hesitate to answer.

"Because I want it to be _her_ home when were married...Bella's and mine, even if she doesn't want to move in right now I want her to feel at peace whether we're at her place or mine. In addition, mostly I want her to see how serious I am about her. From this point, forward all my actions will be in preparation for our future together.

He was nodding his head as he listened to my reasons.

"Sounds like you know what you want, Son. So tell me, what do you need my advice with?"

"Well I wanted to ask your opinion on everything and see if you think I'm doing the right thing."

He sat back and took a deep breath before responding.

"When I met your mother Edward my life was upside down. I did not realize it at the time, but I was a shell of a man. I did not dream of half the things I have now before I met her. Anyway, I went to your grandfather after about three months and told him of my plans to make her my own. He told me it was too soon and that I was selling my youth short. "Go out and have some fun first" He said, "Then if at the end of it if you feel like she's the one...you should do it." I remember sitting there and thinking in my head that there was no way I would ever be able to see another woman the same as your mother...I could not even imagine it. Therefore, I shook his hand and told him thank you. Inwardly, I was furious with myself for putting my happiness in his hands. So I went ahead and asked her anyway...and you know what? He was wrong. I have had more happiness in my life than most people can comprehend in their years."

He took a drink again and sat back then said, "Only you can know what's right for you, Edward. I am going to tell you what I wish my father had said to me. _If she'll have you, then_ _I hope you two have a long and wonderful life together, I couldn't imagine anyone better to see you married to than Bella..."_

I sat there grateful for the man that was my father. I should have known he would say something like that. All the same, I appreciated it as much as another piece of advice he had given me regarding Bella.

"Thank you, Dad. That means so much to me."

We both sat there for a long moment in silence. Then he looked up and hesitantly started again

"Okay... now that we have the heavy stuff out of the way, let us get to the basics. What in gods name is the deal with Tanya?"

I groaned and dropped my head to the table and my father laughed again at me. This time he was getting a kick out of my discomfort.

We sat there for an hour and a half as I told him the twisted tale of Tanya and her deception. He was disgusted and then relieved that she had been apprehended by the police. He was worried she would attempt some kind of spiteful revenge that was far worse than attacking Bella or making scenes.

When our time had ended there, I paid the bill and we made our way down the elevator. Before we parted, he stopped me.

"Edward, I think you should tell your mother of your plans to ask Bella...she has something put away for you. Well for when this day arrived."

He smiled and hugged me tightly. I returned the gesture and then we parted our ways.

While I drove away, my phone rang. I answered without looking to see who it was and heard Bella's soft voice on the other end. She sounded like she was crying.

"Edward, will you come to my place when your shift ends? We need to talk."

My heart felt like it was going to crack from the pain in her voice.

"Baby...what's wrong? Are you okay? Did something happen? Are you hurt?"

I was asking questions as they popped into my head. I didn't know what to think of this call and I was scared I had done something to hurt her, again.

"Nothing happened love, is just that...well I-um...It can wait until your off...just...please come as soon as you get off okay?"

I sat there feeling my stomach twist in knots and knew there was no way I would make it eighteen hours until I found out.

"Bella...please baby, I wont be able to focus with this hanging over my head."

She took a deep breath and then said the words that changed my world.

"Im late".


	20. Chapter 20

**Songs for this chapter: Green Eyes - ColdPlay**

**I'd listen to the song and read along... its pretty nice that way.**

Thanks Tina for the great Beta job you do for _In My Place, _ I appreciate you taking the time to make this story happen. Everyone enjoy the update.

* * *

**BPOV (Green Eyes)**

Edward was gone by the time I had gotten back home from my interview. I was sad that I had not been able to see him before he had to go in for another eighteen hours, but I knew that it had to be that way.

I let myself pull out the house papers Edward had left me so that I could look them over once more. It did not surprise me that it had not gotten easier, but at least I was able to look at them without flinching at the prices. Money was a part of who Edward was, and he was in no way a snob or a show off about it. I would not have known had I not been to his families home and learned so much about the Cullen history at the mixer.

At the end of my daydream session, I still had not come up with an answer and was nowhere near finding one.

After I removed the house hunting papers from my line of sight, I got back to work and finished my stories in record time. I guess using work as a distraction was a great way to beat a deadline.

I sent my stories in and started in on some of the upcoming pieces that had been assigned to me. I was trying to keep my mind focused on the things in front of me, but my mind had begun to wonder off. I was still worried about what to tell Edward about us possibly living together.

I stopped trying to concentrate and called it a day. It was only two' o clock, but at least my work was done and sent in for final edit.

I was still stressing over the cost of the houses and more importantly the answer I needed to come up with for Edward about our living situation when I decided to get in the shower. It was all I could think of to calm my nerves.

It was when I was stripping down and searching for the patch sitting on my hip that the world began to shift. I could actually feel my body begin to tighten from fear.

When I didn't feel it, I started counting down days in my head. I was doing the math over and over again, but all I could think of is that I was almost a week late. I hadn't put one on after I had removed the last one...my mind was occupied with thoughts of Edward and why he was so upset in my room that night he had come and found me and Paul together.

I couldn't breath. I sat down on the edge of the tub in a blank state for a long time until I realized I needed to move. I made my way back to my bed and let the reality of what I had done sink in. I was scared now. Shock had left and now I was just down right scared.

What would I do if I were pregnant? I wasn't exactly without means to care for a child, and I had more than enough space here...

I was still lost in that thought when a completely new round of them assaulted me. I thought of Edward...I saw green eyes and copper hair on a tiny little baby with ten toes and ten fingers. I felt my body relax at the thought and suddenly I was smiling.

Maybe this wasn't so bad...sure the timing was off, but it is not as if I didn't want him...hadn't we just been talking about this days before? He had said that he would be elated if I was pregnant, and I believed him.

Suddenly, my emotions were all over the place. I didn't know which ones to lead with, so I just let the tears win. They were both happy and scared, so it all worked with that logic.

I did not have a knot in my stomach anymore, but my nerves were still on edge. I did not want to deal with this alone, but I was not sure if saying anything to Edward was wise at this point... I had decided to keep it quiet for the time being, but when I went to my dresser to grab clothes, the diamonds in my ring caught sunlight...and the shine caught my eye.

I realized that it was not an option anymore. Edward had given me this ring as a symbol of what we were both working for, and what it involved was both of us being open and honest. There was no way I could keep this from him after all the grief I had just given him over the last few days.

Therefore, before I could talk myself out of it, I grabbed my cell and dialed his number. It rang twice and then he picked up.

"Hello?" He sounded like he had not known it was me. My heart hurt a little by that but I pulled together what strength I had left and began.

"Edward, will you come to my place when your shift ends? We need to talk." I was trying my best to sound normal, but even I could hear the strain in my voice.

"Baby...what's wrong? Are you okay? Did something happen? Are you hurt?" He sounded like he was going to jump out of his skin. I didn't want him having to carry this around for eighteen hours so I tried to calm him without spilling the beans.

"Nothing happened love; it's just that...well I-um...It can wait until you're off...just...please come as soon as you get off okay?"

Whatever I would be facing, I knew I just needed him with me. I felt the tears running down my face again and this time I didn't know if they were happy or scared.

"Bella...please baby, I won't be able to focus with this hanging over my head."

He was right, I had made it sound as urgent as it was, and if I were he, I would not be able to focus either. He needed to be able to focus especially while in surgery. With that last thought, I pulled what was left of my courage and said what I hoped he would understand.

"I'm late".

It was complete silence for a few moments and then he broke the quiet.

"You mean late, late?" He sounded like he was confused so I said all I could to help him understand me.

"Yes Edward, almost a week now..." I said it as gently as I could so he would not freak out. I was scared and if he were to go off the deep end, I did not think I could handle it.

He was silent again and then breathed out, "Bella..." it was so low, I thought I had imagined it but then he continued.

"Baby, this is good news...to me anyway... Please don't cry, love." He sounded so sweet and I started crying harder from his reaction, because now that he was okay, I could focus on what I really felt.

"Really?" I just needed his reassurance again.

"God baby, yes...I love you. Do you remember when I told you the other afternoon that I would be elated if you were? I meant it love...I meant everything."

I let out a relieved laugh as we both let the reality of what may be settle over us.

Soon Edward was at the hospital for his shift, and he needed to go. I had to talk him into working and not just calling in a favor. He had missed enough work on my account and I did not want him to miss anymore. When I had him, convinced he prepared to hang up.

"Baby, will you do me a favor?" I smiled at the tone he used. It was sweet and caring like I was his most prized possession. I gave him a yes and he continued.

"Rest. Please just lay down watch some TV and rest. Do you want me to order you some take out so you don't have to cook?" He sounded so hopeful at his idea. I chuckled and told him no and that I would be making a light dinner and then heading to bed early.

He released a deep breath that sounded relieved and told me he would be here as soon as he could get away.

When we hung up, my face had a smile. I laid back on my bed and thought of a little baby boy with copper hair and green eyes as I fell into a deep sleep.

______________________________________________________________________________

EPOV

After I hung up with Bella, I went into the hospital. I could not tell you how I got in or what was going on around me, because I was only there in body. My mind was currently over loaded with Bella and thoughts of a little brown haired baby girl that she may be carrying at this very moment.

I wanted to leave and go to her, I wanted to make love to her and tell her how much I loved her. The need for release of this all-consuming love was eating me up whole as the seconds passed by. All I could see in my head was Bella resting with a full belly and me pampering her every second I was with her.

I was at the nurse's station getting some paper work when I felt a hand on my arm. I turned to see my Chief Resident looking at me with the weirdest expression.

"Cullen, what's going on with you?" He was waiting for me to answer, but I didn't know what to tell him.

"Uh, well...nothings _wrong_ per say, but something is defiantly clouding my mind today"

He looked at me with question on his face and then started laughing at me. I was starting to get irritated by the particular reaction I was getting from people, so I couldn't help but furrow my brow.

"Go home...get some rest or whatever it is you're pre occupied with."

I wanted to argue and say no, but I could not find the words. All I wanted was to get to my Bella and hold her. He saw the torn expression on my face then helped me accept the offer...

"Edward, you have worked countless hours, more so than the rest in the program. I have seen you cover shift after shift and only now are you in need of some time for you. Go...take it and make right whatever it is that is holding that silly grin to your face."

I smiled bigger and thanked him as I walked faster down the hall and out to my car.

I was glad that I had thought to pack a bag before I left. This way I did not have to waste time getting to Bella. On my way to her place, I grabbed some lunch from Portofinos and a bundle of gerbera daisies. I wanted her to know how happy I was and that this was indeed joyous news to me.

When I reached her door, I couldn't help but chuckle at the memory of me in this exact predicament weeks before. I was at her door in scrubs holding daises. Except this time I was coming to see the mother of my baby...well at least I hoped.

I knocked and waited for her to answer, but she had not come to the door yet. Naturally, I started thinking of every horrible situation she could have found her way into behind that door. I started knocking a little louder because my nerves were getting the best of me. I felt my chest tighten and my heart rate pick up. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and dialed her number.

It rang three times and then she finally picked up. "Hello?" She sounded so tired as if I had woken her and I instantly felt bad.

"Baby, I'm so sorry...did I wake you?" she yawned and I heard her giggle a little.

"Yes, but its okay, I was dreaming of you and this is better."

I smiled into the phone and relaxed again.

"Love, can you open the door? I'm out in the hall." I heard her intake a breath and then sheets rustling in the background.

"Oh gosh, were you out there long, Edward? I'm so sorry; I must have been so out of it."

"Its okay baby...don't worry I just got here."

I heard her footsteps echoing closer to the door and I felt every nerve in my body like a live wire. When the door opened, I was greeted with the most beautiful sight my eyes would ever see.

Bella was in my shirt and her hair still looked good from her interview. She looked like a veritable goddess. I pulled her into my arms and kissed her deeply before shutting the door and picking her up. I carried her back to bed and placed her under the covers in the center.

She was smiling up at me with love and excitement. I could not get my scrubs off fast enough, but somehow I had managed to do it. When I was completely bare to her, I got under the covers and pulled her to me. I kissed every part of her face that was within reach of my lips and ran my fingers through her hair...

I felt her body relax into mine and she exhaled a deep breath with contentment. I held her that way for a long while before breaking the silence.

"How are you feeling, love?" She snuggled closer to me and spoke into my chest.

"Better now that you're with me..." I caressed her back and started at the beginning.

"How do you feel about everything love? Are you sad? I don't want you to be sad, but if you're not happy I understand that too..."

I wanted to support her emotions no matter what; I just hoped that somehow I could get her to a place that was at least near my joy.

"Actually...I'm pretty content right now. I think I was in shock earlier and then scared, but now...I am okay. I think that either way I will be just fine. I was mostly worried about what you would think..."

I pulled her chin up to look in my eyes. "Bella, I'm so happy...just...so happy love." I kissed her forehead and then her eyes before she could lay her head back down to rest.

I felt her nod against my chest before she spoke. "I don't want you to ever think I tried to trap you Edward...I can only imagine how this must look to you right now. You gave me this ring not even a week ago and now I tell you I could possibly be pregnant."

When she said the words, my heart was filled with happiness again. I hugged her tighter to my body and breathed in her scent.

"Baby...I could never think anything so low of you, I know who you are and most importantly what's in your heart...you just don't know how happy you've made me with this possibility."

I turned so that I was over her body now and leaned down to kiss her slowly. I wanted to savor this memory. I felt her hands come up to my neck and caress up the length of it into my hair. I deepened the kiss when she did that. Her touch was sending me over the edge of ecstasy and I wanted nothing more than to share it with her.

I felt her open her legs wider to accommodate me and I took my place rightfully between them before I rocked into her slowly. I was gentle and delicate with her. I knew enough about the early stages of pregnancy, but I did not want to chance it. Besides in making love to her this way I was able to fully appreciate every touch and kiss she gave me.

It wasn't rushed or wild, and we didn't even have to say anything to each other about what we were feeling. The emotions in the room were so thick that I could literally feel them all around us. I opened my eyes to see Bella and found her smiling with tears coming from her eyes. I knew they were tears of happiness and contentment so I didn't even worry. I simply kissed each one and took them into me.

All too soon, we both began to fall over the edge, and when I did not think I could take a second more, Bella whispered into my ear that she was already there. I kissed her with everything I had and followed her right over.

When we had come apart, I made my way down the length of her body and kissed her stomach. I laid my head right there beside her torso and held her to me and I fell asleep with her gently scratching my scalp as I rubbed soothing circles around her flat stomach.


	21. Chapter 21

**Songs for this chapter : Bubbly- Colbie Colliat**

**Yellow- ColdPlay**

You all need to thank Tina (rangernstephfan) My Beta, for this chapter. I was torn and almost went another way but she gave me some great ideas and basically this chapter was born right after! Thanks for reading.

* * *

**BPOV (Bubbly)**

I woke up around eight in the evening. I was completely relaxed and I had felt so rested. I tried to turn my body but I was being pulled back in the opposite direction by a set of strong arms securely around my middle. It hurt a little and I barely made a noise indicating it did.

"Ouch..." I whispered. I felt Edward pull away from my body and then sit up in a panic.

"Oh god, Bella...are you okay? Did I hurt you?" He looked like he was about to lose it and his face now contorted into pain. I was shocked to say the least. His expression just became more pained with every second that passed and mine in return was getting more amused.

"Edward...i'm fine. Stop it." He closed his eyes and shook his head slowly from side to side then pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Im sorry, Bella. I just dont want anything to happen to you...I would never forgive myself if I hurt you or the ba...well you know."

He looked embarassed now and I thought there was no better sight than the man in front of me overheating his cheeks with blush. I smiled wide and moved over him for a kiss.

"You need to take it easy, Edward. We dont even know for sure if I am..." I was kissing his face as I said it. He seemed to relax and then his arms were around me again as I melted into his chest for a long while.

"We should find out...dont you think?" He sounded so hopeful and nervouse at the same time. His excitement and anxiousness was begining to rub off on me, because I honestly wanted nothing more than to get some clothes on and run to the store for a test.

He must have seen it in my face when he looked down at me, because the next thing I knew he was jumping out of bed and throwing his scrubs back on with fervor. I started laughing as I watched him run around looking like a cartoon character.

When he looked up at me and saw me laughing he jumped back on the bed and gently pulled me into a kiss. It was innocent but it took my breath away all the same. He pulled back and held my face in his hands.

"I've never seen a smile that could light a room like yours...your simply radiant." He never looked away from me and I could see his words shining through like a light in his eyes. He meant it...he meant it all. This baby, if there was one...would be wanted and loved already. I saw it all clearly now, he really wanted all these things and he wanted them with me.

I kissed him back just like he had me, and spoke of my love to the only man who had ever touched my heart.

"Are you going to get what I think you are?" I smiled gently to him with a bit of excitement. He just nodded to me while wearing the biggest smile I had ever seen him wear.

"Okay...will you grab me something to eat while your out? " He looked back excited and started laughing.

"Defineatly Bella...I actually brought food from _portofinos, _but I think its bad now that I didnt put it away when I got here...I was a bit preoccupied."

"Come here..." I whispered to him. I wanted another kiss from him before he would be away again.

He leaned down and kissed me softly before pulling away and exiting the room.

__________________________________________________________________________________

I layed back down on the bed and just stared out at the city lights that were drifting in the room. I was calm and relaxed as I thought of the very real possibility of having a baby inside me right now.

I didnt have the scared or nervouse feelings that had invaded me earlier that day, and I knew it was because I now knew that Edward was happy.

When we made love earlier that night the realization that we were still unprotected and unsure of our pregnancy came to flood my mind. But just as quick as it came, it left. I had smiled and let the tears of peace take me over because I realized then that I didnt care...I wanted it too.

I stretched for a moment and made my way into the shower to get cleaned up. As I stepped into the bathroom and faced the mirror, I turned my body to the side and began imagining what it would be like to have the round belly that would accompany me for at least six months.

I made my way into the shower and let my body relax agains the hot water. I was still surprised at how calm and relxed I felt about everything as I washed my hair and the rest of my body. When I had fully lost myself in the thoughts of a little baby, I heard the door to the bathroom open.

Edward was peeking his head through the glass door now and grinning.

"What's got you all excited?" I played along. Edward rolled his eyes dramatically and scoffed playfully at me.

"Come on, Bella...you know what." I blew him a kiss and flicked water at his face before he shut the glass again.

"Just leave it on the counter...I'll do it when I get out okay?" I heard him sigh and then listened as he placed it on the sink area.

"Are you done yet, baby? The suspense is killing me." I inwardly laughed and rolled my eyes. I shut the water and reached for a towel. I felt Edwards hand over my own when I reached the hook.

"Let me, love." He kissed my hand and took the towel from the hook. I stood still as he wrapped me up and pulled me to his body. I was choked up by the amount of care he was bestowing upon me and I could feel the tears begin to sting my eyes. Suddenly my worries revolved around how he would feel if it werent positive.

"Edward...can we talk first?" He kissed my nose and nodded his head. Before I could move he lifted me up and walked me to the bed.

When we were both laying down, I rolled into his side and began.

"If this is real...then what?" I kept my face in his chest and let his scent saturate my senses while he held me and I awaited his answer.

I could feel him kissing my head over and over again before he spoke.

"Well...I would like very much to buy a home sooner rather than later. My hope would be that the two of us could get comfortable and settled before you get too far along so that way when the baby gets here...we"ll _all_ feel at home." He paused for a moment before asking, "What do you want Bella?"

That was a good question. Edward had just painted a wonderful picture in my head, but the only thing missing was that he hadnt mentioned marriage. Dont get me wrong, I didnt want to be one of those people who felt they had to get married once pregnant, but he hadnt even mentioned the option later in the years.

I was still a bit self conscious and I did not really want to have to be the one to come out and say it, but there really was not much time to waste at this point. Our relationship had developed instantly and grew at an even faster rate.

I took in a deep breath and put the words out there.

"What about marriage?"

I said it low. I'm not sure if I said it for him to hear, but all the same it was said and there would not be any going back now.

Before I could regret the words Edward had flipped over to his side and was propped up on his elbow facing me. His face was excited and he looked almost giddy.

"Of course baby...god yes! I know you may not believe this, but I actually talked to my dad today before you called me with the news. I was just coming back from lunch with him when you called. Anyway, I asked him there to get his opinion on me asking you that very question..."

My face was frozen in a state of shock. I couldnt believe the words I had just heard. Edward had already wanted to marry me before any of this happened? I felt my eyes filling with tears and when his face went blurry from my vision, I felt his lips on my ear.

"I was just waiting to find out where your father lived so that I could get his blessing. I have every intention of making you mine, Bella. I really cant wait."

I pulled together what I could of my composure and clutched him to me.

"I didnt mean that I expected you to, but...really? You want me?"

He pulled me back and looked me square in the eyes with chin in his hand. "Your all I have ever wanted, Bella. Your all that matters, love."

He kissed me slowly and then pulled back and looked at me again with an almost apologetic expression.

"I didnt mean that..." I felt my heart tighten and I gasped from the shock of it. I didnt think there was worse pain than the one consuming my heart at the very moment.

"No No No...I mean...I just mean that..you and the baby...you _both_ are all that matters."

He peppered me with kisses and held me close as he rubbed the length of my back. I instantly felt better about it and relaxed into the embrace. Soon though, it was time to get the show on the road.

I whispered into his neck as we were still joined, "Well, we dont even know if there is a baby yet...I guess I should find out huh?".

After he processed my words I received one last lingering kiss and he walked me to the door.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­_____________________________________________________________________________

**EPOV**

I stood at the door just waiting for Bella to emerge. I was trying to find things to distract me from what was happening at this very moment. I walked to the window and looked out over the city lights.

I tried to take their beauty in, but all I could see was the vision of Bella holding our precious baby. I saw sleepless nights and tired days ahead, and I smiled. I smiled because in each vision I got to be with Bella and our baby everyday. God, just the thought of _our _baby was enough to send me soaring. I wanted it...I wanted it so bad.

My mind was racing a mile a minute and in those laps I had thought of everything from the best physicans to houses and the roomiest luxary vehicles. It was all for Bella. She would need the best care and I would see to it that she received it...that they both did. I envisioned our home and the fact that I hadnt seen one to my dreams standards led me to the avenue of having it designed and then built. My mother would be of great assistance in that department. Then the car, Bella would need plenty of room and something attractive and safe. I was still tossing the Volvo Toureg and a Mercedes ML320 when I heard the door to the bathroom open.

I turned quickly to find Bella leaning against the wall watching me. I walked to her and kissed her gently before pulling back.

"Five minutes..." I nodded at her words and took a deep breath.

"Either way love...this _will_ happen for us." I kissed her head and hugged her to me. Bella just laughed lightly and kissed my chest before saying,"Well if we continue on the way we did this afternoon, it will be sooner rather than later."

I looked down at her and the realization dawned on me that we hadnt used protection. Bella was not protected any more either and that meant that even if this test didnt turn out positive, then there was still a possibility that we could be having a baby.

I started laughing and hugged her tighter. I was trying to be mindful of the fact that she may be pregnant, so I contained it to her arms and back. She giggled and pulled me to the window by my hands. When we were directly in front of the view, I wrapped my arms around her and rested them on her belly while we both stared out the window in silence.

My mind was still racing with what I would need to get done for us before the baby arrived, and it didnt take me long to find out where Bella's silence had taken her.

"I want us to live together, Edward...no matter what the results say." She clasped her hands with mine and I smiled over her shoulder to me. I just returned her gaze with a matching one on my face and whispered, "Me too, Bella."

I kissed her head and continued to stare out the window. Not many minutes later, Bella turned in my arms and her face held a look of shame. It caught me off guard and my heart tightened from the look of pain she held.

"I _want _this Edward, but I cant afford any of those houses that you picked out...even with us splitting the mortgage." She dropped her head a little and was biting her lip. I knew it took a lot for her to say that to me, and I hated the way it obviously made her feel.

She had apparantly not understood that _I _ would be the provider. Maybe it was a bit of a cavemanish thought, but in my mind and world a man's greatest accomplishment was to give his wife her home. To ensure that she was happy and lived a good life. Bella would never want for anything again and I would make it my lifes goal to provide her anything her heart desired.

I saw my father do it for my mother...I had recently just become aware of Jasper doing it for Alice, and now I would do it for Bella.

I shook my head _no_ to her and then pulled her to the bed. I sat her down and knealed beneath her.

"Love, _I'm _having our home built. It's going to be my job to provide for you Bella...and it starts with a house." She looked up at me from beneath her lashes and confusion was on her face so I tried to make it more clear.

"Bella, I am going to marry you...you just dont know when I am going to ask...now, I obviously only figured on you saying yes."

I felt a little embarassed by my over confidence now, and the fact that I had just admitted to it was even worse.

Bella was shaking her head again and she set her gaze on the wood floor. " I cant let you do that Edward." her voice was breaking and she wouldnt meet my eyes as she continued.

"I know you are used to the nicer things in life, and..well..I am not. I was raised on a Kindergarten teachers salary, and my dad isnt getting any richer as the chief of police in his small town. I'm not about to let you foot the bill for me. It wouldnt be right...I have nothing to offer you in return."

I was shocked by her words and stayed quiet. I had no idea how to come back from that.

"I make a good living and I can honestly say I live comfortably. I worked hard to earn all that you see around us, but I honestly cannot see me working hard enough in the near future to earn what I would need to even put a down payment on a house like those you printed.

I stopped her then. This had gone on long enough.

"Bella, stop." She looked at me and I could see tears in her eyes as she bit on her bottom lip.

"_I _am the one who is going to be providing...it's what my role is...do you think I would ever want something like that if you werent in the picture? Hell Bella, It wouldnt even be a thought in my mind if I hadnt met you, baby."

I lifted her chin again because she kept dropping it.

"Bella, your giving me _you!_ No house, car or anyother materialistic thing could compare to the value in that...Your giving me _life_ from _you_! That my love is priceless."

It was right after I said that that we both turned to the bathroom door and then back to eachother. Five minutes had come and gone and we both knew it.

I stood and held bella to me for a long kiss and then led her through the door to see what our future had in store.

I let Bella lead and then slowly made my way behind her as she grabbed the little white stick. When I leaned over her shoulder I grabbed on to her hips and held my breath. She held it up and I exhaled as I saw two little pink lines form a plus.


	22. Chapter 22

**_BPOV (Touch, Feel & Love)_**

There it was...the little pink plus sign. I felt myself shaking slightly and I'm almost certain I would have fallen to the floor, but Edward was still behind me and he was holding me securely.

I couldn't form words, I had tried to but none were coming out. I let out a huff of air from my lungs I hadn't been aware I was holding. I turned my body and faced Edward.

When I looked at him my heart stopped. He was smiling so wide and his eyes were spilling tears faster than they could make them. He gently held my face and kissed me tenderly for a long while.

I was still incapable of speech when he slowly pulled away from our kiss, but at this moment it was Edward who wanted to speak.

"Bella..." His voice was cracking and his lips were shaking lightly. He knelt down in front of me and kissed our baby that was growing inside me. He held his hands in place on either side, looked up into my eyes and began.

"From the first moment I saw you...you had my heart. Bella, I have never been so happy in my entire life. I promise you that I will always be here for you and with you as our baby comes into this world...Our baby...god Bella please tell me this is all real. I need you more than you could ever know...both of you."

He kissed and rubbed my stomach as he waited for my confirmation. I could feel my cheeks becoming cold from the tears that were streaking my face. They were happy tears and I didn't think they would ever stop. My happiness was at an all time high and even with the release the cry had given me; I was still completely consumed with love.

I smiled to him and found the words he needed to hear. "Yes...this is real. We're having a baby, Edward...you and me...together."

I ran my fingers through his hair and then knelt down in front of him. I could still feel the tears making trails on my cheeks but I didn't care. Edward was still rubbing my stomach as he leaned in to kiss me slowly again. I felt so much emotion running through his lips to my own that I had to hold onto him harder as an attempt to keep myself grounded.

I don't know how long we both sat there together on the floor without words, but eventually I saw that Edward was moving to stand and was lightly trying to get me to join him.

As we walked to the bed, I looked to the clock and saw that it was 9:45 pm. almost two hours had passed since we spoke of our possibility and now it was a reality. I giggled at the saying of anything can change in a minute.

I went to get some pajama bottoms on so I could go to the kitchen and find some food but Edward stopped me with his hands on my hips. I chuckled and tried to get free, "Umm sweetie, I'm hungry and I'm trying to get dressed so I can make something real quick...can you let me go?"

His lips were at my ear and I could feel him shaking his head no to me. "I ordered us some food before I came back love...it should be here in a couple minutes." He kissed my neck and held on to me as we slowly swayed side to side.

"You did? Thank you...what did you order?"

He continued to drop kisses on my neck and shoulder while he answered.

"Thai...I got a bunch of different things as well as the shrimp pad Thai you like...is that okay? He pulled back weary and waited for my response. I just smiled and nodded, because I was truly hungry and it wouldn't have mattered to me what he got.

He kissed my head and let me get dressed. We made our way out into the kitchen to grab some plates and silverware before the delivery arrived. Edward ran back to the room and changed into his shorts and t shirt instead of staying in his scrubs.

When he had just arrived by my side, there was a knock at the door. I sent Edward to answer while I grabbed drinks. As soon as I heard the delivery man say the total I ran into the living room to grab my purse. I was horrified that Edward may have thought I sent him to the door expecting him to pay, so I ran with speed I didn't think I had. Just when I turned the corner and saw my purse, I tripped and went flying to the floor. I braced myself for the impact and tightened up.

Instead of the floor, I felt Edwards body cradling me carefully to his side. I opened my eyes and was met with a horrified Edward. Instantly, I thought of the baby. This was going to be hard to remember that if I fell it wouldn't be just me in danger of being hurt; it would be him or her as well. I felt like a failure already and it was clearly written all over my face.

Edward handed the man a large bill and said no change quickly before shutting the door and setting the food down. He picked me up and sat me on the couch.

"Bella you cant be doing that....you could have fallen and hurt you're self and the baby. Please love, don't do that ever again." I saw the stunned and scared look he gave me. I wanted to just lay back and die from the shame.

"I-I'm so sorry, Edward. I didn't think...Oh god, I could have hurt the baby...I could have lost it because I was foolish." I was sobbing now and I dropped my head to his chest.

"No baby, no...it was an accident...but you need to be more careful from now on. You need to always be aware of your surroundings and what you eat and drink." He was patting my back tenderly, but I stiffened when he said that last part.

He stiffened too and pulled my face to meet his eyes. "What is it Bella?" He looked so scared and worried, but I could actually feel my nerves tightening with the seconds.

"I-oh god Edward, I've been drinking...not to excess, but it was alcohol all the same. The baby, what if I hurt the baby?" I could feel my chest tight from the oxygen I was harboring inside. My anxiety was high and fear had gripped my body.

Edward just shook his head before he answered, "Bella, you should be okay...but were going to get you set up with a doctor tomorrow for a check up. You need to start vitamins and we need to find out how far along you are." He kissed my head and wiped my tears before standing.

I watched Edward leave the room and emerge with his cell and my laptop. He sat down next to me and hit numbers into the cell and waited for an answer.

When he got one, he was in physician mode. He asked for the listings of three different doctors and proceeded to leave messages with the answering services. He finally turned to me and began.

"Love, I got the three best doctors in the city who will be calling us back tomorrow. I'm sure we can get into any one of them, so don't worry. "He opened up my laptop and then three different browser windows, each holding doctor's information. He turned it to me and set it on my lap.

"Pick the one you would feel most comfortable with and then tell me who and I'll take care of it for you. I'll make the arrangements so that you can go in as soon as possible." He kissed me and then laid his head back.

I felt my heart drop at the sight of him. His excitement seemed to be gone now and he just looked stressed. Fear gripped me at the thought of him not really being happy about the baby and I started to cry silently.

I looked down at the screen and read through blurry eyes about the doctors and their experience. I couldn't focus though, Edward was obviously upset now and it had affected me greatly.

When I clicked over to the next doctor, I heard Edwards voice.

"Baby, what's wrong?" He sounded panicked and was kneeling in front of me trying to catch my tears with his fingers. I moved the laptop and dropped my head into my hands as the tears washed over me.

"Love...baby, please talk to me." Edwards's voice was pained and frustrated, and his tone just drove me harder into the tears.

I took a breath and apologized.

"I'm sorry Edward...please, just please don't be angry with me."

I met his eyes for the briefest second and they were confused.

"About what, love? Why would I be angry with you?" Confusion was gone now and replaced with fear. I heard it in his tone.

"You seem so frustrated now...and angry. I didn't do this on purpose, please don't be mad. I don't think I can take this all on by myself." I broke down again.

Edward pulled me to him and held on as he kissed my face repeatedly.

"Oh god love, no! I'm not upset with you or about the baby...I'm frustrated with my schedule at work...I was just thinking of how difficult it was going to be to get the time off that I would need for appointments and house planning. I just wish this damn residency was over so I could be with you for all of it love...you'll never be alone in this love. I promise you."

His words gave me reassurance and I took a few moments to calm my nerves before pulling away. When I did, Edward peppered my face with love and then looked into my eyes once more

"Bella...I am beyond thrilled about this baby, don't ever think anything different, ever."

I nodded my head and stood to get the food. Once again though, Edward beat me to it. I rolled my eyes and laughed at his expression. He stuck his tongue out at me and held the food to his chest.

"You wouldn't deny your baby food would you, Edward?" I gave him the saddest expression I could muster up and gave him the pouty lip while rubbing my non existent belly.

Edwards's eyes went wide for a moment and then he tightened them playfully before handing me the entire bag. "You don't fight fair, love." I laughed freely now and pecked his lips as I walked past him into the kitchen.

We sat at the island feasting on our very late dinner and talking about the baby. After many, many noodles and shrimp I was full and happy. Edward continued to pour food onto my plate without asking. I hadn't noticed at first because we were talking about our house and what we wanted it to have. I was lost in details of nurseries and yards as I continued to bite on food that was in front of me, but paused when I saw Edward grabbing a container and putting more on.

My mouth fell open and my eyes were wide. He just looked up to me and paused before saying, "What?" His voice was playful because he knew why I was looking at him like that.

"Edward, I'm pregnant not starving!" He just smiled and sat back with a grin before saying. "You're eating for two now..."

I rolled my eyes, but laughed. I was having such a good time with him as we celebrated our news together over dinner. It was just how it should be, and the longer we got to enjoy it by ourselves the more special it felt.

When I had eaten enough and could no longer look at the food, we got up and stored the left over and made our way back to bed.

Between the food and the crying my body instantly relaxed into a calm and peaceful state of sleep with Edward securely wrapped around me.

______________________________________________________________________________

EPOV

When I woke the next morning around five, it was to a soft Bella draped over my body. I felt like the richest man alive with her in my arms.

I just lay there for a few minutes reminding myself that she was mine...and that we were having a baby. I breathed in a calming breath and disengaged my body from beneath hers. It took all my will power not to wake her and make love to her.

Finally I pulled away and made my way into the shower to get ready for my shift. I knew I would be spending at least another thirty two hours away from her and it was killing me. I showered fast and went to get dressed, but when I walked back in the room, I was frozen where I stood.

She was sitting up in bed and still naked. I wanted to do many things, but all I could actually accomplish was staring. Her hair was wild and she looked so tired, but in my eyes she was gorgeous.

"Are you leaving already?" She whispered. I tried to move to her, but my legs were still heavy.

"Yes love, I have to make up for yesterday and then I still have a shift after, so I'm just going to work through it so I can take the same time off I have scheduled...we have a lot to get done and I'm going to need every spare minute I have to see to it that its done."

She grabbed the sheet and brought it up her body while dropping her gaze from me.

"I'm sorry...I hate that this is going to be a burden on you." She said it and she meant it.

I found my will power to walk and made my way to her as fast as my legs would carry me. I didn't want her to ever feel like she or our baby would be a burden to me. They were the exact opposite of that and I wanted her to understand.

"Bella, don't ever say that again. You and the baby are the only two things that matter to me now. I'm up right now and heading to that hospital for the both of you, everything I do now will be for you two...okay?"

She looked up at me and there was a small smile playing at her lips. She leaned over to me and laid her head against my shoulder.

"I love you, Edward." I could feel her warm breath against my chest when she said it. I could never feel differently for this woman before me, she would always be at the top of my list, and there in her arms was our baby sharing the spot.

I kissed her head and laid her back down. "Love, I want you to rest some more. When you get up, get dressed and give me a call. I want you to come down to the hospital so we can get you in to see Dr. Young, she doesn't have to stay your doctor, but at least she can get your care started before we find one more permanent."

She was smiling up at me as I told her that and when I was finished she brought our hands to her stomach.

"This is really happening isn't it?" Her voice sounded excited and nervous all at the same time. I nodded my head and dropped a kiss to her lips then made my way to her ear and whispered, "Yes love, and I'll be here every step of the way with you...we're in this together."

She kissed me for a long while and the need to claim her was growing by the second. I knew I needed to get going, but my need for her was stronger. It would always be stronger.

I didn't fight it anymore, so I lay over her and then flipped her so she was now in our position. We made love for the first time since learning of our baby and the dynamic had changed in a tangible way. She was no longer the woman I was trying to show my love for; she was the woman carrying our love inside her.

That reality was enough to send me over the edge almost as soon as we began, but I held on and bathed her body with love until it was too much for her to take. When we came together it was a euphoric feeling, and one I knew I would never tire of.

I knew I would be late, but I didn't care. I held her to me and played with her hair until she was peacefully asleep again. Once I was sure she wouldn't wake, I dressed and dragged myself from her side and off to my shift.

~****~

I was on cloud nine all morning long. I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face as I made rounds and sat through reviews from the chief resident. Everyone kept asking me what had me smiling, but I didn't want to tell them yet because Bella and I hadn't even told our families. My mother would never forgive me if she heard this news second hand.

I talked myself out of texting Bella four times before it was even noon . I was anxious to get her here and have her checked over to make sure they were both healthy. Around eleven thirty I got the call I had been waiting for.

"Bella?"

"Hi Edward. I'm up now and ready to come down there."

I exhaled a relieved breath and smiled into the phone. "Okay baby, just come down here and let me know when you get here...I love you Bella."

"I love you too. Where do I go when I park? Where will you be?"

She sounded nervous and I understood completely. She wasn't sure if I would be joining her and was more than likely feeling jitters about what would happen.

"Baby, park in the garage for obstetrics and then call me when you do. I'll meet you at the entrance and we'll go in together...I mean...only if you're fine with that."

I hadn't thought about her not wanting me around, and I felt my heart fall a little at the reality that she just may not.

"No, Edward. Please come in with me, baby...I want you there with me." I breathed a sigh of relief and promised her I would.

When we hung up I made my way up to the obstetrics floor and sought out Emily. When she saw me her eye brow raised and there was a humorous smile on her face.

"Um, Em...remember what I asked you for this morning? Well, she's on her way and I just wanted to make sure it was still okay if we stole some of your time...I'll pay you personally...whatever works best for you."

She laughed and squeezed my shoulder. "Its fine Cullen, just give me a ring when she arrives and we'll get her in as quickly as possible." She smirked and shook her head a bit before walking away.

When I arrived down stairs, I ran into the chief resident and let him know I would be away for my break earlier than planned. He gave me a curious look but dropped it. "Just keep your pager near in case you're needed for an emergency. Other wise...see you when you get back."

I knew I owed him...I was willing to give him my car at that moment as a trade for time, hell I wouldn't miss it. I didn't even want it anymore. I was about to head outside and wait for Bella's call when I felt the vibration in my pocket.

I grabbed my phone and hit talk. "Hello?" it was my mother.

"Edward just got your message. Your dad told me about your plans to sell, and about the house, so I assume you're in need of my expertise?"

I laughed a little and started. "Actually mom, I need a lot of it. I wanted to speak with you about helping design it and then with getting a good contractor...it's kind of a rush order."

She stayed quiet and then asked, "Honey, what's going on? There's no need to rush things like this, and you still haven't even put your place on the market yet..."

I didn't want to give her the news over the phone; this was something that was to be celebrated over an intimate setting with the entire family. I gave her enough to sate the curiosity but held tight to the secret.

"Well mom, it's a long and happy story and I'm sure you'll agree with me once you hear the whole thing, but you'll have to wait till Thursday night. So what do you say? Will you help me out?"

"Of course Edward...but why do I have to wait till Thursday? Just tell me now." I could hear the anxiousness and excitement in her voice, and I knew it would eat at her until then, but I wouldn't share this news without Bella beside me in her rightful place.

"Thursday evening mom...I'll call with the details...and, thank you." I heard her huff with resignation because she knew I wouldn't tell her yet. She graciously conceded and I laughed promising her it would be worth the wait. When I was hanging up I heard the beep come from the other line.

I saw Bella's name flash across the screen and I anxiously clicked over.

"Honey?"

"I'm here Edward...will you still meet me at the entrance?" She sounded scared and I hated that she felt that way.

"Yes baby, I'm on my way. Just wait for me if you beat me there. She said okay and I hung up as I made my way up the elevator.

When the doors opened up I practically sprinted to the doors where I could find Bella. Just as I had made my way outside, I saw her walking hesitantly toward me with her head down. I went to her and scooped her into my arms as I kissed her with longing.

When I sat her back on her feet she looked up to me and her face was free of worry. Her eyes were shining and her smile was wide. There was no more hesitancy in her face as she grabbed my hand and we made our way in together.

~***~

Bella was sitting up on the table in her paper gown while I caressed her arms and stroked her hair. She was leaning against my body as we waited anxiously for Dr. Young to appear. When the door opened my heart fell and my body stiffened.

It was Lauren. She had been part of my extensive past and was now apparently going to be Bella's nurse for this very private moment.

Lauren's face held a look of amusement as she looked from Bella to me repeatedly. I felt Bella squirm a little at that and it made my stomach churn even harder. I didn't want Lauren in here making my love feel anxious or upset.

I tightened my jaw as I returned my stare to Lauren in warning. If she did anything or said anything to Bella I would find a way to ruin her.

"Hello, just need to check some things over with you on your chart Isabella." Her tone seemed nice, but she said Bella's name pointedly.

"O-okay"

"You were on the Ortho's patch just until recently is that correct?"

I felt Bella tighten and then answer very low.

"Um yes... I was"

"Did you go off of it with the intent of this pregnancy or was this unplanned?" I squared my body now in a defensive position over Bella. I knew these were valid questions, but Lauren was asking them with a tone and manner that suggested Bella had been trying to do this on purpose.

I heard Bella mumble a "no" and kept her head down. There was no way I would allow anyone to make her feel less than excited about our baby, so I spoke into Bella's ear low, but loud enough for Lauren to hear.

"Honestly Bella...how are you not sure I didn't rip it off you to make sure this happened?"

I kissed her cheek and ran my nose along her jaw. I saw her biting her lip and then smiling a little. She turned to me and brought her hand to my cheek and kissed me innocently on the nose.

I heard Lauren exhale and when we both turned to her we saw her jaw hanging open. I smirked and held Bella closer to my chest.

Lauren closed her mouth quickly and tried to put on a friendly professional face as she asked her next few questions, but she didn't fool me, her face may as well been jade...and rightfully so.

Bella was the only woman I had ever shown love for, ever. Anything I had done with anyone else had been for my own personal satisfaction and they knew it. No words of love or promises were ever departed from my lips, and I had never attempted to lead anyone into those thoughts.

Lauren left the room and I felt Bella turn in my arms to look at my face.

"I won't ask anything I don't want to know, so please don't tell me."

I'm sure my mouth was hanging open like a fool, but Bella didn't say anything else about it. She just turned and held my hand as we waited for Dr. Young.

Almost immediately after I regained composure, Emily walked in.

"Ah, good afternoon Isabella"

"Bella" we both said at the same time.

Emily just laughed and nodded quickly in understanding.

"Okay, so I hear we're having a baby. Congratulations Bella...you too Edward."

I smiled wide and so did Bella. I kissed her head and rubbed her back.

"Okay, so let's figure out how far along you are. When was the date of your last menstrual cycle?"

Bella didn't hesitate to answer. "The twenty second of July." I was mentally calculating the time in my head and then was interrupted by the next question.

"How long in between your cycles Bella?" Again she didn't hesitate to give her response.

"They're thirty one days long," I saw Emily smile to her in approval of her knowledge.

"Looks like you conceived the baby on the eighth and your due date is the first of May 2010 . Your baby is two weeks old."

I felt my heart ready to burst with love. I looked down to Bella and saw she was smiling brightly. Our baby was now two weeks old, and I was getting more anxious by the second.

Bella asked a lot of questions and I chimed in with a few here and there. But Bella had complete control of this. We were both assured that the wine she had drank early on would not be affecting the baby, but that she needed to stay away from all things like that moving forward.

I had made so many mental notes that I was berating myself for not bringing a tape recorder. It was too soon to actually see the baby right now, we wouldnt of heard a heart beat either, but Emily wanted to be sure of Bella's timeline and we completed a sonogram anyway.

Even though the picture was small, I hooked onto that screen as if it were oxygen. There was a very tiny being there for our eyes to see, and my heart swelled with love.

I had never been in more awe in my life. It was the proudest moment I had ever experienced. We had made that and it was a symbol of our love. Best of all, Bella was carrying it inside her lovely body.

I kissed her head repeatedly as Emily took pictures of the ultrasound and printed them out for us.

"Edward..." I stopped and gave her my full attention.

"I agree that we need to find our house _sooner..._ than later. I want him to be at home when he gets here."

I raised my eye brows in amusement. "Him?"

Bella had a shy smile on her face as she dropped her stare to the ground playfully

"I guess he_ or _she will need to be at home when were released." She looked up and I smiled fully at her. I didn't really care if it was a boy or girl, as long as the baby was healthy.

"I agree baby...I was serious when I said we would get one built to our needs. I've already spoken with my mother about designing it...we'll just need to hire a contractor and find the land."

I brought my lips to hers and kissed her slowly while bringing my hands to where our baby rest and gave gentle strokes of love.

She didn't argue or throw a fit. She simply nodded and stared at where my hands were resting.

When she looked back up to me she whispered a soft, "Okay" nodded her head and turned to start walking again. I felt relieved that I didn't have to fight her on this, and it gave me hope that she wouldn't argue over the car either.

When we turned the corner, I grabbed the ultra sound pictures and gently draped my free arm over Bella's shoulder. My head rested on hers as we both admired our tiny creation. I was pulled from my daze when I heard a very familiar voice behind me. I stopped and turned to see my father grinning at me and Bella then down at our ultrasound.


	23. Chapter 23

Thanks Tina for being an amazing Beta!

has been a little wierd for me...I posted chap.22 two days ago, but no one got an alert...I reposted today, and hopefully you all get this chapter on time with an alert ;)

Enjoy!

* * *

**BPOV (Sweetest Thing)**

A lot of things changed during that initial visit to Dr. Young. I had always thought myself an adult and a serious person, however the feelings that washed over me at the moment I saw the tiny seed of a baby on the monitor made me feel like I hadn't yet known the definition of adult.

Everything just seemed to be much clearer. Initially, I had been nervous to go in. I didn't know the first thing about babies. I was an only child and I had never even babysat growing up, but when she confirmed my due date and then the date we had made our baby, my instincts took over and I quickly sputtered out question after question.

I could feel Edward next to me, supporting me with his caresses and dropping kisses to my hair. He would ask a question every now and then, but for the most part I was the one leading us in this appointment.

I realized in there that we could and would be able to make this work. Edward had made more sense to me now...he said his role was provider and I now saw what he meant.

I would be the one to carry this life in me for nine months, and his desire and need to be involved was the direction in which he said that...it was all he could do while we shared this joy together. I had an 'aha' moment and made a silent promise to myself. It was that I would give him the freedom for what he felt he needed to do...even if it was internally killing me.

Dozens of thoughts went through my mind in that room, and most of them were circling around, what comes next? I didn't really know, and I was just fine with that, because in my head I saw a beautiful little baby boy with copper colored hair and green eyes. He was gorgeous, he was Edward...

I saw us laying in bed together and admiring his beautiful face. I saw our room decorated with warm tones and cherry wood floors, we had a cream colored comforter and there was a balcony off to the right that opened up with French doors.

My vision was so powerful and I wanted it so badly. When we made our way out into the hall and off toward the exit I found my courage to let Edward know.

"Edward..." I stopped and held on to his hand. He turned to me and I could feel his gaze upon me as he waited for me to continue.

"I agree that we need to find our house sooner...rather than later... I want him to be at home when he gets here."

Edward just smiled and gave me a knowing look before teasing me about my slip of imagining a son. I didn't care though…I was just happy that he looked over the fact I had asked him to get started on our home.

We had a lot that needed to be done, I needed to sell my place and so did Edward. We needed to find land and meet with his mother to help guide her in our wishes. I was still reeling over those thoughts as Edward wrapped me closer and kissed my head. He was admiring our baby's sonogram when I heard Carlisle's voice behind us.

I felt Edward stiffen a little and I immediately followed suite. I didn't know if this was something that would upset Carlisle and Esme. I knew that they liked me as a person, but would they still feel the same while I was carrying Edward's baby?

Before I could dwell on that, Edward turned and faced his father. My nerves calmed considerably when I saw the smile on Carlisle's lips. He was beaming at Edward and I then dropped his gaze to our sonogram.

I turned to get a read on Edwards face and see if we needed to do damage control, but when I saw his smiling face and shining eyes I knew that this would be okay.

Carlisle was the first to break the silence.

"I'm going to leave you two, right here and not ask any questions…" His tone was playful and his smile was still in place.

I started to object, I didn't want him to feel like he had to keep a distance or that we didn't want to share it with him.

Carlisle was shaking his head as I began and he came to my side, and placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Please Bella…I really must beg you both not to say anything to me. You see, Esme would be very upset if I heard anything big without her present or even before her. So I need to excuse myself and escape."

He kissed my forehead and smiled again to Edward and me once more. Before he turned to leave though, Carlisle put a hand on Edwards shoulder.

"Son…we'll see you Thursday?" His voice was warm and his eye's reflected his tone. I saw Edward having some kind of emotional conversation with his father. He nodded and smiled brightly before Carlisle prepared to leave.

"Bella…till then." He leaned over and kissed my head as he walked back in the direction he had come.

~*******~

When I finally pried Edward away from me, I began my drive back home. Half way there, I received a call from my Editor asking about a few stories I had been working on.

I was lucky to have a job with such flexibility and it got me thinking again to the house we would be trying to build soon. When the baby was born, I would want to stay home with him…or her. I would need a complete office set up so that I would be able to recreate the environment in which I was used to working in.

By the time I got home, I was exhausted. Emotionally, I was just out of anything else to give. I still had a lot of writing ahead of me, but I figured I could chip away at it after some rest. I went to my room and smiled when I saw Edwards clothes draped over the foot board.

I slipped off my shoes and crawled into the center. When I laid my head back I grabbed the pillow Edward had been using and snuggled up to it. I don't know how long I stayed awake after that, but I fell asleep to the calming scent that was all him.

**EPOV**** (No Such Thing**)

The rest of my afternoon was beyond busy. I was crammed into surgeries and rounds throughout the day until round six o'clock pm. After that the busy still continued, but it was full of helping with the short staff in other areas...

I was looking for any spare moment to call Bella and check on her, but one never presented itself. I knew that if she didn't hear from me she wouldn't be upset. Bella understood the demands of my job and never complained about my lack of calls. In fact, she always demanded that I not worry about it and focus on doing my work.

I was lucky to have her, and the fact that I was able to keep something so amazing never went without thanks. Luckily, for me, I was able to skate through my day with the escape of our appointment earlier.

I went to lie down in the on-call room to catch an hour of sleep. When I got in there the first thing I did was send Bella a text.

How are you feeling love?

I didn't expect her to answer seeing as it was already three in the morning, but I felt my phone buzz on the cushion next to me.

We are fine. Just work and don't worry~Bella

She said we. I felt my heart beat a little louder and stronger at the image of Bella resting and nurturing our baby. The image stirred some very powerful emotions in me and now the thought of being away from her was physically draining me.

I cringed at the situation and huffed out my frustrations before responding.

Not likely Bella. I'll always worry.

I would...there would never be a time that I wouldn't be consumed with thoughts of those two. I didn't get a response, and I figured she had fallen asleep. I closed my eyes and took advantage of the little bit of rest I was being rewarded with.

~******~

I had ended up working closer to forty hours rather than thirty two. Every extra minute spent in that hospital was like torture. I would complete any task given to me only to be faced with a new one. We were short staff, and me having just taken many days freely, I nominated to stay and cover the slack.

When I finally walked out of those doors, I was drained completely. My legs were rubber and my eyes were hanging on by a thread. I sat down in my driver's seat and exhaled a loud breath as my body relished the leather surrounding my body.

I couldn't decide what to do. It was Sunday afternoon right now and it had been Thursday afternoon when I had last seen Bella. I grabbed my phone and hit two on my speed dial.

It went straight to voice mail and I felt myself actually drop a little. I missed her; I didn't want to go to my empty home without her. I wanted to find myself curled up to Bella and sleeping in her bed. I especially wanted to have her body near my own while I held her to me and heard about her recent experiences as a mother to be.

I was still sitting in my car when the phone rang. I looked down and saw Bella's name and number flashing across the screen. I hit talk and spoke louder than I intended.

"Bella?"

I heard her laugh a little before responding.

"Hi baby, I'm sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower."

I groaned at the image of Bella naked in the shower. I needed her again in a painful way and I didn't want to wait anymore.

"I was just calling to see if you were home...I just got off and I wanted to at least see you before I fell asleep for hours to come..."

"I'm here Edward...come to me and I'll rest with you a bit."

That was all the encouragement I needed. I started my car and headed toward my love. I stayed on the phone with her the entire drive. She told me about her last few days in the office and how she had been on the internet looking up information on her first trimester. I smiled at her enthusiasm and then at her hesitancy over maternity clothes.

When I pulled into her building, I was filled with renewed energy. I didn't feel tired anymore, only anxious to see her again. I made it half way down the hall, when I saw her peek her head out of the door. I smiled and went to her with a light run the rest of the way.

When I made it through the door, she closed it and I stood still. Bella was standing there in a nice little red sundress barefoot. I smiled to her and grabbed her by the waist so that I could greet her properly. I kissed her gently at first then with more need. She followed my lead and pulled me flush against her as she ran her hands into my hair and caressed my scalp.

When Bella held me like that all my worries would slip away and all that would matter is us. Our kiss began to slow and I continued to nip at her lips and jaw. When we finally pulled away, I brought my attention to her stomach and dropped to one knee. I held her torso flush with my cheek and attached my arms to her like a life line.

She stood there for a while with me as I greeted the two most important beings in my life. When I was done having a silent conversation with her stomach, I stood and kissed her head before walking hand and hand with her to the bedroom.

Bella insisted I take a shower first, before sleeping and I agreed. I stripped down and walked around the room gathering my clothes from the bag I had left here last. Bella stayed propped up next to the bathroom door while we talked and I sifted through my things.

When I had everything in my hand I turned back toward Bella to get in the shower, but when I did I saw Bella standing there in only her red lace panties and matching strapless bra. I took in a sharp breath and stared unashamedly at her gorgeous form before I made my way to her.

"Love, are you going to shower with me?"

She pressed her palms against my chest and shook her head to me a little before getting on her tip toes and whispering in my ear.

"No, I'll be waiting for you though..." She had said the words so soft and breathy that my skin had burst into goose bumps. I shivered visibly and pulled her to me for a deep kiss. I couldn't bring myself to part from her, so I didn't.

I dropped my clothes where I stood and gently pulled Bella up my body. I was thankful to be naked already, and even more thankful for the soft lace that was my only barrier from her body. For the longest time I just caressed her back and bottom while we kissed. She didn't search for more and seemed to be content with everything and anything I chose to give her.

After what seemed like forever, I made my way to her bed and continued kissing her while I lowered her to the mattress. I needed her now far more than I did when I had thought of her while leaving my shift. This wasn't carnal lust...this was love. Love for the woman who was carrying our baby and holding my world. I gave her everything I had in me...between the kisses and the touches my love for her began to climb into un-chartered territory. It was so strong that I pulled away briefly to properly let the emotions sit inside me.

We came together and whispered our love for one another through every push and thrust our bodies delivered to the other. Bella was more gorgeous and breathtaking than I had remembered. Being away from her for these extended periods of time let me appreciate her fully each time we reunited.

When we had both recovered from our love making, we stayed in bed facing each other and simply talking. We talked about the baby and our appointment; we spoke of our hopes and dreams for him or her when they finally arrived. I had never felt so complete in all my years and I doubted anything would ever compare to this experience I was sharing with Bella.

Before we could get distracted, I had a question I needed to ask her. I held her face and kissed her nose before I began.

"Bella...how do you think your family will react about the baby?"

I said it gently because I didn't want to make her nervous. I was curious to learn this answer because during our twisted and scattered relationship, I had only once heard about Bella's parents. The only thing I knew is that her mother had taught Kindergarten and her father was the chief of police in a small town.

Bella didn't say anything at first, but when she looked up into my eyes I saw pain there and immediately felt regret for putting it there. She took a deep breath and began.

"Well...I don't know, really. I haven't seen my dad in years...we were never very close to begin with, but when I left for Yale it became even more strained to see or even talk to him." She looked down and had a frown on her face. She continued.

"My mom is a bit...different I guess you could say. We used to be very close. She was more of a best friend than anything, but she was more the child and I the adult while growing up."

I laid there listening to her, while stroking her cheek. This was making her uncomfortable and I was about to tell her she didn't need to speak about it, but she was angry now when she continued.

"She didn't want me to go to Yale...she didn't want me to go to college! She kept saying how it wasn't for people like me and that I would just fail out and be embarrassed..."

I was sitting up in shock now. I felt anger dripping through my veins at the thought of anyone putting down Bella's intelligence. I didn't care if it was her mother...for all I cared it could of been the pope and that still wouldn't of mattered to me. Those words had obviously been living in her and driving her to the non existent social life she had admitted to my family at dinner about. This is why her strict rules were in place when it came to her time at Yale.

I pulled Bella to my body, while I kissed her head and shoulders. I dropped love to her body at whatever place I could get to and then looked her square in the eyes.

"Bella, _Yale_ was made for people like _you_. Driven and intelligent people who have the world at their hands and don't even know it...you have accomplished an amazing thing there all on your own and I don't care if she _is _your mother...no one has the right to knock your accomplishments...okay?

I kissed her head again and held her to me firmly. She nodded her head and pulled back to keep going.

"I know that now...it took me a while to get here mentally, but I'm here...remember how Paul said that he tried to reach me after graduation?"

I just nodded and kept my gaze locked with hers.

"Well, I sent my mother and father invitations to my graduation. My dad sent me a letter with some money and it said that he wasn't able to come...he had some things he was committed to and he couldn't break them. I was sad he wouldn't be able to make it...I had always dreamed of him seeing me accomplish that goal. Not for his sake, but for mine. I wanted him to see that even though he wasn't present in my life, I had turned out good...and a responsible person."

I saw her eyes watering and turning red. I was getting sicker by the second; as I listened to her tell me this. I began hating myself again for the betrayal I had put her through. She had been through enough disappointment in her young life and was only seeking my love when I had hurt her so deeply. I was mentally berating myself for all I had done when I saw tears drop faster now and with more force from her gently shaking body.

"Well then, I received a call from my mom...she told me she was not coming and that I shouldn't have bothered to invite her. I was hurt to say the least, that she felt that way, but when she told me why I almost died."

Bella took a deep breath and began the painful story that was her mother.

"She said that she didn't appreciate me trying to make her look incompetent. She said she was aware of my plans to try and make her feel inferior to me and that even with a degree, I wouldn't be more than a small town girl trying to fit in a world that I didn't ever belong in."

I was furious now. I had to get out of the bed and take a deep breath, my body was shaking and my jaw actually hurt from the way I had it set against my teeth. I turned and saw Bella with a sad expression and still crying. I put my anger aside and held her. I couldn't understand anyone who would ever willingly make her hurt. She was amazing and beautiful...inside and out. I vowed then that no one would ever make her hurt or feel that way again. I would do anything to keep those people from her and away from our baby..

I was mentally finding ways to search for them and give them a piece of my mind when I heard her whisper again.

"It was the last time I ever talked to her. I changed my phone number and removed myself from having forwarding mail. I started fresh here in Chicago, I lived with a friend of my grandmothers, while I was job hunting and working to save for this place...I never thought or spoke of them again, until just now..."

I nodded my understanding and thought seriously before I could say anything to her. I was touched, that she had trusted me enough to share it and that she was aware of how terribly wrong her mother was.

I held her face in my hands and kissed her softly. I hoped that she felt the all consuming love in that kiss; I never wanted her to doubt the strength, her love had given me.

"You don't ever have to speak of it again, if you don't want to Bella...this is our baby, and we can do this anyway you want. You have me...and my family, we all love you Bella."

She smiled to me and then it slowly faded from her face. I was concerned that I had said something wrong, but she spoke up about what was worrying her, before I could ask.

"Will they be upset Edward? We haven't had the easiest relationship, you and I...and...well will they think this is foolish and irresponsible?"

Her brow was furrowed and her face was genuinely concerned. I knew she meant my mother, because my father's expression on Thursday was one for the books of happiness.

"No, Bella. My mother will, more than likely, cry from happiness and my dad...well you saw my dad." I kissed her nose and continued

"Now Alice will more than likely, get on your nerves, she will spoil and pamper you in hopes that you'll let her dress you and the baby for life...seriously...she's weird like that."

Bella was smiling again and giggled while I went on and on about how my family would be excited for us. I grabbed her hand and kissed her ring when it caught the sun from the window.

We laid down and rested quietly in each others arms. No words were said as I held her body and rubbed our baby. I was just thinking about ways to propose, but was pulled from the thought by my cell ringing. I grabbed it from the stand and stayed in my laying position with Bella draped over me while I answered.

"Hello?"

"Mr. Edward Cullen please." said a man's excited voice. I had no idea who it was, when I confirmed my identity.

"Ah, Mr. Cullen, this is Bo Daniels here at Mercedes. I was calling you back in regards to the inquiry you had on the ML320. As I understand, you're looking to buy your wife one in preparation for your new arrival? Is that correct?"

Bo's voice wasn't very quiet and it didn't surprise me when I saw Bella sit straight up and turn to me with wide eyes and a small smile playing at her lips. I winked and rubbed her bare breast with my free hand as she stared down at me.

It must have done something to her, because she leaned over to my free ear and whispered, "Mmm... love, you shouldn't start something you can't finish."

She kissed her way down my body and made herself comfortable between my legs as I tried to carry on this conversation with Bo. Bella kissed everything, but my straining erection and it was driving me mad with need. I continued to speak of cost and warranty with Bo, but my head processed nothing but the dangerously close feeling of Bella's tongue over my head.

Two could play that game. I told Bo I would take it in white, fully loaded and ready to be picked up by the end of the day, to be paid in cash. As those final words left me, I felt Bella's warm tongue envelop me to the hilt and I stuttered a good bye before I started moaning into the receiver. She didn't stop when the call ended; she actually became more frenzied with me as I ran my fingers through her hair in thanks.

I was lost in the feeling of Bella's tongue when I felt her soft little hand begin to play with my balls. That was my undoing and I told her quickly I was coming so she could move, but she didn't. She took me faster and deeper while I came hard into her mouth.

I actually saw bright lights behind my lids and it took longer than normal to recover from the beauty of her doing anything to me. When I opened my eyes I saw a grinning Bella leaning over me with happy eyes.

"Are you mad at me love?" I knew she wasn't, but I wanted to make sure all the same.

"No, Edward. I thought to myself that if you were able to make it happen while I did that to you, then you should be able to buy whatever your heart desired..."

I didn't know if she realized this was her car, so I tested the waters a bit before admitting it.

"So your going to let me take care of you baby?" I was sincere and there was no hint of humor anywhere near my voice. She looked at me just as serious and nodded her head and answered.

"Yes...I understand why you want to and I get what you said about it being your role...just...please, try not to go over board."

I smiled at her omission and tried out my new found freedom on her.

"Good, because I just bought you a brand new Mercedes ML320. You can keep it in the extra spot while the house is being built."

Her face was shocked and then her eyes were tight, but playful.

"Hmm...You sure work fast Cullen."

I just grinned and kissed her one last time before taking her fully once more...


	24. Chapter 24

I took into this chapter a review I got. I agree that Bella was getting a bit on the annoying side two chapters ago, but didn't we all when we were pregnant?

I did however give her the strength we all loved in this chapter, so I hope you find her back to herself...even if its just a bit. Also, this will be the start of them living together... Enjoy!

* * *

**BPOV (Feel The Shift)**

Time passed relatively peaceful. After Edward and I had rested that Sunday, I drove him to the dealership to pick up _our _new vehicle. Edward was quite charming when he wanted to be, so I did my best to hold my ground. We came to the agreement that we did indeed need something bigger than my car and definitely his.

I finally had him agree to let me carry the insurance and handle all maintenance as well. He just smiled wide for a moment without a word and then agreed to it. I didn't know why, but I had this feeling that he had something brewing already because that was way too easy to get him to agree to.

After I had dropped him off, I ran my errands for the day and did some light grocery shopping. I made sure to pick up a lot of veggies and even more fruit. Wine would no longer be accompanying me for my dinners, so I grabbed some sparkling cider and plenty more juices for the house.

When my dry cleaning was picked up and all the food had been bought I made my way back home and dialed Edwards's number.

"Hey, Love. Are you home yet?" He sounded excited and I couldn't help but smile at his warm tone.

"Headed there now...will you be staying with me tonight?" I was aware at how hopeful I sounded even to myself, but it paid off when I heard him say that he was just grabbing some things from his place and heading back over.

I wanted him that much, I was sure of. I put myself out there and just let the wind take us where ever it may when I asked him, "Will you grab a lot of stuff? I want you with me always...especially when you're just off a long shift..."

I bit my lip and smiled while I waited. I didn't doubt that he would more than likely want that too, and I wasn't about to play coy anymore. He had proved and reassured me more than enough times in the last few days of what it was he wanted. I was ready to accept it all and be on my way with the positive vibes.

"Absolutely, love...and when I get home I'll make us some dinner."

I was grinning like a fool now and it was more than fine with me. He and I had shed too many tears and we were finally getting the happiness we both deserved.

~******~

Time marched on over the next several days. Edward slept while I worked and would wake me in the night to make love before he had to leave for a shift. It was comfortable and we began to get in a rhythm. I loved waking to his kisses and longed for his soothing touch as I drifted off to sleep.

Excitement was in the air today, and we were both anxious for the evening. Tonight would be the night we had been waiting for, because this evening we were telling all the Cullen's about the baby and our plans for a house. I wasn't nervous anymore and it actually felt relaxing to finally be able to tell them the news.

It was to be an early dinner around five pm, and we were going to wait until after dessert to announce the news. I had bought a brand new dress for the occasion and even had spent a day at the spa. After I had been pampered, waxed and shined I made my way home in my brand new SUV that cost more than my salary this year alone.

Edward had his car kept in storage until he decided what he wanted to get, and had now taken to driving my Volvo. He said that I needed to drive the Mercedes now because god forbid, I was in an accident, this vehicle was like a tank and could keep me safe from any major harm.

I think I argued for about two good minutes before I remembered the promise I had made myself at the hospital and dropped it.

This happened a lot throughout our last four days. He would come up with this half baked idea and I would try to talk him down from the ledge. It didn't take me long to realize that I needed to pick my battles wisely and as long as he wasn't dropping another sixty thousand dollars on me, I would be just fine.

Also, over the last four days we had come to a great understanding about the house as well. I wasn't about to let him be the only one contributing to this life changing move, so we agreed that I would be able to invest a large amount into the furnishing and design portion. I had savings and with the sale of my place I would be able to comfortably make our space wonderful.

With having some of the bigger things off my shoulders, I began to snap back to the me, I knew. The only difference was that I no longer drank wine and I now had to stay away from sushi. My insecurities were taking a back seat and I stopped fussing over the stupid things that were consuming me earlier on.

If Edward bought dinner, I didn't complain or even make a face. I would thank him and then happily ask for desert.

I thought of all these things as I drove back home to get dressed with Edward, before we left in an hour for his family's home.

When I arrived back at my place, I grabbed my bags of new items and locked up the car, then headed for the elevator with my large bottle of water in hand.

I made my way inside and headed to the bedroom to find Edward. When I walked in I heard the shower running and Edward humming a tune.

I went to sneak a peek at his form through the fogged glass and when I stepped in I smiled at the sight before me.

Edward was naked and his back was to me, so I could see his tight butt flexing, while he washed. I announced myself and I heard the water turn off. He popped his head out of the glass and smiled when he saw me.

"Love, you are positively glowing...did you have a nice day at the spa?"

I smiled and nodded before moving my relaxed body to his for a kiss.

"I did...it was so peaceful and relaxing. I also went and bought a new dress for tonight as well...want to see it?"

He stepped from the shower nodding his head and grabbing a towel before following me to the bed.

I grabbed my JCrew bag and pulled out my calf length dress. It was Caspian Blue and V-neck with a fitted bodice and an empire waist.

He came up behind me and kissed my neck while he rubbed my stomach and admired my find.

"Its perfect, Love. That color looks lovely against your skin." He whispered into my ear as he held me from behind.

I rested my head against his shoulder and closed my eyes as a smile played at my lips. I was ready to share this news with his family and even more ready to face their reaction; whatever it may be. I knew that as long as I had Edward beside me, I would be able to handle anything.

~******~

We were dressed and on our way. We were only five minutes from the Cullen home. Edward was driving us in the new car and holding my hand while rubbing soothing circles over my palm. I laid my head back and enjoyed the view as we made our way through the roads.

Edward was as cool as ever tonight. He didn't seem to be nervous or anxious in the least. I turned my head to face him and smiled gently, so he could see I was feeling the same way.

We didn't speak about anything; we just enjoyed the comfortable silence and muted noises coming from the radio. I thought of how right this felt and how I hoped that we would continue to be this way, even in the years to come.

I felt the car slow and snapped from my thoughts as I saw the Cullen's home in front of me. There was a shiny black BMW sitting in the drive and I could only assume it was Jasper's.

I laughed a little at the reality of what we were about to do as I unbuckled my seatbelt, and before I could open my door Edward was there holding out a hand for me to take. I kissed his lips lightly and held his arm as we made our way inside.

Edward let us in and called out to his parents as we made our way through the foyer. I could smell many different things hitting me all at once and to my surprise I felt my stomach churn. I gripped on tighter to Edwards arm and it caught his attention. I turned to go back outside, but he was holding me to him and preventing me from being able to.

"Edward....please....let go!" He looked stunned and released me. I went straight for the door and took in a deep cleansing breath. I heard footsteps next to me and then arms around my shoulders.

"Love...what's wrong? Are you okay?" His tone was worried and low. I could only nod my head for the time being as I got that smell out of my system.

Finally, I was able to think again and I turned toward him and fell into his arms.

"It was the smell...it was just too much. I don't know if I can stick with it for the evening."

I saw a gentle smile on his face now and he kissed my forehead lightly and ran his fingers over my cheek while nodding.

"We'll figure something out okay?"

I just nodded and went to sit in the car. Edward pulled out his phone and dialed a number.

I sat back and took in the new leather seat scent greedily. I wanted to get the smell of the house out of my nose as quickly as possible. Edward came to my side after hanging up and opened my door.

"Come on, love. We'll walk around back instead of going through the house."

He walked with me and rubbed my back while dropping kisses to my hair. I was thankful for whatever arrangements he had made to spare me that walk again.

When we were around the corner and out of sight from the main lawn, Edward stopped us and pulled me in for a deep kiss. I went with it and threw myself into his arms more fully while he wrapped his arms securely around my body.

After a few moments we pulled away and he brought his forehead to mine.

"I love you so much, Bella." He rubbed my stomach and dropped a kiss to my lips once more before we continued on to the back.

When we came around the corner, I saw Carlisle sitting with Jasper and Alice on the lawn furniture. Edward greeted everyone loudly to announce our presence and I echoed him with my hellos.

Carlisle walked straight up to Edward and said something into his ear privately. I saw Edward nod and mumble something that sounded like, "_probably best_."

Carlisle then came to me with a happy smile and a warm hug to welcome me. Alice and Jasper both gave their standard kiss to the cheek and hug before squaring back to their orchestrated positions that their bodies unconsciously did.

Before long Esme was making her way outside and with her she was carrying a bottle of wine. I stiffened slightly and gripped Edwards's hand. I didn't mean to, but I looked to Carlisle with a nervous expression. He returned it, but recovered quickly and smiled to Esme.

"Dear, we should start off with something light before dinner don't you think?"

She cocked her eye brow and laughed at his suggestion as she poured glasses for each of us.

"Nonsense...we're celebrating our family finally being together! Besides Carlisle, it's just wine. Don't be such a prude."

She winked and kissed him on the lips as she handed him his glass. I was next to receive one and soon we were all holding one.

I felt Edward lean into me and then whisper into my ear, "If they toast, just hold it to your lips and keep them closed tightly." He made the whole thing look as if he was just kissing my cheek, and no one gave us a second glance.

I tried to give him a reassuring smile, but I think it came out looking like a frown. I heard Esme call to me and I turned my attention to her.

"Bella, sweetie! Come and join me in the kitchen, I hate that I haven't seen you as much as I'd like to...Alice, you get in here too!"

I was really on the verge of tears now. Not real ones that indicate sadness, but the ones you cry because you really, _really_ don't want to do something. I knew that I wouldn't be able to handle two seconds in that house with those smells. I glanced to Edward for help and he gave me a torn look, it seemed like he was debating over what to do, but then finally something flickered across his face.

He stood and addressed his parents.

Actually, Mom…Dad...could you stay out here with us for a moment? Alice…Jasper...you too."

I looked up at him with a relieved expression. He was going to do this now, not later. _Thank God! _He extended his hand to me and pulled me to my feet along side him.

I took the moment to scan the room and was met with three anxious expressions and one very knowing look.

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and held me closer while he spoke.

"Everyone...Bella and I are going to have a baby...she's pregnant."

The words came out bold and proud. I was smiling at the expression on his face as he looked to each family member to confirm their stare.

I looked around and saw Esme was wearing a thrilled expression and had her hands crossed over her chest. Alice and Jasper were sitting with shocked smiles, but stood almost on time with each other and made their way to hug Edward and me.

Many squeals were making their way from Alice to my ears and Jasper's congratulations, managed to be just as loud.

When we were finally released from the hugs and kisses of Alice and Jasper, we turned our direction to the heads of the family.

Esme had tears that were still accompanying her bright smile and Carlisle's face was just as enthused. Esme strode over and pulled me to her while she exclaimed her excitement. I was passed to Carlisle then and he held me at my arms gently as he smiled softly.

"Children are a wonderful blessing Bella...I wish you both happiness and longevity in this remarkable experience."

He kissed my head again and I released tears that were symbolic of my relief. When I turned back to Esme, she was still hugging Edward and crying as she went on about good nutrition and nurturing a pregnant woman.

When she released him, I saw her looking around in frenzy and when she spotted me, she came to my side again and held my face softly.

"Oh, Bella. Congratulations, sweetheart...this is amazing news." I just smiled to her and nodded because my voice was lost in the sea of tears, I was leaking from my eyes. I couldn't stop smiling and my face was even hurting, but I didn't care. Everyone went on with questions about how far along I was and when did we find out.

I was flustered from the excitement and I held onto Edward to keep me grounded. He held me to him as we sat and went through our first appointment with excitement. Edward told everyone how he had bought the new _Mercedes _for me and the baby and everyone there just smiled and nodded, not shocked, as if he had said he bought me candy and roses to celebrate. Carlisle even added that Edward needed something bigger to drive as well.

Esme and Alice changed seats so that they were right next to me. We talked about everything babies. Esme regaled me with stories of Edward and Alice as infants but did it all with longing in her eyes. At one point she turned to Carlisle and they shared a very intimate silence.

I looked over to Edward to see how he was doing and was met with the most wonderful sight. He was on the edge of his seat and leaning his elbows on his knees as he listened to his dad tell him about great physicians and even the best places to deliver. Edward turned his head to me and I saw the excitement in his face as he met my smiling expression.

We continued on this way for a long while, but then Esme jumped up and ran in the house. She came out minutes later with a defeated look and a somber expression.

"I hate to break the news...but I forgot about dinner and it is, unfortunately, burnt."

I went to her and hugged her. I hated that she looked so sad after having been so excited just moments before. She hugged me back and pulled back with a thoughtful expression.

Edward stood and gave his solution for this small set back.

"Okay, everyone get your things and let's head out. Dinner is on me tonight, we're celebrating the newest Cullen's impending arrival."

Carlisle stood and clapped once loudly in agreement. He mirrored Edwards's sentiment about celebrating and led us all out of the house. Before we could reach the door, Edward led us around the corner and we once again walked around the property to reach our vehicle.

When we had finally made it to the front, we saw everyone gathered in the circle drive waiting for us. I laughed a little as they all had sympathetic looks on their faces. Esme came to me and hugged me to her as she spoke.

"Oh, sweetie. Just keep me posted on the smells you really grow to like and vice versa. I'll do everything I can to make sure you don't get sick like that here if I can help it."

Carlisle was next to her now and he just smiled and winked to me. I realized that Edward must have shared my discomfort with him earlier and that he was the one who he had called about our new situation when we had first arrived.

I apologized to Esme out of habit, but she told me it was nonsense. She said that she was always surrounded by lavender when she was pregnant and that she had kept fresh pieces in her home to fight the nausea she would get in the mornings.

I made a mental note to visit a plant nursery and find some that appealed to me as well. I was about to tell Edward about my idea, but he had already leaned down to my ear and whispered, "We'll go tomorrow and get anything you'd like to have around you love..."

"We're going to Naha." Jasper announced.

"I just called and they have a private room waiting for us." Alice was holding on to him and nodding in excitement. I smiled to her and she came to me quickly and wrapped me in a warm hug.

"Bella! I'm so excited for you both! This baby will be so lucky to have you as a mother...your amazing Bella."

I felt tears in my eyes from the wonderful sentiment she had just shared. I had worried briefly, how I would be as a mother, I always wanted to have children, but I just didn't know what I would be like as a mother. I never wanted to be my mom, and it scared me a little that I didn't know anything other than her.

Edward wrapped his arms around me and rested his hands on my belly. I rested against his chest and turned to smile at him. When I did, he kissed me softly and whispered his love for me against my lips.

I became aware of eyes on us and I felt the heat rise up to my cheeks at the intimate display we had just shared. Everyone just smiled to us and then Edward kissed me again.

We all decided to take separate vehicles and meet at the restaurant, so everyone went their own way and we piled in our cars.

Edward helped me into the seat and waited for me to be buckled, before kissing me again. He made his way around and started up the car.

We were pulling out and now following behind Jasper and Alice. Edward reached for my hand after he was fully shifted and then broke the comfortable quiet.

"How are you feeling, Baby?" He was still smiling and his eyes were bright. I looked at him and my heart almost burst from happiness.

"I'm feeling really good right now, Edward. I'm actually more than good...I am...happy" The silly grin was in place on my face right now and I couldn't have cared less. I was happy...truly happy for the first time in a very long time.

I couldn't think of another time in my life that would be able to touch this feeling. Even my college graduation wasn't filled with this much peace. I could only remember the morning I woke up with Edward, peppering me with kisses and holding me tightly to his side after that fateful meeting, but even that day was lacking compared to this all consuming joy.

Edward caressed my arm while he drove and whispered, "Me too love...me too."

~******~

Dinner was phenomenal; we had all made our way into the private dining room of _NAHA _and settled into a comfortable conversation. We had managed to eat _and _talk; it was a feat I had never accomplished before.

Everyone was eager to learn about our decisions regarding the condos as well as our new house hunt. I was still open to finding one that was on the market, but Edward seemed to be set in having one built.

Jasper and Alice offered to help us in anyway they could regarding the selling and looking, and Esme and Carlisle graciously extended their same offer. We were both grateful for it, between Edwards schedule and my appointments, as well as work; we would need any help they could offer us.

Edward and I spoke a little about our plans to for the near future and everyone followed along happily as we went on about our growing family. At one point it sounded as if we were already and old married couple and I playfully furrowed my brow.

Esme saw me and gave me a playful grin before asking, "What is it, Bella?"

I bit the side of my bottom lip playfully and then scrunched up my nose when I answered her with a question.

"Is this weird for you all? I mean, we're not really doing this conventionally...ya know?"

Esme just laughed and waved her hand at me. "Bella, conventional is overrated...just be happy."

Carlisle nodded his head in agreement and Edwards arm held my body closer. He would rub my arm affectionately and whisper his love through out the evening. It was just like the night we had first met; however we were no longer the same.

When the bill arrived Edward, Jasper and Carlisle all fought for the folder. Each one was demanding on paying the celebratory feast and we women just sat back and watched them all squabble over their reasons.

Finally, Carlisle won the bout by pulling the "Dad card" and both Jasper and Edward gracefully let it go. Edward was still as excited as when we first announced our news and even though I knew he was thrilled with the way everyone received it, he was a bit disappointed in not being able to pay the check.

I leaned over to him and rested my head on his shoulder. He looked down to me and kissed my nose then my head. I snuggled closer and asked him something I knew would make him happy.

"Will you take me for some ice cream, baby?" He smiled so wide and I returned it.

"Anything for you my love..."

When it was time to go, we all departed and headed down to the Valet. Edward kept a secure grasp on me as we stood together and waited for the car. I was talking with Esme about days for her to come and meet with Edward and me. I heard Jasper whistle in approval when the familiar white SUV came around the front and Edward claimed his keys.

Carlisle and Jasper both slapped his back and gave him their approval on his purchase. I just rolled my eyes and giggled at them. Edward made sure they understood it was mine and then Carlisle really gave his approval.

"I'm proud to see you taking all the right steps Edward...you remind me of me when I found out your mother was pregnant with you." He held his shoulder firmly and then patted it before turning to me.

"Ah sweet, Bella...congratulations to you again. If you need anything while Edwards at work, or whenever...just give us a call. No matter how big or small the request may seem...were here for you."

I nodded my understanding and hugged him tightly. Edward and I gave everyone a departing hug and loaded into the vehicle.

Soon, it was just he and I and it felt good to have that as my reality. We drove back toward home and as promised we stopped at an ice cream Shoppe.

After he bought me my two scoops of rocky road and his mint chocolate chip, we sat in a corner of the store and ate our dessert in laughs and love. It was all just so perfect and I knew that life would catch up to us, but right now this was all I wanted to concern myself with, and Edward didn't seem to mind one bit.


	25. Chapter 25

**Songs for this chapter: All Good Things (come to an end)**

rangernstephfan (Tina) finished the edit right after it posted...here it is in its best form! Thanks Tina...I know your a busy woman and I appreciate you taking the time!

* * *

**EPOV (All Good Things (Come To An End))**

After that evening with my family, Bella and I continued on our road to the unknown. It had been three months since that dinner, and our lives had settled into an even routine. I would work my shifts and Bella would write. I made every appointment and pampered her whenever I was able to be in her presence.

Many nights I would just lie in bed while she slept and admire her beauty. I would kiss her body and concentrate on her belly. I was in love with that tiny life already, and I hadn't even known if it was a boy or a girl.

My love for Bella multiplied as well. There was a time I had thought that I could love her no more than I already did, but then she would bring home a new book to read about pregnancy or even a baby blanket she couldn't walk away from and my heart would swell that much more.

I was happy, there was no other word to describe the way I awoke each day. I now had a purpose, and it was the only thing I would ever want to live for...my family.

Bella was the key to everything in my life right now. She held and carried everything I held dear. I knew that at times I was driving her mad when I would fuss or worry over her, but I did it anyway because I was certain that either way it needed to be done. She had always taken care of herself, and I relished the fact that it was I, who would now be taking care of her; and I did.

I had moved into Bella's place officially a week after announcing our news. We had Paul over for a dinner shortly after and told him as well. True to form he managed to crack only about a half hour worth of jokes regarding condoms and birth control, but for the most part was happy for us.

He helped me close up my condo as we loaded up the _320_ with loads of my necessities and boxed the rest for charity. I wanted none of it, I planned on beginning fresh with Bella. That meant leaving my past behind me, so whatever Paul didn't want we had picked up by Goodwill.

Every morning I would leave for an eighteen hour shift, and before I did that I made sure to prepare a small breakfast for Bella. She fussed at first, but then miraculously stopped mid sentence one morning and kissed me. She never complained about it again, and instead when I arrived home there would be a small thank you note with a dinner plate in the oven.

Now understand that this is only the stuff I have chosen to remember. I have also come home many nights to an angry, tired or heartbroken Bella. It wasn't often, but when it happened my foundation would crack a little and I felt helpless.

Small things annoyed her, and I couldn't make it right by an apology. She was trivial to me most times when this would occur. I actually stood in the kitchen one evening after a twenty two hour shift while she yelled at me about how to properly load a dishwasher. There were many times I received this welcome only to be scolded about replacing a half full juice carton or even the way I loaded a toilet paper roll....apparently you can do it wrong, and I now placed it with the paper to be pulled down instead of under. It was engrained into my damn head!

I folded towels wrong and didn't know the first thing about a woman's bathroom. Almost immediately after she would rant, she would break down and apologize. I learned that the cry would come eventually and I would then be able to hold and comfort her. It made taking the scolding worth it, so I didn't complain.

During all this time, my mother had helped us design our home. I loved how involved Bella became in all the details and it made me proud to be able to give her this. She had a say in all of it, and my mother adored her desire to make this home spectacular. Money was no longer an issue for Bella and it made the feat that much easier to accomplish.

My place was on the market and we decided to hold onto Bella's as a property investment since it was well located and in a desirable neighborhood. Our home was well on the way to begin construction and that gave us a deadline of just under five months to get it completed and furnished before the baby was born. I knew that it was tight and for most people it would be unreasonable, however, when money wasn't an issue and your mother was a slave driver this was something that easily became our reality.

My parents would come visit us once a week and while my mother and Bella went over colors and fabrics, I would tell my father over a beer about all the ways I was screwing up in Bella's eyes. He would spend the rest of his visit telling me some of his battle stories with my mother when she was pregnant and I was hopeful that this was just Bella's hormones. She was usually very laid back and easy going, but with the weather changes and her body changing shape so did her emotions.

I rolled with the punches and did what I could to make her happy. When she had her weekends off I would send her to the spa for the day. I made sure she had all the things she loved and wanted when I sent her for her relaxation. I had a card on file and anytime she made an appointment my card would be read and booked.

I was benefiting more from her perfectly smooth and waxed body than she was, so this was a demand I would fight for. She never made a complaint though and when she would arrive home I would "inspect" to make sure they did everything up to par...I was greedy that way.

I loved her growing form and told and showed her everyday. Our love life was just as rewarding as it always was and for the most part we were at each other more so than we used to be.

~****~

Tonight, I was coming home to Bella after thirty two straight hours of hell. I was tired and hungry, but mostly I was anxious to see my prize wrapped tightly under the covers of the bed.

I walked into the room and made my way around in the dark. It was just past midnight and I knew Bella would be sleeping so I tried to be as quiet as possible so not to wake her.

I had just turned on the light in the bathroom and turned to sneak a peak at my love before getting in the shower, when I realized the bed was empty. The comforter and sheets were all tangled up and thrown to the side, so I knew she had been in them.

I panicked and turned on all the lights. I felt my chest tighten and my lungs close as I looked around the empty space surrounding me. I started calling out to her in hopes she would respond.

"Bella! Bella. Baby where are you?" I could hear the panic in my own ears and when I received just dead silence back, my nerves went into overdrive. Every horrible scene of a pregnant Bella collapsed somewhere in the house had crippled my ability to speak. I was going from room to room in haste trying to see where she may be.

Every room was empty of her and I had even rechecked to make sure I hadn't missed her if she was passed out on the floor somewhere.

I ran into the kitchen to see if there was a note on the counter, but there was only a thank you written on a post it stuck to my dinner plate.

I had just grabbed the phone and was about to dial 911 when I heard the door to the living room open. I jumped around the corner and saw Bella there holding a bag and a drink in her hands. Her face was confused as she looked around at all the lights and then she saw me.

"Hi baby...did you just get here?" She sounded so relaxed and calm. I strode to her and took her into my arms and collapsed my head into her hair. I breathed her in and felt my heart rate slow down from the panicking pulse it was.

"God baby....where did you go?! I was so scared something had happened to you..."

I kissed her face and hair and held her securely to me. I heard and felt the bag she was holding hitting my back as she embraced me tightly as well.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I fell asleep after dinner and when I woke up I just had to have a chili dog...I thought I would beat you home so I didn't bother with a note...I'm sorry baby."

I felt bad for many reasons, but the most dominate one was that she had just had her first late night craving and I hadn't been there to get it. I knew it was stupid and that I should just be glad she was okay and home, but it hurt. I wanted to be able to fulfill all her needs and this was the first one I had missed.

The disappointment was very evident on my face still as I looked down at her.

"Edward...are you mad at me? I'm sorry if I scared you...but I really wanted one and I didn't really think it through..."

I shook my head and smiled as best I could to her. I kissed her lips and tasted the faint flavor of chili.

"No Baby...I'm not mad. Just sorry that I wasn't here to take care of you." I held her to me again and then walked back to the kitchen with my arm around her waist.

We sat at the island while I ate my dinner and she finished off two more chili dogs. I couldn't help but smile as I watched her eating so happily. I was glad that at least I got to be here with her while she succumbed to her craving and found her comfort.

She was yawning as I loaded my plate in the dishwasher and when I went to grab her bag and trash, she tried to stop me and do it herself. I confused her with a long kiss and then sent her to the bed to lie down.

I shut all the lights and double checked the locks and headed back down the hall to bed. When I walked in I found Bella brushing her teeth and grabbing a new change of pajamas. I watched her finish up in the sink and then waited patiently for her to strip down and into sleepwear.

She popped her tired eyes up to mine and blushed a little as she undressed. I didn't want her to feel self conscious so I went ahead and brushed up to. When I walked into the room again I found Bella sitting on the bed trying to take off her bra.

I made my way to her and helped her unclasp. When I did, I heard her sigh quietly and then watched as she rubbed her swollen breasts a little in relief. I tried to shake that image from my head because she was tired and I didn't want to get in the way of her sleep, but then she stood and removed her panties.

When she faced me, I can only assume my mouth was hanging open, because currently I was looking at the most exquisite creature I had ever laid eyes on.

Her belly had grown and there was a round subtle shape to it. She kept to her waxing appointments regularly still so her delicate lips were still bare. Then there were her luscious breasts...they had grown generously and held so much weight that I just wanted to bury my face in them.

I looked up to Bella and saw that she was blushing still and then I realized that she could have taken my gawking in a negative way. I didn't want her to be confused so I went to her slowly and caressed all the parts I had just described. When I was thoroughly enjoying my discoveries I heard her whimper a little and it drove me to the point of no return.

I helped her to the bed and laid her back gently. The covers were still askew so it was easy to pull them over us as I settled my self over her body and rediscovered both sets of her lips against my mouth.

~******~

I had the next three days off. Bella had an appointment today and we were going to find out the sex of our baby. I woke up and practically tripped from the excitement moving through my body. Her side of the bed was empty and I could hear the shower going. We were going to have brunch with my parents first and then head straight to her visit.

It was nine thirty now and we weren't set for brunch for another hour; I got up and went to the kitchen to make Bella something to hold her over. I toasted two English muffins and smothered them in strawberry jelly.

When I returned to the room, Bella was walking around in a towel and searching for something to wear. Currently, she had been wearing all her dresses because they didn't require any changes for her expanding belly. The rest of her was petite still and when she had them draped over her the fact that she was indeed pregnant was easy to tell.

"Love, lets go and get you some clothes today...it's time." I wrapped my arm around her and presented her with the two muffins on a plate. She grabbed it and took a bite while nodding in agreement and resting against my chest.

I came around to greet our little one and then nibbled on her neck a bit before getting in the shower myself.

*****

Brunch was uneventful, my mother and father catered to Bella and lavished her with attention. My mother kept telling her just how much she was glowing and looking wonderful. I agreed with all of it, but Bella being her unique self, didn't do well when given compliments. She was blushing the whole time and would hide her heated face behind my arms with a laugh.

My life was looking good, and I didn't think anything would knock it off course.

When we arrived at the doctor's office, Bella and I sat talking about what we thought the baby would be. I was sure it would be a girl and Bella was adamant that it was a boy. We whispered about names and colors for the nursery on either option throughout the wait.

When we went in, our disappointment was delivered to us in the form of a stubborn baby. The very nice young woman who was leading this event tried for over twenty minutes to get a glimpse of the gender of our baby, but unfortunately the little Cullen just didn't want to cooperate.

Bella was disappointed and to be honest so was I. We were both so anxious to know more about the life she was carrying and even more anxious to start planning his or her arrival properly. That included names, nurseries and clothes. Without the knowledge, we were walking through the dark without a light.

When we left there I called the family to share the news. Everyone just kind of huffed and then let us know that soon we would know and not to get down. I tried to focus on that and headed toward a maternity boutique with Bella.

The first one we arrived at was very chic. Bella didn't find a thing in there to wear and I couldn't blame her. It wasn't her taste, nor was it very attractive. It looked like a new age place so we departed and headed for the mall.

After parking and grabbing a snack, we made our way around the seas of people who were crowding the way ahead. I kept a firm grasp on Bella's waist and led her carefully to a store on the bottom floor.

We ended up at _Pea in The Pod. _I walked around with Bella and to my relief she was able to find a generous amount of clothing that she liked. After several different wardrobe changes and a little tiff over who would be purchasing said clothes, we made our way out and back through the crowds.

We stopped at the center fountain to catch a breather. Even though we had only been to one store, the size of this place was enormous and we had spent nearly an hour searching for clothes.

"Do you want something to snack on love?" I had a sweet tooth and I wanted to make sure Bella wasn't hungry.

She rested her head against my shoulder and laughed a little. I felt her body shaking in my arms while she nodded her head yes.

"I could go for something sweet..." she smiled up to me and in that one look I didn't think I would ever see another look as wonderful as the one she gave to me. With a last kiss to her cheek I stood to get her a cinnamon twist.

I was just about to step away, but I was stopped in my tracks by a pair of ice blue eyes standing in front of me. It was Tanya.

I felt my stomach turn. I had about a hundred different thoughts going around in my head, but the one jumping at me for attention was the fact that Bella was pregnant and that Tanya was insane. For all I knew she would purposely attack Bella with the intention of hurting our baby and the thought of that alone was enough to set me on edge.

I felt my body tense. I was ready for anything this _thing_ would do. I made peace quickly with the fact that I would have to throw her...and throw her hard if she attempted to come near Bella and I was just fine with that.

Tanya was trying to look over my shoulder and see Bella, but I just kept moving along with her. She wasn't worthy of setting her sight upon my love and our baby and I intended to see that through.

When she realized I was blocking her and had no intention of letting up she spoke.

"It all makes sense now..." she said. Her voice was smug and I could see her cocky grin spreading throughout her face.

"You knocked her up and now you're stuck with her." I opened my mouth to speak, but Tanya beat me to it.

"Poor Bastard...the kid I mean...having you two fuck ups as parents."

I stepped forward. For what, I still didn't know.

"It is yours, right? I mean can you even be sure? What kind of whore just goes after guys with relationships? For all you know it could be anyone's. Well...anyone who already had someone."

I was past my breaking point, when she opened her mouth to say more; I let her know exactly just how much I thought of her.

"SHUT UP!" she widened her eyes and her nostrils flared. I didn't think anything she could say would be worse than she already had, but I wasn't about to chance it.

"Don't you ever speak of my family again, do you understand me?" I was shaking at this point, I seethed the words to her in warning, but it wasn't enough. I wanted her to hurt...I wanted her to hurt like she had hurt Bella. She had degraded my unborn baby and the love for the woman I had carrying it.

"Your nothing but trash Tanya, that's all you've ever been. I took pity on your pathetic life. It's the only reason you were in mine to begin with. You were a convenience...a piece of ass at most. It's all a person like you will ever be. Don't try and fool yourself into thinking we had something more than that. I never loved you...hell, I hardly liked you, and now I hate you."

She was about to say something, but I smirked at her. I knew my words affected her and I hoped she was hurting. I meant every word I said and I didn't have any remorse in my body for her.

"Go take a long walk off a short pier, Tanya" and with that I turned back to Bella. She was sitting in her same spot and I could see her shaking a little. She was clearly angry and I wanted to get her out of here before Tanya could upset her more. The words she had said about Bella were cruel and the way she talked of our baby was worse.

I heard Tanya following behind us, speaking loudly for people around us to hear.

"Sure Edward, nice little show you put on for your pregnant whore. I don't give a shit if she is knocked up..._dogs get pregnant too!"_

I truly thought I would hit her...I didn't think I had the control to stop myself, but with a growing crowd and an anxious Bella, I held onto the last thread of control I had. I carried all the bags in one hand and wrapped Bella in the other.

Tanya kept her show going and I stepped up our speed. Bella looked up to me with angry tears and handed me her cell.

"Call the cops Edward...I don't think she'll stop this time if she comes after me."

I saw the frustration in her face and beyond that was fear...she feared for our baby and right now so did I.

I dialed 911 and let the operator know the situation. To our luck there were deputies' already on site and we were told to continue walking toward the exit and that an intervention would happen as soon as they could see her.

Just as we approached the doors and Bella was walking through, I saw Tanya lunge at her in an attempt to push her down. I panicked and threw myself in front of her and felt my body turn to stone. Next thing I knew, police were around us and Tanya was screaming on the floor, that I had hit her.


	26. Chapter 26

**Songs for this chapter :Trouble-Coldplay**

** Breakable- Ingrid Michaelson**

Lets get Tanya the B**ch gone...Im accepting ideas on how to do it ;) I hope you enjoy the chapter. Thanks Tina (rangernstephfan) your are a wonderful Beta!

* * *

**BPOV (Breakable)**

The high road is a lonely place to be. I know because currently I was sitting smack dab in the middle of that god forsaken highway alone.

I wanted to hit her, I wanted to yell and curse her just the way she had done me, but I couldn't. I was four months pregnant and the choice of doing that would only A) hurt my baby or B) make me stoop to her level.

I went against both, so I kept silent. I was shaking and my body was tense from the rage that filled me whole. Every time I heard her say something else my mind would go about one hundred miles an hour with insults that would rival and shame her.

Edward had finally called the cops; he kept a firm grip on me and led us to the exit in an attempt to get away from her. I pushed the handle forward to step outside and when I did, I felt something push me forward. It wasn't powerful or over bearing, but it did have enough strength to make me stumble.

I hit my head against the frame, but caught myself before I could fall. The next thing I knew, Tanya was on the floor screaming that Edward had hit her. I honestly wasn't sure if he had; to be honest the things she had been screaming were enough to drive me to the point of violence. I had never been a fighter or one for confrontation, but Edward was a different story. He was beyond protective of me and our unborn baby and there wasn't much he wouldn't do to protect us.

I saw one of the officer's approach us and then my heart stopped. I gripped Edward's hand out of reflex and clutched him to me instinctively. People who had been watching Tanya's scene were coming up to the officers while she was being cuffed and proclaimed Edwards's innocence.

Luckily, the two had seen the whole thing happen and didn't need their statements for proof. Tanya was kicking and flailing around in the officer's arms, all the while cursing me and Edward and it came to the point where they had to drop her to the ground and cuff her legs as well.

I heard them yelling to her warnings that she needed to act like a lady or they wouldn't treat her like one. I snorted at that line; she obviously wasn't concerned about her image.

Anger had resurfaced and began to flow through my body at an alarming rate and I felt myself becoming consumed with a rage that would rival _Sekhmet_ for dominance. Pieces of my control were slipping away one by one and then it happened. My limit had been met and nothing could sate my anger.

It happened when Edward had held me to him gently and whispered to the officer that I needed to go home. He said that it was too much and that I was too delicate to deal with this situation.

I pulled away from him and pushed him hard. "Are you talking about me?!" I spat out

Edward wore a scared and nervous expression while he nodded wearily. I looked over to the officer and spoke for myself about what I wanted.

"No, were going to go see a judge or a lawyer or who ever the hell we need to about getting that _God damn nut job_ out of our lives! This is the last _fucking_ time she will come and ruin a perfectly good day!"

I had no control, I was shaking again and Edward realized it so he wrapped me in his arms while agreeing to my words. I faintly heard them going on about where to go and what to do, but I didn't process any of it. The only thing going through my mind was finding a way to be rid of her once and for all.

A long while had passed us over while we stood there, but I wasn't in the mind set to know how long it actually was. I was growing more anxious by the second as we stood there like idiots with people gawking. I felt the frustration aching through my veins. I couldn't take just standing around and doing nothing productive towards getting Tanya out of our lives forever.

I finally snapped and yanked my arm away from Edward. I shoved my hand into his pocket looking for my keys, and when I found them, I made my way out of the mall.

I faintly heard Edward calling to me from behind, but I didn't even give myself a chance to register his words. I stepped in haste to find my vehicle and get the hell out of there as fast as possible. Finally, I found the familiar white SUV and unlocked the doors. I felt Edwards strong arms come around my center carefully and his head leaning against my back.

"Love, please...let me drive." I knew that I was in no condition to be behind the wheel, so I huffed and slammed the keys in his hand and made my way around to the passenger side wordlessly. When I reached my door it was already open and Edward was there holding out a hand for me to help me in.

He didn't speak when he came around the driver's side and got in. In fact, we sat there in complete silence for a long while before he even said a word to me.

"Bella..." He was shaking his head and not meeting my intense stare. I watched him search for words in silence, but didn't even try to sate his pain. This was partly his fault, and no matter how you try to spin it or make it sound, his lie had created this mess.

I was realistically angry though, I knew that I had contributed to this as well but It didn't make my anger lessen any and I didn't want it to, I wanted to stew in my anger and let it all out.

When it came to Edward and all his webs that were spun early on, I had let myself experience all the emotions...all except anger. Today, the anger came out for dominance and I ached to release it at any opportunity.

"Edward, just start the sixty thousand dollar vehicle you bought me and take us to the fucking police station."

I seethed the words and looked out the window.

He didn't hesitate a second longer and started up the ignition to drive us to our next location.

Tension consumed the vehicle, Edwards's frustration and my rage to be exact. He reached over to hold my hand in a soothing manner and I didn't pull away. I was angry, but his love for me was evident in even his touch and I couldn't bring myself to pull away from him. He was my lover, my partner, my friend...I was just angry, but not hateful. When I was calm enough to think clearly, I reminded myself of the things he said and did in defense of _our_ family. When those thoughts were firmly in place, I broke the silence.

"We're going to be there a while aren't we?" I said it calmly as a question. He rubbed soothing circles around my hand and nodded his head gently.

"I imagine so...would you like to stop somewhere for something, Love?" I could hear the uneasy tone in his voice and beyond that the nerves. Where his mind was I had no idea, I had been so engulfed in my own emotions that I had completely forgotten to ask.

"I think we should stop at home for a moment...I'd like to get into something more comfortable...my body hurts."

Suddenly, the car was being pulled to the shoulder and the hazard lights were on. Edward had turned his entire body to face me and I saw the panic in his face.

"Bella, oh god...what hurts love? Are you feeling sharp pains?" He was speaking in a rush and I didn't process it right away. His hands were over my belly and feeling around. When he was done with that assessment, he grabbed my wrist and checked my pulse.

I stilled his hands and grabbed his face. "I'm fine...I didn't mean it like that...I just mean that I want to change into something that actually fits me, without it being forced."

He closed his eyes and exhaled in relief. I was about to make another comment, but I was broken from that thought by the agony that crossed his face. His body was shaking and tears were streaming down his cheek bones. Suddenly, my anger was gone and concern quickly took its place.

I leaned over and grabbed him to me. I held his head to my chest and shushed him quietly.

"Bella, I'm so sorry this happened...I did the best I could to keep her away from you, I'm so sorry you had to hear all those horrible things love...it was all horrible and wrong baby. She was absolutely horrible."

He held me to him as strongly as I had embraced him. I knew that he did his best, and if he hadn't been protecting me the way he had, then I could have really been hurt..._we_ could have been hurt, the baby and I both. I dragged in a long shuddering breath as I pulled away from him. I sat with my head in my hands and concentrated on just relaxing a bit. The reality of what our lives had become came barreling down on me and it was giving me a migraine.

"Baby, let's just go home for a moment." I said quietly. Edward took a second to compose himself as well and then we were back on the road.

When we arrived home we made our way upstairs in silence. Edward had all five bags of clothes we had just bought in his hands when he met me in the room. I walked to the bed and began unloading the purchases. He helped me sift through them to find an outfit I would be comfortable in for hours. I didn't care that I hadn't washed them yet; comfort was the only thing on my mind. Outside of yoga pants and dresses which were currently more snug than loose, I had no other options.

I dressed in some jeans and plain white cami; I covered up with a long sleeve grey cardigan and made my way to the living room for Edward.

I found him sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. He looked so stressed and distraught; I walked up behind him and placed my hand on his shoulder. He popped his head up and turned to find me. When he saw me, his expression softened and he smiled slightly. I returned it as I watched him make his way to me, holding me at arms length.

"You look so pretty, Bella." He kissed my nose and admired me for a moment longer. He slowly kneeled on his knees and pulled up my top to drop tender kisses on my belly while repeating that I was pretty over and over. I didn't blush or hide; I took the compliment for what it was. More over, I felt pretty.

My new outfit wasn't extravagant, but it was cut fittingly to accentuate my subtle round belly nicely. I wanted to be seen for what I was, a woman, a successful, intelligent and educated woman who didn't resort to public debauchery and lies. I grabbed his hand and we made our way to the station.

I had taken the keys from him in the garage and Edward didn't fuss or even make a comment about it. I needed to be in control of this situation from here on, this was the only thing I could do in defense of myself today, and I wanted to make sure I took ownership of this situation.

I think he realized that and followed my lead blindly and with confidence.

Edward had called a friend while we were on our way there, and before we made our way to park, we had a lawyer. I appreciated it more than he knew, because we were able to make this process move faster than it would have taken if we were alone.

I was trying to be assertive, but with each minute that passed I could feel my body begin to tighten. I figured it was stress so tried my best to relax as much as possible under the circumstances.

Our time at the station was more than eventful. Between the statements we had made and the waiting game we played, our time in total was about four hours in all. Our Attorney, Victoria, made our lives a lot less stressful and comfortable though. She was intent on seeing to it that Tanya was not only charged and booked, but held without bail for the time being. The judge saw us on an emergency protection order and to my relief Tanya was ordered to a facility to treat her and also give her a mental screening.

If she were anybody else, I would think that it was extreme; however I had seen her in action way to many times to have any compassion for her. On top of her harassment and extreme behavior, there was the matter of lying to Edward for all those months about something so horrible.

We left there hand in hand, Edward and I, and even though I was relieved to be closing this chapter out, I couldn't let myself feel free yet, especially with the discomfort that was beginning to shoot through my body. It began to be more painful, and I couldn't deny my discomfort any longer, I turned to Edward as we got to our car and told him what I was feeling.

~******~

**EPOV (Trouble)**

I felt lighter than I had in almost a year. Bella was holding my hand and carrying our baby right now and for the foreseeable future we were, Tanya free. I held her tiny body to me as we walked to the car, but just as I had unlocked the doors, she turned to me with a somber expression.

"Edward....I'm not feeling well." Her eyes looked scared and her voice was pained. I stopped breathing as well as moving and stared in to her eyes. She placed her hands to her belly and rubbed small circles in an attempt to comfort herself.

My hands joined her immediately while my heart raced a mile a minute. "What's wrong baby? Are you in pain, hungry, tired?" I was hoping to everything, that she would just say she was hungry or tired, but when she confirmed my worst fear and said she felt pain, my heart fell to my feet.

"Baby, I think we need to get you to the hospital...I'm not taking any chances with either of you, love." Tears were welling in her eyes and she bit the corner of her lip while nodding. I tried to keep myself cool and collected while I helped her into the car, but I was too anxious and had actually gathered her whole body in my arms and sat her in myself.

I was attempting to buckle her in, but my hands were shaking and my heart was pounding so loud I could feel it reverberating through my body. I felt Bella's hands over my own and when I looked up to see her face, I saw that she was as worried as I was.

Our expressions resembled each others and the only thing I could think to calm us was to kiss her. I embraced her lips with a need and then dropped my lips to her abdomen. She had been through so much today...they both had been through so much and it terrified me that it may have been more than she could handle.

I had just pulled out of the station and made my way through traffic. I dialed my dad through my blue tooth while driving with my left hand and caressing Bella's stomach with my right.

After three rings and what felt like forever, my father answered.

"Dad, I need to ask you a favor." my voice was tight and my words were a reflection of my mood. I was scared.

My dad didn't hesitate to grant me my need without even hearing it yet. "What is it Edward? What can I do?"

I told him a brief run down of the events that had already unfolded and then of Bella's discomfort. He knew before I had even asked what needed to be done.

My father had more pull in that hospital than I did, and he wouldn't run into any problems getting Bella accommodated immediately and without question. He hung up with the promise of having her set up by the time we arrived and then threw in that he and my mother would see us both shortly.

I was appreciative toward his willingness to help, moreover his desire to be with us at this moment. I didn't know how to reassure Bella of anything that I didn't know about, but my mother being an eternal optimist and my father a medical genius, at least they would serve as the reassurance we would both need.

When we parked in the garage, I helped Bella out of the car and slowly walked with her to the doors. She had adamantly refused me getting her a wheel chair, so I compromised with setting the speed of our movement.

When we both walked in, I set straight for the admittance desk and was greeted by an older woman named Margie

As soon as I gave Bella's name and my title, we were ushered to a private room on the maternity ward. Bella lost the wheel chair battle with Margie and I wheeled her up gratefully that she was cooperating.

I helped my love into a gown and laid her down gently on her bed. She was calmer at this point, but still feeling cramps. I just held her hand and caressed our baby while I said silent prayers to make this all be okay. Fear was still thick over me, but I did my best to be optimistic.

I saw the door open and I kissed Bella's head before standing back a little to get out of the way.

Tonight Dr. Gershwire was on duty. He was an older man in his fifties; it was a calming thing to see him as opposed to someone my age. In this field you wanted somebody who had been around long enough to have seen it all, not a newbie trying to learn the ropes.

I greeted him and listened to him ask Bella standard questions regarding her pregnancy. When he got to the part of the pains shooting through her abdomen, I felt myself stiffen even more. She said it had started out gradually during the last few hours and then had escalated as we were leaving.

I felt the hate I had for Tanya multiplying with each second. Once again, she had caused Bella to hurt and not only my love, but my tiny helpless baby as well. I was sick all over again when I realized that I had already failed as a father, my entire purpose for being was to protect them both, and in the course of seven minutes, I had failed them.

Dr. Gershwire examined Bella thoroughly and then went to the sonogram machine. While he was preparing things to see our baby, I took the liberty of helping my love get prepared as well. I knew she was shy when it came to certain things, and more over I was a jealous bastard. I grabbed a sheet to cover her bare core and then lifted her gown over her swollen belly. I smiled gently when I looked down to her. She was to most beautiful woman I had ever seen, and the image of her beautiful skin and round belly was just adding to her appeal.

Dr. Gershwire approached us now and squirted a generous amount of jelly over Bella. He ran the wand over her and then watched the screen intently. I was holding my breath in anticipation and also praying in my head for our little angel to be okay. Bella gripped my hand tighter and her palms were sweaty, I leaned down and dropped a kiss to her lips and just as I was about to pull away, I heard the swooshing sound of our baby's heartbeat surrounding us.

I exhaled in relief over Bella's face, and then turned my body immediately to see our baby. There on the screen, was the tiny life my love was carrying for us, and I felt my heart swell with even more love all over again.

"She seems to be doing just fine in there, her heartbeat is strong and sturdy, but I'm going to take some more pictures and tests to find out exactly whats causing you discomfort Bella."

My mouth was gaping open and my eyes were wide. I looked to Bella and saw her eyes wide with excitement as well. I turned quickly back to the doctor and then laughed a little in shock.

He looked up to meet my eyes, and then had looked at me with confusion. I needed to know if he had said what I thought he did.

"Did you say _she_?" He raised an eye brow and then looked almost apologetic towards our faces.

"I sure hope I didn't ruin anything for you two...but yes...it's a she"

I felt emotion in my throat almost choking me. We were having a little girl, a precious little replica of Bella...I was imagining what she would look like, she was already the most loved and cherished thing in our world, and I couldn't wait to meet her. I leaned down to Bella and kissed her beautiful, full lips. Her eyes were soft and her face was peaceful, she looked angelic in this moment and it made my heart ache with need for her.

She met my gaze and a smile spread through her face and lit up her eyes. She raised her hand that held my ring on her finger and then caressed me with her words.

"_She's_ going to be okay baby...our little girl is okay." I let tears fall from my eyes as I looked at her, those words were exactly what I needed to hear, and I didn't care about anything other than the two most important girls in my life.

The only thing that mattered in that moment anymore was that Bella and our daughter were okay.

~***********~

My mother and father arrived shortly after Dr. Gershwire had begun taking blood. Bella didn't complain once about any of the tests they needed to perform. She knew it was all for our daughter and I knew that she would always do anything for her as well.

Mom and Dad showered Bella with attention. When we told them of the baby's sex, both clapped and hugged us both. My mother held onto Bella as if she were porcelain and waited on her hand and foot. My mother fluffed pillows and massaged her legs, while I sat by her side and dropped kisses to her lovely face.

Bella was embarrassed by the amount of attention she was getting, but was still on cloud nine from hearing of the baby's health and sex that she let it be without complaint. I was grateful for this small window we all got to pamper her ourselves, instead of having to send her to the spa for someone else to do.

Dad was circulating the hospital and consulting with Dr. Gershwire regarding Bella. He was already an overbearing grandpa and I was more than fine with that. Had it been me doing the stalking, I'm sure I would have been kicked out by now, but seeing as it was my dad; it was overlooked and treated with care on all aspects.

Sometime around midnight Bella was given thumbs up regarding her and the baby. She had been experiencing the cramps from an overwhelming amount of stress and her blood pressure was at a dangerous high as well. Those two combined, had put her in a very bad place.

We had waited out the night to make sure that Bella was okay, and thankfully she was. The doctor gave us approval to go home then, but it came with some very strict rules for us to keep to. Dr. Gershwire gave her instructions to rest and relax, and I listened intently to all he said about her and what she needed to abide by for release.

Dad, Mom and I all shared a concerned glance as the good doctor explained to Bella that she needed to keep away from anything she encountered today that had caused her to get here.

I was on edge again, as I realized that I would need to be more than over protective until Tanya was given a sentence. For now, Bella was away from anybody that would purposely hurt her and would be that way for at least two weeks.

My parents stepped out of the room, while I helped Bella into her clothes again. I felt more at ease with her now that we knew she was alright. I lingered on her hips for a moment, while I helped her into her panties. She gave me a mischievous grin and bit her lip when I ran my fingers over the top of the lace. I groaned at the sight of her gorgeous form and then continued to dress her slowly.

After an absurd amount of teasing and a straining erection in my pants, I kissed her with passion and then peeled myself away from her as we made our way home.

When we had finally made it home at the wee hours of the morning, I lay in Bed bare skinned with Bella. She had fallen asleep almost upon resting her head to the pillow. I couldn't bring myself to let her go even a little, so I held her to me as if she were an appendage of my own.

I was lost in thoughts of the prior day, and all the ways I could have done better, I was disappointed in myself still and the guilt for what Bella had been enduring was eating me alive. I saw the sky begin to change colors, and I was grateful that I still had two more days off. I snuggled closer to her form and let myself drift to sleep with my hands resting peacefully over our baby and my face nestled in her long mahogany hair.

Just as sleep was about to claim me, a faint little kick met my hands and it pulled me wide awake.


	27. Chapter 27

Thank you Tina! Everyone should know that this chapter came from the mind of rangernstephfan,she helped me get through a serious writers block! Again I dont own em, I just like to imagine Edward hovering over me ;) ENjoy!

* * *

**Esme POV (New Soul)**

It was three thirty in the morning. Carlisle and I were on the road and approaching home. When we had left earlier to the hospital to be with Edward and Bella, we had no idea what to expect when we'd arrived.

Carlisle only told me a brief explanation as he was dialing the hospital after he had hung up with Edward, and from what I could see from his expression and tone in his voice, I knew that he was just as blind as I. All we knew was that Bella was cramping and that she was in some sort of distress from the day's earlier events. I had no clue what they were, but I was mentally ready to shake Edward and knock some sense in him if he had been the one to upset her.

I saw Carlisle flip into Doctor mode so I didn't try to interrupt him. Bella's health and our grand baby were far more important than my need for more answers right now. I grabbed some shoes and my purse from the hall and guided Carlisle with me to the car.

I had driven while he spoke to several people in regards to Bella. My body was becoming more tense by the second as I heard second hand information that he was giving to the physicians. He made sure Bella had the best doctor available to see her when she arrived and had arranged for a private room in the recovery suites.

When we arrived, I dropped Carlisle at the ER entrance so he could get a head start on Bella and Edwards needs. I parked in his reserved spot and then headed straight for the maternity ward. My heart was beating erratically and the only sound I could hear as I made my way down that corridor was the sound of my heel slapping against the concrete.

I didn't know what I could do for them outside of give hugs, love and support, but whatever they needed I would find a way to give them. I had just came to the nurses station and was about to request information for Isabella but then I saw Carlisle with a hard expression in the hall way. My heart felt as if it stopped and my eyes went wide with fear.

I walked straight to him and in my most collected tone I could muster, asked what was happening. I braced myself for the worst while I prayed for the best. He brought his eyes up to me and I saw his eyes were angry and his jaw was set.

"That woman has gone too far Esme. I won't have this. I won't tolerate this harassment a second longer."

I was confused. Carlisle adored Bella so it couldn't be her he was upset with. I racked my brain for a moment and then it clicked. I felt my warmth exit and my fists clench. I took in a breath and then asked the question I needed answered.

"Tanya?" just saying her name was raising the blood in my body. Carlisle nodded once and then grabbed my hand to tell me the rest.

"They ran into her at the mall today, she harassed Bella again and this time it was worse."

I gasped as the scene unfolded in my head. If it was worse than last time, then our worry and anger were justified. She had attacked Bella ruthlessly months ago and it had left us all shaken. I couldn't begin to imagine what she had done to her this time around.

I was sick to my stomach at the thought of Bella being harmed at all, yet alone four months pregnant. I focused my energy and trying to maintain some sort of composure as Carlislecontinued.

"Tanya pushed Bella into a door and accused Edward of assaulting her in revenge. Luckily the cops saw it all happen and arrested her. The kids got a lawyer and now she's been baker acted, but Bella has been cramping for some time now and they are doing what they can for her and the baby. We don't know much else at this point, but Barry is in there now. He's got her and the baby on a fetal monitor and he's finishing up some blood tests as we speak."

My heart ached for Bella. She had endured more heart ache in the time she had met us all than most people should have to face in a decade. I wanted to care for her and protect her from all these shenanigans. She was the love of Edwards's life and the mother to our first grandchild. We loved her as much as Alice and Edward, and the need to protect her was just as prominent.

We didn't say anything else as we waited in the hall for the door to open. Carlisle's nerves never calmed and his anger only seemed to burn more. I used the time we had to wait, to find a way of ridding Tanya for good. I knew people...I was a good person and an outstanding citizen, but I knew people. I didn't want to kill her, well...not literally, but I did want her presence to be an absence from our lives.

Before I could get too wrapped up in my grand plans, I needed to call Alice. She needed to know of the events unfolding around us. When she had answered, she was weary. She knew something was wrong before I even got my hello out. I told her what her dad had just told me, but discouraged her from coming down until we knew for certain what was going on. In the chance that Bella might lose the baby, I wanted it to be as private for them as we could accommodate.

Granted I knew smaller guest sizes and fewer faces would never be enough to heal the loss of a child. I knew all too well. Alice finally relented only with my promise to keep her informed of everything that developed. Just as I had hung up, the door opened and we made our way in.

When we entered the room, our eyes settled onto the most beautiful sight. Edward was huddled over Bella's bed and his eyes shined brightly as he rubbed her round tummy and kissed her face. Bella's expression was a mirror of Edwards and my heart relaxed. I felt Carlisle squeezing my hand in relief as well at the image before us.

We announced our visit and were greeted with the news of our _grandaughter's _latest developments. I think I actually squealed at the words and jumped in to grandma mode. I was channeling Alice in my reaction and Carlisle shared my enthusiasm. I loved the idea of being a grandma, some women hated the thought, but I welcomed it. I loved my children to the fullest and ached to share the joy.

My anger was on a back burner for now, and I focused all my attention on caring for Bella. That sweet girl was always feeling as if she were a bother to any of us if we tried to do anything for her. However right now she seemed to be content and in relief of the baby's well being, so I took advantage of it and pampered her to my hearts content.

She was falling in and out of sleep and Edward took that time to get us caught up on the actual events that had managed to end her up here in this bed.

With a pained expression and a heavy heart Edward shared with us the details of their misery.

When he repeated all the hateful and disgusting things that Tanya had said about our Bella I almost choked.

I made a decision right then and there that I would see to it personally that Tanya was gone once and for all. Normally I don't meddle, and I don't condone dropping your nose where it doesn't belong, but this had gone too far. It had gone too far long before this day, and now I needed to set it right. Now this did concern me...it concerned all of us.

I would see to it that Bella and Edward would not be bothered a second longer by her. Bella especially...poor dear was ready to crack from all the stress that animal had brought upon her and it was affecting that sweet baby she was carrying.

It angered me to no end that she would carry this horrible event with her forever. Women recall their pregnancies and for the most part we all have instances where we would rather forget than remember, but unfortunately that's not a luxury we all get to have. Bella's nine months would now me marred by this event, I was sure of it.

That thought was my driving force for seeing to all her needs that night. I was going to make sure that her memories from here on out would be filled with happiness and excitement. I was preparing myself to speak with Edward regarding this as well, I knew he was doing all in his power, but I knew he could do more. I didn't care what it cost us or how we did it, but peace was going to become her reality from that moment forward.

Carlisle and I stayed with them both until Barry said Bella was able to go home. Nothing could have pried me from that room and Carlisle seemed to be just as content on being there as well. He had spent his part of the night following Barry and consulting with him on various different result findings that would come through.

I was worried briefly that Edward would be upset with us for staying so long and meddling, but just as I was about to hint around our wanting to stay, he came to me and wrapped me in a bear hug.

"Thanks for being here mom. I appreciate it more than you know...we both do." He tore his eyes away from Bella just momentarily to give me a thankful smile and then kissed my cheek before going back to her side.

I watched him with pride as he doted on her lovingly. He was always touching their baby and whispering his love. I sat as a silent observer of his devotion to her and drank in the love that had filled this small room.

_That _was the son I had raised, _that_ was the man Carlisle had taught, and _that_ is what Bella deserved to have for the rest of her life. Anything less he offered her would be undeserving of something as wonderful as her. He saw that now and to my joy; embraced it with open arms.

When Bella was able to leave, we all went together. I knew Edward had to go back to work soon and that thought left me uneasy about Bella being alone. With what she had just been through, I didn't like the idea of her being by herself for such extended periods if time. I realized I had a couple of days to iron it out, so I dropped it for now.

Carlisle and I spoke a little about our concerns regarding Tanya on the ride home and then put it on a shelf until the morning. He knew that I had something planned or at least an idea forming, but he never tried to discourage me in the least.

While I was lying in bed waiting on Carlisle to join me, I let myself begin to search for Tanya's exit plan. I just needed to find something that she wouldn't be able to turn down or avoid, and then I would use it as leverage against her. I wasn't above blackmail and at this point paying her off seemed like an option as well. I was frustrated even more as I lay there with absolutely no idea of what to do.

I felt the bed shift and then Carlisle's arms around me. He took a relaxing breath and brought his lips to my ears." My love...I promise that we'll do whatever we need to make this go away. Don't lose any sleep over this tonight. We'll tackle it _together_ head on when we wake up."

He held me closer and kissed me good night as lay firmly against his side. My husband was truly the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me and I fell to a dreamless sleep with him right beside me.

~********************~

When I woke up later that morning it was to a very light colored sky. I glanced over to the alarm clock and saw that it was only 6:10. I had gotten maybe two and a half hours sleep and to my surprise I was wide awake.

I quietly got out of bed and made my way down stairs to let Carlisle sleep. I prepared some coffee with my French press and then settled at the kitchen table with my laptop.

I took that first sip of my heavenly nectar and then typed in an address to a private investigator.

*********************

By the time Carlisle had risen from bed, I was showered, dressed and happy. I had been making calls and gathering information all morning long with the help of Garette. I sat at the table going over my findings and sorting through what was usable. I still had at least a week to get what I needed, but from the looks of the items in front of me, there was a strong possibility that I wouldn't need it.

Tanya was quite possibly the worst kind of person I had ever encountered. She had enemies _everywhere, _and not the kind of enemies you get when you're among a few bad apples, but the kind of enemies you seek out, befriend and then take for all they have.

I simply had googled her name after I hired a P.I; I just wanted to see what I might be able to find myself. When her name was in the search box and I hit search, the treasure hunt had began.

Several people with facebook, myspace and all had things to say about the woman terrorizing my son and daughter...well, soon to be daughter anyway.

I read through several different pages that had come up in the search. Most were private, but some I could see. There were pictures and posts from what looked like Tanya, as a brunette. She had dyed her hair and wore much less tasteful attire than she had grown accustomed to these days.

I noted some of the dates on these posted pictures and saw that they weren't more than a few months ago. Interestingly enough, I was able to see a section where it looked as if she was composing and replying to a friend regarding the change. In the final reply to _Cathy, _which was on why she changed her hair, Tanya replied with, "_I'm just finding out that brunettes are getting all the action. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about...no worries, it's just a wig!"_

I didn't read too much into it, so I went on with the hunt. Carlisle sat next to me with his coffee and looked through the piles I had already composed. While he looked everything over, I filled him in on what I had started.

"I called a private investigator this morning. She's digging up everything on Tanya she can find. I'm doing the same."

I just kept going through the Google search while speaking to him, and he quietly nodded along.

"With a temper like hers, it shouldn't take us too long to get what we need on her. I can only imagine the horror stories out there."

Carlisle just nodded again and then placed his mug on the table. He grabbed my hand with urgency to get my attention and it worked.

"_What if it's simpler than all this?" _He waved a hand over the table and smiled. I didn't get what he meant and it was written all over my face.

"We should call the station and see about getting our hands on her record...you know, just to see."

My mouth fell open and I shook my head in disbelief. He was right, she had to have something legal pending or on the records. She was a hot head and that had to work in our favor.

I sat up quickly and ran upstairs to get changed.

*************************

Carlisle was a busy man while I changed. He had already called Isaac at the county attorney's office and had the ball rolling in motion before we had even gotten in the car.

When we arrived to the office, Isaac was waiting for us at the front. He had his brief case with him as he slipped into the backseat of our car.

"Isaac, thank you for helping us on such short notice...I really do appreciate your assistance with this."

He waved his hand dismissively to me and handed me the file.

"I think you'll find more than some interesting stuff in there...it should be enough to get anyone off your back that isn't wanted." His eyebrows were raised and his smile was amused.

Carlisle and I anxiously wafted through the file and gasped along with the pages.

In there were various different charges. Some were minor, but one stood out more than the others.

Tanya was involved in a situation regarding drugs. It shows that she was able to do probation, but she had to give information regarding somebody who was more sought after. Carlisleand I both stopped reading at that point and glanced at each other. He obviously had seen the same thing I had and I had a feeling it just might be enough.

The case was sealed and off her permanent record, if this were to get out, it would ruin her image. She may not have been too concerned with her personal one, but from the way she spoke at dinner that night many months ago, her professional one was all she had.

"Find something you like?" Isaac asked. I turned with a smile and nodded yes to him. He grabbed the file from me and grinned back. I pulled my checkbook from my purse and began writing out a blank form for him.

"Mrs. Cullen...no." I stopped and turned to him confused. I had never been in need of anything like this before, so I assumed that this was how it worked. He furrowed his brow in frustration and grabbed my hand.

"Mrs. Cullen...you both have no debt to pay here. I only wish I was able to do more for you than run some copies of paper."

Isaac was one of the first young men to benefit from a scholarship fund that Carlisle and I had founded for a local high school. He worked very hard all four years and came from a less than noble home. He was alone when we found him, and god only knows what would have happened to him if he hadn't left when he did. We paid for four years at Harvard and then an additional few at Harvard Law.

Before I could speak, he was out of the car and running up the stairs. When he reached the doors, he turned and held a finger to us, signaling for us to wait a moment.

When he returned he had a manila envelope under his arm and slipped it through the window.

"If this doesn't get you what you need...please call me. I'll help you any way I can..."

I kissed his cheek and Carlisle gave a small smile and nodded. We left there with a renewed sense of hope that we could give Bella and Edward a small part of the peace they were in desperate need of. Carlisle headed toward the treatment facility that Tanya was currently being treated.

We both sat in the light gray room in silence. I felt my nerves on edge as we waited for an attendant to bring her in to see us.

Carlisle seemed to be very calm and collected, but I couldn't seem to get there. I knew what was riding on this and it was the only thing that consumed my brain. Every second we sat in there, I could only picture Bella laying in that bed with tubes and wires hooked into her arms and belly. That precious baby she was carrying was more than likely emotionally, exhausted as Bella. I wanted to make this go away for her...it was the least we could do.

I hear the door being opened, but refused to turn and see if it was her. I didn't have to wait long, because soon she was seated directly in front of us in a simple yellow scrub attire. Her hair was knotted and her face was tired. She didn't look like she cared about a whole lot as we stared across the table at her.

There were two attendants behind her at Carlisle's request. It was silent for a long moment and then she spoke.

"I know why your here..." She kept her eyes on the table and wouldn't look up again. I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn't find a coherent sentence in my brain. She looked so lost, like she had no idea where she was. I tried to keep my emotions in check by remembering how Bella looked in that bed earlier this morning. It helped, but didn't change the fact that the sight before me was just sad.

Tanya's eyes looked like a little girls trapped in a woman's body. I found myself understanding Edwards need to comfort her. As much as I loathed her, I couldn't help but pity her. I turned my glance to Carlisle and saw his face was hard. Apparently, he wasn't as moved by the sight as I was and it was obvious as I stared into his face longer.

Carlisle was the first to start the talk we came to have.

"What do you want?" He said it low and angry toward her. There was no trace of the man I knew and loved in the tone he had used.

Tanya cocked an eyebrow, but kept her eyes trained on the table. My gaze was firmly set on Carlisle again as I waited for a response. I was a bit confused by his question seeing as we were the ones to seek her out, but then she spoke again.

"Well...that depends Mr. Cullen...what do you want from me?"

I snapped my eyes back to Tanya, her face was covered in a wicked grin and her eyes looked intense. The game was obviously back on and I felt like an idiot for dropping my guard. I was all of a sudden, grateful for Carlisle's demand to join me here today.

He didn't waste time getting to the point.

"We want you gone...forever. _I _want you to leave and never come back...to never come near Edward or Bella again...that includes the baby as well. "

He was smart; He left no loop holes for her to cross and covered his bases thoroughly. My mouth was still shut, as I watched this play out in front of me.

Tanya was grinning again and shaking her head from side to side. She took a deep breath and when she went to speak again, her eyes were glossy.

"You weep for _Bella and Edward, _and you have no idea what or why I am the way I am. Your son did this to me...He made me this way!" She yelled at the end.

I took a deep breath and interrupted.

"No, Tanya..._you _did this. You alone. You lied to him, you tricked him into thinking you were being beaten. This is the work of yourself backfiring in your face."

I saw her eyes tighten and her face twist in revolt. Her lips trembled for a moment before she composed herself and continued.

"He promised me...he promised to take care of me no matter what..." Her eyes spilled tears and her face was in pain. I did my best to stay emotionless and glanced to Carlisle. His face had never changed and he seemed to be bored. The expression never faltered even when he looked to Tanya and spoke again.

"How much?"

I had no idea what he was getting at, she hadn't asked for anything yet, but here he was offering her something.

"Depends..."she said smugly.

Carlisle grabbed the checkbook from his jacket pocket and thought for a moment. He took a deep breath and then put it back where he had retrieved it.

He smiled to her and then reached in my purse to her file. With a satisfied grin he slammed it open on the table.

"How about we keep our mouths shut in exchange for your absence?"

She scrunched her face up in confusion and grabbed the file. We watched as her face contorted into shock then comprehension.

We both sat back and smiled at her fear.


	28. Chapter 28

Songs for this chapter: Alexi Murdoch- All of My Days

Brian Adams- Please forgive me

Radiohead- Reckoner

THANK TINA! You are amazing and beyond helpful with this story and these characters...I would be on chapter 10 still if it werent for you ;)

Sorry this chap took a while, but I was trying to get it right. Okay with that said, the story is winding down and we'll be at around maybe five chaps left...It will end with the birth of the baby and then a preface for three years later. I'm toying with a follow up story that will focus on their lives after the initial attraction and fun has settled. Let me know if its something you'd like to read or if your just happy with this one ending. Enjoy!

~CC

disclaimer: Things I own are a civic, a blackberry and an ipod nano...NOT these characters or the twilight phenomenon

* * *

**EPOV (All Of My Days)**

I was making my way around the kitchen as quietly as possible. I wanted to make Bella some breakfast before she woke up, so I gathered ingredients for French toast and bacon. I was deep in concentration of the task at hand and didn't hear her walk in behind me.

I had just soaked two slices of bread in the batter and placed them on the griddle when I felt a tight bump against my back and soft arms snaking around my middle. I smiled wide as I felt Bella caressing her cheek against my back and leaning her weight on me.

"Good morning, baby"

She whispered into me. I took a deep breath and caressed her fingers that were around my center as I answered with the same greeting.

"This smells so good, Edward...would you make a few slices for me too?" She was serious; she truly thought that I was making myself breakfast and that she had to ask me to prepare some for her as well. I rolled my eyes as I flipped the bread on the griddle and then turned around to face her.

"Bella...don't you know by now that everything I do, I do for you? This _is_ your breakfast...not mine, love." I kissed her nose and caressed her cheek before returning to our previous position. She laughed gently against me and kissed along my back with wet lips. I groaned at the sensation it evoked in me but didn't try to act on it. I needed to feed her first and then I would have her for breakfast.

While asking her to sit down, I began arranging the slices of French toast and bacon on a plate for her. I was just about to playfully tease her to get a move on, but stood stock still as I felt a flutter against my back. I stopped and turned as fast as I could with out startling Bella so I could face her. Her eyes were wide and a small smile was on her lips as she held her hands over her belly in different spots.

I knelt down and placed my hands over hers and kissed her stomach softly. "Good morning my little darling. Daddy just finished your breakfast, so there's no need to get fussy." I kissed her once more and then stood to kiss Bella.

She had been asleep when I first felt the baby kick and I couldn't bring myself to awake her after the day she had just had. I had planned on telling her as soon as we sat down to eat, but our little Cullenista was just not going to be ignored.

I met Bella's eyes and saw the wonder filling them whole. She stood shocked for a moment, processing everything that just happened. It was so cute to see her at a loss for words, so I started the topic off with the news of earlier this morning's little kick.

"She kicked while you were asleep love, I was holding you and felt her very prominent move against my hand." Bella's eyes never left her belly as I told her the news. She had a full smile on her lips now and her hands on the roundness. My hands joined hers again and as we both looked down, we saw her shirt flutter under the kick of our baby once more.

We both stood in that position with wonder on our faces until her stomach growled and I made her sit to eat.

We both laughed as we watched intently on the scenes unraveling before our own eyes. We sat at the dining room table together side by side eating and laughing as our little wonder kicked and moved actively throughout breakfast. I was so thankful that I was able to share this moment with Bella. Her round belly and glowing skin were more than enough visual confirmation of our baby, but feeling her move around and kick was something different all together. It was real, it was all real and I couldn't be happier than I was at this moment in my life. Those kicks were coming from a life that we had created together.

I ate with one hand as the other was currently draped over Bella's shoulder keeping her pressed close to my side. It was the only way I wanted to live anymore, even simply eating breakfast I wanted her as close to me as humanly possible.

~**********~

We lounged around at home for a long part of the morning. Bella worked on some stories with her feet propped up on my lap, while I read the paper and caught up on her latest bylines. It hit me as I rubbed at her toes how nice this was. I had never felt so complete by doing absolutely nothing.

I wanted to spend the rest of my life feeling this way, and the only way I could do it was to have Bella by my side. Just as quickly as that thought filled my head, so did others. I had caused her a lot of pain in the time I had known her, and it tore at my heart to think that if she hadn't gotten pregnant we might not have ever gotten here.

It felt like a second chance of sorts and the fact that she had just suffered again, yesterday, made me realize how nervous the thought of her not wanting me was making me feel. I needed her. Truly needed her, not in the way you need to follow through on a commitment, but the way you need air, food or water. I couldn't be without Bella...ever. I didn't want to find out if I could either.

She popped her head up and smiled at me questioningly. I had no words to convey the depth of love I had for her, so I settled for crawling up her body and kissing her lips with need. She embraced me full on and then separated us momentarily to look me in the eyes.

"Are you okay, Edward? You seem distracted today." I was…but in a good way. Thoughts of Bella and our baby were consuming my mind and making my heart swell. She was perfection to me and the thought that she might leave me someday brought fear into my heart like never before.

I smiled to her as reassuringly as possible, before I told her what was eating at me.

"It's just that...well; you're everything to me Bella. You and our baby, your both all I have, all I want." I kissed her again in hopes she could feel my love for her more tangible. She held me to her and kissed me softly for a long while as I lay beside her completely enamored.

We hadn't talked about yesterday's incident yet and it was something I was hoping to put off until a later date when things were settled. Not because I was cowering, but because I felt it was what was best for Bella. But that thought sent me back to the last incident with Tanya and the way Bella had responded when I tried to make a decision for her. She hated it and felt like I was degrading her ability to make choices. Either way, I wanted her to know the depth of my sorrow for what she had endured.

"I'm so sorry Bella...I'll never be able to make this up to you, but I promise you, I won't ever stop trying."

She was quiet for a long moment and it made me nervous. I just held onto her and kissed her head repeatedly as assurance to her that she was loved.

"I know, Edward." She sighed heavily and laid her head back without continuing on. I decided to be a man and face this.

"Talk to me Bella. Please tell me what your feeling...how your feeling about all of this."

Her eyes were closed while she nodded her head yes. I gulped down a nervous breath and sat back in the sofa the way I had been earlier. I replaced Bella's feet on my lap and lovingly massaged her in an effort to help her relax.

I continued on this way for about a minute before she started speaking.

"Well I guess I'm not really sure what to think." She started. I just nodded to her and continued with my ministrations to her feet.

"I hate that this is our story Edward. No matter what, I'm the girl that caused you to break up with someone...I'm the other woman." I began to interrupt her, but she held up her hand to silence me and continued.

"I am, Edward. No matter how you say it or justify it in your head, when Tanya says the things she does about me, I can't deny it. I took you...I took you from her and the life she existed in."

Bella said all of this with acceptance. She wasn't sad or angry; she seemed to have come to terms with what she believed was the truth. I just continued to watch her in silence, all the while trying to find a way to explain to her what was indeed the reality of our situation.

"I deserve her anger, Edward, we both do. It doesn't make what she did yesterday or the times before excusable, but I do know that her anger at the very least is hers to have and rightfully so."

She finished and kept her eyes on me. I saw no reservations and noted how once again, she was fully composed. When I was sure she had finished I grabbed her feet and gently slid them off my lap and onto the couch as I brought my body to the floor beside her. I kissed her ankles and then scooted up to rest my head beside her belly.

She ran her hands slowly through my hair and over my cheek while our eye contact never faltered. I was still piecing together in my head, what I wanted her to understand and as soon as I was ready I began speaking.

"I made real mess of things Bella...me, not you. First, I want you to know that you didn't take me away from her...I was never hers to begin with. I removed her from what limited access she had in my life long before you came along, I just wasn't man enough to be upfront with her about it. I even convinced myself that I was sparing her feelings and doing a noble thing, when really all I was doing was being a coward."

I grabbed her hand and ran my thumb gently over her fingers then continued.

"As for you being "The other woman", let me assure you that you are no such thing...you're the _only_ woman. You are the only one Bella...just you. It was always you; I just hadn't met you yet."

I sat up and placed a kiss to our baby and then to her lips. She just stared back at me adoringly, while I professed my love in silence while kissing her body in random places. When I covered what was in reach, I sat back to my position and started again.

"Now for her anger, maybe it is justified. But if it is Bella, then it's justified toward me. You have never wronged Tanya. You were the selfless one that night at dinner and you are the one who spared her humiliation. So, I don't ever want to hear you say that you deserve to be talked to or spoken of in that manner ever again. Because it's wrong, love. You're far too good a person for such atrocious things to be said about."

She just gently nodded her head and then curled her body forward on the couch to face mine. I kissed her nose and then her lips before standing and getting behind her and curling my body around hers. We lay that way in silence a long while and eventually I felt her breathing even out and her body relaxed fully. She had fallen asleep and I followed right after her.

~************************~

**CPOV**

I sat across from Tanya feeling the first bit of contentment all day long. She was done and she knew it. I knew it.

I just waited for her to say something in regards to the large Manila folder laying open in her hands, but all she ended up doing was shaking. She met my eyes finally and the fear I saw in hers made me smile. I was happy...truly happy and I saw no reason to hide it.

I could feel Esme's eyes on me and then her reaching out for my hand in assurance. I latched onto her and clasped our fingers to show a united front. Tanya saw early on that Esme was a person with great humanity and had turned on her school yard charm in attempts to get us to back off. I didn't buy it and I was hardly impressed.

I had seriously considered paying her to make her go away, but decided I would rather use that vast amount of money spoiling my granddaughter. So, I went ahead and played my full hand and now it was time to call.

I peeked with my eyes down and saw that she was looking at the part of her file that had caught mine and Esme's attention as well. She was let off the hook for a serious drug charge in exchange of the person police were far more interested in for other crimes. Tanya had ratted and sent a man into the system for her freedom, but it was also noted that she would need to remain anonymous. That would have been hard to do with these copies floating into the wrong hands and I wasn't above the threat. The follow through maybe, but not the threat.

I saw the defeat creep into her eyes as she studied the sheets over and over again, but kept silent. I was going to wait for her to come forth with her epiphany and until then I could sit back and watch her squirm.

"Do you realize what this could do to me!?" She seethed. It was the first she had spoken since I had showed her the file and it made me almost laugh in amusement at her tone. As if I cared about what happened to her after the hell she had been subjecting Bella to.

"I'm quite certain I know what it would mean for you professionally...as well as personally. Maybe this is a good time to go over what it is we want from you in exchange for our silence."

Her face was twisting in disgust at the thought of having to concede, but she made no move to fight back this time. I smiled wider at her position of discomfort and then proceeded.

"Go away, Tanya. I don't care where to or how you get there, but when you do...don't ever come back. If we never see or hear from you again it will be too soon. There will be no phone calls, no letters, no name dropping or even hospital visits. If you're run over by a car someday and they bring you to my hospital or any hospital my son is at, then I will still hold you accountable. I suggest you make your way back to whatever hole you crawled out of and find yourself a real comfortable home in it."

Tears were leaking down her face and I couldn't have cared less. I had seen far too much pain in Bella and Edwards's eyes long enough to feel numb to the creature before me. She wasn't a woman, my wife was and to put Tanya in the same category as her was far too lengthy a reach for me to even attempt.

She slammed her hand on the desk and screeched in frustration. I didn't acknowledge it and neither did Esme. I waited for her to finish her little rift and then continued on.

"As for the baby, you will not speak, think or breathe in her direction. I know you run in the same social circles as Edward and probably even share a friend or two that are the same, but you will not make inquiries on any of the people whose last name is Cullen or whose first name is Isabella. Do you understand?"

Her body was shaking with fury as her leg bounced up and down in irritation over and over again. She simply nodded and then turned her notorious glare in my direction.

"I hate you!" She seethed in a low gravely tone. I just simply nodded and smiled wider. I replied with the only response I could think suitable.

"Good...I'm doing my job well then."

Esme sat as still as a statue next to me. She was barely breathing in full rasps and I could only assume it was from the shock of this all. I knew she would of accomplished the same outcome had I let her do the talking, however she had an eternal mothering about her and we would have been here longer than necessary, before she could have gotten past Tanya's tricks and games.

"So do we have a deal then? Are you going to abide by these wishes or do I need to make a trip out to Joliet to let this, Laurent, know why he's currently serving time?"

She seemed to be going through an internal struggle in her head, but soon she stood and then looked me square in the eye. "Yes. It's a deal...just...keep this quiet. Please."

I sat still and raised my eyebrows in thought for a moment before smiling again and nodding. Tanya made to leave the room and was met by a female aid at the door to lead her out. The two male attendants were making there way to leave as well now, but I stopped them and waited for the door to shut.

"Now, I can only imagine the wheels turning in your heads right now, so to keep you from trouble with what I can only tell you is a given, here..."

I handed them each, a couple hundred dollars and then watched them leave. With surprised, satisfied smiles on their faces.

I turned to Esme and saw the relief filtering across her face. She stared at me with wide eyes and then grabbed my hands to stand and hugged me. I just held her tightly and kissed her cheek.

"It's over sweetheart...it's over" She nodded her head and rested it against my chest before lifting it and saying, "We need to tell them...come on."

~**********~

**EPOV**

I was still wrapped up in the state of awareness, but asleep. I had Bella wrapped securely against my chest and was in complete peace. I was lost though when I felt a warm and soft rub against my cock. I heard myself groan and it awoke me fully.

When I opened my eyes, it was to the back of Bella's head and soft body rocking against me. I didn't hesitate to join her in this feeling, so I angled myself more accordingly to her frame and adjusted myself at her soft round butt to bring her aligned with my length.

When I laid back down, I felt her rock more fully against me and it made the sweetest friction all around my now painful erection. I showered kiss upon kiss to her shoulders and back before grabbing her head and tilting it for a better access.

She gave me what I wanted and tilted her head further, before grabbing my hand and driving it to her core. She had slipped me under her pajama pants and I was rubbing the sensuous silk of her panties that were now dripping wet. I groaned at the pleasure she was clearly sharing with me and sought after more for her. I brought my hand under her final barrier and swore at the heat it was emanating on my hand.

I dipped two fingers in her very gently and curled them up to hit her sensitive spot that she loved me to touch so much. I drove her over the edge faster than I had planned to, but when I felt her warm juices running over my fingers I couldn't help myself. Bella was practically crying in pleasure as I helped her come down only to heighten her back up again.

"You're so wet, love. Mmm...I love that you're dripping for me baby...the way you're ready to take me in you."

She panted at that and it encouraged me more. She loved to hear me talk to her as we came together like this and I enjoyed the reactions I received as rewards.

"Take me baby...make me yours...right now. Please..."

I gulped at her words because it felt so right. She was mine...only mine, and I was all hers, Forever. I pulled at my pajama bottoms and kicked my legs free as fast as possible. As soon as I was bare to her, I yanked her panties down and pulled them the rest of the way with my foot to lay her before me equally.

I was shaking with desire, as I lifted her leg gently over my hip and pressed into her. I don't know what it was, because we had used this position almost religiously over the last month or so, but when I entered her this time, it felt as if I were in uncharted territory. I felt her muscles clenching and unclenching around my length and I was filling her up to the hilt. I was literally lost in the way her body fit around mine, when I realized her luscious ass was nestling my balls with every stroke. She was made for me, and I for her.

I needed to slow myself so we could enjoy the pleasure we were experiencing, so my strokes became slower and I realized immediately that it was not only extending the feeling, but maximizing the sensations. With each slow stroke her body would tighten and release me slowly only to repeat the action over again.

I could hear Bella panting and crying her gentle chants of ecstasy as I continued on this slow and euphoric ride with her. After a few minutes, she grabbed my left hand that was tucked under her waist and rested it just under her belly and above her pubic bone.

"Do you feel that baby? That's you in me right now. Nothing makes me feel as good as this does right here love...nothing." She flexed her muscles that were over my swollen cock to emphasize her words and I gasped at the feeling.

"Fuck" Was all I could get out, it was the only thing my mind would get out at the moment and it summed up the emotion it evoked in me. I picked up our pace and kept my hand where she had placed it. Luckily for us, my fingers were long enough to reach her clit and I massaged it at the speed we were currently set at.

She relaxed her head to my shoulder and the rest of her body followed. When she did, her core took me in further, and had she not done it while I was so aware, I wouldn't have thought it was possible.

"Make love to me baby. Just love me..." I heard those soft words spoken and melted for her immediately. I released my right hand from her hip and used it to stoke over her tender breasts and body. I sucked gently on her earlobe while whispering my love and undying devotion for her over and over again.

"Always baby...I'll always make love to you, always want you, always need you..." The tenderness of this moment over took me and it pushed me toward the edge. I needed her to come again before I could let this end; I wanted to show her only joy and love. I sped up my fingers and sucked on her neck and lobe.

"Oh god...oh god! Almost...there...baby...OH!!!!!" She cried out to me. I felt her tightening over my length and it sent me into my climax just as she spilt over my cock. The ride I was on didn't seem to want to end and I was thankful, my body refused to come down from the high I was on and I was just fine with that. I was filled to the hilt inside the woman I loved and she was bringing me to the deepest most intense orgasm I had ever experienced.

After what felt like hours, I was able to breathe deep and get my body under control. I dropped my lips to her shoulder and nipped at her soft and beautiful skin.

I worked my lips down her body and found the strength to pull out of her, but just barely. I loved this part of the day, the part where I was filled with the essence of her body completely. I loved that I was the one to elicit those sweet moans and soft whimpers from her lips. My pride was over flowing when I caressed her growing middle, it was _I_ who had filled her, _I_ who gave her a part of me to carry for us. She was my prize in this life and she was the reason for my every breath.

As I got lower and lower over her body, I could feel her reacting. I lingered my tongue on her barely visible hip bones and paid extra attention to the inner parts of her thighs. I knew that part of her body drove her insane with anticipation, and I had only just begun.

I ached for the moment when she would grip my hair and lead me to where she wanted me most. This is why I was given life...it was to give this woman pleasure in any form she desired. I was hers completely; mind, body and soul.

Just as she grabbed my hair and whispered my name, there was a knock at the door. I cursed whoever it was who knocked and pryed myself away from my loves body.

After scurrying around and throwing our clothes back on in haste, I sent Bella to the bedroom for bottoms and went to answer the door. There was a very good chance, I would kill whoever it was that had ruined that intimate moment for us, so when I approached the door I made myself calm down a little before looking through the peep hole.

When I saw my parent's faces I immediately thought the worst. They never arrived anywhere unannounced and the fact that they were currently standing outside our door made me more than uneasy.

I unlocked the door to let them in, but when I opened the door I was met with relaxed and relieved faces. My heart calmed considerably as I ushered them in from the hallway.

"Hey...what's going on?" I asked. My fathers face was beaming and my mothers was a mirror of his as well.

"Well son, actually we have some very good news. For both of you...um where's Bella?"

Just as he asked she came slowly down the hall dressed in her maternity jeans and a brown casmiere seater wrap. She looked so beautiful and I couldnt help going to her immediatly. I wrapped her up in my arms and peppered her face with kisses.

My dad spoke up and it caught our attention back from each other and onto the matter at hand.

"We hate to interrupt your time together, especially since it's spread so thin these days so we"ll be brief and then let you alone okay?"

I turned to look at him and then felt my heart jump as he said in very simple english, "Tanya has been handled, she's gone now."


	29. Chapter 29

Thanks Tina! (rangernstephfan) You are an amazing Beta and I appreciate all your hard work on this story ;) Everyone thanks for the reviews and support! I love writing and finding that you like it.

**Songs: **The Fear You Wont Fall- Joshua Radin

Day's Like this- Van Morrison

**Baby Furniture Links**: http://www(dot)shopbeautifulbeginnings(dot)com/product/put_?pic=1215

http://www(dot)shopbeautifulbeginnings(dot)com/product/put_?pic=2257

http://www(dot)shopbeautifulbeginnings(dot)com/product/put_?pic=2259

Three Chapters left: Enjoy!

* * *

_"Tanya has been handled, she's gone now." _

I stood there with Edward dumbfounded. I wanted to jump, scream and cry all at the same time. In my head munchkins were twirling around a yellow brick road singing Ding dong the wich is dead!

I knew Carlisle wouldnt resort to violence, I didnt even need to ask. Im sure he had an elaborate plan concocted long before they had even entertained the idea of seeing her in the first place, but either way, I was happy. I clutched onto Edwards waist and listened intently as he asked his father and mother exactly how they had gotten her to concede.

My mouth was hanging open with shock by the time the story was told, and from the looks of Edwards face so was he. She really did have a slew of problems, and our relationship only hit the tip of the icebergh when it came to the rest of her mental stability.

She was gone. Carlisle and Esme had seen to it that Edward and I would no longer be bothered. When the story was finished I went to both Carlisle and Esme and wrapped them into a tight hug. With my protruding belly and uncoordination, it didnt take long for my grace to go into effect. Just as I had stepped toward them, my socks slid underneath my feet and I was falling forward. My heart was about to burst from fear, I vaguely remember wrapping my arms around my belly as a form of protection, but just as I had braced myself for the fall, two sets of strong arms were around my body.

I squeaked my eyes open and saw both Carlisle and Edward with horror sticken faces as I lay inches above the ground between the two of them. Edwards arms were around my own, and Carlisle's were holding my waist. I gasped in response, the whole thing happened in the course of two seconds and my heart was still trying to get settled. Carlisle quickly made sure that Edward had me securely and only when he assured him twice did he let me go.

Edward tucked me into his side and dropped his head into the crook of my neck whild his arms rubbed over my belly.

"God baby, are you alright? Are you hurt? Do you feel any pain?" His words were rushed and flustered. I finally caught my breath and then lost it again as I felt the baby kicking all over.

"I'm okay love, but she seems to have not liked all that excitement..." I was rubbing over my large middle to show them what I meant. Just as I was about to tell them she was kicking, Esme squealed in delight.

"_Oh! Goodness Carlisle, she's kicking! Our grandaughter's kicking!"_

Esme's hands were franticly rubbing over my sweater and to all the exact spots that our little joy had been kicking. I looked up to her and smiled wide, glad that they could experience our joy as well. Carlisle looked to me silently asking for permission and I nodded encouragingly for him to join.

Edwards arms were wrapped around my own and I rested my head against his chest as we admired his parents doting over our unborn love. We listened to them laugh and cheer in excitement over each move and thump. Finally the kicking died down and the smiles faded into frowns.

"I guess we should let you two go back to whatever it was you were doing before we interrupted." Carlisle said.

I could be wrong, but it looked as if he winked at Edward before grabbing Esme's arms and pulling her away. She protested quietly at first, but then realized we were getting one of our rare moments alone and then hurried out the door.

Edward and I laughed in each others arms for a moment before he pulled away and whispered into my ear, "So...we should get back to where we left of, love... Doctors orders." and with that he led us to the bedroom and picked up where he had left off earlier.

~**********~

It was around two in the afternoon before we pulled ourselves away from the bed. For having been so _active_ all morning, I was surprisingly refreshed. I took a shower while Edward took a small nap and when I walked back in the room he was dressed and waiting for me on the bed. I took one look at him and thanked the lord above for the man in front of me. Not only did he love me, but he sure knew how to make a white cotton shirt look like _Gucci._

I went to him and sat down on his knee in nothing but my towel. He rubbed my back and kissed my shoulder tenderly while I cuddled into his chest. He just continued to caress and drop kisses to my body an then spoke gently into my ear.

"Let's go out for a bit baby, I want to show you off and spoil you." I laughed a little at the idea of him showing me off. I was round and cranky most days, not to mention my need to eat every three seconds or pee like a water faucet.

"_Oh yeah, show me off like the grand prize I am..." My words were laced with sarcasm and my eyes were rolling so much you could of mistaken it for a seizure._

He just grabbed my chin and held my gaze with intensity while he whispered against my lips, " Yes, love. Thats exactly what you are, you are my prize in this life...you both are." My heart was tight with the intensity of his words. I couldnt find words and only respond with a deep kiss.

When I was dressed and presentable to walk amongst the rest of Chicago, we headed out into the cold November weather. Thankfully the garage was heated and our car was a decent temperature and not a popsicle.

We went out for a quick lunch and then made our way through the traffic and ended up at _Beautiful Beginings._ Edward and I had spent a good part of the last month discussing our furniture options for the nursery. I wanted to wait and purchase anything before we moved into the house, but Edward was just too anxious. At lunch he talked me into just looking for the time being and seeing if anything unique caught our eye, if it did, we would buy it and have it shipped when we moved. It sounded reasonable so I agreed.

I stayed cuddled into Edwards side as we first made our way around the store. The boutique was filled with delicate and beautiful furniture that was catching my eye at all directions. Eventually I began venturing off on my own and picturing pieces that would fit in the room we had designed for our little one.

I knew that I wanted soft pieces that were classic and could work with Antique themes. Esme, Alice and I had designed the nursery with a double room floor plan to give us maximum space for all the things I wanted. The walls were going to be a soft creme color with built in shelving and the wood floors would be selected accordingly, depending on what furniture we chose for the room.

I spared no part of my imagination for the nursery. I had even requested that a balcony and french doors be added as well. I had imagined waking for an evening feed and the weather being lovely enough for me to sit outside and rock the baby under the stars. When Edward had asked me about my requests for the nursery and I told him of the doors and balcony, a smile hinted at his lips, but when he inquired further and I spilled about my vision that led me there, his face became warm and full of love as he said, "I think thats a wonderful idea, baby".

When I reached the back of the boutique, there was a set up that caught my eye immediatly. I walked a bit faster to get a better look at what was there, and when I reached it, I knew I had found what I wanted.

The crib was short and looked as if it had come from a story book, it was buttermilk with soft hints of gold and pink in the detailed vine design that decorated the wood frame. The look was definatly classic and soft, just what I had envisioned. Little creme bows tied in the front rails and gave it just the touch I craved. I wanted it, this is the crib our baby would come home to and I wasnt affraid to ask, beg and plead with Edward to get it now.

I turned quickly to find him and ask, but my search was short, he was right behind me but his back was turned and he was focused on Prams.

"Edward, baby come here please." He turned instantly and walked up to me wrapping me in his arms.

"What is it, love?" He kissed my nose and smiled down to me. I was happy he had talked me into this today, and beyond that I was happy to be sharing this experience with him, and him alone.

"I-I want to buy this one...today...please?" I forced myself to keep his gaze and not look down while I asked, I wanted this and I wanted him to realize how much. I couldnt help biting my lip a little as he returned my gaze and then smiled softly.

"You can have what ever you want baby, you dont need to ask me...I'll give you anything...anything at all." I got a soft kiss to my lips and then he called over his shoulder to the sales woman trailing us since we had walked in. She was older and probably a grandmother, but her smiles toward us were sincere and sweet since we had walked in together.

"_Yes sir, how can I help you?" _She asked as she reached where we stood.

He grinned to me before answering her, "We would like to purchase this crib today." Before I could stop myself I blurted out, "And the bedding as well! The same exact bedding."

I didnt even care if I sounded frantic, I just wanted this to be ours and it got me excited. I felt the baby kick again and so did Edward, he rubbed his hand over my belly and secured me into his side more.

"_Just the crib or the set?" _ She asked us. Her eyes shooting from Edward to I with a questioning smile.

I turned back and noticed the entire set surrounding us and it took my breath away. It was all so lovely and perfect. I started walking toward the tags that hung on the pieces, but Edward grabbed my hips and brought his lips to my ear.

"Do you want this set love? Is it what you see in her room?"

I nodded my head quickly and turned to tell him we could get the pieces over the next few months, but just as I opened my mouth he had already told the woman we wanted the full set. I watched as he handed her his shiny black AMEX card and she went on her way.

He was beyond good to me, he always had been. I didnt protest or fret, I just hopped up on my tip toes and kissed his cheek. "Thank you Edward...just..thank you."

He furrowed his brow and caressed my cheek. "No baby, _thank you_...your giving me our daughter love. I'll get you anything your heart desires."

We walked to the register and spoke with the old woman who's name was Adele. She let us know that it would be at least 10 weeks until our crib was delivered, the set was hand crafted and then shipped directly to you, and we were fine with that. It gave us time to get squared away and the house on target.

We left there hand in hand and decided to give Alice and Jasper a call. We hadn't seen them too much since the decision to build our house, and with contractor and design meetings held weekly, our time was limited. However Edward had the rest of today off and didnt work until the afternoon tomorrow so we decided to take advantage of that .

Alice was more than happy to have us over, so we headed straight there. Jasper and Edward volunteered to make dinner for us all and so after walking me upstairs and making sure I was comfortable, he and Jasper headed back out to the grocery store down the corner for supplies.

Alice and I sat on the couch laughing and talking about recent developents and Tanya. She almost choked on her wine while I told her the story her parents had shared with us earlier and then squealed in delight as I told her about the babys kicks.

"Oh Bella! Im just so happy for you both. Finally, everything is starting to even out and look up again." I smiled and exhaled in relief at the truth in her words. It was all going to be okay now, it was only Edward and I again, and soon our daughter would join our world.

I drank my water and nibbled on different snacks that Alice had around while we talked about everything from the crib to her and Jaspers relationship.

"He's wonderful Bella. I love him so much...I didnt know I could or would ever feel this way about another person."

I felt the tears burning my eyes as I smiled at her. She was my best friend and I loved her. I wanted her to be happy in so many ways, and luckily Jasper was filling all those roles on his own.

"Why are you crying Bella? Are you okay?" Alice asked. I started laughing because my hormonal blubbering was just more than I could handle right now. I nodded fiercly and hugged her tight.

"I'm just so happy for you Alice. Really, truly happy for you."

Our men came back in just then carrying loads of canvas bags with fresh vegetables and Parsly peaking out of the top. Edward had just set his bags down and strode over to me as quickly as his legs would let him and placed a kiss to my lips.

"I missed you" He said simply. I nodded and kissed him back. "I missed you too".

*******************

Dinner was relaxing, Edward and Jasper prepared the entire meal while Alice and I sat around talking and laughing while listening to music and nibbling on cheese and crackers.

Edward and Jasper would join us occasionaly to drop a kiss or refill water and wine, but for the most part Alice and I got to enjoy each other again. I missed her so much over the last few months. We saw each other at family dinners and even while designing the house with Esme, but our talk time consisted of everything outside and not within our everyday's.

I told her how I was looking for a new writing position and that through her dad I was able to make numerous contacts that were all willing to let me come on staff as a senior writer and do freelance. I hadnt really talked it through with Edward yet, but I knew he would be supportive of me doing anything as long as it made me happy. I was just starting to realize that if I stayed where I was then I would have limited time with the baby, and I didnt want that.

When we sat down to eat I almost cried at the arrangement that filled our plates. Grilled steak and Salmon with garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus. I was currently obsessed with eating steak. It was all I had for dinner usually and with it garlic became a staple. I had garlic in everything I ate now and even found that the smell was lovely to me these days.

Edward kissed my cheek and whispered into my ear, "I put cloves in the steak for you baby. Eat, enjoy."

I rested my head on his shoulder a moment and than kissed his cheek before whispering my thanks.

I devoured my meal while everyone else ate slowly and spoke comfortably amongst each other. No one paid any attention to the fact that I had inhaled my entire meal and if they did, they chose not to speak of it. I appreciated that.

Cheese Cake was for dessert, and by the time I had my second piece, I was exhausted. I rested against Edward on the couch while Jasper and Alice told us about their upcoming vacation to Italy. When Edward began telling them of places to go and things to see, I began to doze off. Between the full stomach and soothing lull of Edwards voice echoing through my ears while I layed my head on his chest, I was a gonner.

Next thing I knew Edward was about to pick me up and carry me, but I woke instantly and righted myself. I was much heavier now than I had been before and I would die a hundred deaths if he couldn't lift me. Instead he settled for supporting my weight and walking me to the car close by his side the entire way.

When we arrived home I dragged my body toward the elevator and settled into Edwards side again. My eyes were heavy and my body felt like cement.

I walked through the front door and headed straight back toward the room and found pajamas. Edward was in there right after I had began brushing my teeth. He had locked up and was drawing the covers back for us. It was only ten pm but I was exhausted.

I debated on showering again and the need to be fresh won over my tired body. Edward joined me in the bathroom silently and then started the bath tub. I began undressing and he continued pouring bubbles and then lighting the eucalyptus candles.

"Get in baby...relax while I bathe you, love._" _I rested my head on his chest and spoke gently to him.

"Only if you join me. Please?"

He smiled and nodded his yes and I began undressing him. He helped by pulling his shirt over his head and stepping out of his pants and boxers.

He led us over to the water and then stepped in to get settled and held his hand out for me to take. I stepped in with his help and settled my body against his back. We sat that way in peace and quiet for a few minutes before he began soaping my skin and talking to me.

"I cant wait for our house to be done love." He said gently. I nodded my head yes to him in agreement. I truly couldnt wait for it either, it would be different when we had a place that was _ours. _The house was designed around both our likes and we would be sharing and joining our lives once we stepped inside to live.

Right now he was living in my comfort zone and though I knew he liked it, I felt bad that it didnt have any touch of him to it at all. I still felt like we werent fully connected this way, so when we designed the house, I was ecstatic to have him with me while we poured our desires over the pages.

I was just as anxious for the house to be ready as he was now that I thought about it. I giggled a little and cuddled into him deeper while he kissed my head.

Also the sooner our house was done, the sooner the baby would be here. Edward had just finished washing my belly, arms and breasts, when I decided to take his loofa and return the favor. I skillfully manuvered so that I was kneeling in front of him and repeated the actions he had performed on me.

"Thank you, Edward. I had a great day with you, it was perfect." He grinned and wrapped me in his arms quickly before kissing me deeply. My breath was almost gone entirely when he pulled back. His hands moved from my back to the sides of my belly and he drew lazy circles over and over.

"Let's go to bed, Love." He stood and then gently pulled me up to join him. When my robe was in place and I was dry enough, we made our way to bed.

I loved feeling Edwards naked body pressed against my own, so I didnt even bother wearing anything to bed. He snuggled in deep behind me and held me to him while continuing to rub gentle circles over my belly. I fell asleep moments later.

~**************~

**EPOV**

Bella fell asleep not long after she had rested her head against the pillow. She was absolutly adorable at this stage in her pregnancy and I took advantage of watching her sleep at any chance she gave me. Tonight had been just what we needed, the entire day had been what we needed.

When she chose the nursery furniture, I almost lept out of my skin. I was so happy to see that she was embracing this as much as I was and it soothed my heart to know we were furnishing _our baby's _nursery. Each step we took in this pregnancy was leading us closer and closer to where we were meant to go. She had absolute control of me and it was more than okay with me.

I began setting things up for her and I in little ways over the last few months. Everything from cars to housing, even money.

I had set up a joint bank account for us and we both had our payroll deposited into it now. We each had credit cards and debit cards linked to one main account, and this ensured that either way our money was now _together. _

The only thing seperate was my trust fund, and that was because majority of it was wrapped up in stocks and investments, either way it was also ours and it was in no way near running on empty. The only major purchases made through it were the Mercedes and now the house, but even that was paid with maybe the interest saved from stocks. Bella had no idea what kind of life she would be able to have from here on out, and what made me smile was the fact that she didnt care.

She loved the house plans and even had fun picking colors and then furniture, but she enjoyed it because to her it was for our family, not to show off that we could have something nice. She was unmaterialistic and down to earth. I loved everything about the woman I held in my arms and knowing she was mine was enough to make me happy forever.

She had once told me she wanted a baby, a home and to vacation twice a year. It was her's now, as long as she wanted me, it was hers. Of course I wanted to marry her, I would marry her tomorrow if I thought she would say yes, but the fact that I wasnt sure she would is what kept me from asking.

My mother and father had both asked that burning question and I gave them the same answer each time. That _yes _I wanted to be with her forever and _yes _I wanted to make her my wife, but that I didnt know if she would say yes to me and the fear of that alone was gripping my chest at night.

However, I knew that she loved me and the fact she wanted me around everyday was enough to calm my nerves considerably. So much so that I had gone to my mother last month and told her I was ready.

~***********~

Two weeks had gone by in a flash for Bella and I. My residency would be over in just one more week and then I would have a permanent position here at Michael Reese and my schedule would be much calmer than the yoyo it was now.

My life was looking up and my love for Bella only grew. We hadnt seen a whole lot of each other this last week, because she had been assigned some extra stories at the Tribune and was spending a lot more time in the office.

I hated seeing her so stressed and even more that she was tired. Her body had gone through a lot over the last month and I didnt want her having a repeat visit to the hospital because of it.

I was currently at the site of our new home. Building was under way and thanks to my mom, it would be completed rather quickly. The baby was due at the first of May and we were currently only for days from Thanksgiving. I called Bella with the news of construcion happening in the background and she gave an excited laugh as I told her of the schedule.

My mother had finished her high profile clients and then passed her workload on to her employees to finish. She was now our fulltime eyes and ears at the house and would make sure every detail and possible problem was handled with an immediate solution. At the pace she had them working it would be as quick a finish as those on _Extreme Home Makeover._

I walked the property once more and smiled at the site of our home coming together from the bottom up. This was going to be the most significant step I had ever taken in my life, and I couldnt be happier that I was sharing it with Bella. Our worlds would be joined when this house was finished and our baby was born and that thought sent my already over excited head into a whirlwind.

I still had things I needed to do today, so with a final look at the construction behind me, I made my way to the volvo and headed back into the city.

My first stop was to the hospital, I had forms and contracts to pick up and look over for my new position. I was going to be taking about three weeks off between my start date and the end of my residency so that I could focus on Bella and getting her ready for the babys arrival.

We both agreed on taking some parenting classes and even some lamasse for the birth preperations. Beside that I just wanted to be with her as much as possible. The way things were going in our schedule worked, but I was never happy that when our routine would just start to flow, it would have to end.

My trip to the hospital was fast thanks to the easy flow of traffic. When I made it to the nurses station to find the Chief, I ran into my colleague Ben.

"Hey Cullen, what brings you in here on a day off?"

Ben knew I had a life outside of this place now and it was a shock to everyone when I had told them of Bella and our baby. Most were polite and congratulated, but there were a few in the program, mostly women, who were outright rude. Ben had been part of the congratulatory crew and his seemed sincere.

"Well, I need to pick up some papers to review for my position and I figured I would swing by now since it was on the way from the house."

He grinned and slapped my back.

"How's the progress coming along on that one? And Bella? How is she doing these days?"

When he mentioned Bella my face automaticly smiled. I loved that she was connected to me and that I knew intimate things like how she was doing. I snapped out of it just in time to realize he was waiting on an answer.

"House is a work in progress, but its progress. Bella is great...she looks wonderful and she and the baby are doing very well."

Ben finished up his chart that he was scribbling on and nodded his head.

"Well...good. Take care if I dont see you before your time off."

With that I turned to begin my hunt for Dr. Cooper. When I had all I needed and was satisfied that I had done all my errands, I made my way home.

It was about 5 in the evening now and Bella would be home soon. I had grabbed fresh meat and vegetables while I was out so I could start dinner before she got there.

I was chopping vegetables and prepping the meat when I heard the door open and her heels clicking on the hardwood floors.

I rinsed my hands and went to find her, but when I turned the corner and saw her face, my heart almost broke.

Her eyes were sad and her cheeks were wet. I almost sprinted to her in fear that she was hurt and grabbed her in my arms.

"Baby, whats wrong?" I just held her to me as she tucked her face in my chest and cried a little longer. I hated that something was upsetting her and I wanted only to make her feel good. I scooped her up bridal style and went to the couch to set her down.

She kissed my cheek and curled into a little ball on the couch with her head in my lap. I stoked her hair and wiped at her cheeks in silence while she calmed down. Finally she popped her head up to face me and mumbled a strangled _sorry._

Before I had to ask again what was wrong, she began.

"I'm not happy, Edward." Those were the words that I feared hearing for the last five months. This was it, she was done. She must have reflected on our relationship and realised that I wasnt good enough for her. I felt my chest tighten and my breath hold as I waited for the words that would destroy me.

"I dont want to stay at the Tribune anymore...its not getting me anywhere and after the day I just had Im not sure this is what I want to be doing anymore."

As the words processed in my head, I realised she was talking about her job. I exhaled in relief quite loudly and then hugged her to me tightly. Relief washed over my body as I comprehended her last sentence.

She wasnt happy with her job, not me. I pulled back and tried to recover from the panic attack I had just silently experienced in front of her. She didnt seem to notice and I was greatful for the saved embarassment, instead of dwelling on my racing heart I focused on what she had just said.

"What happened baby? Why arent you happy there anymore?" I threw in the direct question to make sure it was indeed her job that was the problem.

She sat back and placed her self on my right side with her legs hanging over my lap, with a final deep breath she began.

"Its been horrible Edward...Im sorry I havent told you, but the last couple of weeks have just been..._horrible." _ she was shaking her head and her brow was furrowed in angst.

"My Editor took a lot of work from the others and threw it my way because she said that I needed to prove my commitment to the job. I have double the work than anybody else and no help. I probably sound like a ridiculous baby, but its very difficult work, Edward. I cant just hop from story to story the way she expects me to, no one can...its not good work that way and it reflects in the pieces."

She was breathing hard now and her face was angry.

"At first I thought it was because we were short handed, but after talking with everyone and hearing from them that they were requesting more work and not getting it, Im convinced that this is some sort of personal attack. I confronted her today and asked if there was an issue I needed to be made aware of. She just blew me off and said that if I couldnt meet the standards than maybe I was in the wrong field.

I was thoroughly pissed off now as well. My jaw tensed and I had to remind myself that Bella was an adult and could fight her own battles, right now she was venting and needed me to listen not try and fix this. With every ounce of control I had I sat there in silence and nodded my head.

Bella looked up at me and then her face fell a bit. "Im sorry, Edward. I shouldnt be whining about this but its just been eating at me lately."

_"No baby, please continue...Im here for you, whatever you need, just let me know what I can do to help."_

Bella sat up, squared her shoulders and took a deep breath. I took in her new posture and mirrored her as to prepare for whatever it was she would say next.

"Actually Edward, there is something I would like to discuss with you."

I raised an inquisitive eyebrow to her and nodded, "Okaaaay, go ahead."

Bella curled her legs indian style and rested her hands on her belly. I smiled at the action because she looked so sweet. I couldnt help but kiss her lips before sitting back and watching her with a smile on my face.

"Well as I said earlier, I dont want to stay at the Tribune." I nodded in acknowledgement and it clicked where this conversation was going. I had to force myself to shut up before I blurted out that she didnt have to work ever again. She had something planned out and it obviously took her time to build up to this and I wasnt going to ruin her moment.

"Well, remember that Yale mixer Paul and I attended with your parents? Well I met a lot of great contacts and a few gave me their info incase I wanted to venture out...and well...I've been in contact with a few of them."

Well this wasnt where I thought it was going and now I was perplexed by what this would mean. Did she want to move? Leave me and take the baby to another state? My panic was bubbling again and I could only nod with what Im sure was fear on my face.

"I was offered a position with an online political site. I would write pieces and they would be published through this site and picked up by various places...however, I would work from home...and secondly I would be taking a pay cut for the first year."

She bit her lip and squinted her eyes as if waiting for me lash out or something. I was still waiting for her to tell me she was moving to Alaska or New York, so I raised my eyebrow as if in challenge for her to continue. We both sat that way for about twenty seconds before she huffed out exasperated.

"Well!?"

That was it? A pay cut? Seriously? I started laughing as relief washed over my body for the third time since we started talking. Bella furrowed her brow and slapped my arm in annoyance.

"Dont laugh at me...Im being serious, not joking."

I shook harder at her thinking I was laughing at her pitch, when in all actuality I was laughin at my over active imagination. I pulled her to me and kissed her lips hard. She responded in kind and it stopped my hysterics.

"Baby, is that it? Your concerned about the pay cut? Well dont worry about that, love. I make more than enough to support us even if you didnt want to work at all. But since you do, and I want you to be happy...just chose what you want based on you. Im here either way...okay?"

She nodded and sat back, clearly not finished with this topic.

"Well it's not just the money Edward... this position would allow me to be home with the baby and still have my career. I love this baby so much already Edward, and I love my writing. This would allow me to have the best of both worlds..."

It hit me then the dynamics of her world. Bella had worked very hard to get where she was today. her greatest accomplishment to date was the degree she held from Yale and the life she had created on her own for herself. It was ridiculous for me to entertain a thought of her not wanting to continue on with her career.

I stopped being funny and held her face with an intense gaze.

"I understand what this would mean for you, Bella. I think its a great opportunity for all of us. I just want you to be happy...I think you should take it. Your office will be ready and more than adequate for you to work from home the way you would need...I dont see any reason for you not to do this."

She hugged me and nodded her head before dropping it to my neck. I kissed her head and held her to me in peace for a long moment.

"I just wanted to make sure you and I talked about it before I decided anything final...were a unit now ya know? These are important things to communicate...especially when the bread winner in the family will truly be carrying us from here on out the next year."

I liked that sentence a lot more than I should have. I was the provider now, the full on provider. It was my job now more than ever to take care of my family and ensure they had the life they deserved. In that moment I felt like a very big piece of my life puzzle was found. I was ready to meet this head on and do it well. My girls would want for nothing and I would be the one to see to that.

"Well its settled then...your going to take this job and Im going to make sure were living the life we want." I kissed her once more and stood. "Speaking of, I better get back to dinner... and you should call whoever you need to about accepting this position."

With a final smile I made my way back to the kitched and finished our meal.


	30. Chapter 30

When you get to BPOV the house, you might like to set the mood with **Alexi Murdoch_(All Of My Days)_**

Thank You Tina! (rangernstephfan) I not only send you the stories to read and edit, but also my phone loves to call you when I walk to and from class...and I have to be at least three hours behind you. :(

Everyone that reviewed last chapter and the ones before...THANK YOU~ I hope this chapter meets your standards, but just so you know it almost went another way...I read and re-read the reviews and I just couldnt do it to you. Enjoy

**Two chapters left**

* * *

**EPOV**

We were in the eighth month...the eleventh hour. Our home had undergone some very interesting stalls that had pushed our deadline back weeks from what we had originally thought, but thanks to my mother, it was now complete.

Today, I was overseeing the movers packing up Bella's condo. Luckily for me though, Bella had arranged for the majority of furniture to be either sold or donated to charity. She had been working from home for the last few months and with only the stories she chose to write occupying her time, she was able to make all the extra arrangements that would be making my day less tasking. Besides, she was only taking from here the essential staples and the things that she wanted to incorporate into our home or her office.

I honestly wouldn't have cared at all if I was here all day long and frustrated out of my mind, but as it was today, I did mind.

I'd sent Bella to the spa with Alice so that she didn't have to be in middle of the chaos surrounding me right now. I wanted her relaxed and rested when she finally came home to the new house for the first time.

Of course Bella had been to the house already, but not while it was furnished. My mother had gone in with her team and decorated the pieces that Bella and I had selected and arranged them with our blessing. The only room that would not be touched was the nursery. I had made that only request and it was because I knew Bella had a vision for what she wanted and I wouldn't allow anyone to take that from her.

I had been up all morning making sure that things were squared away and ready for us to close up here. I was ecstatic to be getting into the new house, but even more excited to be sharing something new with Bella. There was plenty to do and even a time line to meet, but I couldn't relax and get focused...specifically because my mind was on overload right now.

I had one thing occupying my thoughts right now and that was that I was going to be proposing tonight when she came home for the first time...

It just felt right; today we were joining our lives in a way that would be concrete. This home was where we would raise our family and start our future...the symbol of what was to come. The only thing missing was Bella, as my wife. I had decided this not long after speaking with my father on Thanksgiving. I had wanted to do it then, but still hadn't found the nerve. He had pulled me aside and told me that if it didn't feel like the easiest thing in the world, then it wasn't the right time.

Today however was different. Aside from my nerves, I had no hesitancy over asking her this question. I wanted to do it...I was jumpy because it felt as if time was standing still today, even amongst the energy that was filling the room with the movements around me.

I made sure all the proper things were packed and being moved down stairs, while the donations were set aside for pick up later in the afternoon.

Hours later, I was sitting in an empty apartment; save for the donation boxes that would be picked up within the hour. All morning thoughts of Bella were flooding my mind. Images of her in a wedding gown…exchanging vows and being my wife.

She was it; she was all I wanted...ever.

The depth of this moment was more tangible than ever before, as the days and weeks had turned into months, I realized that it was exactly what I wanted. I took one last look around the apartment to kill time and then the charity group came and picked up the remaining boxes.

I let myself mentally prepare for what was needed to be done.

~*******~

I arrived at the house with three hours to spare. Instead of cooking in the immaculate kitchen that awaited me, I ordered out from the finest restaurant in Chicago . I sent Jasper a text with a request to have Bella home promptly at six o'clock pm, no sooner and no later. For obvious reasons, I chose not to tell Alice of my plans for the evening. She sometimes got so excited that things slipped without meaning to and surprises were ruined.

With food now taken care of and the ring polished and sitting in the little, black velvet box up stairs, only one thing was left for me to do.

The house was already set up and the furniture was in place. Currently, my mother was in Bella's office putting away the last of the items we had just boxed over here and then she would be on her way.

I made my way upstairs to my office and shut the door before taking a seat at my desk. With a deep breath and a smile in place, I began writing my reflections of Bella on thick ivory cards....

___________________________________________________________________________

**BPOV**

I love this place...I love Edward...I love my life.

These were the thoughts running through my head currently. Edward had demanded that I go to the spa today, the day that we were to move in completely to our new home. The fact that I knew there were things that needed to be done, still had bothered me a bit, but the thought of avoiding the chaos and possible injuries was enough to ease my guilty mind.

I had taken the position that allowed me to work from home, I thanked god every morning I woke up tired and achy that I didn't have to go to an office and deal with the chaos. In part, I deserved to be a little selfish, I thought the last three months were among the better of my career. My stories were picked up, my work was appreciated and my inspiration came in the form of a naked Adonis that slept cuddled to my form at night. Life just didn't get any better from here.

Since I was easily available these days, I had made sure to do all the tasks that didn't require manual labor, so I had shopped, picked paint swatches even hardwood floor samples. I made sure my old condo's furnishings were either sold or donated so that Edward could focus solely on the movers. At the end of the day, I had contributed to the production of our home as much as Edward and it was the deciding factor in my agreeing to be away today.

My ever growing belly had reached a new level of large these days, but I had also managed to gain only baby weight and keep a descent silhouette. Today my body was being treated to the works, Edward had taken to booking my appointments these days, and mostly because I had stopped making them myself when I had taken this now lower paying position. Initially, I had stopped because it felt like a luxury I could do without, now that Edward was carrying us mostly, it felt rude to assume I could live off his hard earned money. Now a days, I would find a post it note and a text reminder from Edward telling me when my next appointment was, it never mattered how many times I insisted it was unnecessary, the bookings continued and I showed up.

As much as I would have liked to protest, I had grown accustomed to my spa trips over the past five years. It was a luxury and under any other circumstance, I would fret and make pissy remarks, but now, I really needed them more than ever to feel good about myself. My body ached and my skin was going crazy with the hormones.

I had a ninety minute massage so far, as well as a facial, body scrub and now a gentle mask was being placed over my belly to keep the stretch marks away. As I relaxed and got pampered, I let my mind take in the reality of our world.

Our lives were working together in a very soothing unison. Edward's schedule had calmed down considerably and for the most part his evenings were spent at home with me on the couch or at Lamaze class. I found that having him around as much as he was, calmed my nerves and kept my angry hormones at bay...it was difficult to focus on negatives when Edward looked at me so adoringly and took me with abandon at every possible chance he got.

Our sex life had defiantly not suffered, if anything we were worse now than we were in the beginning. When he made love to me, my body was ablaze with flames of passion and need. He never rushed or tried to search out for him, it was always a steady need flowing through our bodies as we rediscovered each other in intimate ways.

Edward was my other half, my completion in this life. Over the last month or so, I let myself get down a little at the thought that we hadn't really moved further ahead than where we were. I would immediately scold myself though, I couldn't blame him and he had defiantly shown his commitment to us by purchasing our vehicle and then basically funding our new home and financially carrying our family. Suddenly, the thought of wanting a ring too sounded ridiculously selfish and unappreciative.

Besides, Brad and Angelina had a pretty sweet set up and they weren't married. Now days, it wasn't as taboo and to be honest, I wouldn't have cared if it was. Esme's words had come back to me over and over during the dwelling periods and they calmed my nerves and settled my angst. She had said, "Conventional is overrated Bella, just be happy." And I was...I truly was…so I decided to let it go and flow with the breeze. All that mattered was that Edward was with me and in this for the long haul.

His undying commitment to me was all I needed these days and if by now I hadn't realized just how much he loved me, then I would never really comprehend it. However, I did know and I did accept it. It was all I needed and with that final reassurance, I let the thoughts of marriage dissolve from my mind.

**************

Alice had joined me after her treatments were completed. She sat across from me while the overlay was removed from my belly and I was cleaned off properly. My face reflected the same feelings as hers I'm sure, she seemed relaxed and content.

We had a full day there and even a nice lunch during our pedicures. I was ready to sleep at this point and with minimal kicking from the baby today, the idea of curling up with Edward was a strong possibility.

When I was all finished and there was no more to be done to our bodies, we made our way out of the doors and into Jaspers BMW. Alice 's porsche wasn't exactly the easiest to maneuver in and out of and the thought of driving today was not on my ideal list of things to do for the day. Jasper volunteered his services of dropping and picking us up and right now it was the best decision we had ever made.

We made our way up the curve of the road and into the backed area of our new property. The excitement was filling me whole as we got closer and closer to the secluded area that was now my home.

We pulled up to the front and I gathered my things from the seat beside me. Surprisingly, Jasper had kept his engine idling while I did, I was a little sad that they weren't planning on coming in to get a glimpse at the new place, even more surprised that he hadn't jumped at the idea of seeing Edward.

Alice must have been thinking the same thing, because she spoke up and sounded irritated.

"Jas, cut the engine, let's go in and take a look! We have nowhere to be..."

Jasper coughed what sounded like a hairball and then his tone was off.

" Alice …no. I have somewhere to be and this little trip is going to take sometime to come back from...we really need to go, please...I can't be late."

Jasper glanced back at me and I looked away quickly. I instantly felt horrible for being an imposition and didn't want to be a cause for them fighting. I tried to recover and help him, so that he wouldn't look like the bad guy and Alice wouldn't yell at him.

"Yeah, Ali...I'm kinda beat anyway. Don't worry; we'll have you all over soon to see it properly."

I bit my lip and gave Jasper an apologetic smile and mouthed sorry from the back seat. His face turned from nervous to apologetic instantly and he looked like he was about to apologize, but I stopped him with my hand and smiled again. I knew he felt bad for the way it sounded, so I wasn't going to dwell on it.

I grabbed everything and with one last look made my way out the car and shut the door.

"Bye guys! Thanks again for the ride, Jasper!"

They both waved and turned to make their way around the circle drive. When I reached the front of the house, I noticed the big red bow attached to the front door with a card.

A smile had spread over my face at Edward lovely gesture. When I opened the card, tears had already made there way over the ledge of my eyes. Inside written in Edwards elegant script were the words, Welcome Home Bella.

It was a simple gesture and one of the most beautiful ones I had experienced with him. He built us a home...us...our family.

For the first time in my life, those words held a meaning like never before. Wherever he was, that's where my home would be. I held the envelope to my chest and turned the handle to let myself in.

The lights were all dimmed and the level they were set at accented the artwork and delicate furniture that decorated our foyer.

I stepped forward and my eyes were drawn to the floor. A red velvet ribbon was trailing up the way and attached to it was another envelope with my name written across the center. I stood in awe for a moment at the lovely sentiment Edward had done for me...this was his way of making my first night memorable and the idea of him as a whole brought on more gentle tears.

I reached for the envelope and pulled the thick ivory card and written across in his script was:

_Bella, as you walk into our home, think back to the moment you walked into my life. That night, the same vision of you doing exactly this passed through my mind as well...its just one more way you have made my dreams come true._

_Love, Edward_

My heart was overwhelmed by the beauty in that memory. Just the thought of him thinking of this that day was all I would need for the rest of my life. He loves me, he wants me. This was enough for forever.

I followed the ribbon and it led me into the dining room that was lit with candles and dinner. Again, another card laid waiting for me at the seat that would be mine in this home. I went to the card with my stomach fluttering and my eyes wet. I slid the card out and read the words that lay across the middle:

_My love, when I sat with you at dinner the night we met, I couldn't let go of you...perhaps it was a foreshadowing of things to come, because today my need has only grown and the feeling will never be sated...I love you with all that I have._

_Edward_

My mind was all over the place right now, I didn't want to get my hopes up, but all the signs were there. Suddenly, my eyes were dry and I was frantically trying to follow the ribbon again in hopes that my next note would either dispel my hope or complete my world. I was hoping with all that I was that Edwards's gesture was more than a welcome home.

The ribbon led me through our living room and past the large paneled windows and up the stairs. When I reached the second floor, my eyes continued to focus on the ribbon for any sign of another card. I had just reached my office door and saw another card lying across my desk where again the ribbon continued. I grabbed the envelope and opened it with excitement.

_Isabella,_

_Do you know that your beauty is just one small thing that draws me to you? I bet you didn't know that your strength, drive and intelligence are what speaks to my soul and calms my aching heart, when I am not with you. You have accomplished so many wonderful things and I know it is just the beginning. You can do anything in this world and I want you to know I will always stand beside you on that journey._

_You complete me, Edward_

My tears were back and I could feel my lip begin to tremble. This was real...please god let this be real. I smiled and kissed the card gently before following the ribbon to its next destination. My walk had led me to the master bedroom and as I reached the door, I saw that the ribbon tied into an elaborate bow, just like at the entrance. I steadied my breath and turned the handle to make my way to what I hoped was the next beginning.

My breath caught as I took in my surroundings. The room was covered in daisies...Hundreds of daisies and tea light candles. Every color was present and on the bed was another envelope. I looked around the room in search of Edward, but he was nowhere to be found. With one last glance around, I made my way to the bed and picked up the envelope.

_My Bella,_

_The morning I held you for the first time, you told me that daisies were the friendliest flower. No other flower has ever looked as beautiful to me as the one whose name is lucky enough to fall from your lips. This small journey ends here on our bed...the bed that will carry us into a new phase in our life. Any bed you share with me will carry many precious memories, for it was a bed that our love for each other, bore us a daughter...the same daughter you carry in you now as proof of our love and my life. You are the most precious being in my world love, so now I ask you to please come out to the balcony and join me. I will be out here waiting for you, my love...I will always be waiting for you._

My head snapped to the French doors and before I could think about anything else, I went to the doors and pulled them open.

There in the evening light was Edward, my Edward. He was down on one knee and holding a tiny black box, which sparkled and shined in the moon's light. My breath caught, but my legs somehow moved on their own accord. The tears in my eyes flowed freely now as I made my way to my future.

Edward took a deep cleansing breath and a warm smile spread over his face while he met my eyes. When I reached my place in front of him, I ran my hands through his hair and kissed his forehead, and then he began.

"Isabella...I had no idea I was supposed to be searching for you, instead you found me...You found me and loved me, unconditionally. You took me for who I was, fault and strengths, never once attempting to make me anything different. But in doing so, your love has changed me...changed me into the man I am today. I kneel before you, tonight, with the hopes I am enough to deserve you."

His voice was cracking and his eyes were glistening. He kissed my hands and pulled the ring from its box. I swallowed down the emotion threatening to shake me and focused on the words I had been dreaming of since the moment I met Edward Cullen.

"Isabella...my Bella, I ask you now to make me the luckiest man...the happiest man. Will you marry me?"

I pulled him up and wrapped my body in his arms while kissing him with all the love I could generate. After what felt like hours, I pulled away and nodded my head yes.

"Yes....God Yes, Edward...nothing would make me happier."

He held my hand and kissed each finger before sliding my ring to the place where it would stay, from now, until death do us part.


	31. Chapter 31

Only one more chapter and an extra for three years later. I truly hope you've enjoyed the story, and the characters. Its been a pleasur to write this for you. If you would really like to see something in the final chapter, let me know. I appreciate all the review as well, they lead me to what I want to write next ;)

Tina, (rangernstephfan) You have done such an amazing job as a Beta, the story would not be even a tenth of what it is if you hadnt helped me with brainstorming and editing. I truly appreciate the time you have put into the story, thank you again.

**Songs for this chapter: _Strawberry Swing- ColdPlay_**

**The deck: http://www(dot)potterybarn(dot)com/products/p12525/popup(dot)cfm?tool=vLarger&page=6&summary=&fromrgl=0**

* * *

**EPOV (Strawberry Swing)**

I was lying in bed, _our bed_, with Bella's belly gently draped half over my waist. Our evening had gone even better than I could have hoped for.

When she walked out onto that balcony, my world was complete. All of the fear and worry that had built up in me over the last year had melted away with just one look in her eyes. The beauty of that moment will stay with me for the rest of my life...I'll never share it with another being. That memory would be mine and mine alone.

We both stood out there just holding each other, kissing and caressing. I had hoped that my gesture was enough for her and by the look of adoring love that she gave me; I could now believe it was.

I had wanted to ravish her, just take her with abandon until the sun came up or we collapsed from exhaustion. It's what I wanted to do, but Bella was eight months pregnant and she needed to eat dinner. I knelt down to kiss our daughter once more before I took her inside.

I walked her down stairs to sit her at the table for dinner and as we made our way down stairs, I had attempted to gather the ribbon as we went, but she grabbed my hands and begged me not to do it yet.

"Please...just leave it. Let me enjoy this." she said.

How do you argue with that? I had no desire to do anything, but let her enjoy anything she wanted, so I nodded my agreement and kissed her lips then brought her ringed finger to my lips as well.

Our evening finished with a grand tour of the house and then a finale in the bedroom that had only ended just twenty minutes ago. The passion and love that had consumed us both was almost suffocating.

There were no expletives I can give to share the overwhelming and all consuming joy and pride I felt towards the woman currently snuggled deep into my arms, my fiancé. She would become Isabella Cullen...my wife.

I gently grabbed her left hand and brought her ring to my line of sight. I found myself doing this over and over as the hours ticked by in minutes. It was as if I needed the reassurance that it was all real and not a dream I had concocted in my brain from exhaustion.

I could feel the baby kicking beneath my forearm as I played with Bella's hand. Her kicks were becoming harder and more frequent as the days came. I saw Bella's face cringe in her sleep as another round of movements began inside her.

I very gently disentangled my body from hers and dropped down toward her torso. I rested my hands over her belly and whispered to her skin.

"Soon, sweetheart...soon. For now, can you try not to hurt mommy? Please?" I didn't feel silly, I knew that she could hear me and hoped that she knew that I loved her as well. I kissed our daughter and returned to my spot next to Bella. When I scooted into her form, she wiggled a little and whimpered in her sleep. I just smiled and kissed her, hoping it was a good dream she was having.

With one last look at her ringed finger, I closed my eyes and succumbed to sleep.

~**************~

The next week had flown right past us. Slowly, we began to get acclimated to our new surroundings. Today, Bella and I were determined to tackle the nursery to get it prepared for our little one. Bella was already a week into her eighth month now and the baby could very well come at any time.

The simple task of piecing together the room had slowly become a family affair. I had initially called Jasper because the pieces were heavy and we didn't want to scratch the floors by my sliding them. So naturally, Alice tagged along to be with Bella.

Jasper had done his best to keep her at bay once they had dropped Bella off for the proposal, but after a scolding and a smack in the head, he relented and confessed that I indeed had made him do it.

Alice at least had the decency to not call that night, but she bombarded us the following afternoon for details. Unfortunately, she and Jas both had been swamped at work and this was the first time we would see them in our new home as well as engaged.

My parents were a different story. I hadn't told either of them that I had planned on proposing to Bella that day, so when we called them the following morning and dropped the news, there was immediate screams and claps for joy. We had gone over that afternoon for lunch and Bella was congratulated and officially, welcomed into our family.

These last few days were a true joy to experience, waking up every morning with Bella by my side in our home was fulfilling in itself. However, the experience was that much better when we were surrounded by our things, in our home.

We belonged. Long gone were the days of staying over or grabbing clothes, we were a family. Even now, while waiting for the baby, our lives were joined.

Bella was at complete ease in the house. It was designed and decorated around her every desire. The kitchen was spared no expense, so that she could do all the wonderful things she loved to do and have the space she needed.

Our deck that led us outback was decorated and the weather was unseasonably warm today. So when I heard Bella call out to me through the intercom we had installed and I made my way down stairs and saw she had opened up the french doors leading outback, I knew what she was thinking.

When I got all the way inside the kitchen and saw her beautiful form seasoning and preparing the meat, my heart melted. She was wearing a long black flowing skirt with a white, Ed Hardy t-shirt. Her round belly and bare feet making their way around the kitchen, while talking and laughing with Alice was a vision. I silently thanked her for wanting the large paneled wood floors for the kitchen. It gave our home a comfortable feel and currently, my body was practically warm and fuzzy.

I made my way to her and wrapped my arms around her and kissed her neck to get her attention. She looked just too adorable for words.

"Hey" she breathed out when she turned into me.

"What is it, love? Do you need something?"

She relaxed in my arms and shook her head no, gently.

"I'm going to call your mom and dad to see if they want to come over for dinner? I was hoping we could Bar-B-Q...is that okay?"

God, would this woman ever not take my breath away? She loved my family so much and loved to be around them. I had many friends with wives, girlfriends, "life partners" who all hated each others families and only spent the necessary holiday, or funeral with them. I had hit the jack pot because not only did my love want to be around my family, but they adored her as well.

"Baby, you invite who ever you want; I'll just add the food to the grill accordingly." I kissed her head and rubbed her belly before grabbing the phone and calling my mother for her. Bella's hands were currently occupied, so I figured I would help her out a little.

************

With the entire Cullen clan now in our home, Bella and I got to become hosts to our guests for the first time. It was a wonderful feeling, the kind that completes you and makes you whole. I was walking around with a big stupid grin plastered on my face and despite the sideways glances I would get from Jas and my dad, but neither one said anything to try and make it go away.

Bella had come up stairs with my mother and Alice to guide our direction in the vision she had for the nursery.

It didn't take her long for the vision she had been holding within her to take form. The furniture matched perfectly with the walls and curtains and my mother had added some accents to the border, at Bella's request to give it a good balance.

When the last pillow was in place and the room was picture perfect, Bella strolled over to the french doors and opened them up. The soft butter crème curtains fluttered with the breeze and the sun carried into the room right along with them.

I looked to Bella to get a read on her emotions and all I could see was peace. She smiled gently and then grabbed my hand to lead us downstairs.

With our home complete and our family surrounding us, we had ourselves an impromptu dinner party. Granted it was very informal, but knowing Bella, this was all the extravagance she would want, so it was perfect.

Tonight we would be feasting on Steak, Lobster and Shrimp, so my dad and I went out back to the deck and started up the grill. Jas had headed out to the seafood market to grab the lobster Bella had just ordered and that gave my father and I a chance to talk.

"You're very happy son." He said it as a statement, not a question.

I smiled wider as I looked around my yard for a moment. The grass was lush and the deck was inviting. I broadened my view through the french doors that were fully open and admired the beauty of Bella. She was still laughing and talking with mom and Alice while sipping on her cider, occasionally, rubbing at her stomach to soothe the baby kicks. She was exquisite...she was mine.

I swallowed down the emotion ready to crack my voice and answered my father.

"I have never been so happy in my life. I cannot explain it...but one day I was just walking through my life one step at a time and then all of a sudden, Bella was there. She has given me everything I have ever wanted...and everything I didn't know to ask for."

Dad handed me a beer and patted my shoulder twice. He and I stood there admiring the view into the kitchen as our women smiled and laughed amongst themselves. I took a deep breath and made my way inside.

Bella had just turned her head to me as I walked in and when she met my eyes, she made up the distance and embraced me.

She continued her conversation, but did so from the comfort of my arms and chest. My mother just smiled and carried on as I held Bella's body to me securely. I stood there politely; holding Bella while they spoke and I took in the beauty of our lives.

** BPOV**

My cheeks were beginning to hurt. But it was only because I couldn't stop smiling. Esme, Alice and I sat in the kitchen just talking about the baby and our excitement over meeting her. Edward and I had discussed names, and currently I was torn between Elizabeth and Emma.

I told them about what was making me nervous and how I hoped I was a good mother. Instantly, they both reassured me that it would come naturally and that I would indeed take good care of my little bundle.

Both, Esme and Alice, made me give them details of Edwards's proposal; I had gone into every detail from me walking in the front door, then finally, out to the balcony. It ended there as far as they knew; I doubted that Esme or Alice wanted to hear the intimate detail of their Son and Brother.

All the same, I caught myself watching Edward as the day wore on, when he would come into the living room for something or when he simply cut through the kitchen to get to the garage for tools. The reality of our life came tumbling down on me and it made me smile. We were home.

I had a home. I was complete and currently everyone and everything I held dear was surrounding me. I may not have had a great childhood, my father was never present and my mother was in herself, a child. But right now, in this house, with that man, I had been given a new outlook. I felt all the trepidations slip away in that instant and the sorrow and pain that used to accompany me, was gone. The Cullen's had filled that ugly void and made it beautiful.

When all the food was prepped and Jasper had returned with the Lobster, the fun really began. I had small Braxton hicks' contractions throughout the rest of the evening from then on. I wasn't alarmed and I saw no point in telling Edward at this point, knowing him he'd kick everyone out and monitor me like a hawk. Besides, if this was the way I would go into labor, I wanted to enjoy everyone fully before it all got ugly.

I wasn't uncomfortable, but I could definitely feel the difference in my body as the night progressed. I sat when I was tired and with Esme running around the kitchen, I could actually relax without feeling overwhelmed. With the big things out of the way, I could focus on the smaller details that would really make the meal from the confines of my stool.

Fresh rolls were being made by Esme and Alice was our designated wine opener. Currently, I was baking garlic for the mashed potato's and the butter. I took the tray of meat and shrimp out for the boys to grill. They were all huddled around the grill laughing and slapping Edwards back as he blushed over something.

"I hate to interrupt, but the meat is ready for the grill guys." All their heads turned in my direction and Edward came to me, instantly. He grabbed the tray and handed it to Carlisle before wrapping me in a hug and kissing me lovingly. Yes, I could definitely get used to this.

If this was to be my life from now until forever, I would happily take the trade.

******************************

**EPOV**

Dinner had ended and the kitchen was clean. I had sent Bella up to shower, while I finished the dishes and locked up down stairs. With the final dish in place and the sink free of any mess, I took one last look around our home and headed up to Bella.

The shower was still going when I stepped into the room, so I went straight to the bathroom to join Bella, but when I walked in, I saw her sitting on the bench with a small scowl on her face.

I went to her immediately and dropped down to see her face more clearly. She was obviously in pain, but what from, I had no clue.

"Bella, baby...are you okay?" She just nodded her head to acknowledge me and then bit her lip.

"I'm fine, just some Braxton hicks is all. It will pass; just give me a moment,"

Contractions. My eyes lit up at the events unraveling before me and I couldn't help the excitement building in my chest. As excited as I was, I felt helpless. One look at Bella's face had me feeling useless all over again. I wanted to do more for her than just kneel here and watch her strain for comfort.

I snapped in to Doctor mode because it was the only thing I could think to make myself useful.

"How long have you been having these, love?"

She looked at me with a small smile on her lips and mumbled, "Since around four...they weren't like this though, they just started picking up a bit within the last hour or so."

I took a deep breath and the smile I wore all day was back in place. I sat with her while her contraction died down and then helped her into the shower.

When we were both in, I kept her firmly in place with me and then gave her some guidance on what we needed to be ready for.

"Love, when another one starts, let me know. I'll time them to see how far apart they are, but you know that this could very well turn into a long drawn out process...either way love, its beginning."

Bella laughed a happy laugh and kissed my chest before washing her hair and body. I helped her with the major things, but for the most part, it was a quick shower.

When she was all clean and ready to step out, another started. Bella got my attention by bringing my hand to her stomach and I could feel the tightness beneath my fingers. They were strong and it confirmed my suspicion that Bella was indeed in labor.

She dressed and hopped in bed; I rubbed her back and kissed her head repeatedly while she relaxed for a bit. Outside I was calm and collected, but inside I was jumping with excitement. Bella's contractions were about fifteen minutes apart at this point, so we had plenty of time before we needed to leave or do anything major.

As soon as she was comfortable and reading her book quietly, I got up from the bed and double checked to make sure everything we needed was ready to go. Bella's overnight bag was ready and sitting in the closet, so I grabbed it and did a quick run through just to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything she may want.

After I was satisfied with that, I headed to the nursery and double checked to make sure it was ready for Elizabeth or Emma...we still needed to decide that one as well. I had just walked into the closet and then realization dawned on me, we hadn't had a baby shower. Shit!

My mother and Alice were supposed to host a surprise shower for Bella with the rest of my family at their home, next Saturday. Apparently, we weren't going to make it that far. I grabbed my cell and dialed Alice . If there was one thing I could count on, it was that Alice would not let me down on this request.

The phone rang and she picked up on the second round.

"Alice, its Edward...I need a big favor."

"Okay...shoot."

"Well, it looks as if Bella isn't going to make it to this coming weekend...she's in early labor. However, we don't have a lot of clothes for the baby. Do you think you cou..."

She cut me off before I could even ask. I just heard a squeal and clapping, I think I even heard Jasper say an "Ow."

"Absolutely! Don't worry about a thing! I'll start right now...um...I can have things shipped here and then tomorrow when the stores open, I'll grab things then too! Oh god! This is so exciting! Give Bella a hug and take good care of her Edward!"

I didn't even get a chance to speak again, she hung up and that was it.

I rolled my eyes, but at the same time was grateful for Alice 's support and temporarily even more grateful for her addiction to shopping. I took a moment to look around the room and smiled at how nice it had all turned out. I went to the crib and the empty site made me chuckle.

"She'll be home soon." I said to myself.

*******************************************

Around two o'clock in the morning, Bella woke up. I had dozed around ten, but when she shifted in the bed I was wide awake. She took a deep breath, but didn't say a word; I turned the light on dim and took in her face.

She was biting her lip and her eyes were tense.

"A little stronger now, love?" She nodded her head and then added, "My back hurts too..."

That was enough for me. I kissed her forehead and wrapped her in a hug briefly before I got up to get dressed. Bella just laid in bed after the contraction died down and watched me move around the room gathering her things.

When I finally returned to her side, she whispered my name and a soft I love you, then got up and went to change. I walked with her into her closet and we grabbed her favorite jeans and sweater wrap. The night air was chilled, despite the unseasonably warm weather we had in the day, so instead of getting her sandals or slides, she opted for her camel Ugg's. She threw her hair up in a messy bun and I walked with her slowly down the stairs.

When we were loaded up and ready to head to the hospital, Bella turned to me and asked if we should call my parents. I hadn't done it yet because I didn't know how Bella would feel with having them there for the birth, but when she said it, I felt stupid. Of course she would want them there...they were her family now too.

When we got to the hospital, I had Bella checked in and off to her private room in record time. Being a Cullen here had its privileges. Also, the fact that my father had called ahead when I'd spoken to him twenty minutes ago and had them on stand by awaiting Bella's arrival could have had something to do with it.

Once she was settled and resting in her bed, I finally let the emotions overtake me. I looked at Bella laying there with our baby still nestled in her belly and preparing to enter this world and it took my breath away. I knew I would never be able to really tell Bella how much she meant to me, I also knew that anything I bought or did for her would never hold a candle to the gift she was giving me.

But, I would try very hard every day to let her know how much it meant to me. That was all I could do now, so by her side I sat and held her hand and whispered my love to her as she endured the pain of life...for me...for us.

_________________________________________________________________________

**BPOV**

Okay, so there were about two things going through my head at this point. One, was that I really, really didn't want to do this again, and the other was that I really, really didn't want the pain to get worse. But naturally, it did.

It had been seven hours so far. Seven hours of gradual pain, then intense pain. My body felt like it was going to split in two and it felt like it was already beginning to do so.

Edward was wonderful, he stayed by my side and monitored my contractions as they would hit me, each time holding my hand and breathing along with me. He would wipe my head and give me water as my energy would fade. We had talked about epidurals and even demoral when we started breathing class, but with all the new research on Autism and other things making appearances in today's kids, we didn't want to unless it was absolutely necessary.

I felt kind of dumb now, because I wanted it to stop...to just really stop and be over. However, I was barely five centimeters dilated; only the half way mark. So, I sucked it up and dealt with it because at least I would have my daughter to show for it.

Dr. Gershwire was attending tonight and I think that was in part to Carlisle . My doctor was out at a seminar currently and had his protégé taking his deliveries. However, the guy was about Edwards's age and when Edward had seen that, he demanded that we have someone more experienced.

Hence, Barry... I had taken to calling him such as the morning progressed. It was about ten o'clock now, and Carlisle and Esme had been sitting in there with us for about five hours now. Everyone was calling him Barry, so I hopped on the train as well. He didn't seem to mind, he actually looked as if he preferred it.

Contractions progressed and so did my discomfort. I had stopped breathing all together at one point and had taken to biting Edwards knuckles. I instantly felt like crap afterward because he needed those hands for surgery. He never complained though, he actually looked as pained as I did. Although, I knew it was impossible for him to understand or even comprehend the amount of pain I was actually in, I appreciated that he wasn't giving me lines of crap about how it was all a mental thing...because if he had, I would have broken his neck right then and there.

When three o'clock rolled around and I was only six centimeters dilated, Paul showed up. He had with him a huge teddy bear and pink balloons as well as a card for me and Edward.

"Hey Bella, how you feeling sweetie? Wait stupid question....your trying to squeeze something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a lemon...I can take a good gander at what your feeling, never mind."

I just rolled my eyes and tried to stifle my laugh, I had it in my head that if I didn't move my contractions wouldn't come. Stupid yes, but hopeful and naive I was. Paul sat with Edward and I for about an hour until his eyes became frightened and his face cringed at the site before him. My contractions just kept coming harder and harder and with nothing to sate me but music and breathing; I was about as comfortable as sitting on cactus.

The nurse came back in to check my progress and Paul took that opportunity to excuse himself and leave. The nurse looked up smiling and said, "You're at nine centimeters."

Edward popped up from his seat while still holding my hand and took a deep breath. He kissed my head and held my face, "Okay love, this is it, your about to have our baby, love."

My head was swimming at this point, everything happened so fast from there and I felt like I was watching time speed up. Suddenly, two nurses came and broke down my bed; Doctor Gerswhire had entered the room and was getting his gown on. Edward toweled my head off and helped me into a more comfortable position and the nurses who had been prepping my bed were now encouraging me to practice pushing.

I was scared and confused, but then I met Edwards eyes, he gave me the strength I needed to get through this. He kissed my head one more time and whispered into my ear, "You can do this baby, just one step at a time. I'm here, I'm with you love, let's have our daughter with us now."

I took a deep breath and began.

At precisely 4:16pm , on April the 11th, Emma Cullen was born. When I had pushed for the final time and had only enough strength to breath, I heard her cry.

Edwards took a deep breath and breathed out very low, "Oh Bella...." They placed her gently over my stomach and Edward helped cradle her in my arms. It was the most precious moment of my life. She was here, our daughter was here.

She had brown hair, but tints of copper like Edwards. I giggled a little at that because it made her more unique and beautiful. I only hoped she would get his green eyes too.

Tears were silently dropping from my eyes and all the pain and frustration of the day had melted away. None of it mattered anymore; the only thing that remained was this moment in front of me. I held my daughter with my future husband at my side and all that had seemed great before, failed in comparison to this felling inside me right now.

I glanced over to Edward and his eyes were shining tears as well. He whispered to Emma just before they took her from us, "I love you, Emma...so much. I love you".

_________________________________________________________________________

**EPOV**

Emma Cullen, my daughter. I was a father now...I would be responsible for a life outside of my own, for the rest of my life. It felt great.

I had everything I had ever wanted and now things I didn't even know I could have. Bella had come into my world and turned it upside down and I couldn't have been happier.

My parents had stayed with us until Emma was settled and Bella was looked over thoroughly, but left to give us some space before returning the next day to enjoy their granddaughter.

After the birth, Bella breast fed Emma for the first time hours later, but beside that not much exciting happened, Bella was monitored and stayed over night and was released to go home.

Alice had dropped off a diaper bag of clothes for Emma and even a post baby outfit for Bella. I don't know how she did it, but Alice got Bella's size spot on and it made Bella feel good that she was able to fit into a descent size just after birth.

With Bella and Emma ready, I headed down stairs quickly to pull the car around and get them inside. Alice and Jas stayed with them out front until I was able to get there and load my girls in.

The Mercedes was already set with the base of the car seat and tethered down firmly, all we needed to do was snap in the carrier and Emma was set. Bella had quite a few stitches so getting her loaded in was a delicate job, but the seats were comfortable and she was able to relax for the ride home.

My family decided to stay away for a day or two, so not to overwhelm Bella and I, besides we wanted to enjoy our new family alone for just a small while before the realities of life came barreling down on us.

I was glad that we did too because once we got home, the peace and tranquility of our house really set in. My mother had done a wonderful job working the pieces Bella had selected in the house and it had felt even more inviting than before. I guess everything changes in your eyes when you become a parent, but what all seemed so nice before, suddenly felt perfect.

Between the two hour feedings and the diaper changes, our lives were surely changed. However, you wouldn't ever catch one of us complaining or even sulking. We were happy to do these things for our daughter and even happier to say, our daughter.

The fourth night home, I awoke to an empty bed. I looked over to the video monitor beside Bella's night stand and saw the nursery was empty as well. I tried not to panic, but my nerves got the best of me anyway. I hurried down the hall and walked into a still empty nursery. I felt a soft air kick in the room and the curtains fluttered.

The balcony to the nursery was open; I didn't want to disturb Emma's sleep, so I made my way out there quietly, in case they were there.

Sure enough, Bella was sitting on her rocking chair with Emma bundled in her warm blanket drinking from her breast. I smiled gently and walked toward them, she looked so gorgeous sitting out there in the moon light, rocking our daughter and humming a tune.

I didn't want to startle her, so I called her name very gently with audible steps. She just smiled and rested her head against the chairs back while watching me come to her. My heart gave a quick squeeze and I picked up speed, I just wanted to kiss her. So I did.

I looked down to Emma and stroked her hair gently while she continued to feed. Her little fist rested next to her cheek and her eyes were closed. I could see she was almost asleep again, but every now and then she would go back to suckling fast. I laughed a little at that and pulled up a patio chair from the set we had bought for out here and settled next to Bella.

She kissed my head as I rested it on her chest to watch Emma and then asked, "Why did you get up? You should be resting, baby...you have a surgery tomorrow."

I knew that I should be sleeping, but I couldn't pull myself away from either of them. I just sat with my loves and waited until Emma was sound asleep and back in her crib. Then helped Bella back into bed and held her close to me while we both fell back into sleep.

I hadn't taken time off of work after Emma was born; I was off at the time she arrived. So when I called work, they gave me an option of time off, or stay on, but with a light surgery schedule. I took the light schedule and saved my vacation time for my family.

Bella had encouraged me to just work, insisting that she was fine with Emma alone. I had no doubt that was true, but I didn't want to be gone all the time while Bella did everything herself. My mother and father gave their advice to both of us, and we listened. After all, they had done this already, twice!

Not just the having children part, but the balance part as well. Dad was in exactly my position when I was born and mom was in Bella's.

Dad suggested that I keep the light schedule and then work a new arrangement with the chief to keep me on rotation, however, not weekly, but monthly. That way I was able to have acclimation and balance with home and work. This would ensure Bella had heads up to any conflicts we might have with appointments and other things.

Bella on the other hand, had dropped her writing from weekly to bi-weekly. When it was time for her to submit a piece, I would have Emma for the day to give her the space and time she needed. Bella would pump breast milk for me and I would be able to do everything she did, without disturbing her.

All in all, we had made our lives flow together to create what needed to be done for us all.

Emma on the other hand was the center of the Cullen family's universe and it seemed as if that was the way it would stay. Between Alice, Jas and my parents, that little girl wouldn't know what life was without having a gift presented to her at everyone's arrival.

Our once bare nursery was no more, Alice had filled Emma's closet with dresses and outfits galore. I had never seen so much pink in all my life. My parents evened that out though, they were always bringing an array of colors by for her and at the end of the day, Bella and I had dressers and the closet filled completely.

These days, our house was the gathering place. Everyone understood that we liked having Emma in her own room and surrounded by her own things, so no one fussed or complained. Even though our house was about fifteen minutes further than mom and dads.

Every Sunday, we had a family dinner and enjoyed each others company. Paul had taken to joining us as well and served as our comedy relief. He adored Emma and was always smiling when we would catch him admiring her. He looked over to Bella and I once and chuckled. "I hope you know how to shoot a gun Edward...cause you're gonna need it!"

That I knew.

What it came down to at the end of the day was that we had all found our peace. It was hard for me to remember a time when I didn't have Bella in my life, now, I knew it had existed and that there were almost thirty years that I lived without her, but it all felt like a distant thought now.

I cherished the life I had been given and every night before I closed my eyes, I kissed Bella with passion and held her to my body while saying a silent thank you that she had forgiven me my faults. They were faults that would have cost me an entire life of love and happiness, but as it were, I was given a second chance.

Sometimes we're not all that lucky. Bella could have turned me away from her door that day I went to her, she could have left me standing there with daisies and never spoken to me again, but as it was, we conceived our daughter that night and because of her love and forgiveness, I was able to spend my life making her happy.


	32. Chapter 32

Song for this chapter is **_Everlong- The foo fighters._**

**_ Everlong- Vitamin String Quartet_**

I hope this chapter is up to par...I really did try. I have one request from a reader for the epilogue, and I will make sure it is granted! Everyone who has read or will read...thank you. I had a lot of fun doing this story, and on the flip side I was able to brush up on my imagination ;)

I gave my Beta Tina(rangernstephfan) a small cameo as well, she has been absolutely amazing in this process and it wouldnt have been right to not have her in this as well.

**The Dress: http://www(dot)priscillaofboston(dot)com/dress_detail(dot)jsp?gid=200&sfid=343&f=**

* * *

**BPOV (Everlong)**

I was sitting on the nursery balcony with Emma resting in my arms and drinking from my breast. She was two months old today.

That thought had me looking back to my life over the last eight weeks. It felt like Emma had just been born days before and that I was still in this dream state that was pleasant, warm and happy.

Every morning I woke up, sometimes various times in the night for a feed, and just walked around the house to admire its beauty. I couldn't believe this was my life.

My kitchen was breathtaking; my living room warm and comfortable, our entire house was something akin to a photo in Modern Homes. On top of all the material things that surrounded me, there was Edward. He was my love, my fiancé...my world

I would have happily traded it all in just to ensure that he was with me forever, but as it were, he gave me a ring and his word that he always would be. I didn't question it, I had no reason to, his words and actions each day were always sincere.

Every day he would make his way home and would cuddle up with Emma and I on our over sized couch. He would snuggle Emma to his chest and hold me to his side and we would lay quietly together before sitting down for dinner and talking about our day.

Emma joined us for meals even though she was still too small for a high chair, Edward would place her in the bassinet between our seats and gently stroke her hair, cheeks and toes as we ate our meals and laughed about my daily adventures with our daughter.

It was all just so wonderful, everything was peaceful. I didn't know things could ever be that way. _My youth _was spent in a series of not so good moments. I can still remember being about five years old and sitting at the dinner table with my mother and father and having a pit in my stomach from the tension that was always blanketing us. There was no laughter, no jokes or touches of love and adoration. To my father I was a sore reminder about why he was still with my mother, and soon after when my mother had left, I was a nuisance to her plans for a free life.

Edward on the other hand showed nothing but pure happiness when he walked in the door each day to Emma and I. Even when he had a surgery go bad and someone was now gone from the earth, he left that at work and put his best face forward to greet the two of us girls when he walked in.

Our life was good...great actually, and after the first month of uninterrupted bliss, I stopped waiting for the other shoe to drop. Beside the happiness, a lot had happened over the last two months. Edward and I had began planning our wedding and organizing details over what we wanted.

The one thing that we did agree on, was that we wanted it to be small and intimate. My sole purpose behind that was that I didn't have any family to speak of. I did, but none that I was on speaking terms with.

Outside of Paul and my grandmothers friend Donna, I wouldn't have much of a showing on my side of a traditional aisle. I didn't want to even consider the repercussions of looking up my parents at this point, first off, my father had the resources to find me, and never so much as tried to know if I was still alive as far as I had known. And my mother, well, after I had said my peace, she fell off the face of the planet. I was fine with this realisation and had no desire to go drugging up the past.

We were due to say our _I do's_ in just one short month, and to our relief, Alice had taken over the mass of details that would need to be seen to.

After a firm talking to and an iron clad promise from her, our wedding was fully in her hands. The only thing I was needed for, was fittings, cake tasting and music requests. All my other time however was promised to my family.

Thursday through Saturday were ours to spend with Edward, as long as no one required any emergency surgery, he was ours the entire time.

We had spent a great deal of our new acquired time going out for runs and walks in the park. Some days we would simply go over to his parents house for the day and relax with everyone while they spoiled Emma rotten with dolls, clothes, and baby Einstein movies.

Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights I would go to the gym by myself while Edward and Emma had some daddy/daughter time alone and I got to focus on losing the last twelve pounds I had gained while pregnant. My wedding dress was sized to my pre-baby body and come hell or high water, I was going to fit it! I had even broken down and asked Edward if I could get a personal trainer.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I faintly heard my name being called. I got up with Emma in my arms and righted my exposed upper half before walking down the stairs and patting her back gently to get her burped.

When I reached the middle of the stairs, my smile erupted and my breath hitched. It was Edward. I had known it was him, but seeing him always seemed to make me stop and appreciate that it was _me _he was coming home to.

He was home from the hospital early, and still wearing scrubs and holding daisies. That image never got old. He had just put down his things and his head popped up and his eyes met my gaze. His smile rivaled my own and before I could speak, he was in front of me and holding Emma and I gently to his chest. My breath came out in a relaxed huff and then he pulled back to kiss me.

I could of gone on that way for a long while, but we were interrupted by Emma's high pitched squeal. She sounded like she wanted to laugh, but it came out garbled and high instead. Edward and I pulled back at the same time and laughed. She was sitting up in my arms and wobbling unsteadily as she tried to keep her posture. Her full head of hair leaning from side to side while still gurgling.

Edward kissed my lips one last time and handed me my daisies before taking Emma and settling her into the same position I had her and resumed patting her back to burp her.

"These are for you love."

I watched him with Emma for a long moment, he was an amazing father. His life revolved around our small life we had created and it was evident in the way he admired her and crooned to her. I looked a second longer and then thanked him and went to put my flowers in water. My daisies from last week were beginning to wilt, so I pulled the petals that were still good and placed them in a small zip lock bag so I could scrap book them later. My new daisies adorned the vase in their place and I placed them on the window seal at my kitchen window.

Edward had followed me in and was talking to Emma while I made my way around and pulled the chicken from the refrigerator that I had set there this morning to defrost.

"_Your home early, baby. I'm sorry I haven't started dinner yet, I was just relaxing while I fed Emma earlier and..."_

He cut me off and said, "Bella, stop. You don't have to explain anything love, I just wanted to surprise you. I know you like to have dinner waiting, and I appreciate it...but I don't expect or require it love."

I just smiled and winked at him. He was right, I did it because I liked having a routine to depend on. I liked that the house was my domain, and I kept it running smoothly.

I had never truly appreciated the amount of work a stay at home mother actually did, and now experiencing it, I understood that it was a job highly underestimated by the masses. It was by no means easy, aside from feeding, changing and bathing Emma for the day, I still needed to clean, wash, and grocery shop. Doctor appointments needed to be scheduled and then dinner needed to be made.

I wasn't complaining, I knew that I had it a world better than a lot of women in my position. My fiance had a wonderful job, a high paying salary and undying love for me and our daughter. There wasn't anything I could think of that Edward wouldn't do for us.

Like once, I had mentioned in passing, how nice it would be to just grocery shop on line and have things delivered. It was a comment made after two nights of straight crying from Emma and an entire day of running errands. It was nothing more than a complaint made from a tired mother. However the next day, I couldn't find my grocery list and as I sat down to write another one, there was a knock at the door. A young woman from _August Grocery Store _was standing on our porch with bags in her hands and in a small metal carry cart. I helped her bring them in and she explained how Edward had come in and set up a charge account and carry out service for us.

I had no idea they even had things like that anymore. But low and behold, the girl named Carrie just handed me a receipt and went along her way.

When he had come home that day he was all smiles as I questioned him about the grocery drop.

"You don't have to use it all the time love, just when you really don't want to go in person. However you can use it all the time if you want, either way, just as long as you are happy."

I snapped out of the memory when I felt Edward come up behind me and kiss my neck. Chills ran through my body and I bit my lip trying to stifle my moan. Then I felt Edwards arms around my body fully and I leaned back into him.

_"Wh-Wheres Emma?" _I asked in a whisper.

He just continued dropping kisses over my neck and shoulders while mouthing, "In her swing" against my skin.

_"Oh god, Edward. I miss you, baby...I need you so much." I said into the air around us._

"I know, baby. I feel the same way...maybe tonight..." He trailed off.

I turned fully in his arms and embraced his lips fully with my own. We hadn't really done much in the last two weeks, my doctor had cleared us for sex, but between my sleepless nights and his long hours, we usually fell asleep before we could get started.

Tonight however, I had other plans. I had finally taken Esme up on her offer to stay with Emma for a couple of hours, and had gotten a black negligee from _La Perla. _I had it hidden in the bottom of Emma's dresser, and after she was down for the night, I was going to slip it on and enter the room to surprise him.

I didn't answer his suggestive trailing, and just smirked when I pulled away. I didn't want to give anything away at this point, so I kept my mouth shut and went back to the chicken. He breathed in deep and then dropped a kiss to the top of my head before grabbing a bottle of wine to open and sitting across from me with a smile and two empty glasses.

"Would you like a small glass love?"

I smiled at the idea and nodded my head happily. I hadn't had a drink since I found out I was pregnant, and just the thought of having a glass of wine again made me smile. I had milk pumped and ready for Emma in the fridge right now anyway in case I wasn't able to give her the breast tonight.

Our night was easy, just like anyother we would share and laugh at. Edward performed two surgeries today, both extensive and lengthy, but he was relieved by his chief so that he could show an intern how to do the closing. Hence Edwards early arrival.

After dinner we had both gone up stairs to feed Emma on the balcony and listen to music while I rocked her to sleep. It foiled my plan a little, and I had to fabricate a story for Edward to go down stairs while I changed, but sure enough I had gotten him out of the room and down the stairs.

I tucked Emma in her crib, locked up the doors to the balcony and sprinted to the dresser. I ran down the hall as quietly and gracefully as I could muster and locked myself in the bathroom.

I put on the delicate silk fabric and relished the feeling of the material on my skin. I felt sexy, a feeling I hadn't had in almost a year. My body was toned again and thanks to the breast feeding my stomach was flat again. I pulled a brush through my hair and tousled it to give it some volume. I heard Edward enter the room looking for me, so I hurried my process and applied some clear gloss to my lip and shut the lights.

I took one last deep breath and pulled open the handle to enter the room and greet my man.

He was sitting on the bed with his head against the head board and his eyes closed like he was sleeping. However even if he was, he would be waking up, I had gone eight weeks without him and right now I was all about making up for that lost time.

I gently made my way to him and tried to stay as quiet as possible. When I was half way to the bed, I called his name gently and with a hint of passion. His eyes snapped open, and then widened when he took in my appearance.

I met his eyes with what could only be lust, and slowly made my way to the bed. Edward stay there, quietly without words. His eyes were appraising my body and drinking me in greedily as I walked at a slow pace to him. When I reached the bed, I bit my lip and leaned over exposing my vast amount of cleavage.

It was at this point that Edward snapped out of his trance and pulled me over his waist to straddle him. His lips were on my skin now, seeking every bit of flesh that was exposed to him. My breath hitched and held his head closer to my body so he could search more freely.

I felt his arousal stiff beneath my thighs, and maneuvered so I was sitting just above it. When he went to my breasts, I ground my covered center over his thick, long member to give myself and him friction.

This elicited a moan from deep within him, and he sent me flying in the air and onto my back of over our large king bed. Before I could think straight, his hands were seeking out the rest of me while he worked his lips down my body in search of something. I knew he had found it, when I felt his soft, warm lips on my core. He dropped gentle wet kisses that mixed with my current state of arousal, and it sent me nearly into convulsions.

_"Please, Edward...I need you baby...now." I whispered into the air._

I heard a groan and then a desperate intake of breath as I was pulled from my position and facing him.

He kissed me hard and with need for a long moment and then pulled back.

"You look so fucking sexy, Baby. You have me so hard for you...I can barely stand it."

He grabbed my hand and placed his length in my palm. I couldn't help rubbing it with need and desire as I stared into his eyes. He ground his teeth together while I worked him and then dropped his head to my shoulder. I continued on for a moment and then snaked my hand under his pajama pants to feel him fully and without boundaries.

He sucked gently on my neck and then whispered into my ear, "I really don't want to take this off of you, but I'm dying to feel your naked body against my own love..."

I kissed up his neck to his ear and then responded with, _"We can do both."_

He didn't respond with words, he simply pulled up my negligee and yanked my panties down my thighs. His response to me was more than pleasing and I complied with as much fervor. His pants were down his legs faster than the idea had come into my head, and before I could so much as think, I was being pulled down over his length.

I braced my palms against his shoulders as he gently guided me over his body. I knew he was anxious, but he put it all aside to make sure I wasn't uncomfortable with his size or that he wasn't hurting me. Ever so gently my core took him in, inch by delicious inch.

My breath caught in my throat as I felt him filling me whole. I couldn't take it anymore, so I latched onto his lips and kissed him hard while I lowered myself the rest of the way in one smooth motion.

Edward gasped, his body becoming rigid beneath my own. I knew it was just the shock of the warmth and the feel of it all that had surprised him, so I rocked gently over him to show him that I was okay, and that he was okay to let go and enjoy this.

It didnt take him long to come to that decision, He braided his right hand in my hair and his left held my hip to guide my movements steadily over his length and began rocking with me.

Our breathing was labored, and the tight coil building in my stomach had me rocking over him more furiously. I missed this so much, how Edward and I could just make each other feel complete bliss with simply being connected.

"Oh Bella....god...fuck...I'm not...gonnna..oh god! Last baby....I wont last..."

I panted into his ear and whispered to him in passion, _"mmmmm, I don't care, as long as I get to feel you hard in me again....were just warming up, baby."_

That did it, he slapped my bare ass with his hand and pushed me harder over his length with more fervor. I complied and felt him hitting the most delicious spot inside of me.

_" Oh yes, Edward...right there baby, keep rubbing me right there...."_

He sucked in a breath and gave a strangled, "Jesus Bella, fuck!"

He rocked into me three more times, and I went over the edge. My orgasm was so mind blowing and overwhelming, I had to stifle my moans into his shoulder while my body squeezed every inch of his member. Edward gave one last strangled grunt and came inside me, his body shooting off warm spurts while I came down from my high.

We stayed that way for a long moment, neither of us speaking or moving. Finally my breath slowed and Edward showed signs of movement beneath me. I exhaled shakily and moved off of his lap, he didn't let me get very far, he held me to his body while he drew his hands lazily up and down my negligee covered body and dropped kisses to my skin.

"Oh god, Bella. I have missed being with you so much love...thank you...that was...amazing."

I rolled over to face him properly and planted a kiss right to his lips before I threw my leg over his hip and grinned wickedly.

_"This was just a warm up, baby." _

He smirked at my tone and rubbed his hands up my thighs and over my bare bottom.

"Well then, lets get the evening started properly."

****************************************************************************************************************

Our evenings continued on this way, we would put Emma to sleep and then make out like a couple of teenagers in the hall, before Edward would carry me to bed and we would enjoy each other fully.

My love for Edward only grew as the days turned into weeks, our entire relationship was that way. Just when I thought I could love him no more than I did, he would do something romantic or sweet and it would make me fall all over again.

Our wedding was just a day away, we fought Alice on making us stay apart. Edward put his foot down against her, and for the first time since I had known him, he won.

"Alice, I'm not staying the evening away from my _daughter and Bella_ just because you have some silly notion in your head. Bella and I take turns feeding her in the night on my days off, and this is no exception. And before you even try it, NO, Emma is not staying with anyone but us, she is _our _daughter and _we _will be caring for her."

Alice narrowed her eyes and looked at me to see if she could sway me. I just puckered my face like a cabbage patch kid and clasped Edwards hand. She huffed out an aggravated breath and then relented.

"_Fine, what do I care? I was just trying to make your day special."_ she said in an angry tone.

Edward raised his eye brows and brought our joined hands to his lips and kissed mine gently.

"Alice, I get to marry the love of my life tomorrow. You could do nothing to make that anymore special than it already is...so just drop it."

She rolled her eyes and walked away muttering something about traditions and voodoo. I just rolled my eyes and giggled into Edwards arm while he grinned at her frustrations.

He picked me up lifting my feet off the ground to dangle and kissed me fully. When I couldn't breath anymore he pulled away and set me on my feet.

"Tomorrow love, I get to keep you forever...I cant wait."

I nodded my head and let the smile on my face shine with confidence. I held him closer and got on my tip toes to kiss him once more, he met me half way and obliged me my kiss.

The next morning was pure chaos. I spent a good portion of the early morning pumping breast milk for Emma. Carlisle and Esme greeted Edward and I bright and early at their home to take Emma so that we could get ready without disruption. We were getting married at his parents home, and due to the prep schedule Alice had us following, Emma would need to be cared for while I was busy. I had pumped enough milk to last Emma an entire week after the collection I had put together the night before and then this morning.

I didn't particularly enjoy pumping my breasts, but I was paranoid about milk. Esme had talked us into taking a small honey moon, and volunteered herself and Carlisle to watch over Emma for a week. With reluctance, Edward and I both agreed after thinking it over and deciding that we did want to celebrate our marriage with at least some tradition.

I had no idea where we were going, but Esme did. Edward made sure to give her all our information just in case she needed to get a hold of us for something concerning Emma. Esme just laughed and said, "I have done this before Edward, twice actually. Not to mention I live with one of the best Doctors in the state of Illinois. I think we can manage our granddaughter...just relax."

So now here I was, sitting in Alice's old room with my hair in rollers and my face being done up by a tall, leggy brunette with stylish hair and immaculate make up. Her name was Tina and she was absolutely wonderful to me, never once did she try to dictate what I should have done, or push me into a realm of colors. No, she simply had done what I asked, and kept the make up romantic and classic.

It felt as if it were another spa day for me here, I was oddly calm today. Esme had brought Emma up to the room to sit and chat with Alice and I as we had our hair done.

I didn't want anything too dramatic, and certainly didn't want something unrealistic of myself, so I agreed on a classic french twist, with light wisps framing my face. I wanted to fit the evening perfectly, not stick out like a sore thumb. It was the only time in my life I can say I truly cared about looking _perfect._ I wanted to be everything to Edward that he was to me.

Our wedding was by no means large, we had kept to our vision and the numbers were small. Our guest list was around forty people or so, give or take a few, and I had no brides maids or immediate family here with me. I had called Donna, my grandmothers friend, but she was getting up in age, and wasn't able to make the wedding due to some health problems, she felt horrible, but I assured her I would send pictures and do my best to visit her with Emma and Edward.

Even though I had no one from my youth present, I had Paul. He had shown up to the Cullens house already and was hanging out with the boys in the pool house where they were getting ready and relaxing amongst themselves. Knowing that he was here for me made the pain dull that much easier.

The buzz of excitement that I had been blocked from all day was slowly making its way up stairs and every now and then I could hear Edwards jovial laugh and carefree spirit echoing up the stairs. It was only then, that I would get restless and excited to move along. I hated being away from him.

Luckily, it was time to get my dress on now. I stood in my cashmere robe and made my way to the large white garment bag hanging from the closet and Alice unzipped it.

My dress was not white, for obvious reasons. Instead my dress was a very subtle champagne color, just a classic strapless drop-waist Satin gown, with a gathered backing and a bow. It was romantic and soft, all the things I described mine and Edwards relationship to be. It was perfect in my eyes.

Alice helped my into the silk while Esme looked on with Emma in her arms cooing. My nerves never came and the panic I was certain I would have once I stepped into the dress never made an appearance. Instead, my body felt even more relaxed and my heart thrummed along just as calm as it had when my hair was being combed into a french twist.

I stood patiently in front of the window that looked over the wedding site and then off the right to the reception. I could hear the photographer moving around the room quietly, snapping away as I watched people from the window taking their seats and speaking quietly amongst each other as the string quartet warmed up along the side. I watched all this unfold while Alice buttoned my silk dress in place and then secured the loose bow.

"All ready, Bella." she whispered softly while stepping back. I turned to Alice and Esme while they looked at me in awe and smiled warmly. A warm blush flushed my face as I met their amazed expressions. I felt silly for a moment so I went to grab my bouquet from the cooler and then caught my reflection in the mirror.

The reflection that met my eyes was foreign. The woman who looked back at me was confident and beautiful. I always knew that my looks weren't poor, and in no way did I ever feel ugly or undesirable, but right now as I looked myself over, I felt Gorgeous.

I took a deep breath and smiled at myself then turned back to the girls.

_"I'm ready...let's go down stairs now so I can take a walk to my love."_

Alice came to me and wrapped me in a hug while being careful with my hair and face.

"You truly are a vision, Bella..."

Esme walked up with Emma and I kissed my little sweetie and then focused back on Esme. She handed off Emma to Alice and asked her to take her to Carlisle for a moment. Alice obliged and cooed her way out the door with Emma in her arms with a bottle.

Esme grabbed my hands gently and stared at me with a soft smile. Again the sound of a camera clicking somewhere in the room with us had caught my attention, and then I snapped back to Esme.

"Bella, Dear. I know its probably not the same, but in any case, I just wanted to tell you that you are the most beautiful bride I have ever seen." Her breath caught and her eyes glossed over momentarily before she righted herself.

"Now I know I'm not your mother...not yet anyway...but all the same sweetheart, I want you to know a few things before you walk out that door."

I nodded my head and fought against the tears that were aching to leave my eyes. I won the battle but just barely.

"First off, marriage is work. Your lucky, you have a man that is willing to move the sun and the moon for you, he loves you. Truly loves you in every sense of the word. Second, be patient. You may find a time where he is on your last nerve and you can barely stand his presence, if that ever happens, think of the day he proposed. You'll find your resolve in that moment and then all the inconsequentials will melt away. Lastly Bella, be happy."

I bit my lip while the emotions crept up my throat again and nodded. Esme had once again fullfilled a role my mother should have played. In any case, she did it better. I knew that I would be happy forever with Edward, he was essential to my being and my very core. Without him, I would be no more than an empty shell.

She kissed my cheek gently and patted my hand tenderly before turning and walking down stairs to get seated.

Alice came in seconds later and grabbed her bouquet and we descended the stairs together.

When we reached the wide doors leading out to the backyard, Alice turned to me.

"You really do look beautiful Bella. I'll see you in a minute."

She winked and Audrey the violinist who was on edge and waiting for a visual of Alice, began.

We had chosen our music carefully. Our relationship was in no means conventional, and we didn't feel it needed to be when we made our way to our vows. Instead of anything expected, the quartet began a slow and intimate version of _Everlong._

I bit my lip impatiently while I waited for my part in the song to come up, I could only see the quartet in my line of site and the suspense was killing me. I was dying to see the outcome of Alice's hard work.

The sun was setting and the sky was a mix of purple and blue. The reflection of twinkle lights made their way into the house as I stood transfixed on the image reflecting on the marble floor. Just as my part was about to come up, an arm linked with my own and we began to step foreword.

I turned my head to my right and there stood Paul. He was dressed in a tuxedo and groomed to perfection. I had intended to walk myself alone...it was the way I had always walked through my life, the way I celebrated my mile stones. But in that instant, once again I realized that my life had changed. I was no longer alone in this world. My smile widened and together we made our way out the doors and I out to Edward.

When we turned the corner, everyone stood. I tried to take in the beauty of the yard, soft blooms of pink and white echoed through the space before me, but all I could see was Edward. He seemed to stand taller when he met my eyes, and the look of love and warmth emanating from him had me bracing myself and straining not to run down the aisle toward him.

He was beyond handsome, his dark tuxedo paired with a dress tie, his copper hair tamed and sexy. Yes, I was ready to be his wife.

Just as Paul and I had reached Edward, the music gently died down and then the only sound was of the preacher in front of us asking who gives this woman.

I vaguely heard Paul's response, all I could focus on was Edwards face and the way his hand confidently reached out to take my arm from Paul's. I didn't waste time and joined our hands as we made our way up together to speak our vows.


	33. The End

**If you have read, but not reviewed**, I would really like to know what you thought of the story. The end was hard to write, but I want to know if it was enjoyed...thanks

This is it...the end. I have truly enjoyed writing this story. To my loyal reviewers and readers, Thank you! I loved reading all the ways you smiled, laughed and cried.

Tina, You were a god send! Thank you so much for everything. I didn't send this for Beta, because I wanted you to have the surprise too. Again, if you ever need help in return, just ask!

Enjoy the end....

* * *

**BPOV (Two Years Later)**

I could hear the faint sound of giggles and sighs from just down the hall. I was lying in bed with an achy body and throbbing headache. The flu had made a special guest appearance in my life and was doing its best to stay for an extended visit.

I lay silently looking up at the roof and admiring the crown molding that adorned the edges while listening to Edward get Emma ready for her dance class. I tried not to laugh at the fact that Emma was completely in control of him, or the fact that she made more sense than him when he tried to argue, but I failed.

I pulled myself up and cringed from the pain I felt in my abs and legs. This was no ordinary flu, it was death by slow and painful torture. I pushed past it and placed my feet inside my slippers and wrapped my pink cashmere robe around my body. I stepped out into the hall and made my way down two doors to Emma's room.

I peeked inside and saw Edward walking around aimlessly with her bag, opening and closing drawers in search of something. I leaned against the door carefully and then waited for my body to adjust to the cool temperature of the wood on my face before I spoke.

"_Is everything okay, Edward?"_

He turned his body quickly and his eyes went wide as he made his way to my side, forgetting all about the mad hunt he was just on. When he reached me, he snuggled my body tighter into the robe and felt my head while speaking in a flustered tone.

"Love, what are you doing out of bed? Go back and rest, sweetheart. You need to rest if you want to get better..."

I just nodded my head and wrapped my nose and mouth in my robe before speaking.

"_Just let me help you in here, and then I'll go back to bed okay? _

He huffed and gave me a hard look, but it melted when I moved a little and cringed my face. Instantly he was trying to comfort me again. I pushed off the wall slowly and walked into the room and saw Emma sitting on her bed with only a leotard and tights on.

Edward must have been searching for her pants and dance shoes. I made sure to keep my face covered as I went to her and stood my her side.

Emma didn't see me at first, and then she did. She jumped up and wrapped her arms around me while exclaiming, "Momma, Momma!" I couldn't help the smile that burst over my face at her happiness. I patted her back and sat her back to get her attention.

"_Sweetie, what wild goose chase do you have your dad on?" _She blushed a little and then smiled wide before whispering into my ear, "_he's looking for my shoes and bottoms."_

I rolled my eyes at her confession and then looked quickly over to Edward. He had taken up residency at the door frame where I had just been, and his face was warm and indulgent as he looked over at the two of us.

I often found him doing things like that, he would admire Emma and I when we simply sat on the couch together and watched a cartoon, or when she helped in the kitchen with cookies and sweets. Edward was always around us, always admiring the way we interacted as mother and daughter. I would blush often at the amount of attention he bestowed upon me, but I could never deny that I loved every second of it.

I winked in his direction and he smiled wider to me as he watched me go into her closet and pull out a second bag that matched the one he had in his hands. I raised my eyebrows at him in challenge and then unzipped the pink cluster and pulled out the rest of her things.

Edwards mouth dropped a little and then a smile erupted over his shocked expression. We both started laughing at the mix up, and then he came to my side. I ducked my head and covered up more securely as he embraced me in his arms.

I muffled out an explanation to him from under the robe. " _That bag has new things in it for performances...this is her practice bag." _I explained to him while holding it up.

I felt him shaking with a small laugh as he held me to him.

"Of course there's another bag." He mumbled while smiling, "Emma said something to that effect and I didn't listen."

He pulled back a small ways and spoke to Emma with a bit of embarrassment in his tone.

"Did I, sweet pea." I turned my head and looked to Emma who had her face bunched up in a matter of fact way as she responded to her fathers statement.

"_Nope. You diwn't listen daddy." _Then she released a big huff of air from her lungs and her cheeks were puffy.

Edward kissed my head and released me and went to Emma quickly. He scooped her off the bed and hugged her body to his as he spun around with a tight embrace.

"Daddy needs to listen more, doesn't he, Sweet pea?" he said while spinning her.

Emma was in a fit of giggles as she swung around securely in Edwards arms and then nodded with a gurgled , _yes._

I laughed a little to myself and then wished Emma a good day at practice. I was just turning to leave when I was gently scooped up into Edwards arms and being carried back to our bed.

He gently placed me on my side and covered me up before taking the trash bag out and loading a new one. I watched as he made his way to the bathroom and back with a new box of tissue. He always took such good care of me.

I saw Emma walking around and gathering her dolls that were scattered about the room from when she played in here earlier while Edward had showered. Emma was a neat freak just like myself and the gift of clean up time was one we never had to instill with her, she always just did it.

When Emma had left the room to take her dolls _home, _Edward stepped to my side.

"Rest, love. I'll be back soon. I'm going to wait with Emma while she practices and then Jasper and Alice are taking her for the weekend. I'll be here to take better care of you, love."

I smiled at that and then nodded my head. I heard Emma calling for her Daddy just down the hall that she was ready to leave.

I winked at his torn expression and swatted his butt. "_Go, I'll be fine."_

With that, Edward got up and walked out of the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.

**EPOV**

I pulled my self away from Bella and focused my attention on Emma. She was the light in my life, my compass for all things that needed to be accomplished. Everything I did in this life was for the two girls that occupied my heart.

I _loved_ being a father. Actually...I loved being a Daddy. My little girl loved me, truly loved me and depended on me. I was wrapped around her little finger the second we found out that she was a _she._

We were lucky, Bella and I. As much as we loved Emma, and worked to give her nice things, she was un-materialistic. She got that from Bella.

I would often take her into the toy section whenever we ran errands or picked up odds and ends for the house, but many times she would deny me the joy of getting her a new doll or even a new outfit. I didn't want to necessarily spoil her rotten, but I did want to _spoil her._

I credit all of her selflessness to Bella though. I wish I could say that it was a joint effort from the both of us, but the truth of the matter is that Bella was with Emma more.

She had stayed on with the political site for about ten months after Emma was born. Our schedules with parenting Emma worked out, but one day I found Bella in her office with tears running down her face.

I had just walked in to give her some coffee and a snack, but what I found there that day broke my heart.

Emma was napping in her crib, so I pulled Bella in my arms and we sat on the couch right there in her office.

She wasn't sobbing, or even really sad, she said that she was tired. My heat instantly broke at the thought that I wasn't helping her enough. Word vomit was coming out of my mouth as I tried to think of ways to be around more. Half way through my rant, she finally got me to stop, and held my face in her hands. She spoke softly and without tears anymore. She was trying to comfort _me._

"_Love, that's not it. I'm not tired from being a mother, I'm tired of writing about things I could care less about."_

It clicked then. She just needed me to listen to her and be there for her. I tried to jam that in my head to remember next time, and then silently berated myself in my head. I began hoping that she wouldn't feel that way ever again.

I shut my mouth and listened to her confess her hearts desires to me. She had began writing books she said. More over, _Childrens' books._

I sat quietly as she had explained that she had gotten the idea from when she would talk to Emma while she nursed her. She said that stories would just come to mind and she would get carried away and before she knew it, they were consuming her thoughts.

"_At first I just wanted to write them down to have for Emma when she grew up, but the more I wrote, the more the stories would just come to life. I have three completed so far..."_

That day, Bella also confessed that she had wanted to stop working for the time being and just write for herself. I agreed wholeheartedly. Not because I wanted to be the big provider, no, that was just a small part of it.

The majority of it, was that I wanted her to be happy. Often times when it was time for her to write, I would see the longing in her face as she handed Emma over for an extended period of time. She would give me the same look as she closed her office and wrote for hours at a time.

She _missed _us, Emma and I both. I would be lying if I said that we didn't miss her too, because in truth, I hated being away from either of them for any reason, especially work.

Being free from her job changed Bella considerably. She laughed more, smiled more and when I got home from work, music was on instead of CSPAN. She was free to be happy now, and the fact that I could provide her a life in which that was her reality made me happy too.

With all her free time after that, Bella became involved in a lot of charities. This is where Emma's humanity came into play. At a very young age, Emma saw her mother volunteering and helping other that were far less fortunate. New clothes, shoes, even dolls were something Emma had to earn with Bella.

Emma never seemed to mind either, when she was one, she would help Bella load large Tupperware's with donations and food. Yes, Bella was the role model that Emma had looked up to and learned her kindness from.

I often felt at times that I had won the lottery with Bella. She was everything I could have ever hoped for in a soul mate, she got me. She had me from the moment I first touched her arm at dinner years ago.

* * *

About a month had gone by in the blink of an eye, Bella was over her flu and my mediocre parenting was replaced with the _master_. Bella would always laugh when I told her that and then immediately she would assure me that I was an amazing father.

I was a good parent, I knew that. But I also knew that I was nothing like Bella. She kept our home running smoothly and juggled our family's schedule with grace and perfection. She was my rock, my partner, my everything.

I never worried when it came to Bella being able to do something. If she was handed a task from the numerous charities she was involved in, things were carried out to a T. Emma was in the same category, Bella knew every cut, every date and every thing that happened in that little girls life. She could probably tell you the name and social of any person that administered her immunizations as well. Bella was _Super Mom._

Tonight Emma was having a sleep over at my parents house. We didn't really like having her gone from us, but after listening to begging and pleading from both my mother _and _my father, we caved.

Emma would go with either my parents or Alice and Jas when either Bella and I were sick. We wanted to keep her free from the pain of a flu and even a cold if we could. But this would be Emma's first real over night just for fun.

Bella and I had taken her over tonight and had an early dinner with mom and dad. I helped my father clear dishes as Mom and Bella talked over coffee, and when I entered the kitchen, I saw bags of candy and some new dress up things sitting on the counter.

My dad thought he was slick and tried to hide them before I saw, but I was faster. I snatched the bag from his hands and laughed as I pulled out tiny plastic heels, fake makeup and costumed dresses.

My dad did his best to stand his ground and squared his shoulders before speaking. "What? I can't make sure my granddaughter has things to play with so she wont be bored?"

I laughed harder at his defense. Emma was more than happy with her Happy Feet movie and her stuffed Mumble doll. She didn't need the works to keep her entertained. Actually, most of her joy came from just being with my mom and dad in the yard while playing. She was a god send and every parents dream. Course... I could be biased.

We finished up and then Bella and I wished Emma a good night and headed home. This was our first time alone together that neither of us was sick. It had hit me as we were driving and reached the garage.

There was no soup to make, or laundry to help finish. Medicine didn't need to be administered and nothing needed to be sanitized. A smile had already erupted over my face as I put the car in park.

Bella glanced over to me and winked at my expression. My smile was now gone and desire was making its way over my body.

We had the house to ourselves...There was nobody down the hall to be quiet for, and no closets to be checked for monsters. I had my wife _all to myself _this weekend.

I tried to tame myself as we made our way in, I didn't want to scare the hell out of Bella and make her afraid to be in bed with me. I took a deep breath and calmed myself before I got out of the car. Bella was waiting at the door to the house for me to join her, and I paced myself to make it look nonchalant. On the outside I hoped I looked calm and collected, cause on the inside I was a raging ball of horny and my wife was just too delectable to deny.

I placed the keys on the hook, and followed Bella up the stairs to our room. Once inside, Bella excused herself to tidy up for bed. We had a joined bathroom and two sinks to accommodate both of us.

I brushed up and then went out into the room, leaving Bella to finish up in there alone. She hated an audience.

I knew the ritual, she would wash her face, brush her teeth and then dress in one of my shirts that she rotated out of my wardrobe.

Even after all this time, she still liked to wear my shirt to bed, and every time a new one had made it into rotation, I would take her in it just like the first. Only difference was that we couldn't scream or even be as loud as we once were. The control we had to use when we made love was almost torture in itself. I ached to be able to shout her name as I came in her soft body, and many nights I would be left with bite marks on random parts of my body, from Bella holding back as well.

I felt my self go stiff just thinking about taking her, and I stripped down into nothing and got under the covers.

_Ahhh _I thought to myself. _No clothes! _

I had taken to wearing pajama pants these days, because many times in the week, Emma would wake and want to get in bed with us. My days of sleeping in the nude were now gone, and for just this small window of time, I got to be _free_ once more.

I heard the faucet turn off and knew that Bella was almost done. Excitement crept into my body as well as lust. I needed her so badly now and I had to prepare myself to last. I wanted this evening to last as long as possible. I wanted to show her over and over again just how much I loved and desired her.

A soft click sounded and the bathroom light was off. The only thing illuminating the room was the soft ambiance of the hall night light outside our door. My breath caught and my eyes went wide at the image before me.

Bella...

_Oh god, Bella_.

She was dressed in only a deep blue lace thong, no more, no less. Her breasts were beautifully resting against her body and her taut pink nipples stood at attention as I drank in the sight before me.

I couldn't talk, I couldn't even think really. She had rendered me speechless and my body was on fire with need.

I watched dumbfounded as she made her way to the bed and stood right in front of the low foot board. She crawled across the bench that sat just at the end and made her way slowly toward my body on all fours.

Her hair was up in a bun and it gave me a perfect shot of her full breasts falling forward freely from her position. My cock twitched at just the thought of running my hands over them, and before I could force myself to do anything, she was upon me.

Gently, Bella straddled my hips and dropped soft open mouth kisses on my chest. I hissed at the pleasure her simple gesture gave me, and then realized that if that felt good, then I was going to go into cardiac arrest once the show really got started.

I could feel her firm, round, deliciously large breasts pushing against my abs as she worked her lips lower. Her nipples dragging across my over heated skin that was dying to let loose the desire building in me.

When she reached my bare length, she gave the same open mouthed, gentle kisses to my head and shaft.

My eyes were ready to pop out of my head and my hands were gripping the sheets so tightly in effort to control myself. Just then, she quickly brought her lips to my ears and whispered, "_Just let go, baby."_

That did it. I flipped us so fast, that Bella didn't have time to even squeal. As soon as she was beneath me, I dropped hard, fast kisses to her chest and nipples. I was ready to just ram into her and make her scream with passion.

Just as the thought came into my head, it was gone. I wanted to take her, but I wanted it to last. These moments would be few and far between, and I for one was going to enjoy ever single second of it.

I slowed my pace and took time on all the parts that were open to me. I wanted her covered core to be last, sort of as an entree if you will.

I felt her small, dainty hands running over my body with each nibble, kiss and caress I bestowed upon her.

We didn't talk, we just loved one another in peace and quiet. When she could take no more and her lace was drenched in her juices, I sat up slightly and removed her panties.

Ah, Bella's beautiful bare core...only for me. I smiled at it and then dove right in. It didn't take her long to come with a loud scream and a tug to my hair, I had licked and nibbled on her clit repeatedly as well as dipped my tongue in her to get a good taste of the work I had done. I was pleased with her pleasure and when she could take no more, not even a soft peck to her core, I lined myself up to enter her.

Just as I was about to push into her, her hand reached out to my lower abs, a signal to stop. I froze where I was and gave her a confused look. I didn't get to say anything, because Bella was faster.

"_You need to use a condom, love." _

She said it low, and almost sad like. My brow furrowed in confusion so she continued.

"_My birth control is a little off, from my flu...the antibiotics..." _She trailed off.

Comprehension hit me, and I dropped a kiss to her cheek with a soft smile and whispered gently to her.

"What if I don't want to use a condom...."

Bella's eyes lit up with understanding and then a smile appeared in place of her frown.

"_Really? You...would want that too?"_ she said with hope in her voice.

I caught the word _too, _and then realization dawned on me, she wanted another baby. I had thought about this many times over the last year. Mostly when I would see Emma playing alone or talking to her dolls, I would feel a small tug of sadness for her. She had Bella and I, hell she even had all my family, but she was missing something, and to be honest so were we.

Emma had brought so much joy into our lives and the overwhelming need to share it was eating at me. I had been to much of a coward to bring it up with Bella, in fear that she wouldn't want that and I would make her feel guilty. So I left it alone.

But now, with my wife beneath me, ready to take her and claim her in my body, courage built up and I blurted out what was in my heart.

"Love, I want to have another baby with you...I want our family to grow, love." I finished with a kiss to her lips and then waited for a response. I didn't get one.

Instead, I got pushed back onto my butt, and then Bella was above me. She lowered her self over my length and began rocking her hips.

I tried with all my strength to keep my eyes open, but I couldn't. She was riding me so damn well that my toes were curling and my teeth were grinding.

I felt her lips next to my ear and then a breathy sentence, "_Give us a baby, Edward."_

Her words were soft, gentle and wistful. My breath hitched from the intimate request, and then pride from knowing that this was my gift to give her this time around.

That night we came together over and over, aching to be closer and not being sated when we were joined so intimately. I spilled my seed into her many times over the course of that weekend, and now all we could do was sit back and wait.

**BPOV**** (one month later)**

I was working on the Christmas toy drive for the Salvation Army. Emma was by my side, sorting girl toys from boy toys and placing them in piles to be wrapped. I smiled down to her as she had a great look of determination over her face.

She took all her tasks to heart and gave each one all of her attention. It was one of my greatest joy's in life, to see her so happy and content. I loved that she loved to be with me, moreover, that she loved to help other people.

I went back to my wrapping and then drifted off to la la land.

**(Earlier this morning)**

I had woken up late, Emma was already laying on the bed with me and watching the Backyardigans. I was exhausted lately.

I went to bed at the normal time every night this week, but each morning it never failed that I would wake up feeling like I had just run a marathon.

I didn't want to jump to conclusions, so I chalked it up to fatigue from the volunteering. It was a busy time of year, and I had been doing a lot over the last few weeks. Even with that thought in my head, I could feel the excitement bubbling inside my chest at the thought of being pregnant.

Emma had rehearsal all this week, for her role in the Nut Cracker this weekend. She was to be a sugar plumb. Edward and I were taking turns going to the extended rehearsals in the evening this week while the other prepared dinner.

Edward had also arranged for him to be on call this week so that he was free for Emma's recital. I hadn't even asked him to do it, he arranged it himself when he saw the information for her show.

Lucky for me, this day was to have an afternoon practice as well. I had arranged for Esme to take her and stay with her, because I had made an appointment.

I was going to see Dr. Young this afternoon.

Nobody had know about the appointment, not even Edward. He was convinced that I hadn't been ovulating when we had tried the first time, but I knew it was his cute way of making sure we had sex at every possible chance. I didn't mind that, not one bit.

After Esme had picked up Emma, I grabbed my things and headed for the hospital. I made my way to Obstetrics and was escorted back immediately to a small room.

I had to admit, being a Cullen had it's privileges.

Once Dr. Young had came in, we talked over the average medical questions and then waited for the blood results.

In between the waiting, she and I spoke over some questions she had about weddings. Emily and Edward had stayed good friends after the favor she had done us with Emma, and when I would come to visit Edward, we would often come and take her for lunch.

She had finally gotten a ring from Sam, her long term boyfriend, and was asking about venues and vendors to use. Just as I was giving her Alice's phone number, a nurse walked in to hand her some results.

I bit my lip out of habit, hoping and praying the results were positive. We were ready, Edward and I. We were ready to make our family grow.

Emily looked over the papers and then looked up to me smiling and gave me a hug of congratulations.

*********************************

I snapped out of La la land when I heard the garage being opened, Edward was home. My smile wouldn't go away as I sat there. Emma had jumped up and ran to greet him at the entry to the kitchen once she heard the door click open.

I was ready to scream that I was pregnant and do a happy dance, but I held back. I wanted this to be a fun surprise for him. When I had told him of Emma, it was over a phone and tears. We were in a foreign place then, from where we were today, and I just wanted him to realize how far we had come.

So instead of the squeals, I got up nonchalantly and walked over to him. I gave him a welcome home kiss and wrapped my arms around his waist.

I knew his routine, I knew it like I knew how to write. First he would go upstairs, shower, change and then join us in the kitchen while I pulled our dinner out of the stove. Once we were all together, he would ask about our day and we would all share something.

I always made sure to have dinner ready at the same time each day, I liked that Emma could depend on a schedule, and it kept Edward and I in sync as well.

I waited patiently for him to go through his ritual, except this time fifteen minutes felt like two hours. As I waited, I thought of how lucky I was.

I had a husband that loved, and supported me. He adored our daughter and came home with a satisfied expression every day. We didn't fight, we weren't petty.

You'd be surprised how good things can be when your not worried about money, or fighting with an in law. We had our space from everyone, it made our time together that much better when we did come together as one.

I filled the table and when I came back to grab the potatoes, Edward was there. He smiled to me and spanked my butt playfully before we all sat down together to eat.

We had missed out on the day questions, and that ruined my way of dropping the news. So I boded my time, just waiting until the meal was finished and clean up was over.

Edward took Emma up for her night time routine, and I loaded up the dishwasher. Once that was completed, I grabbed my prescription paper from my purse and tucked it into my pocket and headed up stairs.

Emma was tucked in and ready to sleep when I came in and kissed her good night. Edward stayed to read to her and I went to the room to wait.

Ten minutes later, Edward walked in and came to my side. We sat on the bed together in peace for a long while before he broke to silence.

"How was your day love?"

I smiled back. This is what I had been waiting for all day, that one question was all I needed at this point.

I kept my face composed as I proceeded to tell him about the toy drive, and Emma's practice. He listened with such attention, like I was telling him the meaning of life.

I finished my "day" and then laid my head back as if tired. He kissed my forehead and got up to go brush his teeth. I smiled then, this is what I had wanted. Just as he reached the door, I called out to him in a casual tone.

"_Oh! I forgot...my doctor gave me a new prescription, can you get it filled for me tomorrow?"_

As if it were any other request, he nodded his head with a firm yes and replied, "Sure, baby. Absolutely. Where's the script?"

I got up carefree and dug into my pocket and handed him the paper. I didn't linger, I just placed it in his palm and walked over to the bathroom door to get my night shirt.

I heard the paper being opened, and the butterflies in my stomach took off as if in flight. I grabbed my shirt and turned around just in time to see his eyes go wide and his lips form into a smile. He looked over to me, then down at the paper one more time as in question. I just nodded and bit my lip with a smile.

He was instantly everywhere. My face, my arms, my back. I could feel his strong arms holding and caressing me with each second that went by.

I don't know how or even when, but my clothes were gone from my body and I was laying in the bed underneath my husband.

He looked down into my gaze and kissed me with so much force that it took my breath away. I was deeply in love with Edward Cullen, he was my other half, my soul mate. If he were to cease to exist, or leave my life, I would be lost.

But he was here...right now. In my arms and fully committed to our family. Short of an act from God, I knew he would always be with me.

We had made it through a lot, far more than most would find reasonable, but made it we had. That night we made love over and over again until the early hours of morning.

He held me and kissed me through out the night as we lay tangled in each others body. I could feel his hands rubbing over my flat stomach, the same way he would do when I carried Emma. I was in heaven there in his arms, and neither of us found it necessary to leave the other the entire time.

Yes, our family was growing. Edward and I were growing, and there wasn't very much else I could of asked for in life.

THE END.


	34. Closure Part 1

In my final reviews, a reader asked for a face off with Renee and Charlie. I thought it was only fair to cover all the ground with these two, seeing as they have overcome a great deal as it is. I wanted to give Bella her moment, her chance to show them both what she had accomplished and created in her life with Edward.

This is just a peek into the plot, it should only be maybe three chapters, and I promise they will be Beta'd. Tina (rangernstephfan) is back! Thanks for the help Tina ;)

This is the beginning, so if you have something you would like to see happen during that meeting, let me know. This is for all you loyal readers who have been here from the beginning, I hope you enjoy it!

CCMAJ

* * *

**EPOV**

My eyes were burning and my back ached. I had just gotten out of an eight hour surgery, and I was ready to go home and sleep for a long time.

With a sigh, I made my way to my locker and sat down on the bench to get my clothes together and shower. I vaguely heard the creek of the door from behind me as I began peeling off my socks and then yanking off my scrub top.

"Son" I heard my father's voice call out to me and I spun around to see him. I was surprised to see him here, but the shock was replaced with fear when I saw the grim look on his face.

I was on my feet as soon as I registered the concern, a series of different scenarios were running through my mind, and they all included Bella and the kids. My chest tightened and my breath caught, I had no idea what to ask, and moreover, I wasn't prepared for any answers.

"I need to speak with you about something, I just don't know where to begin."

I took a deep breath and nodded my head, as unsure as I was about this, I knew I needed to know what was going on.

"Is it about Bella? Is she okay? Are the kids alright? Did something happen?

My heart pounded harder when I saw his head nod yes. I stepped forward, unsure how to take his response.

"Which is it!? What is going on!?" I didn't mean to yell at him, but when it came to my family, there were no limits. I just wanted to know what hell I was about to face. In that fifteen seconds, images of Bella, Emma and Ethan were consuming my mind.

I saw Bella with her round belly, I saw Emma and Ethan as babies in my loves arms, and the feelings it evoked had me on the verge of a breakdown. I didn't hear my dad walking to me, but before I could fall apart completely, he was shaking my arms.

"They are fine! They are all safe, Edward. Calm down!"

When he said that they were all safe, I felt my heart rate calm. I took a deep calming breath and flopped back down to the bench with my head in my hands.

"What the hell is going on, Dad?" My voice was cracking and my tone was just above a whisper. I knew he would never say something like that as a joke, so I knew there was indeed an issue, but knowing that they were all okay and safe was enough to calm me.

Dad came and sat down beside me, his hands clamped together and resting over his knees. I watched him carefully, looking at him now, I could see the frustration in his expression, as if he was battling on how to word it. My dad at a loss for words was definitely something new, I knew that whatever it was he was fighting with, was serious.

He turned to me after a moment and found some resolve. With his shoulders squared, he began.

" I got a call this morning from a friend of the family." His eyes were focused on his hands still, and I felt some tension leave my body at the thought that this was about a misunderstanding. I could deal with an angry relative, hell I could deal with a tragedy as long as it didn't include my wife and kids.

"Do you remember the fiasco with Tanya those years ago?" I went stiff the second he said her name.

I had done a good job of blocking that vile woman from my memories, but hearing her name just now and under the circumstances in which I was speaking with my father, had me angry as if the things she had done were yesterday. If Tanya were doing anything to make a play at my family, I would not think twice about making her life a living hell.

"What is she doing, Dad? Are you sure Bella and the kids are safe?" I knew all too well what Tanya was capable of. After she attacked my Bella while she was carrying Emma and nearly caused her to miscarry, my feelings toward that creature was far from favorable. I hated the fact her name was even being brought up.

"Well, first off, it's not, Tanya. The call came from a private investigator who had done some work for your mother and I. She was who we called when the Tanya situation happened. When she agreed to go away, we still went ahead and kept tabs on her location. We wanted a warning if she went back on her agreement. I'm happy to tell you that she has made no move toward you or the family, so don't get too invested in that thought."

I was starting to get frustrated at the length of this conversation, I just wanted to know what the hell was going on. I think my dad saw that, so instead of waiting for me to calm down, he gave it to me straight.

"Well, Amy called this morning and told us that she had received a call about locating an Isabella Swan."

My head snapped back at attention from the mention of Bella's maiden name and instantly worry was replaced with jealousy. Who the hell would be looking for Bella now? Maybe an ex-boyfriend? I didn't like that one bit.

"Who is looking for her? What do they want?" I could of spat out about a hundred different questions, but I was stopped when my dad held out his hand as in signal for me to stop.

"It was Charlie Swan." he said.

My heart dropped and I felt my breath getting heavy as the realization of what was happening washed over me. I knew who Charlie Swan was, that was Bella's father.

I also knew that he was an un-wanted visitor in our home. Bella and I had spoken of her parents three times in our marriage. The first time was when we discussed Emma's baby announcement. The second time was our wedding, and the third was when Ethan was born.

I hated that she didn't have family, well... Swan family, to share the news of our children with. Our two children were welcome into this world and celebrated amongst my family, but Bella's parents didn't even know they existed.

I knew it hurt her, she would never admit it, but I knew Bella in every sense of the word. She was warm and compassionate. For her to be unfazed by the lack of interest her parents had in her life was far from believable.

I never made her talk about them, I had promised her years ago that she would never have to. I hated what I saw on her face when she did. When she _had_ been willing to discuss them, her expression was a mix of pain and anger. She resented them, and I couldn't blame her. Between the two of them, they had both managed to dismiss her graduation and any achievement she had while at Yale and as far as I knew, her life.

I couldn't understand that, the idea that the two people who created my sweet and loving Bella would be able to hurt her and make her achievements less than admirable. She deserved her moment, she deserved to shine and be congratulated, but neither of them gave that to her.

I don't know the full conditions of Charlie's absence, but Renee was a different story. She was jealous of Bella, and that alone had caused her to say and do such a horrible thing to her.

All this and more was running through my head as I sat there, I didn't even try to ask anymore questions. I knew the issue now and all I needed to do was figure out how to proceed. Obviously, Bella needed to know, but I really didn't want to worry her with this news. I would see to it that she was left in peace if that is what she wanted. If it came down to it, I would go in her place to meet with Charlie and send him on his way.

"Edward, there's a little more to it." my dads voice broke through my thoughts.

"Amy said that her mother was also a part of the call and that she seemed quite determined to locate her. She said that more than one agency was hired."

I was down right irritated now. I knew that Renee was her mom, but seriously? She had been the main reason Bella had decided to cut them out of her life in the first place.

"Honestly, Dad… I don't really care if these people are arch angels from heaven. Bella is my only concern, and if she tells me to make them go away, I will do just that. I can guarantee that I will not allow them to come in an shake the quiet, happy life we have."

My dad was nodding his head in agreement. He loved Bella fiercely, and without hesitation. She was in every sense of the word his daughter, and that aside, he adored her. I was grateful at that moment for the fact the he was as protective as I. This connection he had, had now given us the opportunity to be prepared as opposed to blind sided by this news. I was now able to go to my love and tell her the situation and get her wishes instead of having her be surprised and upset later.

I stood up and slipped my shoes back on, all thoughts of sleep were now gone from my body, and the only thing I wanted to do was get to Bella and the kids. I grabbed my bag and flung it over my shoulder and headed for the door.

"Edward…" he called out to me. I stopped in my tracks to see his eyes boring seriously into my own.

"You make sure to tell her that we are all behind her decision, one hundred percent… no matter what she chooses to do."

I smiled at him and gave him a firm nod. I would pass that message along and I knew what it would mean to her. So did he.

"Call me when she decides what she wants, Amy said she will keep things hushed until we speak with her."

I turned again and headed for home.

**BPOV**

I had quite the relaxing evening going on here. Ethan was laying across the couch and relaxing with his feet on my lap while we watched and listened to Emma practice the piano. She was quite good for a child the age of six.

Edward had been passionate about making sure that both Ethan and Emma were exposed to fine culture and education. Emma was attending one of the best private schools in the city, and Ethan was enrolled there for a few hours a day in the play center.

Ethan was almost four, but he had a passion for knowledge. Every morning when Emma would leave for school, I would find him crying on the couch and clutching a back pack and bawling because he wanted to go too. I did my best to make his mornings as educational as possible, but with Ethan, more is always better.

I continued to pat Ethan's back while I smiled on at Emma playing her notes. She was still so sweet, and she reminded me of Edward when she focused on her tasks with such great care. Emma, loved the piano, she had begged and pleaded for private lessons. Having, Edward, as her daddy, she achieved that goal in under one hour. Thankfully, she was serious about the desire and I was glad to be able to give her the opportunity.

Emma's fingers stilled as the garage door adjoining in the kitchen creaked. She flew off the bench and was in Edwards arms faster than I had been able to get Ethan's feet off my lap. I realized that when he didn't even flinch when I stood, he was asleep. I leaned down and kissed his copper hair and went to find my husband.

I made it into the kitchen and found Edward holding Emma and talking to her.

"How was your day, Sweet Pea?" She giggled into his shoulder and proceeded to tell him about how well she had done in class and that she needed ten dollars for a donation to the homeless.

It never failed to amaze me at just how giving she was. At her young age of six, Emma was already a part of clubs that collected and donated things for the less fortunate. When she had come home after her first day of school and asked for a garbage bag, I had been baffled as to why. I gave her the bag and followed her into her room and watched as she rummaged through her clothes and threw things in the in that she didn't wear anymore.

When I had asked her what she was doing, she told me that there were kids her age all over the world who didn't have clothes to wear or food to eat. She began crying as she explained that in school they learned the value of a meal in other countries. She told me that she didn't think it was right for anyone to be hungry.

I watched Edward's face soften even more at her request and for a moment he just held her close with no words.

"Emma, I will give you more than ten dollars, it's a very good cause and we are blessed to be able to help others. You are a very good person, sweetheart. Don't you ever change, okay?" he told her.

Emma nodded kissed his cheek and squirmed her way down and back to the family room to practice. I called out to stop her, I didn't want her to wake Ethan.

"Emma, go get dressed for bed, sweetie. I'll be up in a minute." I saw the desire to protest, but she didn't. She merely pouted and turned to make her way upstairs.

With Ethan down for the count, and Emma up the stairs to change, I had my husband to myself. I turned back to him just in time to see him reach for me and pull me off the ground. His lips were on me as soon as I was secure.

I loved these kisses, I loved this man. I never tired of seeing him come home to me, and it never got old the way he would caress and rub along my body. I felt myself getting excited at the idea of taking him fully, but I reigned myself in before I got out of hand. Once the kids were in bed, then I would act on it.

I heard him groan in protest as my kisses to him slowed, but he didn't really fight me. He knew what needed to be done, and I promised myself mentally, that I would make it up to him.

"Hi, baby" I greeted him.

His smile lit up at the endearment I used and he snuggled me closer to him.

"Mmm, good evening, love. I missed you..." he whispered into my neck as he nibbled there for a moment.

I couldn't have wiped the smile from my face if I wanted to, moments like this just made my entire day.

"How was the surgery?" I asked. He took a deep breath as he recalled the extensive procedure and I could see the dark circles under his eyes. He looked so worn out, and I felt horrible for having kept him down here for as long as I had.

I began to pull away, I wanted him to be able to go rest, but he never released me. Instead, I was kept there in his arms and he held me for a moment in silence.

Any other day I wouldn't have thought much about it, he always held me. But on days that he had surgeries, he would usually be so tired that after a hello kiss, he would be off to a shower and then to bed. The fact that he was still holding me, and hadn't as much as hinted at sleep had me on alert.

"Edward, baby, is there something wrong?" I asked him. We didn't hide things from one another, so if there was indeed an issue, I would hear about it now.

He huffed as if exasperated and pulled back a little. I watched his face for a moment as he collected his thoughts. When he looked as if he were ready to talk, he began.

"I wouldn't say _wrong_, but there is definitely something I need to let you know about." he stated. I pulled back now, not a lot , but enough so that I could see his eyes.

"What is it? Is everything okay at work?" My voice was confused, I could hear that with my own ears.

Edward was already shaking his head no and doing his best to calm my imagination.

"It's nothing like that love, but it's something I want you to know about." He had my full attention now, this sounded serious. I was just about to dive in, but before I could, Emma called out for me to tuck her in.

I looked back to Edward and he gave me a warm smile. He leaned over, kissed my cheek and whispered into my ear, "Go, tuck in Emma and I will meet you in our room when your done."

I nodded and started to walk away, but I was pulled back by his strong arms.

"I love you" he told me. It was something he always said, but the look in he held was so much warmer and comforting than took me aback a little, but I didn't know why. I managed to pull myself together in time to reply.

"I love you too, baby." I was getting scared, but I had no idea why. I turned to leave then and saw Ethan squirming about the couch. Before I could ask, Edward scooped him up and followed me up the stairs and we parted our ways to get the kids in their beds.

**EPOV**

After I had tucked Ethan in, I went to our room and got in the shower. I was still letting the hot water work over my tired shoulders when I felt Bella's tight nipples push up behind me. I sighed in contentment as her hands snaked around my waist and she rested her head along my back.

I held her hands and turned around so I could see her face and body. My angel was still as gorgeous as the day I had met her, and it never ceased to amaze me at how lucky I was to have her as my wife.

"Hey, you. I thought I would come see if you needed an extra hand in here." she teased.

I could only smile at her playful teasing as I dropped my mouth to hers and took hold of her firm ass into my hands and slowly pulled her up my body. I went hard at just the feel of her skin along my bare body and before I could think straight, I was pulling her over my length.

"Oh, God…mmm, Edward, baby, that feels so good." She whispered into my ear. I felt myself shake from the way she sounded. I loved hearing her talk while I was inside of her, the things she would say made it that much better as we worked ourselves to release.

I kept my pace slow and concentrated. I could feel her muscles tighten with every thrust inside and I knew I was getting her sweet spot when her pants became outright cries. Making sure not to move from inside of her, I positioned her on the wall and pinned her with my body.

She was so slick from the water and the marble wall helped glide her easily over my cock. I went harder inside of her and the feel of her tightening along with her pleas for more had me nearing the edge faster than I wanted.

Bella's right arm slipped from behind my neck and traveled down my chest to where we were joined. I felt her soft fingers play along my abs and it caught my attention. When I looked down, I saw her playing with her clit and sliding her fingers along my shaft each time I would pull out.

I gasped at the perfect feel of it all and I began to move faster inside of her, causing her fingers to tighten along me as her walls did the same. I was doing my best to stay quiet, I wouldn't be able to handle it if we had to stop.

"Oh, Bella…fuck baby, you feel so good…do you like it, baby? Mmmm, do you like the way I feel inside you?"

I took her left earlobe into my mouth and teased it with my tongue. She was digging her nails into my shoulders now, and before I could ask her again, I could hear her high pitch voice telling me she was coming.

I was right behind her and just as she began to shake and pull on my hair, I spilt into her and squeezed her ass in response.

We both stay still like that, with Bella in my arms and her legs wrapped around my waist. I didn't dare move our of her just yet, no, I still needed to get a grip of myself before I let her move away from me. After a minute or so, I let her glide down and I pulled out of her.

I kissed her softly as we washed each other, my fingers easily gliding over her soft skin as if it were made of silk. I sighed as Bella soaped her hands and glided them over my length while I massaged her breasts and nipples. I didn't let the fear of what I had to tell her rule me for that time, I just wanted to give her love right then, so that is what I did.

After we stroked and cleaned each part of each other, I turned the water off and helped Bella from the shower. I could see her eyes were getting wearier as time progressed, and it did nothing to help my resolve.

When we were each changed and walking into the room, she asked the burning question.

"What's going on, Edward? Did something happen?"

For the first time in five years of marriage, she sounded nervous. I mean, she had been nervous before, but the way she said this made me think she was on a whole different avenue.

I took her face into my hands and kissed her softly, I wanted to give her whatever comfort I could before I dropped the bomb. She kissed me back, but it was guarded now.

When I opened my eyes to read her face, I saw that she looked so scared. I felt my stomach turn at the knowledge that I had to tell he this. I wasn't sure how she would take it. I wanted more than anything for it to go away, but I knew that the last time I had wished something away, it just blew up in my face. I would not let this be an obstacle for us, I would be there to help her get through whatever lay ahead.

"Don't be scared, baby. This is nothing that we can't fix, okay?"

She stared at me for a moment, almost as if she were trying to find a hidden meaning in my words. I knew this was going to be hard for her, but I was with her, and I would _never _let anyone hurt her.

"So this isn't about us… our… marriage?" her words were low and scared still. I was lost for a moment until I noticed her fidgeting with her wedding ring. Her thumb kept rubbing against it as if to make sure it was still on.

It dawned on me then, the direction in which her thoughts were. She looked so scared because she thought it was about us. I pulled her into my lap and grabbed her ring finger and placed a kiss there.

"Absolutely not, love. You and I… were in this forever." I kissed her nose and then her eye lids as she relaxed into my arms.

She seemed so much more free in that moment, and I took that time to remind her of how much I loved her.

"Bella, there will never be a day that I don't want you… do you understand that? I will always be yours and you will always be mine. Nothing and no one will ever, EVER come between us."

I watched as the passion in her eyes lit up again. She smiled and nodded to me before kissing me hard. I succumbed to her and we both stay that way for a long moment before I remembered what it was I did have to tell her.

I pulled back and smoothed the hair from her face, when I could see her eyes clearly, I began.

"Baby, Dad came to see me at work today."

She just nodded, but the relaxation was gone. I kept going, because I knew this needed to come out.

"He got a call this morning from a friend of the family, this friend, is a private investigator and works for them."

She just nodded along, absorbing the words that were coming out of my mouth.

"Well, this friend received a call about you… well about finding you." I watched her eyes go wide and I could see the questions in them as soon as I said it was regarding her. I just kept going though, I wanted this to be done with so I could comfort her and find a solution.

She stood and had her arms crossed on her chest as if that would keep something at bay from hurting her. I could see she had a pretty clear idea where this was going, so I stood along with her and continued on.

"It was your parent's, love, they have hired people to find you." I said it as calmly as I could and held her hands the entire time.

"W-What did they say exactly?" her voice was breaking and her brow was furrowed. I hated this, hated this with every fiber in my being. I didn't think much good could come from this little hunt they were on, but it wasn't my place to make that call. This was, Bella's decision, and I needed to make sure she understood I was going through this with her.

"I don't know the specifics, love. I didn't react too well when I heard the news myself. Dad is the one who talked with, Amy, so he would be able to answer that better than I could."

She nodded and made her way back into my arms. I held her and rubbed her back to soothe her nerves, she looked lost right now and I didn't want her to feel alone.

"How do you feel about this, baby? Are you okay?"

I watched her face for any sign that this was making her upset, but all I could see right now was confusion. I understood that, she had lived without them for the last eight years, and only now were they attempting to locate her. There was something very unsettling about the whole situation.

I'm sure there was a reason, but I hated to think it was in regards to something selfish or needy. I could take the high road if this was just about finding, Bella, but if it wasn't, well… let's just say that I would not be very calm in that matter.

I felt Bella squeeze me tighter and bury her face in my chest. I had so many questions, but she still hadn't answered the one I just posed. She needed time, and I could give her that. Instead of harping, I picked her up into my arms and walked over to the bed. I lifted back the covers and placed her gently on the mattress, once she was settled, I scooted in behind her and held her to me.

I was about to ask her another question, but I heard her breath hitch as if ready to snore, and I knew she was asleep. I tucked her in closer to my side, and let her rest.

We would deal with this tomorrow… as a family.


	35. Closure Part 2

Tina...thank you for being a remarkable Beta! I appreciate the work you put into this chapter, and I love the way you work!

What a great response I got from the loyal readers of this story. Thank you for taking the time to tell me how happy you are with the plot.

I added one more POV in this chapter, I thought it was important to get a read on said POV. With that, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I will begin writing the next one tomorrow and should have a posting by Wednesday. Remember, if you review, I send you a teaser, its more of a thank you, but you get the picture.

Enjoy chapter 2 of Closure....

* * *

**BPOV**

It was three in the morning and I was wide awake, I had been trying to find sleep again, but it just wouldn't take me. I wanted to cry, this wasn't what I needed in my life right now. When, Edward came home and told me that my parents were looking for me, it took me by more than surprise. I had no idea what I was going to do, and moreover, I had no idea what to feel.

I had thought about this moment before, but in my mind this wasn't exactly how it played out. What I had envisioned was a chance encounter, a simple twist of fate that would bring me face to face with my past. I was prepared for that, I was far more at peace with that idea because in that theory, we were in neutral ground, away from either's home base and security.

I didn't want them in my home, and I had no desire to be in theirs. The time I had spent in both my mother and father's homes were never pleasant, and I wanted no reminders of what I had gone through with them.

I mean, what the hell did they want anyway? I'm thirty three years old right now, I hadn't spoken to my mother since I was twenty two...I hadn't physically seen her since I was twenty! My dad, well I hadn't seen _or _talked to him since I turned eighteen. I guess that he didn't feel the need to follow up with me in my adult life.

I was on the verge of tears at that moment, but then I felt Edward shift behind me and hold me closer. He brought his chin down to rest on my shoulder and spoke to me in a calm voice.

"How are you feeling, baby?" he finished his question with a kiss on the tip of my shoulder and in that moment, I didn't care about anything else, beside the man holding me and the kids in their room of the house he had built me. I found resolve in that kiss, I found strength in his embrace and I went from unsure to sure in the span of two seconds.

I smiled to myself and turned in his arms so I could face him. I was so glad I did, because the image of Edward was not one I took for granted... ever. He was smiling down to me, his eyes still heavy with sleep and his hair in a wild disarray. He was beautiful, and I often found myself thanking the lord that he loved me.

I kissed his chest and rested my right hand on his cheek before answering. "I feel indifferent... I guess. I don't really know what I feel."

He watched me with careful eyes while I spoke and when I finished he pulled me on top of him and pushed my hair away from my face.

"I love you, Bella. Do you have any idea just how much you mean to me?" he kissed my nose and waited for me to respond.

"I know how much I love you... so if it's even as close as that, then I feel very lucky." I smiled gently to him and dropped my head to his chest to rest. I felt his hands stroking my back and grazing my butt, it was heaven.

"You compare a lone tree to an entire forest..." he whispered into the quiet that surrounded us.

I smiled as I lay on his chest and let his words settle into my bones. I knew that we could compare our love for hours, and in the end we would be no closer to giving in that we were right now, so I just accepted his words and hugged him tighter.

"Any idea what your going to do about your mom and dad, love?" I took a deep breath when the question was finally out. I didn't really want to answer this right now, but I knew that I had to at some point.

"You don't have to have an answer right now, baby. You can take all the time you need, no one is going to tell them anything until you decided what it is that you want, so don't feel rushed." He said the words quickly as a follow up to his last question, in an attempt to keep me from feeling pressured.

I propped my head on my hands that lay over his chest and looked him straight in the eye. I knew what I was going to do, but I just hadn't admitted it yet. What better time than now? I thought.

"Well, I am going to see them... see what it is they want from me after all these years." I took a moment to collect my thoughts and Edward began his comforting circuit on my back once more.

"I mean, I hope that this is something that they are doing out of love... but I doubt it. My mom probably needs a kidney or something... maybe Charlie, who knows."

Edward stiffened beneath me and the circuit stopped for a moment while he collected himself. I knew what had gotten to him, it was my stupid kidney comment and I was kicking myself already for having said it. I waited patiently for him to relax again, and when he began rubbing my back once more, I apologized.

"I'm sorry, baby. That wasn't very smart of me to say." I kissed his chest and held him tight waiting for him to say something, but when he didn't respond, I got nervous.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked.

He didn't say anything for a moment, but then he stopped rubbing my back and flipped us so that he was looking down at me. His face was serious, but his eyes were sad. I hated that I had been the one to cause that look, and I reached out to soothe him. I didn't get that far, instead he asked me something I wasn't prepared for.

"What if that is the case, love? What if they need or want something from you? What will we do?"

It was so forward that it caught me off guard. I didn't have an answer to that, even though I had thought seriously about it. If this was an attempt to find me for a medical need, I had a good grip on myself to know that I would more than likely give them what was needed. My logic behind that, was that I was born and because of that, I had Edward and my kids. I could at least give them something in return for _that._

Now, on the flip side of that coin, there was a matter of money. As a Cullen, I had more than I knew what to do with. Granted, I was married into that money and the true owner of it all was, Edward. We lived more than comfortably on his salary, but he could retire tomorrow at the age of thirty four and we would continue on as if he hadn't and still leave our kids a trust fund.

The matter of money was one that I didn't concern myself with during our marriage. I knew that we had a great deal of it, but I never liked to know the details. I did however have full access to everything and my credit limit was pretty much endless with my cards. Not that I needed that, I was still a thrifty shopper and loved to cut coupons. I just didn't see the logic behind spending more than we needed to.

I was holding on to the hope that all they wanted was something family related or even health related, hell I had hoped this was just them making sure I hadn't died without them knowing. I wanted so badly to believe that all this was, was a welfare check. I didn't think I could handle, nor did I want anything more from either of them.

"Baby?" he whispered to me. I met his eyes and saw the concern there. It was concern for me and the decision I was going to have to make. I didn't want to think about it, but I knew I had to.

"Well if it's money they want, then I can honestly say that I have none to give... _you _are the provider in this family, I haven't worked in over five years."

As soon as I said the words, he was off the bed and on his feet. I sat up quickly at the site of him angry, his eyes were tense and he was staring at me with frustration.

"Bella! How could you even say something like that to me?" I was sure my face looked as lost as I felt, I had no words to come back with, because I wasn't sure exactly why he was angry.

He looked as if I had slapped him or told him I didn't love him. I moved to get off the bed and go to him, but he held his hands up, signaling me not to. He dropped his eyes and pinched his nose while I waited nervously on the bed for him to talk to me. A minute passed and he finally had enough composure to speak.

"Have I made you feel this way? Made you feel like what we have isn't as much yours as it is mine? Please tell me if I have so we can fix that right now, because I can promise you, Bella, there is nothing further from the truth."

My eyes were wet and I felt my breath hitch. I had no idea what to say or even how to respond to that, I was still lost on how we had gone from my parents to us in less than thirty seconds. He watched me for a moment while I struggled for words and then continued.

"When I took vows with you, Bella, I believed that we were joining lives... completely. What was mine became yours and vice-versus. No one is keeping tabs or making mental notes about who had spent what or earned money in this home. I get up and go to work so that I can provide my family with a life I feel they deserve. Never once have I asked you what was spent from _my _checking account, never once have I asked you what you spent _my_ money on. Everything we have is _ours, _Bella. Ours!"

I felt sick to my stomach as I listened to him vent, I had upset him when I told him that I had nothing to give them, he obviously didn't see it that way. I knew that realistically I had money, but when it came to Charlie and Renee, I didn't view it as mine to give away. It just felt wrong to even assume it was an option.

I was bawling now, my head was buried in my hands and the tears were dropping faster than I could keep up with. I didn't need this shit right now, I didn't need this mess period. I was angry at the both of them now, angry because I was having this argument with, Edward and angry because their impromptu search for me had caused it. I just wanted my life back, the life I had woken up to yesterday and the life I had loved everyday for over five years.

I felt the bed shift and before I could pick my head up, I was in my husbands arms and being cradled to his chest tightly. He was shushing me and kissing my head as we rocked in silence for a while trying to calm me down.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I know you're going through a lot right now... I shouldn't have said that...I'm sorry love."

He was apologizing to me, and I hated every second of it. I was the one who owed him an apology, I was the one who made him feel like crap a moment ago, and I was the one who should be begging for forgiveness.

"Stop...please, just stop..." I begged him in a small voice. He didn't though, he just held me tighter and kept whispering his love to me.

I was crying so hard that my body was shaking and my breath was coming in heavy gasps. I couldn't get control of myself and the longer I kept crying, the more I would fall apart. I turned my body from the cradling position I was in, so that I could wrap my legs around, Edward. I buried my face into his chest and held him to me as if he were my heart.

With a shaky breath and a tear streaked face, I began apologizing. "I'm so ...sorry ...I-I didn't mean to make you feel that way...I j-just... don't know what to think right now."

"I know, love. I know." Edward just continued to hold me and then after a few minutes, he laid us both back and wrapped us in blankets, I fell asleep not long after.

**EPOV**

I waited for my love to fall asleep and then got up and went down to my office.

I was still angry, but there was no way I would show her that reaction again. I didn't know who I was angrier with though, I was definitely upset with the words Bella had said to me earlier, but I wasn't angry with her. I was torn with being mad at myself and mad at her parents.

Bella didn't need this right now, she didn't need this at all. I opened up my email and began writing an urgent request to, Amy myself. I wanted details, I wanted names and addresses and anything else that would lead me to finding what the intent of this search was. When I had finished my final request, I hit send.

I sat there in my office for about a half hour just looking at the family photo sitting on my desk. The images of Bella, Emma and Ethan smiling back at me calmed me considerably and put my mind in the right place.

I spent the next half hour looking at all the pictures that adorned my office walls and shelves. Just above my fireplace was a portrait of Bella and I on our wedding day. I looked at that image the longest as I thought about what we had faced to get there, I reminded myself of the hell I had put her through not long after our relationship began. She had forgiven and loved me more than another should ever be allowed after something so cruel and heartless as I had done. Bella, gave me her heart and our children without a second of hesitation, anyone else would have been more careful, but she trusted me. When I let myself absorb that, the rest was easy to get over.

I knew she didn't mean what she had said earlier, I knew that she wasn't trying to insinuate that I controlled the money. I understood she was trying to protect me, protect _us _from anyone coming in and trying to stake a claim to what we had. Either way, I didn't like it. I didn't like the idea of Bella distancing herself from me in anyway even if it was to save me from anything. We were in this together, and I intended to make her see that.

I looked over to the clock and saw that it was six thirty in the morning. I didn't have to work today, but I did promise the kids I would take them out to the movies. I got up from my desk and made my way up the stairs to my wife.

When I walked into the bedroom, I saw the saddest site. Bella was clutching my pillow and crying into it as if I had left her and was never coming back. She looked so broken and sad curled up into a ball on my side of the bed.

"Baby?" I called out to her. She sat up so quickly at the sound of my voice and made her way to the end of the bed in an attempt to get to me. I stepped to her just as quickly and pulled her into my arms, while kissing her face repeatedly.

Bella sobbed into my chest and clutched me to her in a frenzy. I didn't know what to do or even what to say to calm her, I had no clue what had set her off this time. I didn't have to guess long before she confessed what was hurting her.

"I thought you had left me... I thought what I said made you realize how much you deserve better..."

I gasped and pulled her back to see her face. She was still broken, her eyes were red and her face was tear streaked while she looked at me with despair lacing her beautiful face. I had no idea how to respond, so I reacted on instinct and laid her back gently. She needed to know what I felt for her, she needed to know I would never leave or feel that way about her. She was my life.

I had pulled my pajama pants off and was now working on my shirt that she wore to bed. When I had her completely bare for me, I brought us together and held us that way for a moment. Neither of us moved or said a word while we lay there connected. I felt Bella's breathing calm and when I felt that she had stopped crying, I moved her hair and spoke to her in her ear.

"I will _never_ live in this world and not want you, love. I will _never _take myself away from you for anything or anyone."

I began moving inside of her and caressed her arms and legs while I kissed her with everything I had inside of me. I poured every ounce of love into that kiss and did everything I could to make her feel my love.

Bella sighed with contentment as I moved in and out of her body, and not long after I began, her body relaxed fully and took me in further. I felt her soft hands stroking my cheek and combing my hair as I continued kissing her.

This is what we needed, what she needed from me. She needed my assurance that I wasn't going anywhere or going to let anyone come into our lives and change things. I never increased our tempo, I kept us moving slowly and calmly over and over again. Each time I would tell her something new or find a word that described the way I felt for her, I would kiss her ear and tell her.

"I'm sorry..." she tried to apologize again, but I silenced her with a kiss to her lips. It wasn't necessary and I didn't require it. She had nothing to be sorry about and I didn't want her feeling as if she needed to make things right with me.

I moved my lips along her collar bone and brought them to her other ear and told her what I wanted her to know.

"I'm yours, my Bella. I am in this with you and for you. I won't let anything or anyone hurt you ever again, baby."

It was at those words that she began to tighten around me, the reassurance that I was going to protect her sent her over the edge so I began to tell her more.

"I will never hurt you...never leave you, never stop loving and wanting you, angel. I am yours, sweet girl."

I heard her panting into my ear and when she bit my shoulder to stifle her cry, I came inside of her and took her nipple into my mouth to stop me from grunting out loud. I kissed and liked her pink bud until my orgasm died down and then I gave her one more lingering kiss and gently pulled out of her and tucked her into my chest.

When I heard her breathing even out and then felt her body go limp, I let sleep take me.

**************

I felt a soft tickle against my neck, but I was still too tired to open my eyes and find out what caused it. The bed shifted and it peaked my curiosity enough to crack one eye and see what or who was moving around.

I saw Bella buttoning her shirt and smiling while biting her lip. I smiled at the vision before me, and I opened the other eye to get the full effect. It never stopped amazing me, how beautiful she was, Bella had a natural glow to her skin and the way she looked while waking up from a deep sleep was one that women spent hours in their mornings trying to achieve.

I rolled over and tried to touch her leg with my hand from where I was, she was barely out of reach and I tried once more with a good stretch. I looked up at her and saw she was smiling fully and watching me.

"Mmm, good morning, love." I whispered with a thick sleepy voice. Bella crawled back into the bed and rested her face along my chest for a moment, like she was trying to savor the time. I knew the feeling, and held her tightly as we lay there in silence.

"Thank you" she whispered into my chest. I knew what she was referring to, she was thanking me for last night. I chuckled and kissed her head.

"Anytime, love." We didn't say anything else about it, and when she got up, she kissed my face and walked into the bathroom, she stopped at the door and winked at me.

"I'm going to shower, then I'll start breakfast... any requests?"

I smirked at her and wiggled my eye brows to give her my suggestion, she just rolled her eyes and bit her lip before giving me her response. "You can have that for dessert..." I nodded my head with a smile and watched her make her way into the bathroom.

I got up after I heard the water running and headed down to my office. First thing I wanted to do was see if Amy had replied to my email yet and then I would go from there. I saw a red exclamation point waiting with an envelope when I opened my email.

I opened the message and read what Amy had written. She said that the information she had been given was old, and that the address they last had for her was her dorm room at Yale. Amy gave me addresses and contact information for both Charlie and Renee, but I noticed that Bella's mother had a different name altogether from even her maiden.

I pieced together what little information she gave me, and when it was all said and done, I had enough to proceed with my own investigation. Of course I would not do anything without Bella's consent, nor did I want to make her feel like I was stepping on her toes, I just simply wanted to be prepared.

I put all the info into a file and locked it in my desk then headed out to the kitchen. I saw Bella moving about the kitchen and flipping the pancakes and fluffing the eggs with a whisk. She was amazing, and it never failed to surprise me how happy she was in our life. Bella had many accomplishments in her own right, but she always minimized them in comparison to caring for our family. I wondered for a while if she would grow tired in her everyday routine, but Bella had a way of filling her days on her own.

She still wrote, and I knew that more than the original two children's books she had written were now completed. I encouraged her to get them published, but she didn't seem too thrilled with the idea. I never pushed her, but I encouraged her in her pursuits. She was warm, giving and generous in every sense of the word. Our children were the epitome of Bella and I would never be able to thank her enough for all the hard work she put into our lives.

I went to her and pulled her into a hug to see if I could help her with anything, but all she let me do was pour some coffee and keep her company as she finished breakfast for the kids and I. I was on my second cup of the morning when I heard Ethan make his way into the kitchen.

"Momma...I'm hungry!" he whined. I chuckled at his expression and even more at his appearance. Ethan had unfortunately inherited my messy copper hair and also my green eyes. He looked like a mini me and often acted like it too.

"It's almost done, go set your napkin and fork so I can give you a plate as soon as it's done." Bella told him in a soft voice.

I watched Ethan throw his arms around, Bella in an attempt to look more needy than he already did. Bella just patted his back and continued working on the eggs in front of her while he buried his face into her hip and tried to wake up more.

"Good morning, buddy." I called out to him. He didn't seem too thrilled with my jovial mood and gave me a furrowed brow and a wave before going back to his mom's hip. I chuckled and kept watching him with Bella. He was such a momma's boy, it wasn't even funny.

Ethan was a joy to have around, a true blessing. He was so much like me, that I was able to understand him from the get go. We both shared one passion in our lives, and that was Bella. Of course, our passion for her was different, I had an uncontrollable pull to her as my lover, but Ethan, he would more than likely grow up with Bella as the image of perfect in his head. A lot like the way I revered my own mother.

I was still lost in watching, Ethan, that I didn't hear Emma come and take a seat right next to me. I felt a fluff of curls touch my arm and I was met with a sleepy but calm, little girl.

"Hey! Good morning, sweet pea. Did you sleep well?" I pulled her into a hug and kissed her head while I waited for her to respond.

I watched Emma's face stretch into a yawn and then laughed as her little brown curls bounced around her head while she nodded a little with a content expression. "It was good, daddy, I slept good."

Emma and Ethan were a far cry from similar, their green eyes being the only thing similar about them. Where Emma was patient, Ethan was demanding. The two of them appreciated far different things from the other, but they loved each other fiercely. Their love for one another was never ending and always present. Of course they found times to be a typical brother and sister, but those times were few and far between. I knew it was because of Bella, these two had one hell of a role model in that woman, and it made me love her all the more.

My father told me not long ago, that I had a charmed life. We had been watching the kids run around the backyard while we grilled out on our deck, Emma had stopped the chase and had taken Ethan's hand to guide him around an ant pile. She was so protective of him. My dad watched her with awe as she made sure Ethan stayed away from the fire ants and then proceeded to let him tag her every time, even though she was faster.

"Will you look at that..." He trailed off. He watched the kids for another moment, and then took in the image of the deck and the house surrounding us.

"You really do have it all don't you son?" I was shocked by his words, my father was never one for boasting, but his words held more wonder than anything else. He seemed lost in whatever moment he was in, and as I looked around at the life that, Bella and I had built, I could understand why.

I snapped out of my memory when Emma started pulling on my arm and hopping off her stool. I followed her into the dining room and went to pull out her chair and then waited patiently behind Bella's.

I saw Ethan watching me, studying my gestures and watching how I treated not only his sister but his mother also. There wasn't much of a difference manners wise, except that I reserved a kiss for Bella's lips as I tucked her chair in, where as with Emma I kissed her hair.

I made sure to have my best manners forth when I realized Ethan was taking in my actions. I knew he was studying what I did, and no doubt would follow my lead. It was what I had done while watching my dad and even today I carried those manners with me. When Bella walked in, she placed our plates in front of our seats and then came to me, gave me a kiss and took her seat.

We ate in our usual manner, Bella and I talking about what needed to be done in the day and then splitting errands so that we had time as a family come the evening. When we had all eaten, I helped clear the dishes and then headed upstairs to get the kids ready for the movie. Once they were ready, I went to grab a shower, but stopped short of that idea when I walked in our bedroom and saw Bella sitting quietly on the bench at the foot of the bed.

I went to her and held her hand until she decided she was ready to talk. We sat that way for a few minutes and then she gave me her decision.

"I'm going to see them... I want to." She met my eyes when she said the last part, no doubt having said it for my benefit because she knew it would be my main question.

I nodded my head and kissed her cheek and stood. "I'll call Amy and set it up, love." I was a lot calmer than I thought I would have been, but I actually felt a lot more at ease with the fact that a decision had been made and no matter what, this would be dealt with.

I watched her face for a moment, there was something more than just this lingering over her, and it was chipping away at her spirit. I didn't want her to be worried, so me being me had to put my two cents in.

"My parents can stay with the kids, love... I'll go with you, you won't have to be alone."

It was when I said that, that her face turned into full fledged pain. I was trying to back pedal and make what ever wrong I had done right, but I didn't know where to begin. I was about to ask her, but she answered first before I could voice it.

"I want us all to go... the entire family." I took in her words, and tried to read into them. She said the _entire_ family, and she usually only said that word when she meant _all _the Cullen's. I watched her face for confirmation, and I saw that I was right. Bella needed us all to be there for her, and I knew why. With us, she was no longer alone, she had a family and in the chance this meeting turned into something ugly, she needed to know she still had one when she walked away.

"Okay, love. We'll be there... all of us." I kissed her nose and then her lips and went to grab my phone from the dresser.

**Charlie's POV**

I hadn't heard a single thing back from any of the investigators I had hired. I was still hopeful though, it had only been a day, but all the same I was on edge.

I hadn't talked to Bella in many years, and it hurt. I hated myself for the way I had basically pushed her out of my life, and I knew there was no way to atone for those mistakes. All I could hope for now was that she would let me be a part of her life.

As much as I wanted to hate Renee, I couldn't. I mean, I did, but not in an open or public way. I needed her to be on my side when Bella was found, so that she would help ease the tension. Bella had always been more of a friend to her mother, so I knew it would matter greatly the way, Renee saw me. As much as I hated the idea, I knew I needed to be good to Renee.

There was a big part of me that was bothered by the entire situation though, Renee had said that Bella called her one day and said she was going to be on her own for a while. Renee made it sound as if Bella were doing some soul searching and just wanted some space. It didn't sound like the Bella I had known, but at the same time, Renee had raised her and was always into that free spirit shit.

I honestly didn't care at this point, years had gone by without as much as a phone call from her and when I called Renee to get an address and she said she didn't have one, I began to worry. I was actually well past worried and moved right on into fear. I was scared that something had happened to her or that she was somewhere and couldn't get out of the country. I had seen many movies and reports about situations like that and it did nothing for my nerves.

I was doing my own search at home, using what resources I had and connections from various stations in the area, but I was coming up with nothing. I had one nervous breakdown and then another from the thoughts of what a failure of a father I was. I mean, who doesn't know where their only child is or how they are doing in life? What kind of a father allows that kind of a relationship to happen in the first place?

I wished I had just gone to her damn college graduation. I was so proud to see that invitation for that Ivy League school she had made it out of. I had never been more proud of anything in my entire life... Bella was a great person, and an even better gift than I could ever ask for. As proud of her as I was, I couldn't go to her graduation. I wanted to, god, how I wanted to. But I couldnt.

I couldn't face the crowds of parents and listen to how they had been there from the beginning and knew this day would come. These were parents who had not only encouraged, but raised their graduates and took a piece of that achievement for themselves. Besides a last name, and a timid personality, I hadn't given much else to, Bella. I didn't deserve to go, and I knew it.

I did what I could though, and sent her the bonus I had received that year. It wasn't much, but I figured five hundred dollars was at least something to help her out for the time she would be looking for a job. I had been far too ashamed to call her, so instead I wrote her and apologized to her about not being able to make it. I doubted she wanted me there anyway, she more than likely invited me out of some sense of obligation.

I was still thinking about all of that when my house phone rang. I figured it was probably the station, so I took my time answering it, but when I did, I nearly cried with tears of joy. It was an investigator that Renee had contacted, and she was calling to say she had located Bella.

The woman on the phone informed me that Bella was no longer Swan, but Cullen. I felt the wetness on my face before it registered that I had started crying. She was married, my little girl was married and I didn't even know it.

I listened to small details about her life, and took each one in as if they would grant me health. So much I hadn't known about her, so much time I would never get back. I was sitting in shock and digesting the information I had just been given, but then the woman named, Amy dropped an even bigger bomb.

"Mr. Swan? There's a bit more..." She had my attention, so I encouraged her to continue.

"First let me say that the, Cullen's are a fine family. They are actually a family I do work for on a regular basis..."

Her words caught me off guard, I didn't know what to think, but she continued. "Your daughter, Mrs. Cullen, is living a wonderful life. She is happy, she is loved and mostly, she is complete. I had an obligation to the family first and foremost, so Mrs. Cullen and her husband have both been made aware about your desire to contact her."

I was truly lost now, she made it sound as if Bella had married into the mob. I was getting nervous, because I had no idea where this conversation was going, I voiced my conerns.

"Are you trying to tell me something here in a round about way. Ma'am? I don't understand the reason for the secrecy or even the cautious tone your taking." She didn't hesitate to calm that theory.

"No, no... absolutely not, Mr. Swan. I just want you and Mrs. Dwyer to understand why I haven't charged the card I was given... I never took you on as a client, so I wont be seeking any type of payment... I only placated Mrs. Dwyers request so that I could speak with the Cullen's regarding this situation."

I was still lost, but I didn't want to spend another second talking about payments or placating, I just wanted to talk to my daughter.

"She has agreed to meet with you, your daughter, Isabella." I nearly choked from the emotions it evoked. It was all I wanted, a chance to see her and apologize for the disgrace I was.

"When? Where? Can I contact her?" I was near the point of begging, and I sounded pathetic even in my own ears.

"Mr. and Mrs. Cullen have asked me to fly both you and Mrs. Dwyer out to Chicago so that you could meet for dinner."

I was more than shocked at that, I didn't like the idea of Bella wasting money she may need on plane tickets for her mother and I.

"That's a bit of a cost, don't you think? I don't want her putting herself or her husband through any kind of financial burden just to see us."

There was a slight pause and then she continued. "I honestly don't believe that would be an issue Mr. Swan. Really, don't worry about that."

She sounded like she wanted to laugh, but I just brushed it off. It seemed that this woman knew more about my own daughter than I did, and that fact hurt more than I was able to bear at that moment. We continued on for a few minutes, I had dates and times as well as hotels to choose from and then the call was done.

When I hung up, I was feeling a bit on the dizzy side. A lot had happened in the last half hour, and I was taken aback with it all. First things first was calling, Renee. She and I needed to coordinate a weekend to fly out to Chicago, and I needed to call this, Amy woman back and give her our final word. I picked up the phone to call Renee, but when I did, there was a knock on my door. I peeked out the window and there standing on my door steps was the last person in this world I thought would ever be there. It was Renee, herself.


	36. Closure Part 3

I was going to wait until tomorrow to post this, but I just didn't see the point in making you wait. This is where a lot of the past comes clean, and hopefully Bella and Charlie will navigate to some sort of understanding.

Tomorrow I will post another chapter, but for now, enjoy this!

**AND YES! This will be LONGER than 3-5 chapters... just has to be ;)**

* * *

**Charlies POV**

We were sitting in my living room with a blanket of tension covering the both of us. When I had invited Renee in, she seemed almost hesitant. I couldn't understand why though, why else would she have come all the way to Washington... to Forks for that matter and knock on my door for gods sake if she was going to act like she didn't want to?

She had tried making small talk twice now, but I wasn't being too cooperative. I was still lost in my thoughts of having found Bella, so the idea of playing this cat and mouse game with Renee was far from my tolerant zone. I knew I needed to tell her, but something was keeping me from doing just that, I had no idea what it was, but my gut told me to keep my mouth shut.

I watched her take a drink from her water glass, and then soon she was settling into her seat and from the looks of it, preparing to begin.

"I'm sure your wondering why I would just drop in like this... unannounced." She wouldn't look me in the eye, and kept her gaze firmly on the glass in front of her.

I just nodded my head and took a deep breath. I didn't know if I was ready to hear her reason, but either way, it was time that I heard what she had to say. From the looks of her face, I could tell this would not be a pleasant conversation, and as much as I would rather stick a fork in my eye than listen to anything bad, I made myself shut up and listen.

"I came to talk to you about, Bella." I figured that it was going to have something to do with Bella, but hearing her say it out loud did nothing for my nerves. Instantly my mind was wondering if the woman named Amy had called Renee or not. If she had, then I really had no reason to hide what I knew, but still, something was off, and I decided once again to just keep my mouth shut.

"What about her, Renee? Is there something you know? Has anyone contacted you with her whereabouts?"

I saw her face go pale, and then for the first time since she walked into this house, she looked me in the eyes.

"No... but, I do need to tell you the truth before she is found and you hear it from someone else?"

This wasn't going to be good, because in all honesty, when it included Renee, it usually meant bad news. I stayed with my gut and kept my mouth shut about knowing where she was, and signaled with my hands for Renee to begin.

As I sat in my recliner, I listened to a tale of a woman that ran her only daughter off. I heard words like, hate, and angry... things were uttered under her breath like _unfair _and _jealous. _I couldn't believe the way she was describing her relationship with Bella. She had basically abandoned her after she left for college and from the way her face looked, she didn't look all that ashamed.

I felt as if someone had reached into my chest and squeezed my heart when she told me about what she said to her when she was graduating. I had never in my life wanted to hit a woman, but by god, Renee was itching to become the first.

However, as much as I hated Renee right now, I hated myself even more. I knew that what she said had very well killed Bella on the inside, and to add insult to injury, I declined her invitation too. I was in that moment, that I understood what had really happened. Bella had reached her breaking point with us, she saw what a mess we were as parents and more than likely came to terms with the fact that she didn't need us, and then moved on.

As sad as that made me, I was proud of her. I know that sounds weird, but I was proud of her. She had made it out of an Ivy League University all on her own, and at the end of her time there, she was left with a decision to make and instead of punishing herself with pain or obligation, she simply cut the strings and moved on with her life. That to me, was just as significant as her diploma itself.

When Renee's story was done, I sat back and let the sick settle over me. I couldn't even look at her, she was too much to take in at the moment. Of course, she _sounded_ ashamed, but she didn't look it. Instead, she wore a relieved expression and for the first time since her coming inside this house, she cracked a god damn smile. I was sick all over again.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You sit there and tell me you ran off our daughter because you were _jealous_ of her and then you smile? What kind of monster are you?"

That seemed to hit a nerve, because her easy going mood was replaced with a steel expression. She stood up and looked down on me as if I were some disease that she would catch.

"You have _no idea_ what it was like for me to carry that burden around with me for all these years! You have no idea what it was like raising a child that was better than you in virtually everything she did! I was the one who had to live with her, I had to be the one to sacrifice _my life!_ So please do not tell me that I am a monster Charlie, at least I was around."

I was on my feet now, this discussion had gone on far enough. "That is what parents do, Renee! They sacrifice and raise their children! What the hell do you mean you had to watch her act like she was better than you!? The fact she could count was a vast improvement from you, Renee! Besides, your _supposed_ to want your kids to be better than you, that is the point!"

I had far more that I wanted to say, but I couldn't make the words come quick enough. She was just ridiculous and the very idea that she would run Bella off so that she could feel better about herself had me ready to vomit.

All the while, visions of Bella were running through my head right now and all I could think was that seeing Renee was a mistake. I didn't want to see the pain in my daughters eyes as she watched her mother walk back into her life. Based off of what Renee was telling me, I didn't think it was the best idea.

We both stood staring at each other, and suddenly I didn't want her in my home. Renee was no longer welcome here, and I honestly had no desire to look upon her anymore. She needed to leave.

"Leave now, Renee... just get out." I watched her eyes go wide and then she took a deep breath and turned around and headed for the door. She never slowed and before I could tell her to never come back, she was gone.

Amazingly, I felt nothing for that woman. I had for the longest time carried a torch for her, but after all I had heard today, there was nothing left. All I would ever thank her for, was Bella, but she had managed to break even her too.

I flopped onto my recliner and let the information I had just heard settle over me. It was a lot to deal with, and on top of the news, there was a matter of the guilt eating me alive as well. I really hated myself now, before was just a warm up.

With my head in my hands, I let myself begin to plan. I would be going to see my daughter, and that was at least good news that she had agreed to do even that. I felt bad about not telling Renee, but not for her sake, for Bella's. I just didn't think it was a good idea, and Renee didn't seem all that concerned anyway.

I pulled the number from my pocket and dialed Amy so that we could arrange something new. I knew it was Bella's call, but I really hoped she would go along with the new idea.

**EPOV**

Saturday had been dragging on, it seemed like the more we did the more time slowed. I would take peeks at Bella sporadically to get an idea of what she was feeling, but every time I did, she would seem that much less connected to us. It was as if there was a stand in following us around and that stand in had no concept of our family or what we were doing.

I was about ready to jump out of my skin with worry, but then Ethan went to her side and grabbed her hand. It was such an innocent gesture, one he had done countless times, however this particular instance made all the difference. When he grabbed her hand, he looked up into her face with a worry brow and said, "Momma... you're not happy?"

I watched as my Love's face scrunched up in pain and she scooped Ethan off the ground and into her arms, cradling his small body to hers and kissing his cheek.

"No, baby, Momma is _very_ happy! I was just day dreaming I guess..." Ethan's small arms wrapped around her neck and they squeezed each other for a long moment. "All of you make me so very happy, honey. Don't ever think otherwise." And with that, Bella was back.

I felt her hand slide into my palm and as I looked over, she mouthed the word "sorry" and laid her head on my arm and we all continued walking along. I just smiled and kissed her head gently, there was absolutely nothing she needed to be sorry for.

When we had seen a movie, eaten lunch and had a helping of ice cream, we saddled up and headed for home. Emma kept the conversation easy as she told Bella and I about a horse she dreamed about the night before. I held back a laugh as she explained it sparkled and had a clown nose. Emma was just too adorable for words, and the beauty of her innocent mind always calmed my soul.

When we pulled up to the house, Ethan was passed out cold and Emma was close behind him. It was only five o'clock, but we had done so much, that I figured the kids would be out for the night. As much as I hated the idea of letting Bella strain herself lifting either of them, I conceded and made sure to grab Ethan... even though he was younger, he weighed far more than Emma.

We made our way in and each of us prepared the kids for bed and then met out in the hall with big smiles on our faces. We both had realized that it was just the two of us for the rest of the night, and from the look on Bella's face, she had the same plans as I had.

I had just pulled her into my arms and was nibbling on her neck, when the house phone began ringing. I sighed and tried to ignore it, but Bella just laughed and pinched my butt before telling me that we should answer it. I slumped in defeat and hurried down the hall to our room to get it on the third ring, and imagine the surprise I felt when the person on the other line ended up being two people.

**BPOV**

Something was terribly wrong, I could see it all over Edwards face. Not to mention that his body language was stiff and his hand was in his hair. I took a step forward and braced myself for the worst, from the looks of my husband, this was going to be a death more than likely.

My stomach was already turning at this point, but then I saw Edward turn to face me and his words had me confused.

"Put him through." Put who through? Why did Edward look like he was about to pass out? I had all these questions and more running through my head and then suddenly it was upon me.

"This is, Edward Cullen." he said into the receiver. His eyes never left mine and his grip on the handle looked as if the phone would crack under the strain of it. I didn't get to focus on that for too long, because the next part sealed the deal.

"I am Isabella's husband, what can I do for you Mr. Swan?" I didn't hang around for the answer, before I could hear another word, I fled the room and was down the stairs and in the kitchen with in seconds. I had no idea what to think or even what to feel. Actually, that is only half true, I felt like a coward. I ran away before I could have my moment and worst of all, I left my husband in there to do it for me.

Disappointed didn't even cover the way I was feeling in myself, that was just the beginning. Hadn't this been what I wanted? I thought it was, but now faced with a real live call staring me in the face, I turned and ran away. I hated myself in that moment and even more so I hated Charlie. In the course of two days, my careful, happy world had come down around me. All I really wanted was to find my way back to that comfort zone I had lived in from the first time Edward held me in his arms... it seemed so far away now.

I stayed put as a coward in the kitchen for god knows how long, all I knew was that I had started sipping on my third glass of wine when Edward made his way down the stairs and to me with long strides. It wasn't until I was safely in his arms did the reality of what had happened wash over me. Instead of questions, there were sobs. He never tried to shush me, instead he held me quietly and rocked me in his arms until my cries died down.

"Are you ready to talk now, Love? If not just say the word and we will go back to holding each other." Deep green eyes were boring into my brown ones and the fear and panic that was sitting inside of my chest began to melt. As long as I had my love, my Edward... everything would be okay. I took a deep shaky breath and nodded my head yes and before I could say the words aloud, we were walking toward the oversized lounger.

Edward cradled me into his lap and began gentle stokes along my arms to my fingers. We stayed that way for a few moments and then he broke the silence. "As you know, Love, that was your dad." I just nodded my head and kept it tucked into his neck. Edward seemed okay with my response and carried on.

"He called for a few reasons... the first was to let us know that he will be coming here this weekend." My heart actually squeezed and for the tiniest moment, I thought I was having a heart attack.

"He's really excited to be coming, Bella. He said that coming here is like having a dream come true." I felt my sobs starting again as he said that. I didn't know if it was from pain or from disbelief, either way, it was there.

"Why now? Did you ask him that?" My voice was barely audible and it was cracking with every word. This was really the only thing I wanted to know, it was the only thing that mattered to me.

Edward didn't answer right away, and instead he took a few moments as if collecting his thoughts or searching for the right words. When he either found them or had resolve, he told me.

"Charlie said that he was ashamed... of himself." Edwards voice sounded foreign, as if he were in another world completely. It caught my attention and I sat up to see his expression clearly. I regretted it instantly, because the man before me looked torn. His eyes were glossy and his face was twisted in pain.

"Baby?" I whispered to him. Nothing. I tried again and this time he heard me. Edward turned to face me and then cradled my cheek with his hand and spoke gently to me.

"She took you from him... your mom, she lied to both of you." I felt the tears hitting my eyes long before he had even finished that sentence. He lost me at _she took you from him._ I knew already what and who he was talking about.

"Tell me... tell me everything." I sobbed.

I dropped my head back into his neck and together we held one another. I was hurting... and because of it, so was Edward. I felt his tears running down over my face and in turn, I felt his fingers catching my own.

We sat that way far longer than I had intended to, but ten minutes later we were both calm enough to continue. We didn't move positions, nor did we try to speak above a whisper, instead I sat still as I waited for Edward to break the news of what had actually happened.

"Charlie said that when you were about six, your mom left in the middle of the night with you while he was on duty. He said that he found a note from your mom explaining that she wanted a divorce and that when she got settled, she would let him know..."

I let the words settle into me and willed myself to remember something... anything. I did remember waking in the back seat of the car and being cold, but it was such a small memory, that I couldn't remember if it had been the day we left. My only sold memory of being young was when my mom and I lived in a one bedroom in Phoenix. It wasn't much by any standards, and often times I stayed alone because she worked, but that was all I remembered.

I nodded my head for Edward to continue, and so he did. "He said that your mom sent letters throughout the year, not often, but enough to let him know you were both okay. She didn't even fully divorce him until you were about ten or so... well, then he said that Renee told him that you didn't know him, and that it wasn't fair to force a relationship when you didn't even remember him."

I was sick all over again, my tears were coming faster and harder now as the reality of what my mother had done sank in. I was robbed of my father, and of my home. Renee had taken me away without even asking my opinion. On top of that she hadn't even given me the chance to know my own father, I hated her.

Edwards voice interrupted my thoughts, "Baby, do you want to hear more, or are you done for the night?"

I shook my head no and answered him, "No, please... I want to know... I _need_ to know." That was all my love needed to hear, so he continued rubbing my arm and telling the story.

"I know that I don't know either or them, Love, and honestly its your call on what you want to believe, but I... I believe every word he told me." Edward met my eyes and all I saw there was honesty, if what he had heard was good enough for him, then it was good enough for me too. I may not trust Charlie and Renee, but I trust Edward. Mind, body and soul.

"Well, Charlie went on to tell me that after you had gotten accepted into Yale, that you called him... and it was the first time he had talked to you since you were maybe eleven. He said that he felt bad that he didn't have the money to help you for college, but that you didn't ask him for anything. It shocked him and he had no clue why you were calling him, but then you said you wanted him to know that you made it in... that was the proudest day of his life he said, well... up until he received your graduation announcement that is."

I sat straight up in Edwards arms and cried out in frustration and pain, "Then why didn't he come?! It meant so much to me, Edward... and nobody was there..." It was the first time I had ever admitted what that painful reality. I was ashamed of it, it made my achievement less real because I had no one to share it with, no one there to witness that moment in my life where I achieved something. I had always felt that way, but this was my first time saying it aloud.

"I'm so sorry, love. I can't imagine what that must have felt like... I'm so sorry!" and he was, he genuinely was. I could see that clearly as I looked into my husbands watery eyes. It pained him and because of that it pained me all over again. The way we loved each other was causing the circle of pain to go round and round, and it was doing nothing for my fragile heart.

"I asked him that very question though... and he told me that he wanted to go, wanted to go _so badly_, but that he was ashamed... ashamed of the way he had failed you. Charlie told me that he couldn't face the other parents who had _raised_ there children... he felt like you only invited him out of obligation, that's why."

My mouth was hanging open in shock while I looked on from Edwards lap. This was like a horrible soap opera, or even a really bad TLC show being aired on live television. I didn't know what to say to that confession, it was so real and honest that I had no choice but to believe it. I was still taking that last part in when I felt Edward shift beneath me.

"Baby, he called for another reason..." he hinted.

"W-what else is there?" I asked with a cautious tone. Edward took my hand into my own and rubbed my fingers while he prepared to tell me the rest.

"After you graduated, he wanted to make it up to you that he hadn't gone, and called your mom for your address..."

I felt my brow furrow as I heard that last part. I knew there was no way she gave him one, because she and I had already had our falling out long before graduation day. As far as she knew, I graduated and then was chopped up into a shoe box and buried. Edward read this expression clearly on my face and proceeded slowly.

"When he called, Renee, she told him you wanted time to your self and that you called her and said not to look for you... that you wanted to live on your own and explore who you were..."

Anger seeped through my veins at this statement, and what I thought was hate before had now been trumped by an all consuming rage. How dare she!? What the... and... then to tell... Ugh!!!!

"All this time he thought you wanted nothing to do with him... but then just recently he called Renee and demanded she tell him where you were... she told him she hadn't spoken to you in years, and he flipped! He couldn't believe that she had just let that be as if you were on a holiday... he feared you were stuck in prison in some country, and that's why he hired, Amy."

My heart actually felt as if it would jump out of my chest as the story played out in my head. Renee had lied to _all of us._ I felt robbed... cheated.

I would never get that time back, all that time she had stolen from me, and there wasn't a judge or jury powerful enough to ever give it back. In that moment a large part of me died that day, I couldn't even cry... I wanted to, but I couldn't. Instead I let Edward hold me, and together we let the reality of my life settle between us.

I had lived my entire adult life hating my father and all along it was for nothing. I couldn't believe my mother had done this, couldn't believe she would think this would never come out. She caused so much pain with her lies, and on top of that, it didn't only involve me... I had two sleeping children up stairs, tucked tightly in their beds and dreaming good dreams, and now they would be in the middle of this mess too.

Renee had robbed _my_ kids now... robbed them of a grandpa, robbed them of Christmas and birthday presents, and tomorrow morning, Edward and I would have to explain to them that they had another grandpa... and as much as I hated it... a grandma.

They would be confused no doubt, Esme and Carlisle were all they had ever known, and trust me when I say that I was more than fine with that. But now, no, now I had to let them know the truth and do my best to make this as easy a step as possible. It was in that thought, that the main question I needed to ask hadn't been voice yet. I turned fully in Edwards arms again and he met my eyes.

"Does he know we have children?" I asked in a small, scared voice. The pain that shot through his eyes made my stomach turn once more but when he shook his head no, my heart joined on ahead with it.

Well that was just perfect, great! Not only did I get married, but I had kids... I had an entire lifetime of things that he would discover in a weekend. Suddenly I found myself feeling very bad for Charlie, not just because of me, but because of everything. What a horrible way to find out that your a grandpa, no set up for exciting news, or even a fun grandparents day card... no. Charlie was going to just have to walk in a room and wait until Ethan or Emma looked to Edward or I and said Momma or Daddy.

"It's not right..." I choked out. I couldn't let that happen, I may not have had control of our past, but I had complete control of the now. I would not allow either Charlie or my kids to experience that. They deserved better than that, they all did. I was off of Edwards lap in an instant, he followed right after and was holding my waist to his chest.

"Talk to me baby, what do you need? What do we need to do? I'll do anything, Love, anything at all." His voice was sincere and soft. This was hurting him too, and in that instant I fell in love with him all over again. He was my complete other half, my everything. I turned in his arms and kissed him gently for a long drawn out moment and when I felt his fingers tracing my cheek bone, I pulled back to see his eyes.

"I would like to call my father" I stated proudly. A small smile lit up his face and after a small kiss to my nose, he turned us and led us up the stairs to our room. When we walked in, Edward made his way to his night stand and pulled out a small note pad from the drawer.

"Here is the number, Love." He placed the pad in my hands and then cupped my chin for a second. "Would you like for me to stay in here with you? Or would you rather have some privacy?"

I had to think about it, I wasn't sure if I wanted him to leave my side, but a wave of calm washed over me and it made my decision for me. "I think I would like to do this alone... if you don't mind." Edward just smiled and shook his head gently to me.

"I don't mind, Love." and with that, he kissed my forehead and made his way out of the room shutting the door behind him. I took a deep breath and grabbed the cordless from the cradle and began punching in the numbers one by one. I did it so cautiously, doing my best not to hit the wrong button with my shaky fingers. When the last number was dialed, I took a deep breath and waited for the line to pick up.

I almost hung up, but then he answered, my father answered the phone. "Hello?" he asked. I forgot how to talk for a moment, but when he repeated it, I snapped from my daze.

"Uh... yes, Charlie... I mean, Dad. This is Bella." I waited for a response, but when I didn't get one, I began to panic. I feared that I had just talked into one of those ridiculous answering machine tricks, and just as I was about to hit end, he spoke.

"Isabella? Is that really you?" he questioned. I couldn't help but smile as I heard the hope in his voice, he really did want me, he wanted me as a daughter... I wasn't unworthy like the way I had felt all those years ago.

"It's me... I-I uh, I wanted to call you and talk to you for a little bit... we have some things that we need to catch up on. Things I want you to know before you come down this weekend. Would that be okay with you?"

"It's fine, Bells. You can tell me any old thing you want. I'm just so darn glad that it's really you..." I heard his voice breaking and it caused the tears in my eyes to spill over. This was going to be the hardest conversation I had ever had, and given the past Edward and I shared, that was really saying something.

So for the next hour and a half, I told Charlie the last thirteen years of my life. He heard it all, from freshman year at Yale to the birth of Emma and Ethan. I heard the breaks in his breathing when I told him of mine and Edwards wedding, then again as I gave him the news about being a grandpa twice over. It was more than I could have hoped for, and it was just a phone call. I still had an entire weekend ahead of me and he would be here, in my home.


	37. Closure Part 4

**Charlies POV**

Ever notice that the more nervous you are about something, the faster it comes around? Well that was my reality as I made my way outside Chicago, Midway Airport. I had managed to be one of the first persons off of the plane, mostly because I was seated in first class and we got to get out the doors quicker. Had I not thought the others would gawk at me, I would have waited for the entire plane to clear before I even stood.

It wasn't that I didn't want to see, Bella, it was that I didn't know what to expect. When we talked last week, it was wonderful... well... mostly wonderful to just hear her voice. The hard part was taking in all the years of her life I had missed out on. I listened on for over an hour about her husband and her children, _my grandchildren_ and the life she was leading. I wanted to cry as I listened to details about her wedding and even her pregnancies with the kids. It was a hard thing to sit through, not because I didn't want to hear it, but because I had missed it. Worst of all, I hadn't missed it on my own accord, but I was robbed of it.

I thought of all the things I wanted to say to my daughter as I waited in front of the baggage claim for my suitcases to spin around on the belt. Unsurprisingly, they were the first two to swing out on the the cart. I took a deep breath, looked up at the sky and nodded. It was as if the big guy upstairs was telling me to get a move on. So I did.

Bella said that Edward would make arrangements for me to have a car when I arrived, so I made my way over to the counter and checked in for my rental. It was as if I were a king, because as soon as they took my last name and social, I was being served up with sir's and courtesy faster than I could blink. I was offered any vehicle I wanted and the man named Andrew behind the counter went as far as asking if I needed assistance to the vehicle. I was more than shocked by the courtesy, because I had rented cars before, and it was nothing like the service I was getting at the moment.

I made my way out to the lot and plopped my things in the back of a luxury SUV. It was the closest thing to a truck I could find, so I just went with it and didn't complain. As soon as I was in, I picked up my cell and dialed the one number I was dreading. After three rings, a very winded Bella answered the phone.

"Hello?" she huffed into the phone. I just smiled, because it was nice to hear her voice again.

"Hey, Bell's, just wanted to let you know that I landed and that I'm heading out to your place now. Just wanted to go over the directions one last time." I heard how nervous I sounded, but I didn't dwell on it, Bella and I went over the directions one last time and she made me promise to call if I got lost. I gave her my word and before I could cower out of it, I began the forty five minute drive to my daughters home.

* * *

After an hour of driving and two pit stops for directions, I pulled up to a large wrought iron gate. The name _Cullen_ was written in script in the center and another long road lay waiting behind it. I sat in the car just looking at the gate for a few moments, I needed time to take in the beauty of just the gate that adorned their home. I had no idea what home she was living in or even how she was living, but judging from the homes I passed on my way up here, and the cars I passed on the small path I had just come up, I knew it was more than I had let myself imagine. When I was sure I could actually drive again, I rolled down the window and hit the call button. Two long beeps later, a male voice answered and I almost choked on my words. I didn't know if this was my son in law on the other end, but either way, I wasn't as prepared to speak as I had thought I was.

"Cullen residence" the voice said from the black box in front of my face. I opened my mouth and closed it a few times and then finally the words came out.

"Uh yeah, this is Charlie Swan, for Isabella Swa... I mean Cullen?" It was still hard for me to remember that she was now married and had a new last name. All this time she had remained Isabella Swan in my mind, when in reality she let that person go and became Mrs. Isabella Cullen. It made the tears brim to my eyes once more.

"Ah! Yes, Charlie. I'll open the gates right up! Just follow the drive to the main house and park in the front, Bella and I will meet you out there." the man said back to me.

Like an idiot, I just nodded. Forgetting that a black box couldn't very well see my agreeing head shake. I rolled my eyes at my self and made my way up the drive as the gates opened up for me. I felt stupid, but I also felt good that Bella had some form of protection around her house. Her husband had at least made sure their home was safe for her and the kids.

As the drive in front of me opened up, so did the view of their home. I almost came to a stand still when I saw the full vision, it was an unbelievable sight. My little girl was living like a queen, and the only emotion I could feel was pure and utter happiness. She had the home I never gave her, the home Renee never gave her. I found myself anxious to meet the man that had made her his, I only hoped he was everything she deserved and more. I could only hope that that was the case.

When I pulled my eyes away from the house, I noticed the two people standing at the top of the stairs in front of the door. I made myself look a second time with more concentration. The woman standing there was in the arms of a man around 6'2, she was beautiful. Long brown hair was curled in large rings and framed her face that was lit up with absolute love and adoration. It was my Bella, but she wasn't looking at me, she was looking into the eyes of the man holding her, and he was watching her with the same love she was showing him. I made myself look away, because it seemed to private a thing to watch, and I didn't want to intrude on that moment.

When I pulled to a stop, I took a deep breath and then opened my door. I walked around the front and went to stand at the bottom of the steps. When I finally brought my gaze up to meet the two of them, I nearly fell over from the emotions that rocked through me. The eyes that met mine were a mirror of my own... for the first time in a long time, I was looking into the eyes of my daughter... my little girl. My breath hitched and I took a step forward to begin the climb of the stairs.

"Bell's..." it was all I could get out. Her eyes were wet and her face held a look of wonder. I didn't waste another second and jogged up the rest of the way to greet her. Before I reached the top, there were arms around my neck and they were gripping me tightly.

"Daddy" she whispered in a strangled voice. That did me in and the tears I had been fighting were making their way down my cheeks, but I didn't care.

"I missed you, kid... so much." I told her. I felt her nodding her head and heard her sniffling into my shoulder.

"I missed you too..." she replied. So there we stood, father and daughter, both in pain, but in joy as well. This was many years in the making, and I for one couldn't wait for the catching up to begin.

**BPOV**

It was as if I were in a dream state and everything around me wasn't real. In my head I knew all of this was happening, but I just couldn't let my heart believe it yet. So much time had gone by since I had last seen my father, and on top of that so much had changed. He looked older, more tired and worn out. I always remembered him as young looking and stressed. It seems as if the years had caught up with him. Not to say that he didn't look well, just that time had really gone on and that he aged along with it.

After my initial cling fest on the steps, I managed to pull back and gain some composure. I went back into Edwards arms and peace and tranquility over took my body. He had that effect on me and I was grateful for the sense of security in which he provided me with just his love alone. I knew that as long as he was with me, I could get through this without falling apart. I took a deep breath and looked up at my love, he was watching me with a gentle smile on his face, and I took that time to introduce him to Charlie.

"Dad, this is my husband, Edward." I squeezed my love's arms while I said it and then looked over to Charlie to make sure he had heard me. He had.

His eyes were wet again and he took a deep breath which made him look taller. He extended his hand out to Edward and I felt Edward press his lips to my temple and then move around me. He took my fathers hand into his and they shook as an introduction.

"Edward Cullen, it's nice to finally meet you Chief Swan." I smiled wider at the way Edward looked. I had never seen him more sure of himself than I had in that moment and from the look on Charlies face, I could see he saw it as well.

"Please, call me Charlie, Son." I wrapped my arms around Edward again and listened as he obliged to Charlies wishes. After the initial meeting was done, I led the three of us into the house so that Charlie could get settled and we could all be more comfortable.

As soon as we stepped in, I heard a low whistle and turned to see my dad taking in the vision of our home. He spun around slowly as if taking each angle in at a time. I just laughed quietly and stepped forward, "Would you like a tour?"

His eyes popped over to me and a small smile tugged at his lips. "I would love to see your home, Bella." was his response. I looked over to Edward and he watched my face for a moment, no doubt gauging if I wanted to do it alone or if I needed him with me. I knew I wanted Edward with me so I squeezed his fingers and without a second of hesitation, he was kissing my cheek and walking with me to the stair case. I turned back to Charlie and signaled him with my head to follow us.

The first room we went to was on the left and was my office. Even thought I didn't write for a living anymore, I still did it as a hobby. These days I used the nights Edward was on call at the hospital to do most of it, other wise my nights were spent in bed with my husband. I walked in, and my dad followed along behind me. I looked back at the door and saw Edward leaning against the frame watching me with a smile. I smiled back and turned again to my father.

"This is my office, Edward had it designed for me when we were having the house built... I was a writer at the time for the Chicago Tribune and then for an online political site. Now a days I write as a hobby and use this for some quiet time when I need it, all the same though, this is where all my ideas and writings are born."

I gestured around the open room and watched as Charlie walked to the far wall and stood in front of my Diploma from Yale. Edward had it matted and framed when we moved in here and Esme made sure to hang it along side a picture that Paul had taken of me when I was graduating and shaking hands with the Dean of Fine Arts. Charlie just stood there with his hands in his pockets admiring the framed moment and alternating to the Degree along side it.

I wasn't really sure if it was something I should bring up or if I should let him have his moment uninterrupted. I looked back at Edward and there he stood stoic and proud. He was watching Charlie and then turned his head back to me. He smiled and mouthed _I love you_ to me and pushed off the wall slowly as if he was going to leave. I was about to stop him and he paused taking in my reaction, but then I took a deep breath and nodded to him that it was okay for him to go. When he was gone from the door I turned back to my dad, and he was still in the same position.

I walked up and stood right along side him in silence for a moment. I looked at the photo that was capturing my fathers full attention. I stared at it with him for a long while and then started to speak without really knowing what I wanted to say.

"That was the hardest four years of my entire life." I began, "I wasn't sure I belonged there for the entire first year, I felt so out of place... so different."

I turned to him and he stayed with his eyes focused on the picture and nodded, so I continued. "I worked hard every day, studied every night and crammed for every test I had... I didn't date, or go to parties... I didn't really live while I was a student there." I laughed humorlessly at my own words but was interrupted by Charlie.

"Why? I mean... why didn't you take time to enjoy college Bell's? Were you struggling in your classes?"

I smiled and shook my head no. I kept my eyes on the diploma now as I spoke the next part, "I was determined to prove her wrong... that's the only thing I could focus on." I heard my voice breaking as I said it. It was a hard thing to admit to, but it felt good at the same time. I took another deep breath and held back my tears so I could continue.

"When I got into Yale, I told mom and she told me that I didn't belong there... that I wasn't smart enough to make it four years at an Ivy League school. She told me that it wasn't for people like me and that I would more than likely fail out at some point."

I turned to my dad then, and his face was a mixture of confusion and pain. I just smiled and turned back to the picture and took it off the wall. I held it in my hands for a moment and instead of seeing me shaking the deans hand and smiling, I saw the Yale tower in the background. I looked harder and saw the tree in which I studied under when my roommate had friends over that were too loud. I saw the hard work and the sleepless nights I went through my first two years, because I was afraid that Renee was going to be right. I literally killed myself for two years just trying to get her acceptance and support... it never came though, because the better I did, the farther apart we grew.

"I worked hard ever day that I was a student at Yale, I did it because I didn't want to be what Renee said I was going to be, I didn't want to be a statistic or even a failure... and honestly dad... I did it for you too."

He turned to me then and I saw the tears rolling down his cheeks. I couldn't see as clearly anymore, my tears were taking up too much space in my own eyes. I wiped my eyes and when I could see clearly again, I handed Charlie the picture. He looked at me with question for a moment but then looked down at it in wonder.

"I...I wanted you to be proud of me... I wanted you to be proud to tell people that I was your daughter." My voice was breaking and I saw he was going to say something, but I kept going, I needed him to hear this. "I'm a good person... I am a law abiding citizen. I have never been in trouble with the law and I have never done drugs. I went to college and graduated Summa Cum Laude with a degree in Journalism from one of the finest Ivy League schools in the country. I am your daughter... and I hope I have made you proud, even if you weren't there to see it all. I did it all for you."

My voice shook the entire time and it broke through each word I said them, but when the last sentence was out, I was wrapped in my fathers arms and together we cried.

"I have always been proud of you, Bell's... always! And your are more than a good person... your a _great_ person, your my _favorite_ person! I love you, kid... and I'm sorry that I wasn't there... I should have been, but I wasn't and I'm sorrier than you can ever know."

Just hearing that he was always proud was enough for me, but when he acknowledged that he should have been there, a piece of my broken heart fell back into place. I didn't know I needed to hear that until he said it, but now it was as if those words were what was missing from this reunion. I pulled back and did my best to right myself. Charlie let me have a moment and when I was composed, he continued on. "I don't know how to make this better, Bella. I don't know if that is even what you want right now... but I hope that we can have some form of a relationship, I just want to know my daughter."

I was nodding my head yes already before he even finished his sentence. This is what he was here for, what we were all trying to do. I just wanted to know my father... I wanted my husband to know him, and for my children to have their grandpa. "We will get there, we just need some time to adjust to each other... okay?"

Charlie squeezed me tight for a moment and then stepped back and admired the picture in his hands. Tears were still streaming down my cheeks as he took in the photo once more. I was trying to calm down, but it was useless. I was about to excuse myself and go find Edward, but before I even thought to vocalize the words, I felt Edwards arms wrap around me and hold me to him tightly. I turned in his arms and rested my head against his chest while he rubbed soothing strikes along my back.

"I'm so proud of you baby" he whispered into my ear. I was honestly proud of myself too, I had finally said the words that I ached to say for years. My father knew now, knew that I accomplished things and turned out to be a good person. I just wanted that one moment, and I had finally gotten it.

I turned back to face my father once more so I could continue the tour. "Dad... would you like to see the rest of the house?" His head popped up and he nodded his head yes. He went to hand me the picture in his hands, but I just shook my head no. "You keep that, I have a copy."

Charlie took a deep breath and nodded his head while he kept a firm hold on the frame. Edward led us out of the room and together we walked my father into the eight rooms that made up the top floor. When we had gone into the kids rooms, Charlie was crying again. Not blubbering or anything, just silent tears that signified his pain in not knowing them.

Both Ethan, and Emma were with Carlisle and Esme right now. Edward and I had decided together that it would be best for he and I to have some time alone with Charlie. Not that we didn't trust him, but we didn't know what to expect. That being said, we didn't want the kids feeling awkward or uncomfortable about the situation either, so that was our driving force behind that decision. Everyone would be joining us tonight for dinner, and when I say everyone, I mean the entire Cullen family. Jasper had taken vacation from work this week and next and so did Edward. Carlisle made arrangements to be on call for sever emergencies that would require his assistance, and Esme basically told her employees to call only if Apocalypse was about to happen.

With the top floor done, we headed down the stairs and we made our way from dining rooms, to the kitchen, and dens. We ended our tour in Edwards office, and again Charlie was captivated by the pictures that adorned the walls.

I turned to my love and saw the small smile playing at his lips, he loved being in his office when the kids and I were away he said, because all our best memories were hanging in there for him to look at. He said it made the work easier to focus on when you have your sole purpose for living staring back at you while you do your job. I understood that, and it seemed that Charlie was about to.

Edward spoke up this time around. "This is my office, Charlie." he began walking toward the fire place where Charlie was standing. His gaze resting upon the large matted portrait from our wedding day. Edward stood beside him for a moment in silence while he took in the picture himself. After a minute went by, Edward, broke the silence again.

"That was the greatest day of my life... marrying Bella." he said in a calm voice. I saw Charlie's head bop up and down as he continued looking at the picture. Edward went on. "Bella has given me everything I could have ever hoped for and more, Charlie. She is my entire life... her and the kids. I wake each day for them and rest each night to provide for them all. There isn't anything in this world I wouldn't do for any of them... nothing I wouldn't be for the woman who took my last name."

I had tears rolling down my face again. Edward wasn't saying anything he hadn't already told me countless times, but the significance of him telling my father was what got me. He was assuring Charlie that we were loved and cared for. He was giving him that peace as an offering, and olive branch of sorts in the sense that it should have been done before we were married. I loved my husband more for that simple gesture he was giving my father.

I watched Charlie turn to face Edward as he spoke. "I can see that you love her... a blind man could see it." Edward's smile widened as he listened to my fathers rationalization, and Charlie continued on. "Your a better man than me, Edward. Your a better father than I ever was... thank you."

Edwards face was thoughtful for a moment, no doubt searching for the perfect words to share with my father. "We all love in different way's, Charlie. Just because you weren't able to share your way every day doesn't mean that you didn't love unconditionally while she was gone. I'm sure Bella was in your thoughts often." I smiled at the words he offered Charlie. Charlie seemed to appreciate it as well.

"Everyday... I thought of my little girl every day. Sometimes I would be raking the yard or driving down the road and I would see her in my head. I imagined all the things she would of done with her life... all the ways she may have found happiness. I could only hope that she was happy, an alternate wasn't something I was willing to let myself imagine. It would have been my worst nightmare."

I walked up at that point, I wanted Charlie to hear it from me that I lived a good life. "I have been very happy, Dad. Even before Edward, I was happy." Charlie just nodded his head and went back to the wedding picture.

I could see he wanted to ask me about life after Yale and before Edward, but something was keeping him from doing it. I decided to rip the band aide off myself and say it for him. "When I graduated Yale, I moved here to Chicago. I lived with Grandma Swan's friend, Donna... remember her?" Charlie looked at me with shock as he nodded his head in wonder. "Well I stayed with her while I job hunted, and after a few months, I landed a job at the Tribune. Donna insisted that I stay with her longer so I could save some money, and after some strong arming, I did.

Charlie turned to me and gave me his full attention, so I began walking with Edward to the couches that were off to the side. I curled up with Edward as Charlie sat across from us and listened intently. " I was an entry level staff writer for the first two years, and soon after my second year ended, I was promoted to staff writer" I rolled my eyes at and smiled at the less than distinguished titles the tribune had. It was funny now that I said it aloud. Edward just kissed my head and chuckled with me. Charlie just smiled and waited for me to carry on.

I told him about my condo and the things I did for fun at the time. Charlie audibly laughed along with me and Edward as I told him of the one salsa class I attended for fifteen minutes and then high tailed it out of after some guy tried to do some dirty dancing move on me. I went on and on about trips and work, when I looked up to see his face again the humor was gone. I looked over to Edward and his brow was confused as well. I looked back to Charlie and his gaze was on his hands.

"Dad? Is everything okay? Did I say something wrong?" I had no idea when the atmosphere changed, but I could feel the shift in his mood. Edwards mood had shifted now as well, I felt him pulling me into his side tighter, and his body was tense and protective.

"Charlie" he stated in a tense voice. I heard the underlying anger in his voice, and I knew this could get ugly if Charlie answered with anything other than the truth, thankfully honesty was in the cards. Charlie looked up and the severity of his face was gone and replaced with sadness. He met my eyes and asked a question I wasn't prepared to answer.

"You haven't said a word about Holiday's, Bella. What did you do for Christmas and Thanksgiving those years before you were married?"

**EPOV**

I couldn't believe that I had never asked this question myself. Since Bella had been in my life, we shared our Holiday's with my family, _our_ family. I now understood why the shift in Charlies mood was so grim. He was afraid of the same thing I now was. He was afraid that she had been alone and that she had no one to celebrate with.

I looked over to Bella and saw her face was flushed, it meant she was embarrassed. I secured Bella into my arms a bit tighter and she dropped her head into my chest. I looked over to Charlie and he watched us with a pained expression. I kissed Bella's head and whispered to her. "Baby? You don't have to..." she sat up then and shook her head _no_ signaling that she wanted to answer. She took a deep breath and looked to Charlie head on.

"In college I stayed on campus and studied in my dorm. I was taking some very intense classes so it worked out for the best anyway. I probably wouldn't of been able to afford going home had I been invited anyway..."

I felt my chest tighten at her words, she spoke them so low that I had to strain to hear them. I heard Charlie breathing raggedly as if it were taking everything he had to accomplish the task.

"You spent your holidays in a dorm by yourself?" He whispered to her. When he said it that way, I felt the pain shooting through my heart as I imagined a young Bella alone at an empty school. No friends, or family to share a turkey or presents with. I hated Renee with a force much greater than I had before, and I knew I would never welcome her into our home for even a moments time. She would never be allowed to set foot in our home as long as I was living and breathing.

Bella picked up where she left off. "I spent my college years that way, but when I graduated and moved out on my own, I would spend my holidays out in shelters volunteering. I can honestly tell you that I felt no pitty for myself after having seen people without as much as a home to go to afterward. It had become such a regular thing for me that I never gave it a second thought after the first year."

"You are a far stronger person than I am, Isabella. You are the epitome of a strong, independent woman. All that aside though, I am sorry for having never reached out to you sooner. You were always wanted and welcome at home with me, sweetheart. But I guess I dropped the ball on letting you know that. I'll never forgive myself for that, but I hope we can build new memories from this point forward."

Bella just smiled and nodded her head. She looked over to me and winked at me as I watched her face carefully and with love. She was everything Charlie described and more, and no matter how many years went by, I would never be able to show her enough what she meant to me.

When that was behind us, Bella and I walked with Charlie around the room and told him funny stories about each picture that hung proudly on the walls. He studied the kids pictures the longest, even longer than our wedding photo or even Bella's graduation picture. I could always see Bella in Emma's face, but now looking at Charlie, I could see hints of him as well. He was anxious to meet the kids and to be honest, we were anxious for that moment as well.

Ethan and Emma both knew that Bella's dad was coming for the first time and as you could guess they had tons of questions about why they had never met him before. Bella and I did our best to explain the situation, and at the end of the day, the kids knew that it had to do with distance. That was good enough for Bella and I, so we dropped it and tried to not make such a big deal about it around the kids.

My family on the other hand, well that was a different story. My dad was more than protective when it came to the kids and Bella, so much so that I found myself trying to calm his nerves when in turn it should have been reversed. I knew it was because of the history Bella and I had that made him nervous, and I would be lying if I said I didn't feel the same way.

Jasper and Alice were our saving graces when it came to all of this, because each had such positive things to say and were constantly reassuring us that this would be okay. Alice was happy that Bella would now get this closure, no matter what form it came in, and Jasper was the same way.

Now the glue that kept us from ripping our hair out and having mental breakdowns, was my mom. She was the one who kept our eyes on the prize and reminded us constantly that as much as we were Bella's family, that Charlie was her father. That being said, she made sure we all understood that no matter what the outcome, our only job was to back Bella's feelings and let her know that we were behind her one hundred percent.

About an hour after we had stepped into the study, we made our way out to the main room and I followed Charlie outside to get his bags. When we were outside and alone, he turned to me.

"Edward... I- I just want to thank you again for inviting me here. I can see that Bella loves you very much and that you adore her as well. Thank you for taking such good care of her." I felt my body swelling with pride as he said those words to me. I strivef everyday to give Bella the world and in turn I did everything in my power to show her I love her. Hearing her father who hadn't seen her in many years confirm that it was an obvious thing, made me proud.

"This means a lot to her, Charlie. I can honestly tell you, that as long as she and I have been together, she has wanted for nothing, she never will. But this... what your doing for her by just being here is something I could not give her. Thank you for doing this."

When we were done with the hard stuff, we each grabbed a bag and I led him to his room down stairs. We figured that it would be more comfortable for him down here in the farthest guest room in case the kids were up late or early and making noise. He didn't seem to mind and I left him to his things and made my way to find my love.

I walked into the kitchen and found her seasoning and tenderizing the meats for dinner. She was still the most beautiful woman I had ever laid my eyes on and it never failed to amaze me how in love with her I was. I walked in and wrapped my arms around her waist and peppered her cheek with kisses and snuggled into her neck.

"I love you, baby." I whispered into her skin. I heard her giggling and felt her shoulder pull up from the way my breath tickled her neck. I couldn't help but try harder to snuggle back into her.

"How are you feeling? Still doing strong?" I asked her. Her brown curls were bouncing up and down along with her nod and I felt her lips on my cheek.

"I'm fine as long as I have you... nothing can hurt me with you around, love. I always feel that way." she said confidently. I wanted to do many things for her in that moment, but knowing that her father was in the room twenty paces away had me holding back, and for the first time since he arrived, I was irritated with his presence.

I was still wracking my brain with ways to find some alone time with Bella when I looked up and saw Charlie walking into the kitchen. I didn't move from my spot, instead I settled back into Bella's neck and watched as she finished up the food for the oven. I only moved when I felt her shifting to put the dish in the oven, and I grabbed it from her and did it instead. All the while Charlie watched us doing our routine and kept silent as we talked amongst each other about the rest to be done. Bella and I would joke now and then and every few minutes I would have her bursting in a fit of giggles as I tried to imitate Julia Childs voice.

Charlie sat at the counter and watched in silence as we bantered back and forth about simple or ridiculous things. He never joined us vocally, but he laughed a lot with us. I was glad to see that Bella wasn't feeling awkward or even nervous anymore. It seemed that she had gotten the hardest parts out of the way already, and was now able to focus on the best parts of this visit.

At one point in our routine, Bella glanced up at the clock and saw it was nearly six o'clock. I heard her breath hitch and when I looked at her, her mouth was hanging open.

"What is it, love?" she didn't answer me, but instead went and rinsed her hands and picked up the phone. She was mumbling something but I couldn't understand a word she was saying. I waited for her to calm down and when she did she was speaking into the phone.

"Alice? Hey! Um, I completely lost track of time, and I'm not going to have time to make a desert. Can you and Jas pick up a cheese cake on your way over?" I started laughing in relief as I listened to her words. She was such a perfectionist when it came to family dinners, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes and smile at Charlie. He looked at me with question, and I just jumped in so I could fill him in.

"Bella is a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to having dinner at our house with the whole family." I said in an easy tone. Charlie's eyes widened and his mouth was open a little. It had completely slipped my mind to tell him that he would be meeting the entire Cullen family, but after one look at his face, I could see that was not something I should have been remiss about.

"I'm so sorry, Charlie. We completely forgot to tell you that the rest of our family would be joining us tonight. It's going to be my mother and father, My sister and her finance Jasper... and of course Emma and Ethan will be here as well."

He recovered from his panic and nodded his head with a yes. "I.. um, better go get cleaned up then." he said looking down at what he was wearing. He was dressed more than appropriately, with a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, but then I noticed what I was wearing and I could see why he would feel uneasy. I had on dark jeans and a dress shirt, no doubt my dad and Jasper would be in something similar.

He didn't wait around, and instead made his way back toward his room and shut the door. I heard Bella hang up the phone and she was instantly by my side.

"What happened?" she asked in a worried voice. I kissed her head and shook it to signal nothing.

"We forgot to tell, Charlie, that everyone was joining us tonight, he felt the need to shower and change before dinner." Bella was frowning and I knew it was because she felt bad for his reaction. I pulled her chin up gently and placed a kiss to her lips, "It's not that big a deal, love. He recovered after the initial shock, and when he comes back out, I'm sure he'll be in the frame of mind to deal with things."

With that said, Bella made her way upstairs to change as well, and I took one last look around the house to tidy up before everyone arrived.

**BPOV**

By the time I was down stairs, Esme and Carlisle had arrived with the kids. Esme had dressed them rather nicely for our small dinner party, and I was surprised to see that Ethan was doing his best not to get wrinkles or change. I raised an eyebrow to Emse and she smiled and winked at me.

Ethan ran into my arms and I couldn't help but hug him tighter to me for a long moment. I hated being away from him and Emma, and anytime I had to, I missed them immensely. I felt Ethan loosening his grip on me; his code for "Let me down" and I frowned a bit. Against my wishes, I placed him on his feet and watched him run up the stairs, no doubt going to his room for a toy.

I heard Carlisle calling out to me, and I turned to find him waiting near the back patio doors. I walked over to him and we stepped out onto the deck to speak alone. When the door was shut I met my father in-laws eyes and was pleased to see absolute warmth there.

"I just wanted to have a moment alone with you, Bella. I know that tonight is going to be a bit awkward for a while, and I just wanted to make sure that you were doing alright."

I smiled and wrapped him in a tight hug then released him and stood back to take a deep breath. "It was defiantly hard earlier when he arrived, but Edward and I have spoken to him about a lot of the things that were making this hard for me. I actually feel a lot better about things now."

Carlisle smiled brightly and nodded his head. "I'm glad, Bella. I just wanted to make sure that you were okay, and to tell you that we are all behind you one hundred percent." His words were genuine and rang true, it reminded me of when Edward and I had gone through that dark period in our relationship, and Carlisle told me that if he couldn't appreciate me, then he didn't deserve me.

I heard the door open, and there waiting for me was, Edward. "Baby, your dad just came out, he looks a little nervous, so I thought I would come and get you."

I nodded my head and smiled to him before turning back to, Carlisle and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, Dad." With that, I turned back to Edward and together we made our way inside to get the evening started.

When we made it into the living room, Charlie was standing in the doorway to his room watching the family scatter about the room to get dinner out to the table. I had never been more grateful for the large family table we purchased when we designed the house, because when we got together like this, it definitly came in handy to hold all the food platters.

Just as I was approaching Charlie, Emma and Ethan ran up to him. I stopped in my tracks momentarily, but then picked back up to my destination when I saw the look of shock cross my fathers face. Ethan being the eternal questioner went straight in for the kill.

"Are you my grandpa?" He asked with a hint of confusion. I felt Edwards arm around my waist and together we walked up to do damage control. Charlie looked up with relief in his eyes when he saw the two of us standing together. Edward picked up Ethan and Emma came to stand in front of me with her eyes trained in Charlies face.

Edward was the first to break the silence. "Yes, Ethan, this is your grandpa Charlie. He's your mommas daddy." My nerves were getting the best of me and I could feel my fingers shaking as I watched Charlies face for signs that this was making him uncomfortable. I found only wonder as he stared into his grandsons eyes. After a moment of silence Charlie looked to Edward as if silently asking persmission and then held out his hands to reach for Ethan.

When he took Ethan into his arms I saw the tears from earlier return. It wasn't everyday you got to meet your grandson for the first time, and on top of that he was seeing me after many years apart. Charlie last remembered me as a pre-teen, but the only real memories he had of me were at Ethan's age right now. I heard his breath hitch as Ethan pulled back from the hug and proudly said, "It's very good to meet you."

I saw Edward stand a little straighter at the words his son had said. It seemed that endless shows of respect he instilled in our children was paying off, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't equally as proud. Ethan's tell tale wiggle came into effect and Charlie placed him on his feet and returned his sentiment. "I am very happy to meet you too, Ethan."

I watched my son run back to Edward with a grin and wrap his arms around his leg to hide his face. Edward just chuckled and leaned down to whisper in his ear, "Good job, buddy. Excellent manners, son."

I turned back to Charlie and saw he was kneeling in front of Emma. I looked down to see her face and saw she was smiling brightly and watching his face carefully. I knelt down with him and spoke gently to Emma. "Sweetie, this is your grandpa, Charlie." She just smiled and nodded her head but didn't say anything. I looked up to see Charlie and he was mirroring her reaction. After a silent moment, Charlie was the first to speak.

"You look just like your momma, Emma." Emma nodded her head and giggled. Charlie held his hand out to her but she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. Charlie's eyes shut tightly and he hugged her to him securely. He took a shaky breath and chuckled before she pulled back. "Your just as strong too... don't ever lose that"

I smiled and stood back up and then Emma came to me once more. We all stood together for a moment but then a throat cleared behind us. It was Carlisle.

Edward took this opportunity to make introductions and soon everyone was gathering around to get a look at the elusive Chief Swan.

"Dad, this is Charlie Swan... Charlie, this is my father, Carlisle Cullen." I watched them both carefully and then relaxed when Carlisle happily extended his hand to Charlie. They shook and gave the traditional greetings and stepped away. Carlisle kept a warm smile on his face during the whole exchange and Charlie looked to be relaxing more. Esme was next, then Jasper and Alice. When everyone had met each other, we made our way into the dining room and took our seats.

**Charlie's POV**

I had never been more happy that I had a healthy heart. Had I come here today in any less health than I had, I would have surely dropped dead from a heart attack.

It was so much to take in, all of it. From the home, to her husband then her children... my grandchildren. Bella literally had everything a person could want, and from the looks of things here, her husband made a good living for them. Even if at the end of this, if Bella decided that she never wanted to see me again, I could die happy.

I would never have to worry if she was safe or loved, it was an obvious thing. Her husband looked at her and treated her as if she were the most precious thing in his world, and she was. I had never seen anyone look at another person with such absolute love and adoration.

When I met my grandchildren, that just sealed the deal. I had often wondered over the years if Bella would have children. Little did I know she had already been married and started a family while I was sitting around and wondering about her life. It was all so overwhelming, but at the same time I couldn't seem to get enough.

Meeting her family was quite possibly one of the hardest things I had ever had to do, even reaching out to Bella and having to walk blindly into this wasn't as hard as that. The reality of it for me, was that they had been there for her when no one else was, and I could only just imagine what they thought about me. I was pleasantly surprised when I was greeted with warm welcomes and easy chatter. Everyone was doing what they could to make sure that I was comfortable and feeling welcome, and soon after we sat down for dinner, all my discomfort had faded away.

Everyone took turns asking me questions about myself, and for the first time ever, I wasn't uncomfortable to be the center of attention. I could see that Bella was happy that I wasn't making a fuss, and it encouraged me further to keep the flow going for all of our sakes.

I learned that Edward was a surgeon, and not only was he a surgeon, but so was his father, Carlisle. I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face as I realized that my daughter was amongst her destiny here. Renee had been so very wrong to ever say that Bella didn't belong at Yale, if anything she didn't belong with the local yokales in Arizona or Seattle. She was special and bright, she had been from the time she could sit up on her own.

I was proud that when anyone next asked about Bella, I could tell them she was happily married and madly in love to her husband, the surgeon. The very idea that this was her reality calmed me and helped me settle into the evening further. My little girl was all grown up now and her life had turned out fantastic. Bella, had everything anyone could ever want and more, but to top it off, she was happy. Most people don't get both, it usually turns into a trade off, but Bella was the exception to that. Actually, looking around the table, they all seemed to be the exception to that.

**BPOV**

When dinner was done, Carlisle suggested the men head out back and have a cigar while the kids enjoyed what was left of the sun and played in the yard. That left Esme, Alice and I free to clean up and get desert ready in peace. I had just grabbed the last few plates from the table and began rinsing them for the dishwasher when I heard Esme speak my name.

"Bella, dear, are you seem to be handling all of this very well. Are you enjoying your fathers visit?" Esme's face always held a smile and her tone was so warm. I smiled and nodded my head yes and looked over to Alice. She was smiling at me as she packed up the leftovers and winked at me.

I turned from the dishes and smiled over to them both. "I'm just happy that after all this time, the truth has made it's way out." It was honestly the way I felt about things, and no matter what had transpired over the last however many years, Charlie was my father, and the truth was that he and I were lied to and robbed of our relationship. It wasn't really something I wanted to focus on, so I concentrated on all the good that had come from it all.

When the last dish was in place, the three of us grabbed plates and coffee and headed out to the patio. When we got outside, I noticed that, Edward, had started up the fire pit and the kids were getting ready to come inside and get ready for bed. Carlisle had apparently let them have a piece of chocolate each, so that covered their deserts. I put the plates down and was preparing to take the kids inside and get them settled for bed, but Esme stopped me and insisted on doing it so I could join my father and Edward.

I went and took my seat next to Edward and slipped off my flats and curled up with my love. We stayed together that way for a long while, just listening to Charlie and Carlisle talk about life in Forks and Carlisle's years on board at the hospital. I could hear the easy going flow of their conversation and I relaxed further into my husband when I realized I didn't need to play conversation police.

After about ten minutes, Esme returned and we cut the cheesecake and passed out plates to everyone. For the next hour, we all sat together and talked about life, and the kids and the way time seems to creep up on you and all that good stuff. Alice and Jasper filled us all in on wedding plans and houses they were looking at.

We all seemed to be doing a very good job about avoiding the big pink elephant in the room, which was the topic of Renee, and how we were going to deal with her. Honestly though, I didn't want to even think about that right now, I was just glad that I had my father here now, and that we were able to get past the first hurdle.

He watched us all talking at one point, and when I gave him a questioning look, he just smiled and leaned over to whisper, "I'm just happy that you have such a great life, kid. That was all I ever wanted for you... just to be happy and loved, and you are."

I let myself enjoy the peace of it all and when the men got into football talk, I really zoned out. I last remembered hearing them chuckle, and before I realized it, I was drifting off to sleep.

When I awoke again, I was in bed and wearing my bra and panties. I instantly rolled over in search of Edward, and was pleased when I felt his arms pulling me on top of him. He was still asleep, so I just rested my head on his chest and let the sound of his heart sooth me. Just as I was about to close my eyes again, I felt his hands rubbing up and down my body and over my butt. I held on to him tighter as his hands glided over me in a more sensuous way.

I lifted my head and saw Edward staring down at me with lust filled eyes. I had no time to react when he flipped us and his lips were suddenly upon me. I didn't remember him bringing me to bed, I didn't really remember falling asleep, but in this moment, I didn't care a thing about any of it.

I kissed him back with as much passion and felt him roll his hips into me. I whimpered at the feel of it and dragged my hands to his hips and clawed his pajama bottoms down as far as I could. I used my legs to take them the rest of the way, and just as I dragged them off completely, I was pulled up and straddling his hips with my panties around my thighs. I didn't get a chance to take them off fully before Edward slid me onto him and began rocking my hips for me.

It was the most beautiful pleasure I could of asked for. I had wanted this since earlier this afternoon, but with the company and the impending dinner, we just couldn't find the time. I looked up from his shoulder while I continued to ride him, and then turned to whisper in his ear. "Is the door locked?"

I saw his head nod yes, and then I pushed him down on the mattress and took over. It had been such an emotional day, and all I wanted was to feel my husband inside of me, and to have him make me feel good. Edward didn't disappoint, and before I could really get into my moves, we were flipped and the love of my life was filling me whole with each rock of his hips. I felt his lips at my ear and then he was whispering his love for me.

All too soon the tightness in my stomach began to overpower me, and with two more thrusts of his hips, I came undone. I turned into the pillow to muffle my cry's and when I couldn't take it anymore, Edward brought my head up and let me bite his shoulder. He didn't necessarily like it, but he knew that I did, and so he always let me.

When I calmed down, I felt his hips going faster, and before I could control my breathing, he was muffling his cries in my neck and hair. We both lay still, each coming down from our high. When a few minutes passed by, we rolled over and continued facing each other.

I would never be able to tell him how much I loved him, or even how much it meant to me for him to make today a reality. Edward was my rock, had I been without him, who knows how long would of gone on without knowing the truth. He looked me over and caressed my cheek before whispering a goodnight to me. I smiled and turned my face to kiss his palm and then closed my eyes and cuddled into his side.

We still had an entire weekend ahead of us, and on top of that, we still needed to discuss Renee with Charlie. But for the time being, I let myself relax and enjoy the peace of being in my husbands arms.

* * *

Authors notes:

Okay... so the next chapter we will deal with Renee. I have decided to take all the reviews into consideration on this one, and I can tell you that she will come nowhere near the Cullen Residence.... Any of them. Charlie will be present, as will Edward and Im thinking Jasper. Seeing as he is a lawyer and all.

Charlie will also get some grandpa time as well. Sorry this one took so long to get out, but it has been a crazy few weeks. I am working on part V as of right now, and as soon as it is done, it will be posted.

Thanks for the great reviews, I love reading all of them, no matter how long or small.


	38. Closure Part 5

**BPOV**

I woke up in the morning to the feel of Edward snuggling closer into my body. I smiled at the perfect feel of it all and snuggled right back. I glanced over to the clock and saw that it was just after six forty five in the morning, and I was searching for the strength to get up, shower and make breakfast.

I let myself wake up fully for another five minutes and then I moved toward the edge of the mattress to get the day started. I heard Edward groan when my body pulled away from his and I smiled at the site of him searching the bed in vain for me. As much as I wanted to get back in, I knew that I couldn't.

After a quick shower and a pep talk in the mirror, I headed down stairs and went straight for the kitchen. It was quiet down stairs, no sounds coming from any of the rooms upstairs or even from Charlies, so I made sure to keep the noise down as I went about making coffee and getting the ingredients for omelette's from the fridge.

Half way through the beating of the eggs, I heard a throat clear behind me. I turned and saw Charlie leaning against the island in a flannel and jeans. From the looks of his appearance, I'd say he had been up a while.

"Hey! Did I wake you?" I knew that I didn't but I honestly didn't know what else to say. He just shook his head and chuckled a little.

"Nah. I've been up for a little while now, it wasn't you." Charlie's face was beaming now so I just dropped it and turned back to the food.

"Coffee is almost done, do you want a cup?" I figured we would _all_ be needing a cup this morning, so before he answered, I went to the cupboard and grabbed one down and placed it next to the pot. Just as I turned back to my dad, I heard the beep on the pot go off.

"Coffee sounds perfect. Thanks, Bells." I heard his shoes shuffling their way across the wood floor as he made his way to the counter and poured himself a cup. I just continued on with breakfast and as I went to grab cheese from the cutting board, it hit me that I hadn't asked Charlie how he wanted his omelet.

"Oh! What would you like in your omlette? I have a ton of vegetables, or avocado..." I took one look at Charlies face and it told me the stuff I just rambled off were not very appealing to him. I didn't have a lot of memories of my father, but from what I remembered, he was a big fan of the bacon and sausage combo. Before he could answer I chuckled and went to the refrigerator to grab the pack of sausage, and turned back to my dad.

"Of course you want bacon and sausage, right?" I could only assume the humor was thick on my face because as soon as Charlie took in my expression he out right laughed.

"That obvious, huh?" he spoke the words through the hearty laughter and just like that, the uncomfortable tension was gone.

**Charlie's ****POV**

I watched quietly for my seat at the breakfast bar in the kitchen as Bella moved around gracefully and prepared breakfast for her family. It pained me when I thought about it, the way I felt like an outsider looking in. As much as I wanted to count myself into her family, I couldn't... it wasn't my place and I hadn't earned the right to such a thing.

I tried to stay out of the way as much as possible, I didn't want to interfere with the way their lives normally took place. I was thrown for a loop though, because neither she or Edward seemed to be okay with just letting me sit quietly. Every couple of minutes either of them would strike up conversation and I would get pulled into it by a simple question or for a side to take. I wont say that I minded it one bit, but I also didn't know how to react to it.

I had lived alone for many years since Bella and her mother left. No one had ever been apart of my life or shared morning stories with me. I was the ultimate bachelor, and not in a good way. In many respects, I was married to my job. I picked up extra shifts for my guys who had families and took any and all holidays so they could be free to share them with their wife and kids. So having this kind of energy in the morning over a simple cup of coffee was beyond new for me.

As new as it was for me, I thanked god silently that it wasn't that way for Bella. She had a family and love from her husband... he looked at her with such love that it actually hurt to watch. She had it all... and I don't mean the money and the nice house, no, that was just a small part of the absolute peace and happiness she seemed to have found. My little girl had made it... she got the hell out of that Podunk town and did real well for herself.

I was still digesting that thought when the stool next to me was being pulled out and then occupied by Emma. She was such a doll, she was Bella all over again. She made her way onto the seat and rested her cheek on her folded hands that rested on the counter. I smiled down to her and she smiled back and then went back to watching her mamma make her food. She never said anything, just a yawn here or there but then Edward came by and picked her up for a big hug.

"Ooooh I love you, sweet pea! How did you sleep?" he asked her. Emma just rested her head on his shoulder and yawned out a response.

"I slept good, daddy. Thanks for asking." I couldn't help but envy him. He loved his daughter and he made sure she knew it. What I wouldn't give to go back in time and do right by Bella. I would of done a thousand things different, but as it were, all I could do now was live with my regrets. I took a long drink of my coffee and then took one more look at Emma and Edward and smiled as best I could when he saw me looking. I knew my face probably looked pained, but I also knew that Edward would understand why.

I got up to get a refill, and just when I stood up, I felt a little body crash into my legs. I was more than taken back when I heard the voice that accompanied said body. "Hey grandpa!"

I turned to meet the face of a smiling Ethan, all thoughts of coffee out the door when I heard him call me that. I quickly discarded the cup the the counter top and picked him up for a hug. I had no idea what to do, but the thought of not acknowledging him with as much enthusiasm he had shown me was simply unacceptable. "Good morning, Ethan!" I gave him a tight hug and he squirmed his legs in signal for release. I complied and when I looked back to the group, everyone was smiling. I would be lying if I said I didn't have the worlds goofiest grin plastered smack dab on my cheeks as well.

I went to grab my cup and saw it was refilled and that there was a plate sitting along side it. I looked up to see Bell's smiling and filling the other plates for the kids and Edward. Just as I was about to sit down, Bella spoke up.

"Actually, Dad, I was thinking we could go sit out on the deck for breakfast. It's so nice out today, and I think you might like the view." I just smiled and grabbed my plate and followed Edward out the set of french doors.

When I stepped outside, I almost dropped my plate. The view was beyond breathtaking, it was glorious. Acre upon acre was set out before me, and from the elevated deck, I got more than just the average view. They had done a great deal of landscaping and beyond the magnolia trees was a small cottage off the the back of the property. The weather was perfect and the grass was greener than I had ever seen out side of a golf course.

I heard the kids come out and their voices pulled me from my daze. I went and took a seat at the dark cherry table off to the right. The center decorated with a small bouquet of white daisies in a yellow vase. I smiled at the sight, remembering how Bella used to adore picking a daisy from any garden she passed that had them.

When we were all seated, we dug in. Well, I dug in, Edward and Bella were busy cutting up french toast and pancakes for the kids, but after they were all situated, they were right along with me. This breakfast was one for the books and I didn't waste time talking. Instead, I made sure to finish every last drop and when Bella asked if I wanted seconds, I smiled heartily and nodded with a firm yes.

When Bella emerged from the kitchen, she wasn't alone. Along side her stood her father in law Carlisle, and the look on his face told me that he was here to deliver anything but good news.

~**************~

_EPOV_

I watched Charlie's face go from a smile to a frown in seconds. I turned to see what had given him that reaction, and when I turned, my father stood along side a worried Bella and I knew that something terrible was wrong.

"Dad? What's going on?" My tone was weary, I stood before he answered and went to stand between the kids. I waited, but he didn't speak, instead, he turned and nodded for someone to follow him out. It was my mother and although she held a warm smile in place, it never met her eyes. She looked to us all and said hello to Charlie then turned back to me.

"Edward, I'm going to take the kids to our house for a while, were going to have a nice lunch and then head out to see a movie, and maybe get a toy." her tone was soft and she smiled to Ethan and Emma when she said it, but beyond the words, there was nerves.

The kids hadn't noticed, they had already fled the table to go get dressed and set to go. When it was only the adults outside, my father spoke.

"Renee Dwyer is due to land at Midway airport in a half hour. After that, I have been told that she has a rental car and is planning on coming to your home... this home. I do not know how she got the address or even how in the world she found you, Bella... but she has."

I watched my father turn to Charlie as if in accusation, but when he saw the expression on Charlies face that I had been looking at, his tone changed.

"Charlie, I'm sorry... but you need to understand that Bella is our family. We have seen her go through many emotions and the thought of _anyone_ coming to make waves with her is one thing I will not stand for..." he looked around and corrected himself, "_We_ will not stand for."

Charlie stood then and his face held a look of pain and confusion. "I can appreciate that, Carlisle. Can't say I blame you after all you have heard... all the same though, I don't want any of that for her either. What can I do to help?" and just like that, the easy going mood of my father was back and we began to plot.

In the middle of all the talking and strategy, I felt a stare on me. I looked up to see Bella standing in the doorway just watching me with a blank expression. I went to her immediately and began apologizing. I apologized for having not done it sooner and for not having asked how she was feeling. She didn't say anything, and after I was done rambling words off, she kissed my cheek and went inside.

I looked back to the table and saw that both Carlisle and Charlie were sitting together and discussing the conversation that Charlie had with Renee before arriving here. I excused myself and went to see the kids off with Bella and as we watched my mother drive down the property and over the small hill that adorned our gates, I turned to her.

"Tell me what you are feeling love? What can I do?" I was desperate. I didn't care what she asked of me, I would do it. I held her face for a long moment and when I thought she was going to answer me, she kissed me instead. It wasn't frenzied or drawn out, but there was an edge of desperation to the way she clung to me. I did my best to hold her an reassure her, but of what I had no idea.

We walked back in and she headed up stairs to shower while I went out back to talk to the guys. I had just stepped through the threshold when my dad called out to me.

"What is it, dad?" he looked at me severely and answered.

"She's landed."

~************~

**BPOV**

Okay... I could handle this. Actually I _wanted_ this, I wanted to have closure on Renee, she had been a sore subject for far too long and I for one was ready to close that book.

I showered and changed into one of my casual outfits. One could never go wrong in Banana Republic, so I slid on my light gray scowl neck top and a pair of dark denim skinny jeans. When my face was ready and my hair was in place in a casual bun atop my head, I slid on my flats and headed down stairs to find Edward.

What I found was a living room full of men and they were all dressed and ready for whatever came next. I made my way down the stairs and when Edward saw me, I was in his arms in an instant. "Are you okay, baby?" I just smiled confidently and nodded then turned to the rest of them.

"I want to see her." My tone was calm, I felt as if I were the picture of complete ease. I hadn't noticed Jasper sitting in the room, until he spoke up and asked me once more.

"Are you sure, Bella? From what, Charlie tells us, she seems to have a real vendetta against you. I would hate to see you get hurt, especially if we can avoid her seeing you." I just smiled and nodded. I met all their eyes and did the same, I needed this. We all did.

Charlie stood up then, his eyes tight with emotion for me. He didn't say anything, instead he made his way to me and grabbed me from Edwards embrace and hugged me tightly. "I'm so sorry that this got so far out of hand Bell's! I swear to you I had no idea of what had happened... you two were always so close... I-I never thought she would... that she could..."

"I know, Dad. Trust me, I know." Just as I said those words, our house phone rang. Edward already had the cordless in his hands and when he looked down at the number, he froze.

"It's the gate" he whispered. I expected the nerves to come, but they never did. Instead I grabbed the phone and answered.

"Cullen residence." There was silence on the other end of the line, I knew it caught her off guard, so I repeated myself. This time however, she built up the courage to speak.

"Uh yes... uh... Isabella Swan? I mean Cullen?" the question in her tone was almost laughable... that is until I heard her whisper to someone else, "She is Cullen now right?" the words weren't meant for me, but I answered her anyway.

"Yes... I am now Isabella Cullen, how may I help you?" again I was met with silence, but after a moment Renee spoke up clearly.

"Bella? Honey? Is that you? It's your mom!" I rolled my eyes and looked around the room to see everyone with an anxious expressions. I was amazingly not as surprised as I should have been, instead I acknowledged her and then questioned her.

"I know, Renee. We've been expecting you... what do you want?" My tone was probably a lot less nicer than I had intended it to be, but I couldn't worry about that now.

"I-I was hoping I could see you... I wanted to see how you are doing." I don't know what happened inside of me, but when she said those words I nearly snapped. I handed Edward the phone and grabbed my keys from the counter.

"Do _not_ let her in those gates! Tell her I will meet her at Starbucks down the street..." Edward nodded and pulled the phone up to speak.

"Renee, this Edward Cullen, Bella's husband. You are not welcome in our home now, nor in the future. As for speaking to Bella, we will meet you at Starbucks. Just turn around the way you came and it will be on your right hand side."

He didn't say anything else to her, and if she tried talking to him, she didn't get the chance. He hung up, grabbed my hand and pulled me into a fierce hug. "I'm coming with you, love... please?" He was worried about me, and to be honest I had no idea what awaited me there. I squeezed his hand and we made our way toward the door. Just before we walked out, Carlisle called out to me.

"Bella..." I stopped and turned to meet his eyes. "You are an amazing woman, an even better mother and above all one of the reasons people admire our family. Thank you for being all those things and more." His words went to a place that I didn't know existed, I went to him and hugged him tightly and whispered a thank you. I turned to Charlie next and hugged him silently. I could see that he was hurting and felt guilty, but I didn't want him to, this wasn't his burden to bare anymore... he was free.

Before I could let my emotions take over me, I pulled away and went back to Edward. Carlisle called out to us as we were leaving again and reminded us that he would be here waiting with Charlie and Jasper. With that being said, Edward and I made our way to the garage and into the BMW-X5 he had bought me for mothers day.

I sat in my seat silently as he turned the ignition and the engine purred to life. As we made our way out of the gates and, Edward took a moment to call the house from the gate remote and remind Carlisle to lock them until we came back.

After that we were on our way just a brief mile and a half down the road to the ever famous Starbucks. We pulled into the lot and parked and I started laughing. I looked over to Edward and his face held a look of concern and amusement. "Love, are you okay?" he asked. I just nodded and grabbed his hand.

"I just think this is all very ridiculous is all. All of it! Renee... her husband... pretending to care... just ridiculous." I finished the last part with a shake to my head and then I opened my door. Before I was all the way out, Edward was in front of me and helping me step out. I smiled and kissed him chastely on the lips and then together we walked in hand in hand.

As we stepped into the over crowded coffee house, a woman with an orange shirt and jeans caught my attention. I raised my eyebrows and saw Renee attached to the arm of a man that looked half her age. I stifled a laugh and tugged on Edwards arm to get his attention. He met my gaze and then followed it to the table in the far corner and in that instant, he tensed and pulled me closer.

"Baby, whenever your ready to go, you just say the word and were gone... no questions asked okay?" I nodded and kept my gaze locked firmly on Renee. She didn't have a smile on her face, instead she looked as if she were trying to place me. I decided then that this was on _my_ terms and she could wait another ten minutes while we ordered a coffee. I mean whats the difference, I hadn't seen her in years anyway.

I turned to Edward and pulled him along with me to stand in line. He leaned down and kissed my temple then whispered into my ear, " You are so much better than anything she will ever be love... I promise that she will not hurt you, I will not allow it." The tone in his voice was fierce and loving, only Edward could say something like that and make it sound so good.

When we ordered our drinks, we stood off to the side and waited for our coffees. When the Barista called out our lattes for Edward and Bella Cullen, Renee pounced. Edward reached for our drinks and as soon as it was in my hand and we turned, there she was.

"I knew that was you! Why are you being so rude, Bella?! And why would you let your _husband_ talk to me in such a way?!" she sounded absolutely lost, like she really had no idea why, Edward would have an issue with her being in or around our home. I looked at Renee and raised and eyebrow as if in question. She still held the same stupid expression as when she first began, so I moved past her without answering and went to sit at the table. Edward held my hand the entire time. When we sat, Renee followed suit, but she was still waiting for a response.

"Well? What do you have to say for yourself?" she spat at me. I felt Edward's body stiffen and I chanced a look at his face while I sipped my coffee. His jaw was tensed and it matched his body. I squeezed his hand and he squeezed back. I placed my coffee down gently as if uninterested in her question and met her gaze.

"_I_ don't owe _you_ anything, Renee. Not an explanation, not an apology and I sure as hell don't owe you my attention." there, that felt good. I felt Edwards body loosen at my words, and he sipped at his coffee as well.

Renee, seemed taken aback by the response, she opened and closed her mouth a few times before deciding on shutting up and then calmed her attitude.

"Well aren't you going to at least introduce me to your husband? Edward is it?" I didn't bother looking at Renee anymore, instead I did a once over on her husband and then gave her my response.

"Last I remembered, you didn't want anything to do with me, so... let's start with your stepson." One point Bella, Renee zero. I heard Edward chuckle into his drink and when I looked at him, we shared a devious grin and then turned back to them.

Renee was shooting daggers with her eyes at me, but I paid no attention. I simply raised my eyebrows in question as if signaling her to continue. "He's _not_ my son, Phil is my husband." she said proudly while gripping his arm.

I smiled and took another sip of my latte. It was quite good... a Carmel Brulée latte. I took that moment to share that exact thought with _my_ husband. "Isn't this delicious? We really need to stop here more..."

Edward looked at me with the most amused expression and the best smile I had ever seen him wear. He chuckled a little and picked up where I left off. "You know, they do make an exceptional latte. We never get here as often as we could, your always saying we should stop here more... I'll make sure to do that from now on, love." He kissed my cheek and threw an arm over my shoulder and snuggled me to his side.

This was as close to my happy place as I could get right here in the public eye and for the first time in a long time, I didn't worry about offending anyone. Because in all honesty, I just didn't care.

Renee scoffed at our dialogue and then her voice got tighter. "Isabella Marie Swan, I did not raise you to treat me like this." she spat. I laughed. I actually fucking laughed at her.

"Cullen. My last name is, Cullen. And you're right, you didn't raise me, I raised myself. So don't get all bent out of shape and motherly on me now that you decide you want to waltz in my life after ten years of being absent. I mean, what exactly did you expect? Really, I want to know what you want from me exactly..." I said it all in the wake of my laughter. It was the only emotion I could find in me right now, I actually found this funny.

Phil tried to speak, but Edward shut him down real quick. "Phil is it?" the boy toy nodded and Edward continued. "No offense, but you really have no right to make a comment on any of this... its not your business. I mean, did you even know Renee had a daughter when you married her?" Edward was serious when he asked that question, and it didn't surprise me when I saw Phil shake his head no and then go back to quietly staring out a window.

Renee didn't seem to like that one bit, but before I could warn her, she went ahead and spoke. "And what gives you the right to talk to _my husband_ in that manner!? Who do you think you are!?"

I sighed humorously and took another sip of my latte. It _really_ was quite good. I knew that Edward was getting ready to blast her, but if anyone was going to say there peace, it was going to be me. I reached out and grabbed Edwards free hand to get his attention. I did it just before he opened his mouth and when he looked at me, I smiled gently and mouth _I love you_ and then turned back to Renee.

"Why don't you just say what it is that you're here for." My words were relaxed and instead of taking a sip of my drink, I sat forward and met her eyes. Renee was once again taken back by my question and it was just beginning.

"Why did you seek me out? Oh wait, I know why, because my dad demanded to know where I was and you didn't have an answer. You lied to him for the last ten years... hell you lied to the both of us since I was around five." She looked as if she had been slapped, but that still didn't stop me.

"So you dug around, hired a few private investigators and found out that I had a good life, some money and you thought, 'What the hell, Renee. Let's see what you can get out of the ol' gal" right?" Edwards arm brought me closer to his side and he dropped kisses to my hair. I relaxed into his body and it calmed me further. Just saying the words was therapeutic, but having my love beside me and giving me strength was even better. I wasn't alone in this world anymore, Edward, was my other half and as long as he was by my side, there wasn't anything I couldn't do.

I continued on so that Renee couldn't speak. "You don't deserve to know a thing about my life. You have no entitlements to any of my accomplishments... you don't deserve it, but I'm going to tell you anyway and then maybe I can have some peace and you will too."

For the first time since I was fourteen I saw Renee cry. When I was fourteen, it was because she didn't have the money to pay the electric and they disconnected us. She had spent the bill money on a girls weekend with some of her friends, but now, she was crying because everything I was saying was spot on. I continued.

"I graduated summa cum laude from Yale, moved to Chicago and was a staff writer for the tribune here. Edward and I had our first child six years ago and I worked from home as a writer for a while, but I decided to devote my full attention to my family, so I only write on my spare time." Renee snorted at that and it took me back a little. To be honest it pissed me off and my easy going attitude was no longer around.

"Is there something wrong with what I have said so far?" my tone was questioning and angry. I saw Phil reach over to take my moms hand and tell her to relax, but she pulled away and looked at me as if I were a clown.

"I just think its hilarious that you sit here all high and mighty, talking about summa cum what ever's and Yale, then you go and say something like your a stay at home mom! That is just classic! I knew you would end up like that." I thought I was angry before, but now I was seeing red. I was just about to tell Renee where to go and how to get there, but Edward chimed in.

"Excuse me?" he said. Renee just raised an eyebrow in challenge to him and her face held a smirk. "I will have you know that Bella _chose_ to be with our family full time, she didn't simply _have_ to do it. She's not some washed up piece of uneducated trash that got knocked up and didn't have an education. Bella holds a _Degree_ from Yale and she doesn't have to justify her choices to the likes of you!" he spat at her. I felt his hand was formed into a fist as he said the words to her.

Renee's smug look was gone now, but she wasn't done yet. "Is that what you think I am? A piece of washed out trash that has no other options?" Her tone was full of venom and her eyes were tight. I looked to Edward and saw his eyes were staring daggers at her. He sat back and smirked at her and continued.

"I simply drew a picture, _your_ the one that made the connection." and with that he grabbed his drink and took a long swig and then turned to me. "This _really is_ a fantastic latte!" It caught me so off guard, that all I could do was laugh and close my eyes.

I turned back to Renee and saw her breathing deep as she prepared for her next attack. This had gone on long enough though, and I just wanted this to be done with. " We've been married for six years now, we have two children and we live in peace. I have nothing to offer you, no money or land. No cars or jewelry of any kind." I took a deep breath and then asked her, "Are you dieing?"

Renee gasped and Phil looked at me like I had two heads. I waited patiently for her to answer. "Why would you ask such a question?" she spat out. I curled my shoulders as if in question and continued.

"Because if you need some vital organ and I have it, I'll give it to you... but that's where the charity ends." her brow was furrowed as she took my words in. But what she said next surprised me more than it should have.

"But I thought you two were rich... like filthy rich. What do you mean you have nothing?" I knew it, it was the one thing I was hoping she wouldn't want, but of course it was the main reason. I squeezed Edwards hand and he began stroking my palm with his thumb. I was about to tell her off, but Edward spoke up.

"What Bella means is that we wont be giving you anything like that. Yes, we are wealthy, both Bella and I are, but you have no entitlements to that money, and I assure you that it is all ironclad sealed. So if that is what you sought her out for, then you are wasting your time. We will not be giving you a dime."

His words were said as a reaffirmation of what we had argued about a few nights ago. I always felt as if our money was not mine to give, well, when it came to situations like this. Before this topic though, I never thought twice about making a large purchase or swiping our credit card. I knew it was my money too, but in this situation, it was all about self preservation. I didn't want Edward or his money to become a bargaining chip.

Hearing him now though, I could see why he got upset. To him my saying I had nothing, made it look like he held a thumb over me. That was definitely not the case, nor had it ever been. Edward would of gladly signed over everything we had to me if he thought that was what I wanted, he was always trying to get me to use his account even when we were just dating. And when I was pregnant with Emma, well... forget it. I don't think I spent more than forty dollars of my own money every month, he was always setting up charge accounts and paying bills before I could.

He truly was an amazing man and though we had struggled in the beginning, he was still the only man I could ever, or would ever love. I thought over all of those things as we sat silently and waited for Renee to say something. She didn't though.

Instead she dropped her head into her hands and tried to collect herself. Edward and I watched Phil comfort her and whisper things to her. After a long moment, she looked up and the smugness was gone, all that was left was frustration and she began again.

"You have the wrong idea about my being here, Bella. I can see why you would think I want something from you... but I don't... believe it or not, I really did want to see how your life turned out. My question about you having nothing was just me checking to see if _you_ needed anything."

Okay, there were a hundred different thoughts going through my head right now. First things first though, was that she sounded sincere. I had no idea how to deal with sincere... it was a foreign thing coming from, Renee. I opened my mouth to say something, but I had no words. Instead I looked over to Edward and I saw he was appraising Renee as well and he began.

"I provide a more than comfortable life for my family, Renee." His words were guarded and careful. He never relaxed his body as he said it, and when she looked over to him she nodded but then turned back to me.

"And if he chose to leave you someday? Would you still have a comfortable life? Could you do what I did for you, Bella?" her words were almost a whisper and her eyes were intense. I actually gasped at her words though. It hurt to even think of Edward leaving me, and with that, she planted her seed and began to water it.

Suddenly the only things going through my head were visions of Edward telling me he didn't want me anymore. I felt the tears begin to prick my eyes and my breath was coming in shallow. I felt Edward pull me into his arms and he peppered my face with kisses and was stroking my hair. I couldn't shake the picture she painted though.

Realistically I knew I would be okay, I had a degree from Yale and could work anywhere in the country, but the idea of raising Emma and Ethan without Edward beside me seemed almost impossible. I was still trying to collect myself when Edwards angry voice filled the air.

"How dare you! You have no right to come here and say things like that to her..." he was about to continue, but she cut him off.

"It's a good question! Don't act so surprised, Edward... men like you cheat on women all the time... hell you probably have two girls on the side right now. I'm just trying to make sure Bella has a plan for when her perfect little world comes tumbling down."

It was in those words that thoughts of Tanya hit me. I didn't want to think of them, but I couldn't stop myself. It had hurt so badly and the memory alone made me feel it all over again. My stomach began to turn and my head was hurting, but Edwards acidic tone pulled me from the darkness.

"You listen to me, Renee. Bella is my life... my one and only. Were not you and Charlie, not by a long shot. I would _never_ betray Bella like that, she is the mother of my children and the only thing I want to wake up to and sleep with at night. As for her having a plan, she doesn't need one, but if a day ever came that she didn't want to be with me anymore, she would be taken care of. I would _never_ leave her with a life any less than she has become accustomed to. So don't lose any sleep at night over our lives or better yet, Bella's."

Edward rubbed the length of my arm the entire time he had spoke, and when he was done, he placed a kiss to my head and pulled my chin up to see his eyes. "I love you so much, baby... more than my own life."

I felt the hole in my heart fill with his love and just like that, her words meant nothing anymore. On the other hand they pissed me off more and the pain I had felt was replaced with anger and frustration. I sat up and squared my shoulders to face her.

"I could never do to my kids what you did to me... never. I love them far too much to ever inflict pain on them or make them feel bad for being successful and smart." I took a deep breath and continued, "I owe you nothing, not a kind word or my time, but all the same, I'm sitting here right now and talking to you... why? I don't have that answer, but I know now that you are exactly as I remembered. Your vindictive and petty, I don't like you, Renee. I don't want to know you. Please don't contact me again."

With that I stood and gathered my things to leave. Edward was already pulling my chair out and helping me with my sweater. When we had all of our things and turned to leave, Renee called out to us.

"So that's it then? Your going to pretend you don't have a mother?" she sounded surprised. I turned and looked at her, all emotion gone from my body. It needed to be that way, I couldn't afford to invest anymore of it in her.

"I have a mother... her name is Esme Cullen..." and with that, I turned with Edward and we made our way out of the coffee house. When we finally made it outside, Edward pulled me into his arms and I exhaled deeply into his chest. We were just about to kiss, but our names being called out caught our attention.

We turned toward the sound and were greeted with Jasper, Charlie and Carlisle. I had never been more relieved to see my family more than I was in this moment. I shuddered a breath and in the time it took me to inhale, I was in the arms of my father.

"Are you okay, Bell's?" I just nodded and took another deep breath. Charlie released me and I went to, Carlisle next.

"Were here for you, Bella. Whatever you need." He whispered to me. As much as I loved Charlie, it was incomparable to the way I loved, Carlisle. It probably sounds horrible, seeing as Charlie is my real father, but, Carlisle had been everything in a father I needed for the last seven years or so. He was next in line to set anyone straight beside Edward. On top of that, he truly saw me as a daughter and I was always welcome into the Cullen family. I never had to work for it, they simply accepted me.

He released me and I turned back to Edward to see he and Jasper talking quietly amongst themselves. I walked back to them and just as I wrapped my arms around my husband, I heard Renee approaching us.

"Charlie? What the hell are you doing here!? How did you know where she was?" I turned to see Charlie take a step toward Edward and I, when he was beside me, he responded.

"I'm visiting my daughter... Edward and Bella invited me. Now may I ask what _you_ are doing here?" Renee had no words, instead she stared at us all dumbfounded and her eyes were as wide as saucers. It was in that moment that she knew she had been caught. All her lies were out and she had no way of hiding what she had done. I decided there was no better moment to set the record straight.

"I asked him to come because we had missed more than enough time together because of the lies you told us... You took me... you took me and you lied to Charlie. He never had the chance to be a father to me, and now even though it's too late for him to try, were trying to salvage what is left of our relationship. Please just leave us all alone, you have done enough."

Edward was beside me and holding my hand. I knew he was trying to give me strength, but I honestly didn't need it anymore. I was surprisingly over the emotions and all that was left, was an empty barrel of feelings. I didn't care anymore, and as I stood there looking at her face, I didn't care about the lies or the way she treated me when I left to Yale. I just wanted her gone and for my lift to go on the way it had.

With that, I turned back to the X-5 and walked to my door. Edward was there in an instant and as soon as I was in, I let myself relax. There simply wasn't anything left to say about the matter, and as far as I was concerned, Renee was no longer a problem, she was simply a distant thought.

We pulled away from Starbucks and headed the mile and a half up the road to our home, all the while in silence. Edward just held my hand and drove, I could only guess he understood I didn't want to talk about it. The second we approached our gates, I let it all go. Renee would no longer taint our home or be a source of discomfort, she was gone and I was done.

~***********~

**Carlisle's****POV**

As soon as Bella and Edward were gone, I went into protective mode. Jasper flanked my side along with Charlie, and together we stood looking at Renee and her husband. I wasn't the biggest man, but from the looks of Phil, I knew we were doing a good job being intimidating.

"Renee,... I am, Carlisle Cullen, Edward's father... Bella's as well. This is my future son in-law Jasper, and of course you know Charlie."

I waited for acknowledgment, and when she nodded her head yes I continued. "I just want you to know that we will be filing a restraining order on you both... Jasper here is an attorney and is having it expedited as we speak. If you break that order, we will prosecute you to the fullest extent of the law. Do you understand?"

She looked at me with anger and hate, but I didn't care. I had seen that look on others faces before, and the most recent was with Tanya. I knew that look meant I was doing my job well, and the idea of her staying away from the kids and Bella were enough to calm my nerves.

Renee didn't say a word, instead she grabbed Phil's hand and together they walked toward a small compact rental and got in without another word being said. They drove away. It all seemed to easy and I wasn't ready to let my guard down.

I turned to Jasper and without having to ask, he grabbed his phone and called to set the order up and make notes on Renee's whereabouts. I in turn called Amy, the P.I and added Renee and Phil to the list with Tanya to make sure we had tabs at all times. There wasn't any price I wouldn't pay to protect my family.

As I hung up, I looked over to Charlie and saw him watching Jasper and I with an amused expression. I smiled in question, and he replied with, "I'm just glad you all are so welcoming to me... I would hate to be on your bad side."

I laughed and so did Jasper. I couldn't blame him for that comment, to anyone else it would seem a bit extreme, but to me it was just insurance. I liked being ahead of the game and more importantly I hated surprises. I didn't take threats to my family lightly and I was at least glad that Charlie saw that.

We all went in grabbed a coffee so that Bella and Edward could have some time alone, and when enough time had passed, we started off towards their house once more so that we could get back to Charlie and Bella's reunion.

* * *

A/N: So that is Renee. She's not gone... this isn't the final confrontation. Just a look into her twisted ways. SO... hope that was good, let me know what you would like to see better said, done etc...

I thank you so much for the great reviews guys... I love reading them and I try to incorporate all the ideas you give me. Thanks so much for reading!


	39. Closure Part VI

A/N This is a short chapter in comparison to the ones I have written before, but I need to get this one out before I can build on the next one, it just won't flow put together. Please enjoy!

* * *

**EPOV**

I wanted so badly to take back the decision that led us to that damn coffee shop. I had never felt absolute disdain for a person as I was feeling for Renee. I hated her, more than hated her I despised everything she was and stood for.

The way she ridiculed Bella for being a mother instead of a full time writer nearly sent me launching over the table at her. I could not get past the fact that she was Bella's _mother_. The idea seemed preposterous to me. That was her_ mother? _For Gods sake, with a mother like that, who needs enemies?

We drove home in silence, I had no idea of what would be appropriate to say after such an encounter. So instead of talking, I just held her hand. It was the only thing I could do for her and I wished with everything that I was, that I could do more.

When we approached the gates, I punched in the code to unlock them and we made our way through. As soon as we were parked in the garage and back in the comfort of our home, I pulled Bella into my arms and just held her. She didn't cry or even say a word, instead she rested her head against my chest and held me back.

It hurt more knowing her past now, it hurt more now than when I hadn't met Renee or Charlie. Now I had faces... I had names and faces and personalities. I thought back to the few stories Bella had shared with me over the years and the ones she had just shared with Charlie too. They were all much more painful to endure now that I had someone to direct the rage at.

I was still thinking of ways to give my love some peace, but sooner than I would of liked, she pulled away and made her way toward the kitchen. I followed after her, just like I always do and sat silently on the bar stool as she cleared up odds and ends in the kitchen. She seemed so calm and collected, the opposite of what I was feeling. I admired her strength but then I thought back to the night she found out I had betrayed her and it blew up in my face.

She had seemed so collected that night as well. Never once in that dinner did she let on that it was killing her to sit there, but later when I had built up the courage to beg her for forgiveness and we lay in bed confessing our feelings, she told me how much it had actually hurt her... how painful it was to not feel as if I loved her.

I swallowed back the emotions that were getting ready to drown me. I was by no means an expert about emotions, but when it came to Bella, I knew her completely... heart, body and soul. I got up from my chair and went to stand behind her and pulled her gently to my body. When I felt her back pressed tight against my chest, I rested my head on her own and began at the beginning.

"Isabella..." I spoke softly to her. She didn't say anything to me, instead she seemed to melt into my embrace and the tension in her body relaxed a bit.

"I don't know what you are feeling... I can only imagine. I hate that you had to sit there and listen to her... I hate that all I could do was throw ridiculous insults her way... but most of all, I hate that it hurt you... I sat beside you and held your hand while somebody hurt you. I'm _so_ sorry, love."

It was in those words that both of our defenses came down. Bella cried for the first time in my arms the way she had when I had hurt her. It was the kind of cry you have when your soul hurts, not your heart. And it killed a part of my soul to know that I could do nothing to make it right again. For the first time in our marriage, we both fell apart because we hurt so deeply for the other. That was just how we worked, you couldn't hurt one without crushing the other... _we were the same person._

~*********~

We had at some point sat on the kitchen floor curled up in each others arms. I had no idea how much time passed us by nor did I care, but after some time had passed us by, I stood up and carried Bella upstairs in my arms. I had half expected her to argue with me, but she didn't. Instead she held me tighter and let me do what I could to take care of her.

When I reached our bedroom, I pulled back to covers and placed her in the center. I sat beside her and began peeling off her shoes and clothes. She seemed content to let me do it, and I was thankful... she was letting me love her... letting me absolutely care for her.

When she was in her bra and panties, I got up from the bed and pulled off my shirt. I didn't think, I just acted. Instead of giving her the shirt she used to sleep in last night, I replaced it with the one I had been wearing. She smiled as I helped her into it and when she was all buttoned up and ready to rest, I laid down beside her stroked her hair in silence.

Not long after I had joined her, she was asleep. I kissed her face and got up slowly so not to wake her. I grabbed a t shirt and headed down stairs and was met with my dad, Jas and Charlie waiting around the kitchen and talking amongst themselves quietly. When Jasper noticed me, his hand reached out and slapped my back a few times.

I had no idea where to begin, but my dad sure did. "Edward, how is Bella doing?" I could hear the worry thick in his voice and when I met up, his eyes reflected the same.

I took a deep breath, shook my head and stared down at my hands as I answered. "She's asleep" He didn't ask anything else, but Charlie did.

"Is she... I mean, is she okay?" When I brought my gaze to Charlie, I felt a plethora of different emotions. Among the many were, pity, anger and frustration. I couldn't even tell you how I had come to feel the things I was feeling, I didn't even really understand where my anger for him was coming from right now, its not as if he had been there with us. I only knew that Bella was hurting and beyond the things Renee had said to her, Charlie was a part of that pain as well.

"She just had a conversation with the woman who discarded her like a piece of trash over ten years ago. We sat there and listened to that same woman ridicule her schooling, her writing and then her choice to be a full time mother. To add insult to injury, she told Bella that I would leave her someday and that she would have nothing because I wouldn't provide her any part of the financial stability we have... she even went as far as accusing me of currently having multiple affairs going on right now. So no, Charlie. She's not okay."

I pushed off of the counter and started striding away from the three silent men that were among me. When I passed my father, we made eye contact and he looked at me with a torn expression. No doubt the emotion he was feeling was because half of him agreed with my anger. He knew how hurt Bella was that no one had gone to her graduation, and even though Charlie wasn't responsible for Bella being out of his life, he never took the opportunity she had given him when she asked him to come.

I didn't linger a second more, and instead hurried out of the room and up the stairs to get back to my wife. When I walked back in our bedroom, I went straight to the bed and saw Bella sleeping peacefully with a small smile on her face. All the anger I had been feeling melted when I let my eyes drink her in. She was beautiful... she was _mine._

I crawled in the bed along side her and for the longest moment, I just watched her. Even though I saw her smiling in her sleep, I couldn't shake the pain I remembered crossing her face as Renee fed her lie after lie. She had the same horrified expression she wore outside of Petterino's almost seven years ago. That same broken look she gave me as she told me that she couldn't be with a man who was with another woman.

The reality of what Renee had planted in her head hit me like a brick wall. I didn't think about why she had reacted so horribly at the coffee shop, but now, with the memories of that horrible night fresh in my head, I knew.

There was no way I could tell Bella that I would _never_ do that to her... because I already had. She had forgiven me and loved me unconditionally, but now that the words were thrown in her face, she couldn't believe that I would not do it again. Granted _I_ _knew_ that I would never... _could never_ do that to her again. The idea of anyone else made me sick and it was never even a thought.

The second part of Renee's words were just as bad. The very idea that I would ever leave Bella with nothing, well that... that was preposterous! She is the mother of my children and the love of my life. For god sakes, we didn't even have a prenuptial agreement! God forbid the day ever came, Bella would have rights to half of everything, hell I would let her have anything she wanted... it wouldn't mean a thing without her or the kids anyway.

It was then that I knew what I had to do. I got out of bed again and bolted down the stairs to find Jasper.

As soon as I heard their voices, I began calling out to him. "Jas! Jasper!" as soon as I was down the stairs and around the second living room, I saw Jasper standing in the doorway to the kitchen. He looked alarmed and was ready to pounce.

I was still so frantic about what I knew I needed to do, that I had no words for him yet. He met my anxious eyes and came to my side instantly. "What is it, Edward? What the hell happened?" I looked up to answer and saw Charlie and my father standing there now with alarmed expressions as well. I nodded my head to my office and Jasper started walking with me. When we were behind closed doors I explained to him that I wanted a contract drawn up entitling Bella to half of everything if we were ever to separate or divorce.

I knew she would fight me on needing it, but I would fight her just as hard. I would not allow Renee to poison our marriage with doubt or fear... we had plenty of that in the beginning of our relationship, it had no room here in our marriage.

* * *

**Charlie's POV**

That's it! Renee was on my shit list. I couldn't believe the things she had said to Bella, what kind of person says such horrible things? And to their daughter none the less! I could see the anger seeping out of Edward as he went on about what she had said and the way she degraded Bella. I can't say I blame the kid for being pissed at me, he loved my little girl and right now she was hurt... which in turn hurt him.

As horrible as I felt for my part in all this, I couldn't let myself get caught up in that. Right now I had my eyes on the prize or wringing Renee's throat and disposing of the body. Carlisle and I had already began talking and trying to figure out what it was she wanted exactly. Beyond that, we were trying to figure out who the hell had told Renee where Bella was, and more over, where she lived. Renee had it all, right down to the street she lived on. That was more than unsettling and it made me start second guessing even myself. The only thing that kept me from feeling like the bad guy, was that I hadn't told anyone of where I was going... nobody!

It was in that mind frame that it hit me. I looked up to see Carlisle in deep concentration and a furrowed brow. "Carlisle... I think we need to start looking at the people closest to you." I didn't want to say it, but I knew I had to. When I looked up to see his face, the expression he wore was shocked. I knew I had about two seconds to rectify the poorly stated words that had just fallen from my lips, so I started, and I started fast.

"Not your family, Carlisle! That's not who I mean." he looked at me wide eyed still, but at least now he was breathing, so I carried on. "I'm suggesting the people you have watching the information for you... the woman, that P.I you have on your payroll." It was then that realization flickered in his eyes and he gasped. I didn't get to say any other words, because Carlisle was on the move and clutching his keys.

I was on my feet now as well and ready to follow him and help in any way I could. He was mumbling inaudibly as I followed him around the room without any clue as to what to say. Outside of the angry words he was spewing, I caught the occasional curse here and there. I was just about to ask if I had been right, but before I could, he was calling out for Jasper and Edward.

When we made our way into the hallway toward Edwards office, he and Jasper both emerged and looked ready for a fight. They didn't get a chance to ask what the problem was, because as soon as Carlisle saw them, he was ranting like a mad man.

"We need to go! Now!" Both Jasper and Edward looked confused, but that didn't stop Carlisle from his tirade. "I think Charlie figured out who is telling Renee things about our family... and if it's who he thinks it is, then we have more than Renee to worry about... there's also Tanya."

I had no clue who the hell Tanya was, but from the look on Edwards face, she was someone or better yet, something that was a sore point in his life. It wasn't difficult to come to that conclusion, because his fists were clenched and his jaw looked as if it were trying to make his teeth into powder. Seconds ticked by but to me it felt like minutes. I stood there absolutely lost with what they were talking about. Finally, Carlisle broke the silence once more. "I hate to think this way, but when Charlie mentioned it, it all made sense... it was Amy."

Edward was about to yell it looked like, but all of a sudden Jasper stepped forward and he looked pissed off as well. "Well then let's go confront her. Right now, I say we go right now." and with Jaspers words, Carlise, and I followed him out toward the front door. Before we made it outside though, Edward called out to us.

"I need to stay with, Bella... she needs me. I-I can't leave her." It wasn't the words he said, it was the way he said it. It was as if he truly couldn't leave her. He didn't wait for us to acknowledge him, instead he turned around and took the stairs two at a time, no doubt going back to be with Bell's.


	40. Closure part VII

**Carlisle's POV**

When we pulled up to the offices of Amy J. Watson, there was no denying that my worst nightmare had indeed come true. There off to the right, was the small compact red car that Renee Dwyer and her husband Phil had driven off in earlier. I felt my stomach fall to my feet as I stepped out onto the concrete and slammed the car door behind me.

I had thought I would be angry, I thought I would be so infuriated that I would see red but that wasn't the case. Instead I felt betrayed... I felt vulnerable and betrayed. I barely noticed Jasper take off in a mild sprint and then he was gone. I made my legs move faster and somewhere in my peripheral vision I saw Charlie beside me. When we walked through the doors, I could already hear the yelling.

It was, Jasper, he was telling, Amy everything I had just been thinking. "How dare you!?" He spat out. When I walked around the corner to her office door, I found Renee cowering in a corner with a look of horror across her face. When I couldn't stand to look at her a second more, I sought out Amy. She was as white as a ghost and her eyes were pooling with tears. She met my eyes and whatever she saw there had her on her feet and begging me for forgiveness.

"Please, Mr. Cullen... I-I... can explain! Just hear me out! Please!" Her words meant nothing to me, not a thing at all. I don't know what my face looked like but when I stepped forward, she fell back into her chair. I glared at her and then turned to see Renee. I was done with this woman, _we_ were done with her.

"What the hell are you doing? Was it not enough to kill what little peace, Bella, has found in her life? What more do you want from my daughter? Blood? Money? Her heart?" I couldn't control the way my voice was cracking as I asked. All I could focus on was the fact that I had failed. I failed my family... all of them... Esme, Edward, Bella... my grandchildren. I hated Renee, but right now I hated Amy more. She led her to us... she betrayed us and sold us out.

Renee didn't say a word as I stared at her waiting for an answer, I knew what she wanted, she knew what she wanted, but the odds of getting her to admit it were slim to none. I rounded back on Amy and started digging answers out of her. "What have you done? Tell me now what you have said to her... to Tanya." Amy's mouth fell open and her head was shaking back and forth in the gesture of a _no._ I didn't believe her though, how could I? So I waited, we all waited.

Charlie broke the silence and asked the most important question, "Why would you do this, Amy? What could she of offered you that would break your loyalty to the Cullen's?" It was the one question we had no answer to... well not a concrete answer anyway. Amy looked up and met my gaze once more and answered in a small voice.

"I'm sorrier than you will ever know, Dr. Cullen. I... she...she was going to get money from Bella and pay me in return." I had to struggle to hear the last part, her voice had fallen to a mere whisper and her eyes were downcast in shame. I looked back to Renee and her husband, he seemed to be as shocked by her words as the rest of us. He unwrapped his arms from her and looked over to me and then stepped away quietly and walked out the door. Renee looked as if the world, _her world_ had just burst into flames. In all honesty I couldn't of cared less. All I could see when I looked at her tear filled eyes was the image of Bella alone and uncared for while growing up and then as a young woman entering the Ivy league. How badly I wished my family could of known her then... how badly I wished Edward had gone to Yale and found her sooner. She was my daughter from the first moment I met her, she was always meant to be with us.

When I found my voice, rage had made its way inside my tone. "Common animals have better parenting instincts than you... criminals with issues have more compassionate hearts than you... your a disgrace to anyone who is truly a parent to their children." I turned back quickly to face, Amy. She was still in her seat with a tortured expression on her face, but all I could think about was getting the exact information given to Tanya or anyone else who may have a vendetta against my family. "Who else have you given our information to? Tell me who and what knows anything about the _privacy_ you so willingly threw away for a few hundred dollars. Because I can guarantee you that Bella and Edward would have given her no more than that. And if you had been paying any attention to our family these last years, you would of known that!"

"I didn't give you up to anyone else, Mr. Cullen... I swear to you... I swear!" she cried out to me. I was sick to my stomach again but before I could reply, Jasper jumped in.

"Your word means nothing to us... any of us. You're a liar, and you betrayed us all. So help me god, woman, if you have done anything to put this family and especially those children in harm, I will end you." it was in those words, that fear gripped my heart. I couldn't stand around here being angry or frustrated, I needed to make sure that everyone was okay.

**EPOV**

I watched silently as Bella slept in my arms. She looked so peaceful while she rested there, like nothing could hurt her. It was the only thing I had ever promised her... that I would always be there for her and take care of her. She was my life, my world... Bella and our children were the only things that held any meaning in my life.

I tightened my hold on her and she re-settled into my embrace once more. I smiled a little at the few words that escaped her while she slept, but only because she was absolutely adorable. I closed my eyes and was ready to fall asleep along side her, but I heard my cell chirping in the distance. I didn't want to get up, but I couldn't ignore it. That could have been anyone one calling, my mom, dad, jas... anyone.

I pulled away slowly and headed down the hall and down the stairs to find the ringing. I looked at the screen and saw that of all the people calling right now, it was Paul. We didn't see him as much as we used to, his life revolved around the corporate ladder and social scenes. I on the other hand usually stuck to the family functions and the occasional dinner for the hospital or for Bella's volunteering. We liked it that way, hell _I_ liked it that way. The politics game of a big city was a sure fire way to cause ruckus in a marriage, especially with the way the women on that scene sometimes presented themselves and attempted to claim you.

That aside, I dialed him back and took a deep breath before I had to tell him what was going on. It took only two rings for him to answer. "Edward! Hey man, thought you were dodging my calls." he joked. I let out a nervouse laugh and replied as best I could.

"Never, man. It's just been a hell of a weekend here... too much has happened and is still happening." Paul was silent for a moment but then spoke up.

"Is everything okay with you and Bella? Are the kids okay?" There was a nervous edge to the way he spoke, almost as if he were unsure if he should be talking to me. As messed up a situation we were in, it made me smile. Paul's loyalty lied with Bella... it would always lie with Bella. It probably pleased me more than it should, but knowing that she had his loyalty was a good thing, Paul was indeed one of her best friends. I knew I needed to tell him, so I came clean.

"Bella's parents were looking for her through a private investigator. One that works for our family was contacted and told us. Bella made the decision to see them... well Charlie. She decided to see Charlie, but that Damned woman Renee weezled her way up here and found us some how. We have no idea how.

"What the fuck, Edward!? Why would you let those people come around her!? The kids!? After everything they did to her! You're supposed to look out for her, your supposed to love her more than your own life! How could you be so stupid as to think that they were different? She must be in agony."

Every word he said ate at me. It killed a piece of my pride. I knew that seeing Charlie and then Renee had both been Bella's decision, but I should have been more cautious. I went about this entire situation the wrong way entirely, and now Bella was laying upstairs in our bed broken hearted and in pain. I really did fail her, I failed the kids as well. "I know." was all I said in response to his accusations. It was the only defense I had.

I heard him intake a sharp breath and then he continued on. "Look that was out of line. I know you love her... hell that's an understatement. It's just that I had to see her so broken those first few years at Yale. She never went home, she was never invited. I tried to take her to my family's home, but she always refused. I even tried to stay behind with her one Christmas, but she told me she would never speak to me again if I did. As stubborn as she was, I didn't doubt it. So I relented and left, I honestly cried on Christmas morning when I was with my family, all could see was Bella alone in a dorm room. I have hated her parents every day since then."

The words painted a much clearer vision than the one Bella had. I felt the hate for both Charlie and Renee settle into my bones again. Renee's had already been there, but Charlie's had already faded. It was going to take a lot more than apologies and a few dinners to make that hate go away this round. My life, my Bella was laying in our bed upstairs and trying to find peace in her sleep because of the day she had just had.

I spent the next twenty minutes telling Paul exactly what the weekend had held, and how everything today went down. By the time we hung up, Paul was on the verge of hiring his own Private Investigator to find Renee so he could have a few words with her. I still hadn't heard from my father, so I had no idea what the story was right now. But either way, it wasn't going to be good. That much I knew.

When we hung up, I literally ran up the stairs and back in our room where I found Bella still sleeping and holding my pillow. I smiled at her form and pulled my shirt off to climb in bed with her. I loved feeling her skin underneath my own, it calmed me somehow. When I was resting along side her, I pulled her body into my own and peppered her hair with soft kisses. She was the very best part of me, she made me a better man. I would love her until the day I died, and even then my love would stay with her.

Bella snuggled her face into my chest and the feel of her soft lips touching my bare skin did things to my body that were making it hard to simply just hold her. I let out a shaky breath as her arms wrapped around my center and her legs hooked with my own. If I had been trying to fight it before, it was nothing compared to what I was doing right now. Her bare legs were tangling with mine and her hands traveling over my body while she was asleep. I didn't mind, I rather enjoyed it, but today it felt very selfish of me to find comfort in her embrace. It was I who needed to comfort her, and come hell or highwater, I was going to do just that. With my resolve in place, I gingerly took her hands and kissed her fingers gently. When I had shown love to all ten of her lovely digits, I brought my lips to her neck. I spent the next few minutes enjoying her sweet smell and lapping at the most delicate parts of her ear and throat. She was awake now, and as bad as I felt for being the one to wake her, I was more pleased with her responses.

Her breathing was accelerated and her body was tensing with each nip I bestowed upon her. I too was teetering on the edge and was barely holding on by a thread. The things this woman could do to me by simply breathing was beyond reason. I would cross any river and face any army just to hear her sweet moans and rasps. I always told her that she was my prize in this life, though she ignored the comments and played them down, there were never any truer words spoken. She was indeed the most remarkable being to grace my life... she also brought with her Emma and Ethan, and for that I would never be able to thank her fully.

I continued on my path of kisses and when I reached her mouth, she spoke and I puled my eyes open to meet her waiting ones. "Mmm, good afternoon, Love." She was still peaceful and content. As if the nap she had taken washed away any bad feelings she had been going through earlier. I smiled gently to her and she returned one with love.

"Good afternoon, baby. How are you feeling?" I dropped my lips to her head and rested along side her while I waited for her to answer. It didn't take long, barely even a pause.

"I feel so much better than I did earlier. Thank you for taking care of me, Love." She turned then and rested her head on my chest. I began making lazy patterns on her back.

"Always, baby. I'll always take care of you." It was in that sentence that the horrible things Renee had said to her came barreling back. "Love, you know I would never cheat on you, right? I could never be with another person. You are my life, Bella. I would never leave you without anything... the things Renee said... how she tried to make you think I would ever abandon you... it's proposterous."

I was sitting up now and stroking her face and looking down into her eyes. I could only find love there. She was nodding along with me and rubbing my hands as they rubbed her face. "I know, Edward... I know."

"Do you, love? Do you really know that? Everything we have... everything we have ever had is just as much yours as it is mine. There is no part of me that you don't share. You already have my heart... everything else is just material." She sat up then and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I know... I know." and with that she brought her lips to my own and any lingering thoughts I had on the matter were no longer apart of my vocabulary. We kissed slowly for a long while, just savoring the moment. It didn't take long for things to become more heated, Bella climbed upon my lap and her kisses became more frantic, searching for something and desperately trying to find it. I felt myself following after her, searching for whatever it was that was within our reach.

My hands were roaming her body underneath my shirt she wore. I pulled her to me as tight as I could without hurting her. I needed her as close to me as possible, there was just no way I could have any space between us. I owed her... more than she would ever know, I owed her. When she had first told me she was pregnant with Emma, my world changed. I changed. Bella had altered me forever in an unchanging way. I would always love the woman in my arms, I would always put her and the children she had given us at the top of my list. I knew now what I needed to do about Renee, weird how it all came to me as I was about to make love to my wife, but in that instant it did. Bella had that affect on me, she had the gift of giving me clarity when my mind was in a fog. I wouldn't be half the surgeon I am if it weren't for her.

When I had her panties around her thighs, I freed myself from the confines of my shorts and she brought her body down onto my own. Nothing felt as good as Bella, absolutely nothing. I felt her hips moving against my own, and her gentle breaths were next to my ear. As she rode me, she held my head to her chest. As wonderful as that was, I needed more. Her shirt was still buttoned and I couldn't feel her skin against me.

I moved my hands between us and quickly unbuttoned her shirt with my eyes closed. I couldn't resist the perfect way her body fit with my own. When I had the first three buttons undone, I lay my head to her again and continued undoing the rest. My world was perfect when I felt her warm breasts beneath my cheek, and I took a moment to just rest on them before I started fondeling and playing with her nipples.

"I love you so much, Edward... I don't know how to live without you... promise me you will always be with me." Bella's words were breathless as she moved above me. I felt my throat constrict with angst as I attempted to find the words that would make her understand that I could never leave her... ever.

I found my strength when I looked up into her eyes. She had slowed her pace and was watching me with love and running her right hand through my hair. For a moment it took my breath away and I had to wait for the moment to settle upon me. I took her face in my hands and peppered her with kisses. "Bella... Love, I could never _ever_ leave you, your the most important part of my life... you all are. Emma, Ethan... my love for you all is unbreakabele. I couldn't survive without you, baby. I love you so much."

Her lips silenced me then and her hips went back to work. Having just said those words aloud made the reality of my life come down on me. I had everything. Everything I had ever hoped to have and more. Bella had given me the ladder, she gave us a family. I felt the euphoria sweeping over me and before I could warn her, I spilled into her warm, soft body. I felt her nibbling on my ear softly and dropping tender kisses to my cheek. Instantly I felt horrible that I had been so selfish and not lasted for her. I was about to say those very words aloud, but her finger silenced me. I smiled up to her and kissed her finger and for another twenty minutes, we laid in each others arms and at some point I fell asleep.

When I woke again, it was to the sound of the gate phone ringing throughout the house. It pulled me from my sanctuary of Bella's arms and had me on edge in an instant. If it were Renee, I would annihilate her. I turned to see Bella's face watching the phone ring anxiously and before she could blink again I was out of bed and wrenched the phone from the cradle. "Cullen residence" I answered in a hard tone.

"Edward, it's me, Dad. Its just Charlie, Jasper and myself, can we come up?" I relaxed instantly and hit the code to unlock the gate. My parents code wouldnt let them in without my approval right now. I had the grounds on complete lock down, and if I had blood hounds, they would be roaming the perimeter as well.

I hung up after letting them through and got dressed in my gym shorts and t-shirt that were laying on the ottoman in the corner of the room. When I slipped my shorts on, Bella spoke up and pulled me from my concentration. I had forgotten she was awake. "Is everything okay, Edward?" I went to her immediatley and pulled her naked body into my arms and caressed her face and back. After growing hard in a new record time, I kissed her and nibbled on her ear before answering her.

"It will be, love. I promise." With that, I playfully slapped her butt and made my way toward the door. Before I walked out I called out over my shoulder, "Dad, Charlie and Jasper are on there way to the house, feel free to rest love. Mom is going to keep the kids overnight. Don't worry about anything either, Garrette is with them." I saw her face relax instantly at the reassurance that Garrette was watching over all of them, and again I said a silent thank you that I could give her a life in which that peace of mind was afforded.

When I made my way down stairs, I went straight to my den and poured myself a scotch. I didn't care that it was because I was stressed, I needed that drink to calm my nerves from what news my father was about to bring me. I took my first sip and walked out into the main living area, when I stepped in fully, The front door opened and my father walked in first with Jas and Charlie trailing in behind him. My dad looked like he was on the edge of losing it, Jas looked furious and Charlie... well Charlie looked scared as shit.

"Just tell me." I stated plainly. I had no more patience for the run around. Whatever tidings they were bringing, I just wanted to know so that I could begin to fix it. Jasper was the one to break the news to me.

"It was Amy." I could hear the venom dripping from his words, a mirror of my thoughts at that second. I looked to my father and his eyes were downcast in shame. I had no idea why.

"Dad?" I asked. He brought his eyes up to mine then and the pain I saw there left me humbled and hurting. I had never seen my father look so defeated, never.

"I am _so_ sorry, Edward. Truly I am." He took a deep breath and before he could say another word, Charlie jumped in.

"That investigator was giving, Renee, information about you and Bella. She said something about hoping to get money." I couldn't believe my ears, I didn't understand the money motivation behind Amy's actions, we paid her well, my father and I both. She was far better off than most attorneys in this city, it just didn't make sence. Before I could dwell on that, Jasper jumped in with a name that nearly had my fists through a wall.

"She said that she never gave anything to, Tanya, though." I must have been red, I felt red.

"Sh... I... I swear to god, Jasper, if she comes around I will need you to defend me for a murder count." Charlie flinched in surprise, but whether it was from my anger or my words, I had no idea. Quite frankly, I just didn't care. Unfortunatly, the question he threw at me almost knocked me over.

"Who's this, Tanya, that everyone is so concerned about?" I heard a sharp intake of breath behind me and before I even turned around, I knew it was Bella. My heart fell to my feet at the idea that this was going to stir up the past for her and cause her pain again.

"Why... I mean... is she...?" Bella began trailing off in a loss for words. I was beside her instantly and wrapped her in my arms hugging her to my chest tightly, whispering in her ear, "No, Love. She doesn't know anything. She will never come near you again... any of you." Bella hugged me back tightly with her head tucked into my body and didn't move to acknowledge the guys, not even Charlie. I answered his question as best I could without going into detail. I was ashamed of my past with her, and as much as the question deserved an answer, I wouldn't give one with Bella in my arms and already a nervouse mess.

"She is a person we made sure to keep away from my family." Charlie gave me a look that said he knew there was more to it than that, and from the way he looked at Bella in my arms then back to me, I think he made a connection all on his own. I saw a glimmer of anger cross his face but before he said anything, Jasper continued on.

"I am drawing papers up as we speak, well... my office is. Amy is going down, and so help me god, That woman, Renee will not ever come near any of you again." I was about to thank him, but Bella popped her head up. I wasn't preparred for the words that came out of her mouth.

"Not before I see her again." There was a fierceness in her voice, and I knew from personal experience that when she used that tone, there was no deterring her. I cupped her face gently and watched her eyes carefully as I spoke to her.

"Why, Baby? You don't need to do that, I'll make her go away, she won't ever hurt you again." Bella was already shaking her head no before I even finished my sentence.

"I need to do it, Edward. For me, not her." I watched the love of my life's eye's water as she said it, her expression unreadable and her jaw set. I pulled her into me tighter and nodded an agreement as I rubbed her back. The others in the room excused themselves into the other room to give us some privacy.

I knew that, Bella needed better closure than what she got earlier, but I didn't like it. Hell, I hated the idea of her going back out to see, Renee. I hadn't even been given the whole story from the guys yet, but what kind of mother does that to their only child? I couldn't even fathom hurting the kids, ever.

Bella looked up into my eyes, knowing well what I was thinking I'm sure. She took a deep breath and rubbed her small hands up and down the length of my arms before talking. "I have a very good reason for wanting this over now, baby." I watched her bite her lip and her gaze traveled down to my chest where her hands followed shortly.

"Why, love? Why do you _want _to do this now?" She brought her eyes up to meet my own and her expression was torn. Like she didn't know how to respond. It made me anxious and my imagination was beginning to go wild. She met my eyes again then and whatever she saw in them seemed to make her decision. She grabbed my hands in her own and said in a very low, gentle voice, "I don't want to tell you right now, but trust me, it's a good reason... just please trust me."

I couldn't find an argument good enough to argue with that, I trusted Bella with everything. So there we stood in the living room facing each other, her with her secret, and me with my trust.

**BPOV**

I couldn't tell him that I was pregnant, we deserved that moment to be surrounded by loving family and happiness, not what we were currently facing. I wanted to talk to Renee in hopes that we would both have closure and could move on completely. There was no salvaging a relationship with her, but at least there was a chance with Charlie.

He had missed so much in my life because of her. He missed Emma and Ethan entering the world, he missed birthdays and holidays. At least with this baby, he would have a chance to experience this with us.

When I had come home earlier, I felt nauseus. My head was throbbing and my breasts ached. I knew from experience what the combination meant, and on top of that, I had messed up my pill cycle on accident just weeks before. I didn't panic about it or even worry. Edward had told me that when I was ready, he was ready and there was no reason to even tell him. I think he liked having a surprise to wait for.

I had forgotten all together until when I was throwing up the coffee I had sipped at Starbucks. It hit me than what was happening, so I grabbed a test from under the sink and did it while he was still downstairs with the boys. Sure enough, two pink plus signs confirmed what I had been thinking, we were having a baby.

As crappy as the day had started out, it was ending on a rather good note, I wanted to tell him right away, but again, we deserved it to be better than with this surrounding us.

Now standing in front of him and knowing I couldn't tell him was killing me, but at the same time, I knew I needed to settle things with Renee first. I needed to say goodbye and be done with it. He held me there in silence, and silently I began planning my goodbye to my mother.

* * *

**A/N: **I feel horrible about the wait. But at least I didn't leave you hanging. You know the secret. I was really boggled down with finals, and then I took an intersession over the winter, so it had been non stop for me. I will get the next chapter up by Friday! I promise!


	41. Closure Part 8

**BPOV**

Dinner was tense, well I was tense. Edward and I hadn't talked again about me seeing my mom, or even why I wanted to. It was as if he was working through it in his head first, because when I would look at him, he avoided my eyes and went back to deep in thought.

I hated keeping my pregnancy from him, I was bursting on the inside with happiness and I wanted nothing more than to share it with him. I would never come right out and admitt how much I loved being pampered by him when I was carrying both, Emma and Ethan. How I looked forward to laying in bed and having him rub my stomach and wrap me and my large belly in his arms as we drifted off to sleep. Even making love while I was pregnant was a different experience. Edward, being his cautious self was always so loving, soft and caring with me. How he would rub my body all over as he moved in and out of me and then how I would wake in the middle of the night to find him talking to the baby and laying next to my swollen middle.

I wanted all that to hurry up and come agian, because right now as I looked at him, I could see that his imagination was running wild with worry. He had no doubt already convinced himself that I didn't love him or that I believed things Renee had said about him. I would never think so low of him, Edward was beyond a good person, Dad... husband. I was lucky to have him.

That being said, I was ready to face Renee. All I really wanted to do was say my peace and leave. Then I would be free... _we_ would be free.

I had been day dreaming over what Edward's reaction would be when he found out about the baby when I heard, Carlisle, trying to get my attention. "Bella? Sweetie, are you feeling okay?" I'm sure I looked as flustered as I felt, I simpy nodded my head and tried to pay better attention to the conversations going on around me. Jasper, Charlie and Carlisle had stayed for dinner after they came back from Amy's office, the only thing they could talk about it seemed was how best to handle the situation.

I looked up again to get a read on Edward, but when I saw his face, he looked anguished. He finally met my eyes for the first time since I had told him I wanted to see Renee, and all I saw was saddness. He looked so defeated, so guilty. "Baby?" I called out to him. He met my eyes and it looked as if he was about to say something, instead though he got up and left the table.

"Excuse us..." I said to the guys as I went after him. I rounded the corner to the living area and saw his form retreat down the hall toward his office. I picked up my pace a little until I reached his door. I found him in front of the small bar he had for night caps. I watched as he poured himself a scotch and then went to sit in the couch off to the left that faced our wedding portraite.

He didn't know I was in the door way, his back was turned to me. I just stood there watching him for a moment without saying anything. I don't know what I was expecting, but he said no words and it made my heart squeeze. I made my way inside his office and took a seat next to him. He didn't move, or acknowledge me, instead he stared at our wedding portrait that was above his fire place.

The silence was killing me, but even worse, so was his pain. I knew it was my fault he was feeling this way, so I decided right then that I would end it. It was ridiculous for him to be feeling so glum when we had wonderful news that he could be celebrating instead. "That was one of the best day's ever..." I whispered while kicking off my shoes and curling up to his side while resting my head against his chest. I felt him exhale in content and his arm wrapped around me and his lips kissed at my hair.

"For me too, love... for me too." I smiled at the softness of his words. The way he could relax with me in his arms did many things for my ego, though I would never tell him that. I placed a soft kiss to his chest and then began drawing lazy patterns on his pecks while still staring up at our photo.

I wouldn't keep this news from him anymore, it was wrong of me to have made that decision. We were a team and we chose honesty in our marriage, always, no matter how much I wanted the circumstances to be better, we would just have to make sure that things were fixed sooner rather than later.

"So..." I began.

"So..." he echoed. I smiled wider and chuckled into his body. His arm squeezed me tighter for a mement and he chuckled as well.

"Crazy day, huh" His laugh was even louder now, and my face was bouncing with the vibaration of his chest as I lay with my cheek resting there.

"Yes, love. Crazy day indeed." Before I could respond, his lips were at my ear and his breath was making my heart beat speed up. "I'm sorry that this is happening, love." And he was, truly he was. In every sence of the word he was sorry that, Renee, had come and stirred up trouble for us. It was a topic that I was tired of talking about, mostly because I had better things to think about and even more, I had better things to occupy our minds.

I turned to him then and placed a leg on either side of his body so that I was straddeling him. When I looked down to the man beneath me, I smiled wider and settled myself down upon his lap. Edwards eyes were lazy and relaxed, like this was the most relaxing position he had ever been in.

Edward placed his scotch on the side table and then let his hands roam my body and hair. "Are you relaxed, baby?" I asked him in a soft voice. When he nodded his agreement, I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my forehead against his.

"Mmm, baby... I need you." he whispered into the space between us. I felt him pull my hips down over his hard member and groaned as he rubbed against me in the most delicious way. My breath caught from the feel of him beneath me, and before I could think straight, I was desperately trying to unbutton his shirt to feel him more freely.

His hands gripped my wrists and stopped me from accomplishing what I so badly wanted, and I couldnt help the way I whimpered in protest. "Love..." he kissed my face all over in between words. "If I take you... I won't be able to be quiet..." As smart as his words were, I couldn't make myself stop. But he didn't seem to mind, and just as he was about to pull my shirt off, I felt his hands move under the hem to get a grip on the material, but when he did, his fingers grazed over my stomach and it pulled me back to what I had wanted to say to him.

I pulled away quickly and the look on his face showed he wasn't appreciating that. I just smiled at him and then kissed his nose. "Love?" he asked. I just continued smiling and sat back fully on his lap. "Bella... what's going on, baby?" There was a hint of a smile on his lips and it only fueled me further. I placed my hands on either side of his face and gently kissed him softly and slowly. I felt him relax into me and pull me closer to him. I was wrapped fully in my love's arm's and the kiss we were sharing was breathtaking. I slowly began to stop, but I made no effort to move from his strong embrace. I could think of no better way to tell him we were having a baby, than here in his arms. I brought my lips to his ears and began.

"I love you so much, Edward... so much." I kissed his lobe and held him tightly as I continued. "Everything good in my life, I have because of you. I wake up every day just so happy, Edward... I'm so happy."

"Oh, Baby... me too, love, me too." Edward was kissing me again and attempting to deepen it, but I was focused. I nibbled his lips and then continued on once more.

"You know what I miss though, love?" My words had dropped to a soft whisper now, and before I could continue, Edward was sitting straight up at attention instead of in the low relaxed way he just was. His movements startled me, but I made myself calm down. I should have known this reaction would come first.

"What have I stopped doing, love? Tell me and I will fix it, baby... just tell me." His words were nervous and his hands were stroking my face, down over my shoulders and then down my arms. I sat back and looked into his eyes and told him exactly what it was I missed.

"I miss the way you would wrap your arms around me and my belly when I was pregnant... the way I would wake up and find you talking to the baby in the middle of the night... how you make love to me so gently when I'm carrying our child inside of me..."

A smile erupted over his face as I finished and the nervouse way he had been holding me moments before was replaced with more gentle hands. "You miss that, love?" Edwards words were gentle and warm and his eyes were a reflection of that as well. I bit my bottom lip and nodded my head as the nerves for what I was about to say were making there way to the surface.

Before I could dwell on that too much, my lips were surrounded by, Edwards. He kissed me hard and with passion. I melted into him and for a long moment and we just enjoyed each other. He pulled back but moved his lips over to whisper in my ear. "Do you want to make a baby with me love? Do you want me to give you a piece of us to carry again?" his lips were kissing along my neck and jaw as he said it, his arms holding me tighter again. This was my chance, he had just walked in the door I had willingly opened for him. I took a deep breath and smiled and pulled back to see his face as I said what I knew would make him happy.

"You already have..." My face hurt from the smile that was plastered there, I didn't need to see my reflection to know it was ridiculous. He was still for a few moments but then the most brilliant smile came over him and his gaze traveled to my stomach, his hands also journeyed there soon after.

His eyes were lit with excitement and the hopeful way he smiled at me had me giggling now. "Baby, were pregnant!?" I nodded my head enthusiastically and wrapped my arms around his neck tightly.

"We are. I'm having a baby, Love! _Were_ having a baby!" He was off the couch and spinning me around in his office instatnly. I wrapped my legs tightly around him and laughed as he partially yelled/ laughed his appreciation.

"Oh god, Love! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he yelled out with love and laughter. This was the way we were meant to spend our lives, this was how we lived each day... happy. I was thankful to have at least this much return for the day. It felt as if our lives were followed by a dark cloud ever since Renee and Charlie sought me out. As horrible as that sounds, thats how it felt.

Edward stopped turning and gently placed me on my feet in front of him. His arms never released me, and the way he handled me was with absolute care... as if I were glass. I smiled at that, because I knew that it would be that way for a long while, at least as long as I was pregnant and even for a few months after the baby was born.

I looked up at him and smiled, but his eyes were glossy and it caught me off guard. I ran my hands through his hair and kissed him gently before asking him if he was okay. "This is what you want, right?" I felt silly for asking the question, but hearing his answer was just reassurance I needed.

"I want anything and everything with you, love... especially a family. I love that you're carrying our baby... that you're the woman who I share a life with. God, yes this is what I want... always."

Tears made their way down my face without my permission. They were happy tears, but I hadn't been expecting those beautiful words. He wiped them away with the pad of his thumbs and followed the trails with a kiss on both cheeks. "You're the love of my life, Bella."

I felt the love for him spread through my body and I relaxed into his arms. "You're the love of _my _life, Edward." We stayed together in his office, just holding each other and enjoying the moment of happiness surrounding us.

There was a knock at the door and Edward called out for them to enter. He never moved though, he just continued to hold me and buried his face in my hair.

"I heard some yelling, and I just wanted to make sure you were both okay. I know it's been a trying day, but just remember that you are both in this together." The sound of Carlisle's nervous voice pulled me from the peace I was in. I looked at him with confusion for a moment.

"Yelling?" I didn't remember the yelling. Edward started laughing and as he did, he rubbed the length of my back and then kissed my nose.

"Dad must be talking about my moment of excitement." Edwards voice was light and slightly embarassed.

"Oh dear..." Carlisle muttered. My eyes went wide as I realized what he must of thought that excitement was. Before I could correct him, Edward was once again laughing out loud so hard that he was shaking, and me being wrapped in his arms was shaking too.

I couldn't help but giggle at the situation, but I playfully slapped his arm and shookd my head with a laugh. "That's not the case, Carlise." He looked relieved, but that lasted half a second until he turned bright red. No doubt mortified by what he had assumed was going on.

Edward must have felt some pitty for him, because he did what he could to sate him. "Sorry, dad. That was just too good of a moment _not_ to laugh at. We weren't fighting... I promise you. But we can't tell you either..." Carlisle looked like he was about to protest, but Edward quickly added the next part, and knowing Carlisle, he wouldn't need anymore explanation.

"What I mean is... well that we _can't_ tell you anything until mom is around. You know she would never forgive you if you heard something big without her present." I smiled at the familiar words that Carlisle had told us when he found us with a sonogram at the hospital. Apparantly he did too, because the smile that lit up his face was rivaled only by the sun.

Carlisle cleared his throat and straightened his back while speaking. "Well then...umm, I... oh boy." We all laughed then and before Carlisle could break his own rule, we all went back out to the diner table to finish our food.

**EPOV**

I sat in my seat at the dinner table with a silly grin plastered on my face. I was esctatic, thrilled, scared and overwhelmed all at the same time. Mind you none of the feelings were because I didn't want the baby, it was the exact opposite. I was over the moon about the baby.

I was just that so much was going on at this moment and it was hard to concentrate on the overwhelming joy coursing through me. I wanted so badly to just enjoy the news and share it with the family, but looking around at the table I saw Charlie. He looked like he _felt_ out of place. I didn't know how I felt about him right now, I didn't know if I could trust him.

It was hard for me to have compassion for a person who had hurt my love so deeply. What I had felt for him early on was almost completely faded now. Thought I knew he was happy to be reunited with Bella, I couldn't let myself shake the idea that he may have just been after money as well. I didn't want to let my guard down again and fail Bella. I was protecting more than her alone now, she was also carrying our baby.

My family was the only thing that mattered, and tonight when Emma and Ethan came home, I would be even more on guard. I knew I needed to talk to Charlie alone, warn him myslef about what I expected for the kids and Bella. If he were to cross me, Chief of Police or not, I would end him.

Dinner was finished in silence, between Jas and Charlie, each took turns giving Bella, myself and my father odd looks. More than likely because of the way we were all smiling.

I sent Bella off up stairs to shower or do whatever she wanted, that left just us guys down stairs, and me my chance to speak with Charlie. I think my dad senced that that was what I wanted, because he pulled Jasper aside for a sidebar and that left me able to have the conversation I needed with Bella's dad.

"Charlie, I would like to speak with you." He was already watching me with an expectant face as I had entered the living room. I went to the couch and sat down on the edge of my seat and waited for him to join me. He didn't delay, almost instantly, he was sitting and mirroring my posture, and I began.

"Everything that is going on... Renee... just... all of it. I need to know that you weren't involved with any of it. I need to know that I can trust you." He didn't say a word, he just watched me with careful eyes for a long moment and then hit me with his response.

"Now I know that I have no actual rights at this moment, but first of all, Edward, can I trust you?" His words had caught me off guard, I had no idea what he meant by them, and in all honesty, I was offended. My face was a mirror for my emotions no doubt, but he just pushed forward. "This, Tanya... you had an affair with her didn't you?" his tone was colder now, detached from the emotinal man he had been this morning at breakfast. I didn't owe him an answer, but I would also not sit by and allow him to sully my love for Bella either. I answered because I felt we deserved better than that opinion, Bella deserved better than that opinion.

"I was dating Tanya when I met Bella. I use the word dating very loosely, she was someone I was trying to end things with actually. Bella came into my life like a bolt of lightning and I was blind to anything else... especially, Tanya." Charlie looked like he wanted to say something, but I quickly kept going. "And your right, you have no rights to ask such questions. I know you are her father, but you haven't been around. Renee may have been the initial cause, but you made the decision to abide by it."

Charlie was sitting straight as a rod, no doubt weighing the options of tackling me here in my own living room. It was a low blow, that I knew, but in that moment, I just didn't care. I watched him with tight eyes as he calmed down and then relaxed his shoulders, I did the same and he picked up this time.

"All the same, she's my daughter, and I don't ever want to see that look in her eye like I did today when this, "Tanya" person was mentioned. She deserves to be happy, please... just keep her happy." I felt like an ass for sure now. Of course he only wanted her happy, and I too never wanted to see that terror in her eyes again either, Tanya had done far too much to us in the past, and I would see to it that she would never come near us again.

"Can I trust you, Charlie?" I really needed to know the answer to that, because right now, I just didn't know. He met my eyes straight ahead and answered me boldly and proud.

"You can trust me... if anyone as much as attempts to hurt this family, I will be the first one with a shovel and a shotgun searching for a shallow grave."

I couldn't escape the smile that burst over my face, I knew now without a doubt, that I could indeed trust Charlie Swan.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah... so Friday = Sunday for me. I suck, I know :( please forgive me.**


	42. Closure part vx

**BELLA**

I was sitting out on the deck and taking in the beauty surrounding my eyes. The grass was just freshly cut, the sky was blue and off in the distance I could hear absolutely nothing. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath... I wanted to taste the moment I was in, just looking at it wasn't enough.

The house was completely empty right now. Edward had taken Charlie and the kids out to sight see for a few hours and against his wishes, I stayed behind to just have a moment to myself. I usually hated being away from the kids and Edward... I hated it now that I thought about not being with them in this second, but another part of me, a much needier part, told me that I needed to just take some time and filter things.

It had been the longest weekend of my life. Well... the _new_ longest weekend of my life. This one dethroned the horrible weekend I had found out Edward was taken, and this beat that one by a long shot. Not only had my parents waltzed back into my life, but my mothers lies had come out and left those of us in the line of fire staring down a chamber with shock and disbelief. To add another shrimp on the barbie, the evil woman was going to try and get money out of me... right, like my youth, hapiness and pride werent enough for her to have stolen. I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath, if I thought about it for too long, then I would only get angrier.

With a last look around and a quick pep talk, I stood and made my way back into the main house to get dinner started. I pulled the roast from the refrigerator and began prepping the vegetables and potato's. I was lost in the task at hand and deep into a rythem with the music I had turned on, that I hadn't heard the garage door opening up. I heard the kids getting out of the car before I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist. I smiled at the gesture and leaned back against the familiar smell of Edwards cologne and just rested there for a moment. While I did that, he rubbed soft circles over my stomach and kissed my hair. I smiled wider at the feel of him loving our baby that was growing inside of me right now. He loved us... all of us.

"How are you and the baby doing, love?" I sighed in contentment before I answered him.

"Were perfect, baby... thank you for asking." Edward unwrapped us from his arms and knelt down to my stomach for a moment and kissed where our son or daughter lay right now. I giggled and smiled down to him as he stood back to his earlier position so that no one would catch him there.

We hadn't told anyone yet... unless you count, Carlisle, but he didn't count to me, because we didn't necessarily tell him, we simply planted a seed... and watered as well as fertilized it. Okay, okay.... Carlisle knew. But he was doing a wonderful job playing dumb and not bringing it up. Although, anytime he and Esme were in the same room as us, he seemed really chipper. No doubt wondering when we would drop the news for everyone to know.

Edward and I had decided to tell his parents first, then the kids would know and before Charlie left, I would let him know as well. Edward has asked me at first if I wanted to do it all at once, but I chose not to. As crappy as it sounds, this was too intimate a thing to share with everyone all at one time... Charlie and I werent exactly close, although that was neither his or my fault, that was just the way it was. The Cullens were my family... they always had been. It didn't seem right bringing anyone else into that circle yet, but we were going to try... Charlie and I both were going to try.

I was pulled from my day dreams by Ethans arms wrapping around my waist over Edwards. If there was one thing, Ethan, hated, it was sharing me with Edward. I laughed as Edward sighed dramatically and stepped away with a smile. I laughed harder when Ethan looked over at him with a victorious grin and snuggled in deeper to my hip. "I saw her first!" Edward teased from his spot at the island. Ethan gripped me tighter and turned to his dad proudly and answered with, "She gave me life!"

Edward and I both burst into a fit of laughter and leaned down to kiss my little man. He was Edward all over again, the mini me version. Edward came and scooped him up and hugged him tightly as Ethan laughed along with us now. "Touché" Edward got out through jagged breaths and a silly grin. I smiled at Ethan and winked to him, I had to admitt, that was one hell of a response. I think Edward knew he was trumped and conceded quietly but instead of whining, he took Ethan upstairs to get his shoes and sweater off.

I giggled and went back to my work, but I could feel a stare on me. I popped my head up, and there in the corner was Charlie. He looked like he was unsure of what to do or where to go. I knew that feeling, I used to be that way when Edward and I had first gotten married and had huge family dinners with not just his immediate family, but the extended as well. I took pitty on Charlie and smiled with a nod for him to join me.

Silently, Charlie, sat down in a stool facing me and watched me prep dinner. I never felt the need to break an awkward silence, but for the first time ever, I really wanted to. I sighed dramatically and looked up at him with a smile. Charlie watched me carefully and looked as if he thought he should offer me help. I felt bad instantly and giggled at his expression.

"You need some help, Bells?" his voice was so unsure and his eyes were the same confused, worried look as well.

"Nah, I'm used to being the cook here" I joked. Just then, Edward was back in the kitchen and wrapped around my body once more. I couldn't of wiped the smile off of my face if I tried. I was happy... Edward made me happy.

Charlie cleared his throat and stood from his stool. I popped my head up to see what he was doing, but he just called over his shoulder that he was going to rest for a little bit. I just nodded a yes and went back to my happy place... resting against my loving husband.

Not long after Charlie left the room, Ethan called out for Edward that he needed help. I knew that since he asked for Edward, that he was in the bathroom. I giggled at the fact that Ethan was too proud to ask me for any type of assistance when it came to the bathroom. Edward chuckled and kissed my neck before running up the stairs to help his replica.

Emma made her way in and sat at the counter watching me do the prep work. I looked up after a few moments when I realized she hadn't spoken yet. Her face was worried and her eyes were sad, it broke my heart. "Sweetheart, what's got you down?" I asked her. She took a deep breath and rested her cheek against her palm and shook her head as if to say nothing.

I stopped the prep and washed my hands then grabbed her a rootbeer and myself an orange juice and started over again. "Emma... you can tell me anything, you know that right?" She just nodded her head and focused her pretty brown eyes on the rootbeer bottle. I waited patiently and took a drink of my orange juice. Finally, she broke the silence, "I just miss someone is all." she practically mumbled the whole thing and I had to strain to hear her.

"Who do you miss, Emma?" I was wracking my head with names of people who it may be, but aside from Edwards family, I had no idea who it could be. I was about to start naming people off, but she came clean all on her own.

"I miss, Logan" Who the hell was, Logan!? Calmly, Bella,I chanted to myself.

"Who is, Logan, sweetie?" my heart was racing with worry, but that died as soon as she answered.

"He's in my class... he sits next to me at lunch too... but I don't think he likes me very much." My heart swelled and then broke all at the same time. Emma had her first crush. Granted she was only six, but a crush is a crush and I wasn't about to belittle it.

"Why do you think he doesn't like you? Is he mean to you, baby?" Amazing how the anger for a six year old boy can grow at just the idea that he's being a typical boy to your little girl. I reminded myself they were six... not sixteen. That thought however brought on a whole new pain and worry at the thought that eventually... she would be sixteen.

I didn't get the chance to hear her explain, because two seconds later, Edward and Ethan came waltzing about the kitchen as if they were two hungry lumber jacks. Emma's eye's widened as she took in their appearance and shook her head no to me as if pleading not to bring it up. I gave her a discreet wink and focused on my boy's.

I want to say that I was able to give Ethan and Edward my undivided attnetion, but that just wasn't the case. Inside my mind right now, I was doing a happy dance. I was more than just a little excited that Emma and I were creating a bond that only the two of us were in on. We now had a secret... just the two of us, I was her confidant. Any mother would agree I hope, that if your child is going to confide, that at least it's in you.

Edward watched me with a curious look on his face, but I was doing my damdest not to give anything away. I would smile and distract him with kisses to his lips, cheeks and nose. It seemed to do the trick, and when he didn't think anyone was watching, he would caress my stomach and whisper his excitement about our newest growing baby.

Life was just great... I was happy, Edward was happy and my children were for the most part on the same page as us. Emma was doing her best to be social with Ethan, but I could see the ache for this young Logan that she carried in her eyes. It reminded me of what I looked like when I looked in a mirror during the time, Edward and I had been parted.

"Love, is Emma okay? She seems so down..." Aha.. Edward _had_ caught on. I turned to see him watching Emma with a concerned look, and just as he was about to go scoop her up and interrogate her, I stopped him.

"She's just tired, baby... add my dad's visit and your mom's impromptu fun filled Saturday, and you have your self a worn out little girl." He seemed to buy that, and took a deep regrett filled breath. He huffed it out and remained where he had been before, attached to myside and sneaking kisses to my neck and belly.

Charlie had come out of hiding at one point and we all dove into conversation about the city and the sights they had taken him to see. I coudln't help but feel tension in the room and a heaviness over the conversation that hadn't been there before. I knew that it was because of all that had transpired with Renee, but all the same, I didn't like it.

While Edward and Charlie spoke about mileage on my X-5 vs Edward's Toureg, my mind went to Renee. I knew I needed to see her... I didn't really want to anymore, my bravado had sincerely worn off since I had come to the decision to do it, but I also knew that if we were going to have any closure on this issue, then I needed to let go and make my peace. I didn't want to carry this with me anymore.

I was pulled from my thoughts by Ethan's whining. I went ahead and excused myself to get them in bed, against Edwards adamat refussal for me to stop eating, I went ahead and did it anyway. When the kids were tucked in and the nightlights were on, I made my way down stairs and back to the dinner table. What I found there thought, was not a happy sight.

Edward and Charlie were staring eachother down and I could tell that I had about five good seconds before Edwards patience wore off and he kicked Charlie out of the house forever. I hurried to his side and grabbed Edwards face gently, "What is it, baby? What happened?" I honestly didn't want to hear a word from Charlie until I acknoweldged my husband first. I felt my love's jaw relax almost upon my touch and after a secong longer, he was on his feet and holding me to him. I was confused, but my response was a mirrior of his own. I just held him to me and rubbed a rythem on his back. I had no idea what had caused him to be so upset, but then I heard Charlie sigh and it set me off.

"What are you doing?" my tone was angry and adjitated. Charlie's face seemed to be caught off guard by me, but he stuttered a response anyway.

"I-I...we... it was just a misunderstanding."

My patience was wearing real thin right now, and the fact that I didn't believe a word he just said added to it. "Now you listen here, Charlie. You will _not_ come into _my home_ and cause problems, do you understand? You're here right now, because Edward helped me make that decision. So whatever grief your giving him, it better stop or so help me you will never come near this family again."

I was shaking now, and Edward was trying to hold me and calm my nerves, but it was too late, the flood gates were open. All the anger that had been sitting dorment inside of me all these years was coming to a head, and apparently the quickest route to is wasn't through me at all, it was through making issues with my husband.

Charlie was getting ready to expain something, but I stopped him. I took a deep breath and said one last thing. "You know Charlie, as a child, I had absolutely no control over my surroundings. I couldn't have a say on my home, my life or even the people my mother hung around with. I was a prisoner in her world. But I am _not_ a child anymore. I am an adult, and this is my home. Don't you forget that." When I finished, I excused myself and headed up the stairs. If Edward was about to finish off what he had been about to do earlier, I wasn't going to stop him. I made it into the comfort of our room and went to sit on my side of the mattress. Not even five seconds later, Edward, was closing the door behind him and kneeling in front of me.

"Baby, are you alright?" He rubbed the length of my arms and when I didn't answer him, he cupped my cheek and made me look into his eyes. That was my undoing, and I fell apart again, for what seemed like the twentieth time this weekend. It seemed that all I could do since Charlie and Renee walked back into my life was cry, and it was pissing me off. I found my strength to stop and asked what I knew I should have down stairs.

"What happened down there?" my words were shaky and I was afraid to hear the answer. Edwards brow furrowed and he took a deep breath and answered me honestly.

"Charlie made a comment... basically he... he made it sound as if I were too demanding with you... because I was trying to get you to stay and eat..."

Anger rose in my body at an alraming rate. How dare he!? Edward was only thinking of me and the baby... he would never... _could _never be overbearing with me. As if he could read my mind, he said the very words aloud.

"...I swear, love... I was only thinking of you and the baby! I would never talk to you like that, I love you..." I pulled him to me and kissed him hard. No wonder he had looked so angry, Charlie had basically made him out to be an ogre, and in doing that he made me out to be a pushover, which I could proudly say I wasn't.

There was a knock at our door and before I could stand and open it, Edward was off the floor and swung it open. He looked ready to fight, but instead of a grown man, it was Ethan standing there in all of his three foot glory with messy hair and a flashlight. The strain in Edwards body lessened immediately upon seeing Ethan's little body cower back from his intimidating stance, and instead of asking what was wrong, he scooped him up and brought him into our bed without even saying a word. I watched with a smile as Ethan made his way into the center of the bed with a happy grin and a victorious sigh.

I got up from the bed and made my way to the dresser to find a full nightgown, I figured with Ethan taking up residence for the night, I wouldnt be wearing my husbands shirt or getting any loving. As soon as I opened the drawer, there was another knock. I watched Edward get up from reading his book in the ottoman in the corner to see who it was. Once again, he was met with a tiny smile and he again scooped up our child and brought her to the bed with Ethan. Emma gave me a tired wave and a matching yawn to go with it. I winked at her and made my way to the bathroom to change.

When I made it back out into the bedroom, Edward was in bed with the kids and talking to them as they giggled about some randome thing he said. I stayed in the door way for a moment and took in my life. That man had given us a family... he had given _me_ a family. Even before we were graced with Emma, he took me into his life and made me apart of the love and life that was the Cullens.

In that instant, I wasn't angry at Charlie and Renee. I was thankful. I was thankful because had things been different, I would have never been determined to go to Yale, or be a writer... which in turn means I would of never come to Chicago... moved into the neighborhood where Alice lived and so on and so forth. It really is true that bad things happen for a reason. In my case, it was so that I could find and cherish the man laying in bed next to our children... in the home that he built me... the home he built us.

I crawled in beside Emma on my side of the mattress and snuggled her into me. Everything was going to be okay, I knew that... I had always known that, but in the course of a weekend I had been confronted with a past that made it easy to forget that I had it so good now. I was at peace... all I needed was my family. With that thought firmly in place, I made a decision and hoped that Edward would go along with it. I reached over the kids heads and stroked his hair to get his attention, it worked. He was on his side watching me now and I mouthed I love you to him. He smiled warmly to me and mouthed 'thank you' to me as he brought his gaze to our giggling children. My heart stuttered and the rightness of this moment washed over me, and then I began...

"You know... Dad and I have a big surprise for you both..." I looked over to Edward to get a read on his thoughts and I was met with a wide smile and a nod for the go ahead. I felt the bed shift as both Emma and Ethan turned on their tummies to see me better. I smiled at their expressions and did my best not to just blurt this out... I wanted to make this last. Before I could continue, Ethan made a guess.

"ooh... is it a new puppy? I want a puppy!" And he genuinely looked like he did too. His eyes were filled with wonder and his thoughts seemed to be far away now, I could see the resemblence of Edward hardest at moments like this. I just smiled and shook my head no. Emma was next to make a guess.

"How about a baby? Are you having a baby?" Her eyes lit up and her little head popped up off her palms. Ethan snapped out of his daze and suddenly the room seemed very small. I hadn't actually thought they would really guess it! I looked like a deer in the headlights as I turned to Edward and found him with a surprised expression and a smile so wide you could have sworn you were looking at a billboard model for toothpaste.

I opened and closed my mouth many times and before I could think of a response, Edward confirmed Emma's guess. "Yes... mommy's going to have a baby." He sounded so happy and proud as he said it. I watched Emma and Ethan share a surprised face and then simultaneously they turned back to my direction. Ethan was the first to comment.

"So I'm gonna be a _big_ brother!?" his jaw was slack and his eyes were dancing with the possibility. I found my voice and answered him.

"Yup... your gonna be a big brother." Ethan was smiling now and did and air fist pump as he got to his knees. He looked to Emma and she was smiling to him with happiness at his new found place. As if this moment weren't precious enough, she sat up, pulled Ethan into a hug and whispered, "It worked" to him. Edward and I stole a confused glance at one another and then looked back to the kids.

"What worked, Emma?" I asked. This was getting more interesting by the second. She giggled and Ethan just outright laughed, but after he found his voice, he answered for himself.

"I prayed that I would not be the baby anymore." I sat up and giggled at his confession. When he was snuggled into my arms and resting his head on my shoulder I told him my own little secret.

"You'll alway's be my baby, Ethan... you both will." It was true, no matter how old they got or how old I got, I would always see them as my tiny babies. All of a sudden, Ethan was out of my arms and off the bed heading for the door. I was afraid he was angry at the thought of me having a baby and I called out to him in worry at the same time Edward did as well. Ethan turned and looked at us like we were insane, but he gave us an answer without us even having to ask.

"I'm gonna be a big brother... and that means I can't be sleeping in my mom and dad's room anymore." and with that, he walked out the room and we heard his foot steps running down the hall. As if right on queue, Emma was off the bed and bolting for the hall as well. I looked to Edward and he looked to me, but Emma stopped at the door and smiled before saying, "Well I'm the oldest, and if Ethan's not sleeping in here... than neither am I!"

Edward and I were rolling toward eachother laughing at the whole scene. What a day! I had changed the game plan a little, but thinking about it now, it was only right that Ethan and Emma know before anyone else. They were going to be affected more than anyone else would... and they earned that right.

I felt Edward kiss my lips and all too soon, he was off the bed. I frowned as I opened my eyes and saw him heading for the door, but as soon as he reached it, he shut it and locked it and then made his way to my side of the bed. My breath caught as I watched him strip off his pants on his way there, and as soon as he was infront of me, he pulled back my covers and went to pull off my panties.

I didn't say a word, and neither did he. Instead I closed my eyes as he kissed a trail from my ankles to my belly over and over again. I ran my fingers through his hair gently and sighed in contentment as he rubbed along my belly. God, this was heaven. When I was sure I would die from need, he whispered gently to where our baby was resting inside of me right now. "I love you so much already... I can't wait to meet you."

I felt tears building in my eyes as he continued on. The way he loved me... our chidren... it always choked me up. When I thought he could do nothing more romantic, he went ahead and did.

"Bella... I love you more than my own life... I can't ever be without you, love. All I will ever be is because of you. Anything I have ever held dear to me came from you." he stopped briefly and kissed my stomach then my nose and finally my lips. I tried to pull him to me so I could take him fully, but he pulled back and gently laid a gold, heart shaped locket onto my stomach and then kissed over my heart.

I gently took the locket into my hand and admired its delicate beauty. "Oh, Edward... it's beautiful" I mumbled. He didn't say a word, he just watched me admire my gift in wonder. I turned it to get a full on look, but when I did, I noticed the engraving and it took my breath away. There in delicate script were the words, "_More than My Own Life_" I pulled my eyes to his and in that instant nothing in the world mattered besides that man. I clutched the locked into my hand and pulled him over me gently and began showing him what he meant to me. Kiss after kiss, and caress after caress, I did what I could to show him with my body that I felt the same way. I was breathless after such a display with him, but I refused to stop. At one point, Edward, had taken the locket from me and placed it around my neck. The most amazing part was that he had been making love to me at the time and didn't even stop to focus, he did it while moving in and out of my body with his own.

When the locket was in place, he kissed the spot where it lay and then moved his hand down further to my belly. "Everything I have ever wanted, Bella... thing's I had no idea I could ever be apart of, love. You give me everything. Thank you."

My breath caught from the sweet words he whispered to me. Love was not the word I was trying to find, no... love was too small a thing to compare to the way I viewed him. If Edward were to cease from existing, my soul would never recover from that... I would go on for our children, but part of my soul and life would go with him.

**EPOV**

Morning came too quickly. After Bella received her gift last night, I couldn't keep my hands off of her. Just knowing that she was carrying our baby was a huge turn on. The way her skin glowed and her body blushed was the most beautiful thing.

I rolled out of bed gently and kissed her face. She was so exhausted and I didn't want her to wake up and feel like she had to care for anyone. I pulled on my pajama pants and a t-shirt and headed down stairs to start breakfast for everyone.

The second I entered the kitchen, I found Charlie sitting at the counter with his head in his hands. I made enough noise so that he would know someone has just come in. When he registered my presence, he was off his stool and walking toward me. His posture was repentent and his face was a mirror of pain and embarassment. "Edward, I just... I am so sorry about last night."

I took a deep breath and nodded my head to acknowledge his words. I was still angry, but I could be a bigger person. I went to the coffee pot and started a fresh batch for all of us, well... just for Charlie and I, Bella, would not be able to drink coffee anymore. I smiled at the knowledge of why and the peace of my family washed over me. I had no reason to hold a grudge with Charlie, my life was blessed and the fact that he owned up to his mishap was good enough for me. However, I wanted to make sure he knew what Bella meant to me.

I turned after starting the brew button and leaned against the counter to face him. "Charlie... Bella is my entire life." He just nodded but I don't think he really understood what I meant, so I pushed on. "The way I love her is pure... it's pure Charlie. She gave me my children... I... I could never be anything but loving to that woman. She is my entire world."

Charlie dropped his head and nodded his understanding. "I can see that... hell, just the way you two look at eachother is enough to make people blush." he mummbled. I laughed at that truth in that statement, and I didn't care that he was right. I would never water down the way she made me feel... not for anyone.

I watched the chief take a deep breath and he continued on. "I guess that with everything that has been going on lately... Renee... the detective... it all just caught up to me." I nodded my understanding and felt bad for not having been more patient last night and just explained myself to him instead of getting defensive. I was pulled from that thought though, because he brought up an unwanted name.

"When I saw Bella get upset about that Tanya girl, I immediately thougth the worst." I stiffened at the mention of her name, but Charlie pushed on to explain himself better. "I know I haven't been around, Edward. You're right about that... but now that I'm here, I just feel like I have to be more than just present. Maybe it's the old fatherly habits kicking in... im not sure what it is, but I missed so much... I... It was wrong of me to jump to that conclusion, you're a better man than I was … than I am."

I was about to stop him and tell him that wasn't true, but he held his hand up as if asking me not to. "I don't run from guilt, and I don't dodge my faults... let me own this one." I was speechless as I watched the emotion run across his face. Just then, Ethan ran into the kitchen and wrapped his arm around my leg and gave a tired good morning greeting.

I watched Charlie's face relax as he watched me pick up my son and hg him tightly. I hated to let things end like that, but I also knew well enough that Charlie wanted it that way. As a man, I could respect that.

I got to making breakfast not long after that conversation, and before long french toast and bacon with sausage adorned our breakfast table. Emma hopped down the stairs in her yellow duckie robe and plopped her head full of curls in her regular seat. She looked so sad... or stressed... was it worried. Instantly I figured it was because of the baby, but before I could think too much on it, she asked a burning question. "Where's mommy?"

Charlie turned to me with a curious expression as well as Ethan. I was worried for a second that Bella's big plan to tell Charlie about the baby later would be ruined, but when I looked at Ethan and Emma, they both stole a glance at Charlie and Emma looked to Ethan and shook her head with a slight to signal not to say anything. What amazed me is that Ethan just nodded and focused on his breakfast. I had to close my mouth before Charlie noticed it hanging open, and answered honestly.

"Mommy is real tired, guy's... and gal" I winked at Emma and she giggled into her fork. Charlie just sipped his coffee and continued to look deep in thought. I hadn't thought about how he would take my response, for all he knew, Bella was too angry to sit at the table with him. I turned to him and quietly reassured him. "She really is quite tired, Charlie... that's all." He nodded and went back to his own world.

Ethan and Emma talked amongst each other and I focused on just enjoying our easy morning. About ten minutes into our breakfast, the house phone rang with a specific tone. It was my parents, they had just hit their code to enter the gates. I smiled at the thought that Bella would come down stairs and be happy that she had reinforecments this morning.

A few minutes later, my mom and dad popped into the dining room with muffins and danish for everyone. Bella and I learned early on in our marriage that there was no such thing as too much food. We always made enough incase people popped in, and today was no exception. A few minutes after my mom and dad arrived, Alice and Jasper popped in. We were all seated at the table and talking amongst each other. Even Charlie was having a deep conversation with Carlisle.

I felt a kiss on my cheek and it set my body on a slow burn, my love was awake. I smiled and turned to greet her fully and when our lips met, my life was in sync again. Bella was showered and dressed for the day and sitting next to me now in her seat. I picked up her empty plate and began filling it with her breakfast and before she could protest, I sat it in front of her and rubbed her back gently. God, I loved her.

Bella turned and smiled at me with loving eyes, and I knew what was going through her head. She was making fun of me because I was pampering my pregnant wife. I smiled right back at her because it would only our little secret. A head of curls popped into my line of sight and then I watched Emma hug Bella and tell her she loved her. I smiled wider as I realized that it would _our_ little secret... our family's alone.

I was popped from that bubble by Alice's hand placing a mug full of coffee in front of Bella. "Here ya go... I imagine you'll need that caffeine jolt to get you going."

Bella looked like a deer in the headlights but she quickly recovered. "Um... no thanks Ali. I think im just gonna have some juice this morning." Alice looked at her like she was unconvinced, and in true Alice form, she proceeded to push her.

"What do you think juice is going to do for you?" she chuckled. I was about to butt in, but Bella just smiled and held my hand under the table. Just before she could get the words out to Alice, my father chimed in.

"Alice... just because you run off the evil empire of caffeine doesn't mean you can push your habit on people." It was all said in fun and Alice laughed and rolled her eyes at my dad. I however gave him a greatful smile and so did Bella. I was on my feet instantly and getting her a glass of juice.

When I returned to the table, I found my love digging into her breakfast and smiling at the first bite. I placed her juice in front of her and kissed her hair and took my seat. We all went back to our conversations and I continued to rub loving patterns down Bella's back. Before the end of breakfast, I had moved my seat over so far, that I was no longer at the head of the table. I was now side by side with Bella and her head was resting on my shoulder as I jumped from conversation to conversation.

Alice made a comment about having a goodbye dinner for Charlie tomorrow and Jasper jumped in with an offer to supply the alcohol. Alice rolled her eyes and my mother reminded him that she usually only drank wine.

"Of course i'll bring wine... there will be plenty for all the lovely women at the table to have." Alice smiled and kissed Jaspers cheek and I said the stupidest thing I could have said at that moment.

"Well all the lovely women except for Bella of course." I drank a sip of coffee and when I placed my mug down, everyone was looking at me... especially Charlie.

It was in that moment that I realized what I had just said. Oh dear lord... why did it have to be me? I looked over and saw Ethan shaking his head and grinning. I was for the first time being made fun of by my four year old. I slowly turned my head to face Bella, and instead of anger, I saw a smile. She was giggling at what I could only assume was my expression, and as if right on queue, my mother jumped in.

"What do you mean. 'Everyone except, Bella'?" I knew my mouth was hanging open and for the high priced education I recived at Dartmouth, I couldn't find a single word to spit out. Bella was outright laughing now and my dad joined her. I watched my mother turn to my dad and give him a "you better explain" look.

I felt Bella take my hand and wrap her free arm around my cetner and then she broke the news proudly. "Edward and I are having a baby... I'm pregnant" I felt the relief wash over me as the words were said, and instead of acknoweldging the hoots and claps coming from around us, I took Bella into my arms and kissed her long and hard. When we broke apart I whispered my apology to her.

"I'm so sorry, love... I know you wanted to do this differently... I can't believe it was me that spilled the beans." Bella was shaking her head with a smile and kissed my nose.

"I think that was better" she whispered back to me. I kissed her slowly this time and when we pulled away I felt Ethan tugging on my arms to let her go. Everyone was cracking up now at the scowl Ethan was wearing. He looked like I stole his favorite toy.

"Do you have to do that now?" he fussedo out. I laughed harder and raised my hands up as if in surrender.

"I was just telling mommy that I was sorry for spoiling the secret." Ethan's face became one of understanding and he looked at me seriously and said, "Well Im just glad it was you and not me... I really thought it was going to be me." I gave Ethan a bug hug and over all the laughter, I heard Charlie's the loudest. I turned to see him with a bright smile and watery eyes. I realized then that this _was _better... he felt included. I turned to Bella and she was smiling at Charlie in return. I didn't need to tell her my realiztion, she realized it too.

**AN: So I didn't forget about the story. However, I received a really mean review from someone and it kinda threw me. It wasn't a typical review, I honestly don't mind getting input to what you like or hate, but this one was just mean. I wrote and rewrote this chapter many times, and in all honesty, I have no clue if you will love or hate it, but I had to start again somewhere. I promise to resolve Bella and Renee the next chapter and if you would like the story to end there, then it will. If you want it to go on, I can do that, just let me know what you think. Thank you for those who always have a kind word. I'm sorry you had to wait so long for the next chapter, but I am already writing the next and it will be done VERY soon!**

**-cc**


	43. Closure

**I have one last chapter to write... it will be small, but that will end the story. Enjoy.**

**on a side note... I am continuing these characters after this final chapter. I don't have a title yet, but I will have one soon. Just add me to the author alert so you get it if you are interested.**

**Thanks for reading!**

* * *

EPOV

It had been eight weeks since Charlie had left our home. It happened in an easy manner, no big productions or promises for things that may not come. Instead, my entire family watched from the front stoop as Bella hugged her father goodbye and thanked him for coming. When she had said her peace, she came back to our side and stood watching as he got in and prepared to drive away. As I had held Bella to my side that day, I watched Charlie watching us through the side mirror. He looked at peace... as if the vision of Bella with us all beside her was what he knew was right. It was.

The night before he left, Charlie and I found a moment to ourselves as we prepared the grill for the food Bella was fixing with my mom. I had been so engulfed in the spilling of the baby beans that I hadn't gotten a chance to really talk with Charlie at all. But when I was scrubbing the grill, he started with what I knew he was dieing to say. "Edward... I just wanted to apologize again for the way I acted last night. I feel like the worlds biggest jack ass now that I know Bella is pregnant. No wonder you were so adamant about her eating... I just... I didn't.." I felt bad for his obvious discomfort, but I knew he needed to get this out.

"Charlie, please don't worry about it... I know you didn't know. I understand." I patted his back and did my best to give him a reassuring smile. I was not expecting his reaction though. His face was on the verge of a breakdown and I heard him taking what were supposed to be calming breaths, but it came out sounding more like a toddler getting ready to whale. I had no idea what to do, more over, I didn't understand why.

"Charlie?" I questioned him carefully. He was shaking his head as if unable to go on as of yet, but a moment later he was able to speak.

"I missed it all." he stated simply. I understood what he meant then... he _had_ missed it all. Birthdays, graduations, boyfriends... he missed opportunities to give her any help she may have needed while she was growing up, and also later as an adult. Who helped her move? Pay bills, if she didn't have the money? The answer to those questions were obvious though, no one was there to help her. Bella was alone and despite the pitty party she could have had for herself, she prevailed and succeeded. All the same though, I imagine these were the things he was tortured with. As a father, I could understand his guilt. Just the thought of Emma or Ethan struggling and needing help made me want to pull my hair out. I didn't comment on it again and neither did he. There just wasn't anything left to say about it. Nothing was ever going to make the past better and no amount of harping on it would fix anything. So instead of going on and on, he just enjoyed the time that he had left with us here in Chicago, and when he left the next day, Bella had her closure from Charlie.

* * *

Tonight I was planning on thoroughly enjoying Bella and her pregnancy hormones. The last two days had been so hectic that she was out like a light every time I was anxious to have her. I would never dream of waking her while she was pregnant and tired, so I did what I could to relieve myself the past couple nights. I hated having to rub myself into relief, I much rather prefered Bella's soft body as opposed to self love. I wish I could say that I was able to just smile and rest along side her, but the truth was that we had been going at it so much lately that I was down right spoiled. My body didn't know how to just turn off my need for her.

Tonight was different though, I had gotten the kids in bed early, helped Bella settle things down stairs and headed up to our master bedroom to await Bella. She was finishing a spread sheet for her charity and would be joining me any minute. I was in only my boxers and crawled into the sheets, closed my eyes and waited.

I had woken up to an empty bed. It was much later than it had been when I initially came in the room, and the light I had left on was off. All that lit the room was the moon light and a faint glow from under the bathroom door. I cursed myself for having fallen asleep and got up to look for my love, I didn't know I would find her in the bathroom naked and looking at her silouette in the oversized mirror that adorned her vanity. I knew she could see me in the reflection, but that didn't stop her from doing what she was doing. So instead of going to her, I watched from the doorway with a smile. When she was satisfied with the examination of her new form, she turned to me with a gentle longing. "Can you tell yet?"

I went to her then and took her into my arms as delicately as I could muster in that moment and kissed her good and hard. Not long after that, my boxers were discarded and I was carrying her back to our bed with only the dark colored sky to show me the way. I settled us onto the mattress and flipped us so that, Bella, was hovering over my needy, anxious body.

I was too anxious to be as gentle as I would need to be if I were the one in her current position."Come here, baby..." I gently kissed along her jaw to the soft spot behind her ear. I could hear her soft moans in my ears as I caressed her arms, back and stomach. I would never get enough of her beneath my fingers. The need for her was something I never searched for, it was always there... always ready to shower her at any available chance how much she meant to me.

I took my time getting to know each new curve of her body and burned them into my memory. I caressed the growing bump that was now visible when she was naked and dropped kiss upon kiss to the swollen breasts I had grown fond of over the last few weeks. I let myself soak up this beautiful woman and appreciate the fact that she was mine. Bella, alone was a work of art. But, Bella, pregnant was _my _work of art. "How did I get so lucky?" I asked her in between kisses. I felt her hands caressing my cheeks tenderly and then her words were upon me.

"Two lonely people made it out to dinner with a friend one night... and the rest is history" My emotions hit me at the truth in her words. I was so lonely before, Bella... I was emotionally detached and had only my work to keep me company. Before, Bella, I truly had nothing. I had an empty home, heart and soul, but in the course of a three hour dinner, I had found my other half, my soul mate. Seeing it now, painted in the way she just explained, it was all so easy. She had been lonely too, she had been for years. I felt the sting in my eyes that always accompanied my thoughts about, Bella, alone and tucked away in her home by herself before I had known she even exhisted. I at least had my family to turn to, but before, Alice... Bella, had no one. "Why couldn't I have found you sooner, love?" I heard my voice shake in my own ears. I had asked myself that question many times over in the years we had been married, even when we were just dating. How badly I wished I had gone off to Yale like my father had wanted me to... I would have found her. I know without a doubt I would have been just as taken with her then as I was now, and I would not have been able to wait even twenty four hours before I would have called to ask her out.

As always, she just smiled to me and ran her fingers through my hair. Bella never gave me an answer to that question. Maybe she didn't have one, but I honestly think that the words she never spoke were a mirror of what I felt. We were meant to be together, and had I found her before,Alice, then I would have no doubt made her mine all those years ago. I felt Bella's lips graze gently over my own and before I could secure mine to hers for a kiss, she whispered against my mouth, " Were here now... I love you... and you love me." I nodded and moved back the hair from her face gently.

"and were having a baby... our third baby..." Bella's face brightened at the mention of that. She seemed to rather enjoy those words, and before I could keep going , she silenced me with a kiss and this time we didn't stop.

When morning came, we had a lot to do. Ethan was in his first year of tee-ball and he had a game this morning. We had been quite busy with the weekends lately, since both Ethan and Emma were enrolled in a slew of sports at the local YMCA. Each weekend we loaded up Bella's X5 and headed off to whatever field was scheduled for the day. I laughed the first weekend we had actually made it out of the house and out to the game, because when we were all settled and on the bleacher cheering on our star player #8, it hit me that this was my life.

The same thing came to mind this weekend as I watched proudly from the stands as my son prepared to bat next. I had the wife, the kids and the only thing missing from this little picture was a dog. I was a rising surgeon and I gave my family a comfortable life. I remembered back to what my dad has said about me having it all, and looking around me and down to the woman I was holding in my arms along with the little girl cuddled to my side, I could finally understand the beauty of that statement.

I felt Bella sit up from my arms and it pulled me from my day dreaming. Ethan was up to bat and I would be lying if I said he didn't look like the cutest thing out there. I chuckled as he eyed the tee with determination. Bella gigged and clasped her hands together tightly in angst of his swing. We watched him take a deep breath and then swing as hard as he could and he hit the ball past the in- field. I jumped up and cheered like the proud dad I was and when I heard a competing yell I turned quickly to see my dad doing the same at the bottom of the stands. I focused back on my son as he rounded the bases and then laughed heartily at the sight of all the kids running toward the ball all together. Tee ball was quite possibly the best thing I had ever seen in my life.

When Ethan was safely on third I looked back to where my dad had been standing and noticed my mom pulling him up the bleachers with a scowl. I heard her harumphing about how he was lucky they didn't miss that and how next time he had be ready to leave when she tells him to. I chuckled as I watched them make their way next to us and greeted them with a big smile.

"Hey! Glad you guys made it!" I exclaimed. Bella was about to get up and give hugs, but both my mom and dad stopped her and went to her instead. I smiled wider as they each rubbed the baby in her belly and kissed her cheek.

My mom came and grabbed Emma into a big hug and then proceeded to pull out sweets for her to enjoy the game with. I just rolled my eyes and let Emma have em'. She was so laid back that it didn't matter to me. Emma gave me a nervouse look and I just winked to her and stole a piece of licorice. The smile that lit up her face was enough to make me want to give her candy before lunch every day.

We all watched together and cheered for The E man throughout the entire game. Bella and I got a kick out of Ethan's coach. That man was the size of a body builder and to the naked eye he looked like the kind of guy who would be a bully, but he was the exact opposite. In fact, he was in himself a child but all the same, he was fantastic with the kids. He truly enjoyed coaching and teaching them, and it showed in the way he treated them always.

When the game was over and the kids has lined up to get their snacks, I helped Bella down the bleachers and went to get Ethan from his team. When I made my way over to the dugout, I overheard Coach Emmett talking to Ethan. He was praising him about what a great hit he had and how he was gonna be amazing when he got older. Ethan was all smiles which in turn made me all smiles. What parent doesn't love hearing about how great their kid is?

"Hey coach, great game!" I offered him. Emmette looked as if he had won the world series when I said that and it made me grateful that Ethan was so lucky to have such a decent person for a coach. I wasn't much of a ball player, but get me in the water and I was trouble! However, Ethan had no desire to swim and I was no Babe Ruth.

"Thank's ! Your little guy here is a natural, "

"Please... call me, Edward." We both went back and forth talking about the game and then about diffent leagues he coached year round. He wanted Ethan on his year round team and I told him we would think about it and get back to him. The conversation was easy going and comfortable, but it took a turn for ugly when Emmett introduced his wife.

Rosalie De Grau. Well Rosalie McCarty now. I had know Rosalie for many years, I wouldn't say she was a close friend, but she was a good person. I had met her through Tanya many years back now and the last time I had actually seen her was just before Tanya moved out and back with her sister. I had no idea if the two were still close, but I didn't want to take the chance she would say something or be rude to Bella. I looked back over my shoulder and saw my love walking to me with a Emma and my parents along side her. She was smiling _my _smile and I became a nervouse wreck. I wasn't sure what to do, but Rosalie went ahead and started.

"Actually, Em, I know Edward already." I felt Bella next to me and then her head rested along my arm gently. I looked down to see her staring back at me with love. I looked back to Emmett and Rosalie to gauge what was about to happen. Instead of the worst, I was pleased to see Rosalie was being extremly courteous and welcoming. She gave me a soft smile and then a bright one to Bella.

"Oh!...How?" Emmett asked. Well here goes my own personal hell again.

"Edward and I have a few mutual friends in common... or we did at least." I wasn't sure why I was so nervous, but I guess it was just because the subject of Tanya was a sore one. I imagine Rose had heard all about the twisted tale, at least Tanya's version, and I had no idea what she was thinking. Luckily though, she was being an adult about it. A gracious one at that.

"It's been a long time Rose. I'm glad to see your doing well." I offered. She smiled brighter as she hugged Emmett's arm and then out of no where a miniature Emmett came running over with his snack.

"Mom! Can we go get some pizza?" he was a live wire, but not in a bad way. I heard a gasp next to me and saw Emma hiding behind my leg. I knealed down to see if she was okay, but she slid from behind me to Bella and was pulling on her arm. I watched Bella and her exchange secrets and when Bella was standing up again she had a grin on her face.

"What's going on?" I asked. I had no clue what the hell had just happened, but something did. Bella just shook her head to say nothing and went back to focusing on Rose and Emmett. I felt like an ass for having not introduced her yet.

"Oh! Sorry! This is my wife, Bella and our daughter Emma. You already know Ethan I imagine..." I kissed, Bella's temple and rubbed our baby bump gently and continued. "and this is the newest edition to our family." I looked down to my love and saw her smiling warmly and rubbing her small bump as well. Rose was all smiles as she took in Bella's appearance. Bella extended her hand to shake Emmetts and then Rose's but I was pleasantly surprised when Rosalie gave her a warm hug instead.

"It's good to meet you, Bella. Congratulations." she said warmly. I felt myself relax completely and just like that the tension was gone.

BPOV

I wasn't sure why, but I had a feeling that there was more to Rose and Edward than they had just let on. Not that it mattered, if there was more to it. That was long before he and I had been together. I just thought it was kind of funny that he would be nervouse to say it. But then again, Emmett wasn't a small man... I mean he didn't look like he _couldn't _fight.

After introductions, Rosalie huddled closer and said, "Emma is in Mrs. Jensen's class isn't she?" I was surprised she knew that. I nodded my head dumbly and looked at her with a "how did you know" look. Rosalie grinned and leaned into tell me quietly, "My son, Logan is in love with her."

Well what a small world. I giggled and nodded my confirmation as it all clicked. Logan was theirs and Emma was in love with him too. We both went back and forth about the school and the teachers we liked and some we weren't too keen on and I found that I actually rather liked Rosalie... or Rose as she asked me to call her.

It was the kids and the grandparents that pulled us four away from our conversations, but we knew we would see each other again next weekend, so we all headed our seperate ways to appease the children... and again, the grandparents.

When Edward and I had the kids in the car and were all buckled in, I went in for the kill. "So is Rosalie an ex or something?" Edward stiffened and looked at me panicked. I laughed a little so he could see it was okay if she was, but he never relaxed. I got nervous then, and all the worst imaginings came flooding my head. "Edward, what is it?" He took a deep breath and stared out the window. Emma and Ethan were watching the dvd playing with head phones on and couldn't hear a thing. After what felt like the longest pause, he answered me.

"Rosalie was a friend of Tanya's" Oh. Yeah, that was different. I wasn't sure how to feel about that, I liked Rose... she was nice to me and our kids were friends. I didn't want to _not_ like her. I felt Edward grab my hand and rub my knuckles gently.

"Love, are you okay?" I was fine, but I didn't know if I should feel that way or not. I just nodded my head and said the only thing that mattered to me about wether Rosalie and Tanya were friends.

"Do you think she'll tell her about us? I mean about where we live and the kids..." Before I could say the rest, Edward was out of the car and jogging toward what I could only assume was Rosalie and Emmett. I watched from my seat as he calmly talked to both of them and then Rosalie's surprised expression and ernst nodding as well as Emmett's. After a few minutes Edward hugged Rose and shook Emmett's hand and made his way back to us. I was dieing to know what he just said when he slid into his seat, but before I could ask he pulled me to his lips and kissed me hard. When he pulled away he told me what I wanted to know.

"Rose, said that she doesn't talk to Tanya anymore. She said that she had a falling out with her shortly after she and I had began dating and that as far as she was concerned, Tanya was all but a forgotten part of her past." I nodded my understanding and he kissed me again.

"I told them about what she did to you... I actually started with that and then that is when Rose told me she wasn't in contact anymore. They both understand why we were nervouse." I was nodding my understanding again and took a deep breath and giggled.

"Well what a Saturday, huh?" I winked at Edward and he smiled brightly and winked at me. That was done and dealt with so we were off to enjoy a nice lunch with the rest of the family.

When we got to the Deli, Jasper and Alice were sitting at a large table waiting for us. Mom and Dad must have told them we were coming here and I was glad because they had missed the game. I waved big when we entered the parlor and Alice and Jas waved us over with big grins.

Ethan being himself ran over and animatedly explained every hit they missed. Jas was a huge baseball fan and I could tell he was sorry he didn't make it. When Ethan had a ream of quarters in his hand and Emma was along side him, they went to the game machines that were right next to the table and started playing away.

"So now that we can talk about adult stuff!" I joked. I was expecting everyone to get going with their own conversations, but they didn't. I looked at Edward and he was just as confused and shrugged his shoulders. I looked back to Jasper and Ali then to Carlisle and Esme and they were all looking rather nervous.

"What is it?" I knew whatever it was, that it wasn't good, but that didn't mean that I didn't want to know. I felt Edward scoot closer and turn his body so I could settle between him on the bench.

"Guy's?" he mirrored. Carlisle was the one to break the silence.

"We finally got word from, Renee." he said. I felt chills go down my back, but I nodded for him to continue. Instead of doing that, he looked to Jasper to continue on.

"I was ironing out some details this morning after I spoke with her. That's why I didn't make the game... anywho, I drew up some contracts..." he took a deep breath and his brows were knit together as if he was frustrated. I could see it was because he wasn't getting the words out the way he wanted to and it was making him flustered.

"Just tell me, Jasper... it's okay." I hated the unease, Renee was causing at this moment, but I knew that had I not been so determined to have my final say, then this wouldn't be an issue. Alice rubbed his arm and it encouraged him to go on.

"She want's money, Bella..." he huffed a breath frustrated and rolled his eyes at the situation but kept on. "You knew that already... I think we all did."

I released a deep breath and nodded along and felt Edward caressing my arms and hugging me to him.

"I think the easiest thing to do here, Bella, is to just give her something and send her along. Otherwise, who knows how long she'll make appearances." Carlise jumped in and tried to reason.

I was already shaking my head no, I didn't want to do that. It wasn't so much the money, it was the principal of the matter. I wasn't an ATM or a Credit Union, I had no desire to be a tool nor have my family become one either. Carlise was about to try and reason more, but I wasn't having it.

"No." I stated simply. I sat up, squared my shoulders and shook my head no to all of them. I was calm and respectful, but I needed to get my point across. "It's not about the money... it has nothing to do with that. The honest truth is that if she really needed it, I _would _give it to her. I would go to the bank, make a withdrawl and hand it to her with a smile. I would do that, because I _can_ do that. I am able to do it because I have worked hard and so has my husband." I felt Edward drop his head to my back and squeeze me tightly for a moment and whisper a thank you. I knew it was because he appreciated the fact that I acknowledged that what we had was mine as well. "But I won't do it, because she doesn't appreciate the fact that I can... she never will. I realized that the moment I accepted that she would never see me doing well at Yale as a good thing."

I looked into Carlisle's eyes and he smiled gently and nodded. He understood I wasn't interested in "the easy way" and from the looks of everyone else at the table, so did they.

* * *

So here I was, sitting in an airport cafe waiting for the woman who brought me in this world to show up, so I could kick her out of my life for good.

It had been two weeks since Jasper had spoken with her, and in that time, I had decided on how I wanted things to play out. I would come today, listen to her request and calmly ask her to disappear. I sat silently watching the steam rise from my cup of tea as I waited for Renee. I was surprisinlgy calm despite what I was about to do. It was my crazy gift... the ability to not feel at an instant. I saw it as more of a curse on most occasions, but today, right now, I was grateful for my unusual tick. I was about to color code the sugar in the holder to my right, but I was startled by a hand on my shoulder.

"Isabella" my mother said calmly. I wasn't sure what to do or say, so I merely nodded a hello to her and watched her sit across from me. I didn't have words anymore, I guess I never really did if I was honest with myself. I had been the one to ask Jasper to track her down and I had been the one that needed the closure. I just hoped I had it in me to get.

I took a sip of my tea to try and calm my nerves, but after a long silence and three sips later, I was still a ball of nerves. Renee, seemed to be just as bad. She didn't meet my eyes the entire time she sat across from me, and instead she fiddled with the silverware off to her right. I decided that since I had been the one to call her here, I should start.

"Thank you for coming, it means a lot to me." I said. Renee met my eyes for the first time and her mouth was open a little. It was as if she didn't expect me to be corteous. I understood that, I had been rather rude to her when I saw her last, and for whatever reason, I felt the need to explain myself.

"I know that when we spoke last it wasn't pleasant... I'm sorry about that. It wasn't my intention for things to be that way. I guess the shock of your appearance was just more than I could bare at the time." I was being completely honest. I was better than the behavior she saw me act with, and if this were to be the last moment I ever saw my mother, I wanted her to remember that despite the horrible situation, I had class.

The reality of this being the last time I would ever see my mother, shockingly overwhelmed me. I didn't understand the feelings that flooded me, but I didn't fight them either. My eye's were stinging with tears and I couldn't get control of them fast enough, and soon they were spilling over my eyes. Renee chose to speak up then.

"I..." I heard her choke out. I looked up through tear filled eyes and saw a reflection that mirrored my own. Amazingly she was crying too. I had no idea what was happening, but I knew that I would remember this conversation for the rest of my life.

"Bella, I..." she shook her head gently and pushed on. "I'm not real sure what to say right now. I know there isn't much that I can say... you don't trust me... you have no reason to." her voice quivered and I noticed we had the same anxious habit of biting our lips. I smiled gently at the sight that despite our emotional make up, we were similar in some small way.

I still didn't have words, but I nodded my head and took a deep breath and started over. "I don't really have a lot to say... I'm not even real sure why I set this up in the first place, I just..." I searched for the words that would make my being here right now make sense. Renee held back a sob and nodded her head and finished the sentence for me.

"You just wanted to say goodbye the right way" tears fell freely now from her face as they did mine.

That was it, that was the reason I had set this entire thing up. I knew I didn't owe it to her, _she_ knew I didn't owe it to her, but all the same, she was my _mother_, and I wouldn't have been alive right now had she chose not to keep me. Despite the horrible parenting she had done, I was alive, and happily married. It wasn't much of a life when I was younger, but I lived. Before I could say anything, Renee beat me to the punch.

"I don't know why I do the thing's I do, Bella... I have no answers... no excuses. You're entitled to your anger, it's your's and rightfully so."

I pulled myself together for a moment and said what I could in response to that. "I don't want to be angry anymore... that burden is so heavy, and i'm tired, mom. I'm really, really tired." I barely got the last part out before I sobbed out my pain. I didn't want to feel the weight on me anymore... I had a husband who loved me, children I adored, and parents in both Carlisle and Esme. I had no reason to feel the pain anymore. All these years it felt as if I were being dragged by the bumber of a car I was holding on to. Today I came to let go, because it hurt too much to keep holding on. I needed to let go.

I watched Renee compose herself and dry her eyes with a napkin, as soon as she took a deep breath, she began again.

"I never wanted to be this woman in front of you..." she said gently. I had no idea what she meant by that and I guess she read it across my face.

"This woman, Bella... the one who spent her entire adult life jealous of a life she created. The one who decided to become addicted to a stupid white powder... the woman who promised herself years ago that no matter what, she wouldn't seek out her daughter that managed to get out of the one way road she set her on..."

I didn't know what to say to that confession. It made me sad to think that this is who she was... is. I watched the face of Renee... of my mother, and for the first time, I didn't have any negetive feelings for her. It was just sad. I took a deep breath, and when I did, Renee started again, but this time, her voice was barely above a whisper.

"I knew what I was doing... when I told you you wouldn't make it Yale." Her face contorted in pain again as she said it, but she moved on. "You were always so stubborn, Bella... just like your father." She smiled as she said it and so did I, but I still didn't know where she was going.

"You've been this way since you were a child, Bella. Anytime anyone ever told you that you couldn't do something, you set out to prove them wrong... and you _always_ did."

I gasped as I made the connection, Renee saw I had made it and kept pushing on.

"I was getting real bad by then, baby... real bad." she wiped at her eyes and continued. "I knew you were always the responsible one... the one who mothered instead of being mothered... you would of never left. I was jealous that I never had your drive, but if making you hate me got you out of that rat hole, then I don't regret it." she sobbed harder this time and grabbed my hand that was laying on the table.

I cried along with her and held her hand as well. I didn't have the strength to stand, I was far too overwhelmed for that. I worried briefly about getting home at this rate, but that thought was gone as soon as it entered my mind.

It all made sense now. I had my answers and I could walk away from this in peace. I saw, Renee, differently now. Not completely, but I didn't feel the hate. She didn't say anything else and neither did I, instead we sat quietly trying to compose ourselves and when several minutes passed, I said the only thing that mattered anymore.

"If you had to lie to me so that I could get here, then... thank you." I said it with as much conviction as I could muster. Renee smiled a real smile and took a deep breath.

"You look real good, Bella... and you've done a wonderful job making a life for your self." and with that, I was able to walk away from this with peace. I was about to say those very words aloud, but Renee asked me something and it took me back a little.

"I know I have no right to ask, but can you do me a favor?" I felt my chest go cold as I waited for her to diminish what little peace I just found. I didn't answer her, but she asked it anyway.

"I just ask that no matter what ends up happening... no matter what you end up doing. Just... be spectacular."

Relief flooded me faster than the cold had. I nodded my agreement and we shared one last moment of silence before I stood to leave. I knew that if I stayed longer that things could go a different way, and I didn't want that. I wanted to remember, Renee exactly this way, no more and no less. I think she realized it, and for what it's worth, I think she was relieved. Renee stood with me and I placed some cash on the table to settle my bill. I grabbed my purse and retrieved a white envelope that I had placed in there this morning when I decided on what I wanted to say. It was just an Easter card with a picture of myself, Edward and the kids inside of it... there was also a check for a thousand dollars as well. I was torn on wether to still give it to her, I didn't want to insult her, but I figured that either way she may need it, so I went ahead and handed it to her. She looked to me and then down at the card without a word, but the question was clear in her eyes.

"It's an, Easter card... and a picture of my family." She nodded and took the envelope with a smile and tucked it away in her bag. We stood staring at each other awkwardly for a moment and then without another word, she pulled me into a hug. She froze when she felt my stomach push up against her, no doubt realizing I was pregnant. She pulled back with a smile and rubbed my stomach and tears filled her eyes again.

"Goodbye, Isabella." Her hand was resting on my stomach as she said it, and I whispered a strangled goodbye as well. There was simply nothing left to say, and with that I turned and made my way out of the cafe with the words she had spoken just moments before echoing through my head.

When I reached the exit I was met with a familiar smile and a loving embrace. Edward was standing just outside the doors leaning against the wall waiting for me. I hugged him with everything I had in me and when he asked me how I was doing, I responded with the only answer I felt appropriate.

"I'm spectacular..."


	44. In My Place The Final Chapter

_**Thank you for everyone who has read and loved this story. I want to apologize for making you wait so long, it's just that I love this story more than any of the other stories I have written (or am currently writing) and I had no idea how I wanted this to end. This was my first... my baby. Thank you for reading it when you had so many other amazing choices to go with. Lastly... if you reviewed and loved this story... please know I always took into consideration the input you bestowed upon me.**_

_**Thank you from the bottom of my heart. CC**_

_**ps: here is the house http:/www(dot)marthas-vineyard-real-estate(dot)com/propertydetail(dot)php?id=154#**_

* * *

**BPOV**

I had a strong feeling about the baby sleeping in my arms. I had a feeling he was going to be the one to give Edward and I a run for our money.

Connor was only six months old, but he was a world more demanding than either Ethan or Emma ever were. Edward and I were constantly in a fit of laughter over the facial expressions we would receive from our little one when he was either tired or hungry.

"Mom, can we go now?" I cringed as Ethan's voice came through the room with a loud and irritated tone. I sneaked a peak at Connor and found him still sleeping but wearing a frown. I kissed his little head gently before turning to Ethan and giving him my "mom stare".

"Ethan, go and wait out in the living room! I will be down in just a moment." My words were low and soft but from the look on his face, he knew he messed up with that little stunt. While Ethan retreated, I got up from the rocking chair and grabbed the diaper bag from the corner.

We were going to the park, because in just six short hours we would all be on a plane to Cape Cod Massachusetts. After we arrived there, we would be loading Edwards recent purchase of a small plane and flying into Martha's Vineyard. So yes... we were going to the park in hope of exhausting Ethan to no end so that the flight to Massachusetts wasn't as painful as the flight to Seattle had been two months ago when we all went to visit Charlie for a long weekend.

As I entered the living room, I found both Emma and Ethan sitting on the couch waiting for me. Emma was reading her book while Ethan who being true to himself, had managed to find not just one...but all of his action toys that had been packed away neatly into our luggage. I felt my nerves flare up at the thought that he had more than likely destroyed the hard work I had done to reach them, but instead of yelling like I wanted to, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before speaking.

"Ethan... why did you go through the bags that I specifically told you not to touch? Those bags are for our trip, and I spent a great deal of time getting everything together so that no one would forget anything." I went ahead an opened my eyes to see what he had to say for himself, but before he could answer, Emma spoke up.

"I fixed it all momma... I folded everything and put it back the way you had it. Don't be mad, okay?" I felt tears prickling in my eyes at her words. Because they hurt me more than anything I had faced ever had. Emma had done something that I would have... or better yet _had _done when I was her age. My youth was spent cleaning up after other people's messes in hopes of making things pretty again. I was always the responsible one... I had to be. I realized then that being upset over that had been ridiculous... it was just a bag and it didn't _have _to be the immaculate masterpiece I had made it out to be. It was a _bag_ with clothes that would be washed and pressed later. I was being ridiculous.

I went to the corner and placed Connor in his swing before going to my little girl and giving her a big hug and kiss. She was so much like me... it scared me sometimes.

"Sorry momma...I didn't mean to make you cry" Ethan's sad voice came through and I turned just in time to see him drop his head dejectedly as he wringed his little hands nervously. No doubt he was anxious because he felt that his actions had made me cry... and in turn had broken a golden rule that Edward had set out for him when he started school and having play dates. Rule number one was _don't __ever make a girl cry._ Ethan was no doubt giving himself a very hard time about his mistake, and in truth, the sight of his nervous little face was quite saddening.

I sat down in between both Emma and Ethan and pulled them each into a hug silently for a moment, and when I had the words I wanted to say decided, I went ahead and broke the silence.

"What do you both say we all just forget about the last ten minutes and go enjoy the park! Daddy will meet us there and when we come home, we'll eat dinner and head straight to the airport and start our vacation"

Just as I had finished my little speech, the sound faint sound of the garage door closing met my ears.

Edward was home early.

In an instant, Ethan and Emma were off the couch and running through the kitchen in an attempt to get to him before the other could. I sat silently but with happiness coursing through me at the thought that he had come home early... he wanted to be with us at the park.

I saw my green eyed god walk through the garage side door with our own personal miracles in his arms. We watched each other as Ethan hung his head and continued his confession that was given on his own accord.

"...and then momma came down the stairs with brother and saw me playing with my toys that I got from the suitcase she packed and then she cried." I had to stifle a giggle at hearing Ethan's point of view of what happened. I watched Edward kiss his messy copper hair but he wasn't laughing.

"I think maybe your leaving something out, Ethan. What exactly made momma cry?" I just shook my head no to him though, I didn't want the kids to ever know or even have an idea about the kind of childhood I had. They were innocent and loved... the way children were supposed to be. Aside from that, they loved me, and in hearing anything that hurt me, I knew it wold hurt them too. Especially Ethan.

Edward saw my signal to not dig deeper and he obliged and began tickling Ethan and Emma in an attempt to get their minds off of what they had been talking about.

"Alright you two, go get in the car and buckle up so we can go to the park, I'm gonna help momma get Connor together and change, then we'll be on our way."

I got up to greet my husband and together we watched as the kids made their way out to the garage. They were half way out but then Emma spun around and tilted her head to the side and her curls fell along with it.

"What car are we taking?"

"Oh! Um, get in the Range Rover, we'll take that one to the park." Edward answered her.

I chuckled at the hilarity of it all. My life certainly was ideal these days... I may not have had the world growing up, but my husband made sure to give me everything I could ever want and more as an adult. I had a beautiful home, jewelry, clothes, cars, and just recently Edward bought me a house on Martha's Vineyard for our anniversary. But most importantly, he gave me a beautiful family.

Edward pulled me into his arms and kissed gently from my collar bone to my earlobe. "Why were you crying sweetheart?" I was in my happy place now... and I honestly couldn't remember what had set me off... nor did I want to. The past was the past and it was time to move on.

"Who knows, love, I'm still hormonal from that little guy sleeping peacefully over there." I kissed Edwards chest gently before going to pick up my little one who was resting peacefully in his swing. Before I could fully hold him though, Edward had swooped him from arms and was holding him securely to his body with a look of absolute peace.

"I love you, Connor." and with that we made our way to the garage and loaded into the Rover.

* * *

Emma and Ethan were in heaven right now, pure unadulterated heaven. Ethan had found a few friends from school that were at the park today, and Emma... well Emma had found Logan swinging and it just about made her entire year.

Rosalie was here with a few mothers she knew and we chatted a few moments, but for the most part, I spent my time with Edward. His schedule was absolutely demanding these days and these moments were few and far between. So as we watched the kids play at the park, and when he was blowing raspberry's on Connor's stomach, we caught up on each others days and made plans for things to do on the island.

I had only been to Martha's Vineyard once, and it was while we vacationed with Esme and Carlisle. Apparently having a place on the Vineyard was something all the Cullen's felt was necessary, because now that Jasper and Alice were married, they acquired a vacation home there as well. All the same though, I was anxious to get there, relax and eat some wonderful seafood. Aside from the food though, I was anxious for us all to be together and relaxing as a family.

"Mom and Dad offered to keep the kids for us when we wanted sometime for ourselves." I giggled at the tone he used as he said it... because there was only one thing we would be doing if we had any "time for ourselves".

"Well then is sounds like I have a few extra things I need to pack before we leave then..." I teased. However I wasn't expecting him to lean over and whisper, "I wouldn't bother packing anything to wear, love. I plan on enjoying every piece of your skin" he stopped to suck my earlobe gently then continued, "Some parts more thoroughly than others..."

Holly hell, was the park on fire or was it just me? Seriously... was I on fire? Because my skin felt like it was. I turned to Edward and his eyes were mischievous... he knew what his words had done to me, and I had no doubt that he was very pleased with himself for having coaxed that reaction out of me. Before I could give him any type of retort, he was leaning over and whispering into my ear once more. "I love you Bella... and I _miss_ you. I can never get enough..." He kissed my cheek tenderly and stood before handing me Connor.

"It's already four thirty, sweetheart" He glanced at his watch then out to the play ground in search of the kids. "I'm gonna get Emma and Ethan, go ahead and get Connor settled and we'll have an early dinner before we hit the airport."

With a kiss to my lips and one to Connors hair, he was off to round up our kids. I had just placed Connor in the native carrier and secured it to my body and was gathering his blanket and bottle into the diaper bag when someone from behind me gently tried to get my attention.

"Excuse me... um... Bella? Is it?" I turned expecting to see Rosalie or one of the other mothers I had just met, but what I met was something entirely different. It was Tanya.

For a moment all I did was stare with a shocked and lost expression. My jaw may have even been hanging open, but I couldn't be sure. She looked different... but not entirely. Her eyes were still blue... but softer? I glanced down to see a tiny red headed baby sleeping in her arms. I was still taking in that image as she spoke once more.

"Is your name, Bella?" I stayed silent, for I was unable to form a coherent sentence in this moment.

"I'm terribly sorry. You looked like someone... I'm sorry." She had turned to leave then, and instead of letting her, I answered her question from just a moment before.

"I am... I'm Bella." she turned then and a few different emotions flickered across her face. The most prominent though, was shame.

We stood there for a moment in silence as I tried to understand what it was she wanted and she gathered what looked to be courage. I have no idea how much time passed, for all I knew it was only a few seconds, but eventually, she spoke again.

"I don't know if you remember me... I'm..." I stopped her there. "I remember you".

I wasn't sure what my tone sounded like, but I was going for calm. She simply nodded her head and took a breath before continuing.

"I saw you just now and I... well... I knew that I owe you an apology..." She paused only to kiss the small infant in her arms but kept her eyes there as she began again. "I... I know that I don't deserve it, nor do you even care, but... I am so sorry for what I did to you when you were pregnant"

I felt anger course through me at just the memory alone but as I watched her, m anger began to fade. "I can only really understand now just how sick and horrible that was..." She seemed to hold the small red headed baby in her arms closer, but kept going. "I was a different person back then, Bella... I was lost."

She met my eyes then but dropped them to the carrier around my body.

"Congratulations" she said cautiously. "You and Edward, I presume?" There was no poison in her voice, nor was there anything indicating pain. I simply nodded my head but did not speak.

"Two children... wow... congratulations, really."

"Three" I blurted out. I cradled Connor a bit closer as I said it and I was oddly aware of the pride that sounded in my response.

"Three" she echoed back with a smile.

"Well, I'll leave you to your baby, I saw you and... well... I just wanted to apologize. I'm sure this will be the only time I'll ever see you again... were going home tomorrow... so... you don't have to worry about seeing me again."

"Get away from my wife" I flinched at the voice that came up behind me. I turned to see Edward staring daggers at Tanya, and for a moment I was terrified that his anger would cloud his judgement. I turned to him then and placed my hand on his chest.

"Edward... she"

"I said leave!" he cut me off and his voice rose to an octave that caused Connor to jump in my arms. Edward must have felt it, because he took a deep breath, closed his eyes. I took this moment to tell him what happened.

"Baby, she was just apologizing... she wasn't causing any trouble" I whispered tenderly. I knew it wouldn't matter to him, and I was in no way defending her, I was simply telling him the truth.

"Edward" Tanya called out carefully.

I watched as he opened his eyes and how they hardened as he looked at her. That didn't seem to stop her though, because she pushed on.

"I can understand that you hate me and want me nowhere near your family... I respect that. I was just waiting for my husband and I saw Bella... I shouldn't have, but... I have been wanting to apologize to her for a long while now... to both of you."

I saw Edwards jaw clench and his hands ball into fists as he spoke. "Well I don't accept" His words were angry and cold. I watched him take in her appearance and only then did he notice the baby in her arms. Anger really does blind us.

He relaxed, but only minutely. His words were calmer now... but not nicer. "Is that your baby, Tanya?" She nodded her head and smiled proudly at the small bundle she held.

"Then you can understand how I will _never_ forgive you for almost taking something that precious from Bella and I."

Instantly the pain from that horrible day came back to me. We had been so scared... Edward had been a mess and blamed himself. But the culprit was right in front of us now. Now I remembered why his anger _and mine_ was justified.

"I live with that shame ever day of my life, Edward. It's a shame that came to be shortly after I was lucky enough to be blessed with Vanessa." She bit her lip and snuggled the baby closer, but Edward showed absolutely no emotion as she did it. Tanya looked up to see Edward watching her with as much content if not more than he had when he first walked up. She took this moment to make her exit.

"I was real messed up for a long time, Edward. More so than you could possibly even realize. I used you... I lied to you and I will live with that for the rest of my life. You were nothing but good to me, and I didn't deserve you for even a moment. I'm so sorry for having done that to you... to both of you."

Just then Ethan came barreling into Edwards leg and laughing uncontrollably. It broke Edward from his sour mood and me from the nervous wreck I had just been.

"Are we leaving now?" Ethan asked a bit winded and flushed in his cheeks. I smiled and nodded at his overzealous appeal for life and then began looking for Emma. I found her walking hand in hand with Logan toward us. She looked as if she were on cloud nine.

"Hi! Who are you?" Ethan asked as he observed Tanya as she stood quietly and uncomfortably to the side. I turned to see Tanya looking rather surprised at being addressed by what was obviously Edward's and my son. She blinked and looked between the two of them as she no doubt was taking in the complete similarities of the two of them.

"That's a stranger, Ethan. Let's go home" Those were the last words Edward would ever speak to Tanya, because in an instant, I was walking away from her form as Edward tucked me gently into his side and kissed my temple and Ethan and Emma ran to the car to get buckled in.

We didn't speak another word about that but I should of known better than to think it would stay that way.

* * *

Our flight to Cape Cod was thankfully very quiet. The park had done exactly what we had intended it to do... it had worn Ethan out completely. Of course the turkey dinner that Edward had ordered him for dinner a huge contributor to his sleep induced coma for the flight, but all the same... we flew in peace and quiet.

We'd stayed the night in Cape Cod because we arrived there past evening and I wasn't comfortable with flying at night on such a small charter plane that Edward would be flying us on. Edward rolled his eyes but didn't give me a hard time about it and happily booked us a room at a small inn near the airport, so that we could fly out first thing in the morning and have breakfast with the family.

By the time we got the kids settled and in bed, I was exhausted. Connor's sleep schedule was all but forgotten in the wake of all the travel, so instead of being sound asleep, he was wide awake and ready to eat...again.

I was too exhausted to sit with him, so while Edward showered, I took Connor to bed with me and let him feed while I rested my eyes just a bit.

I woke up to the feel of Connor being picked up from my arms. I startled awake thinking he was rolling away from me, but I focused my eyes and saw Edward wearing an apologetic face and still dripping a bit of water from his hair.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I should have waited until he was asleep before I took a shower... I'm afraid I haven't been much help to you recently love... I'm so sorry."

I was almost fully awake now but I was still confused as to why he was so upset. I sat up and watched as he placed Connor in his travel bassinet and kissed him good night.

When the baby was settled, Edward came back to me and knelled at my side before dropping his head into my lap. It was true that recently I had been doing a lot on my own... but that was only because Edward was working more than he used to. It wasn't as if he just got lazy... he just simply wasn't home as much anymore.

"Love, I'm so sorry that..."

"Shh" I stopped him. There really was no cause for his nervousness. I wasn't upset, and he shouldn't have been either.

"Hey... where's this coming from? You do so much, for all of us, Edward. It was just a long day and I was tired... so I fed Connor in bed. No worries." I caressed his face and kissed his forehead before pulling back to look at his eyes.

"Isabella, you're running on absolutely no sleep... I should have bottle fed him and let you shower first... relax. But I didn't, I just got in and relaxed without even thinking about it. That's not how I want to do things with you love... ever. Please don't excuse this... don't let me do things like this."

I couldn't understand why he was so upset. This was really not that big a deal. It's not as if I had fallen over from exhaustion. I had just been extremely busy... we had been moving around a lot and air travel always made me tired. That was nothing new to him.

"Edward, does this have anything to do with seeing Tanya today? Is that why you're being so... emotional?" he popped his head up and looked even more pained.

"Don't say her name, love. I hate that name." He visibly quivered beneath my fingers and I combed through his hair but stayed silent. True... she was a sore spot with us... but we had prevailed. We had found our way back to each other and made it work. And now we were married and had a beautiful family.

"Baby, I know you hate her... I'm not exactly her biggest fan either, but the fact of the matter is that it was seven years ago. It's over. We should take her apology and let it go. She was obviously sorry for everything... and... well, I don't want to hold on to anger anymore. I didn't realize just how exhausting it is to hold onto until I let go of the anger I had for my mom."

His shoulders hunched then and exhaled loudly as if it were a great relief to do so.

"I'm sorry, love. It's just that seeing her... seeing her near you and Connor... it scared the living hell out of me." When he put it that way, I could see why he was so upset. "It was like everything was happening all over again. Like I was watching her getting ready to attack you again."

Edward stood and I followed suit. He went over to Connor's bassinet and we watched our sleeping baby.

"I still have nightmares about what she did to you with Emma... how we almost lost our little girl because of her. I'm not ready to forgive her, Bella. Maybe someday... maybe someday I will accept the words she offered us today. But right now, I don't want to."

I watched him watching Connor and I simply nodded my head. "Okay"

We slept in peace that night... and for the first time this week, Connor slept through the night and Emma and Ethan slept in.

* * *

We flew into Martha's Vineyard the next morning. We were all anxious to get there and see the new house Edward had acquired. Even though he said it was my gift for our anniversary, I still felt as if it were a gift for the family.

When we landed at the small airport, Carlisle and Esme met us there along with our rental for our time on the Island. We all talked amongst ourselves for a small amount of time, I figured we would be going to mom and dad's house immediately, but Edward surprised me by announcing that he and I were going to see our home first. Naturally Emma and Ethan were anxious to hit the beach, so Grandpa Carlisle came to the rescue when he offered to feed them lunch and hit the beach so that Edward and I could get settled with the baby at the new house.

When we got in the rented Mercedes I began to laugh. It was the exact same style vehicle that Edward had bought me when I was pregnant with Emma. It had been a while since I had it now... but sitting inside of it made me nostalgic.

"What is it, sweetheart?" I turned to see Edward getting in the drivers side after buckling in the baby. I smiled impossibly wider and kissed him before pulling back and telling him.

"This is exactly like the car you bought me when I was pregnant with Emma. Remember?" Realization dawned across his face and then a myriad of different emotions passed him in an instant. "I remember..." he trailed off with a smile.

I looked back to see Connor already fast asleep in his chair while the air conditioner gently swept over him from the vents above.

"It's been a long time since it was just one baby and the two of us." Edward began laughing gently then and squeezed my hand before starting the car.

We drove in silence through the familiar area. I had a vague idea of where our beach house was, but I wasn't certain of the exact location. I knew that we were only a mile or so from Carlisle and Esme though, so that was refreshing that we were close but had our own space as well.

As we wound around the familiar curves and turns that the area housed, I began growing more anxious and excited. It could have been a shanty for all I cared, but I knew Edward well enough to know that our beach home would be nothing short of extraordinary.

He did not disappoint.

He pulled our vehicle into a tree lined drive that reminded me of our home waiting for us in Chicago. He drive slowly... as if he knew I was in suspense for what would be coming into sight soon. As the drive continued to wind, I could see the faint view of white and gray. It was the shingles to what could only be a two story home...

"Happy anniversary, my love" and as he said that final word, he turned a corner and I was looking at our vacation home.

As I had presumed, it was two stories and housed a wrap around porch. Edward parked the car in front of what could have easily been Charlies home in Forks, but as it was... happened to be our garage.

"We have our own dock, and the property is less than what we have in Chicago... but then again, this is the Vineyard. It's about 1 and a half acres, give or take a few. The beach is a mile by foot... but... again we have the dock for the boat, so it's not even that much distance..."

I was still trying to comprehend that this was ours... that we _owned_ this. I didn't realize I was crying until I heard Connor fussing in Edwards arms. I turned to calm him but Edward held on to him and wiped away my tears as he smiled lovingly at me.

"Go on inside love... go enjoy your present."

"You bought me a house? For marrying you? For loving you...?" Edward simply smiled wider and nodded.

"You forgot for giving me everything I ever wanted and more... for things I forgot to ask for love. You are the key to my world... this is nothing compared to the three amazing gifts you have given me. Nothing I ever buy you will compare to the priceless gifts you have given me."

I had explored for over two hours. I had sat out at the dock for nearly an hour alone. It would take me longer than the short month we would spend here to truly appreciate it, but I would have the rest of our lives to appreciate it fully. While I had sat out on the dock, I thought briefly about how much Charlie would of appreciated it. I made a mental note to ask Edward about inviting him our for a weekend while we were here.

Esme and Carlise had shown up hours later with the kids and then Jasper and Alice trailed in a few moments behind them. I thought for sure that everyone would be anxious to go to Mom and Dad's house, but amazingly, no one seemed to be at all ready to leave.

When the kids were bathed and exhausted from their day on the beach, they retired early and we adults were able to relax a lot more. Jasper and Edward were cooking fresh crab they had just caught and Carlisle had gone into town for a quick errand. So we ladies hung out on the patio out back lit up with soft lanterns and talked about the amazing gift I had received for my anniversary.

Esme was just finishing up her ideas for the remodel I wanted to do inside when a throat cleared from the doorway. We all stopped and turned but I almost fell out of my chair when I saw Charlie standing in the door way with Carlisle.

"Dad?" I was off my chair and hugging him tightly as I let it sink in that he was actually here.

"Hey, Bells... nice place you got here." he chuckled out over what sounded like tears. I pulled back and looked at all the faces around me. They were all wearing smiles and a few of them had tears... I also noticed that two more sets of eyes were with us now and the green ones belonged to my husband.

"Good to see you again, Charlie" I moved to Edwards arms as he shook Charlies hand and everyone else said their hello's. I felt lips on my cheek and then Edwards whispered words in my ear, "Happy Anniversary my love."

I hugged Edward with everything I had in me. "Thank you... for... for _all of this_" I gestured to the house and the property... to Charlie.

"I promised to lavish you, love. And I will do just that... forever"

I knew that he would always feel as if he owed me more than he did. All of that stemmed from our beginning... but I also knew that one day, he would forgive Tanya, that he would forgive himself. I was willing to be as patient as he would need me to be, because he had been patient for me.

So as I sat on the porch of our vacation home, surrounded by the people I loved, three things became very clear to me. One was that Edward was my soul mate. Two was that he would always surprise me... to the extreme. And three... I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

_The End_


End file.
